AN EXISTENTIAL-PHENOMENOLOGICAL APPROACH TO UNDERSTANDING THE EXPERIENCE OF MARITAL SATISFACTION By PETER CAWSEY B.R.E., University of British Columbia, 1973 A THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF MASTER OF ARTS in THE FACULTY OF GRADUATE STUDIES (DEPARTMENT OF COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY) We accept this thesis as conforming to tjhe reqtjired standard THE UNIVERSITY OF BRITISH COLUMBIA April 1985 ©Peter Cawsey, 1985 In presenting this thesis in partial fulfilment of the requirements for an advanced degree at the University of British Columbia, I agree that the Library shall make it freely available for reference and study. I further agree that permission for extensive copying of this thesis for scholarly purposes may be granted by the head of my department or by his or her representatives. It is understood that copying or publication of this thesis for financial gain shall not be allowed without my written permission. Department Of Counselling Psychology The University of British Columbia 1956 Main Mall Vancouver, Canada V6T 1Y3 Date April 26, 1985 DE-6 (3/81) ABSTRACT This study is an existential-phenomenological investigation into the experience of marital satisfaction. It sought to understand the meaning of marital satisfaction as lived. Five married individuals, three females and two males, who had been married for ten years or longer were interviewed. They were selected on the basis that they were experiencing satisfaction in their marriage by their own reckoning. They were located through personal referrals from friends and colleagues. Each person (co-researcher) was asked to tell the story of satisfaction in their marriage. The in-depth interviews were tape-recorded, transcribed and analyzed using an existential- phenomenological approach as outlined by Colaizzi (1978). The protocol analysis resulted in the explication of fifteen themes. The themes (or constituents) were described and then woven into an exhaustive phenomenological description of the experience of marital satisfaction. Finally a concise description of the experience was formulated. The results of the study show that there is a consensus of the experience and meaning of marital satisfaction by those (the co-researchers) living the experience. The study makes suggestions for future research and points out applications of the results in pre-marital and couples counselling. - iii - TABLE OF CONTENTS Page ABSTRACT ...... ii TABLE OF CONTENTS - iii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS iv DEDICATION vi CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION 1 Objective of the Study 1 Significance of the Study 2 Personal Explication of Assumptions . .. 8 CHAPTER II REVIEW OF RELATED LITERATURE 11 Introduction 11 Overview of Research on Marital Satisfaction. 13 Theories of Marital Satisfaction. 22 Psychoanalytic Theory 22 Classical 22 Object Relations 24 Conclusion • 26 Basic Assumptions 28 Symbolic Interaction Theory 29 Basic Assumptions 35 Social Exchange Theory 36 Basic Assumptions 40 Behavioral Theory 41 Basic Assumptions «, 44 Summary of Theories • 45 CHAPTER III METHOD 47 Existential-Phenomenological Psychology - - 47 Co-researchers 49 Selection of Co-researchers 49 Deciding Whether to Interview Individuals or Couple 51 - iv - Page Demographic Information 52 Phenomenological Interview 53 Procedure 54 Analysis of Protocols 56 CHAPTER IV RESULTS 58 Introduction 58 Description of Themes of the Experience 61 Exhaustive Description of the Experience of Marital Satisfaction 68 Introduction 68 Exhaustive Description 70 Condensed Description of the Experience of Marital Satisfaction 78 CHAPTER V DISCUSSION 81 Summary 81 Personal Dialogue 82 Thoretical Implications 83 Implications for Counselling 86 Implications for Future Research 89 Conclusions 90 REFERENCES 92 TABLE 2: Significant Statements 99 APPENDIX A: Letter of Introduction and Subject Consent Form 109 APPENDIX B: Co-researchers' Protocols Ill - v - ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I owe special thanks to my five co-researchers for their time and effort in sharing a special part of their lives with me. Without their stories of marital satisfaction this study would not have been possible. I would also like to warmly thank my committee chairman, Dr. Marv Westwood, for his time, advice and ever present ability to listen and exchange Ideas ln a supportive and friendly manner. My two other committee members, Dr. Larry Cochran and Dr. Bob Armstrong, were very much appreciated for always being available on short notice to offer guidance and support. - vi - DEDICATION To my son Ryan - vii - All happy families resemble each other; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Anna Karenin Count Leo Tolstoy, 1904 - 1 - CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION Objective of the Study When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part. Thus wrote George Bernard Shaw in 1908 in the preface to his play Getting Married. If the marital relationship is based on such a seemingly irrational footing (according to Shaw) how is it that some marriages can survive the current statistics of record high divorce rates? Statistics Canada reported that in 1982 some 70,436 divorces were granted in Canada, more than double the 32,389 granted ten years before. Canada's divorce rate in 1982 soared 117 percent over 1972. Divorces involved 65,000 dependent children, up from 37,500 in 1972 (Statistics Canada, 1982). Divorce rates indicate only those marriages that have reached the point of being intolerable for one or both partners. Many marriages remain Intact only because of social pressures, financial constraints, children, edicts of religion or lack of attractive alternatives rather than any inherent desirability. That is, as Lewis and Spanier (1979) point out, "marriages with high stability cannot be assumed to have high quality" (p. 272). - 2 - What exactly is the phenomenon of "marital satisfaction" that a marriage of quality offers? What constitutes this sought after experience that so many marriages fail to achieve? The purpose of this study is to better understand what it is in a marital dyad that not only keeps the couple together but offers them satisfaction in their marriage. This study phenomenologically investigate the experience of marital satisfaction. Significance of the Study Divorce rates indicate marital stability. Lewis and Spanier (1979) define marital stability as "the formal or informal status of a marriage intact or nonintact. Strictly speaking, a stable marriage is one which is terminated by the natural death of one spouse" (p. 269). They believe that "the greatest single predictor of marital stability is marital quality" (p. 273). They define marital quality as "a subjective evaluation of a married couple's relationship. reflecting numerous characteristics of marital interaction and marital functioning" (p. 269). Lewis and Spanier (1979) suggest that "high marital quality is associated with good judgement, adequate communication, a high level of marital happiness and adjustment, integration, and a high degree of satisfaction with the relationship" (p. 269). Marital satisfaction has been recognized as one of a number of concepts that researchers have used to study marital quality or happiness. Burr (1973) stated that "satisfaction is a subjective phenomenon that occurs within individuals" (p. 42). He defines marital - 3 - satisfaction as "the degree to which the desires of the individual are fulfilled . satisfaction with a marriage situation as a whole. this phenomenon is viewed as a continous variable varying in degrees from low to high satisfaction" (p. 42). Another investigator of marital satisfaction who has attempted a definition is Hawkins (1968). His conception of marital satisfaction is that: Marital satisfaction may be defined as the subjective feelings of happiness, satisfaction, and pleasure experienced by a spouse when considering all current aspects of his [sic] marriage. This variable is conceived as a continuum running from much satisfaction to much dissatisfaction. Marital satisfaction is clearly an attitudinal variable and, thus, is a property of individual spouses. ... it is a global measurement in the sense that the respondent is asked to express his [sic] feelings of satisfaction or dissatisfaction regarding large numbers of specific facets of the marriage by responding to a few questions phrased very generally, (p. 648) In his review and integration of research in marriage, Tharp (1963), wondered about the real meaning of the subjective phenomenon of marital satisfaction. He stated, "certainly satisfaction now seems related to happiness, perhaps tautologically. But satisfaction of what?" (p. 114). A number of other researchers have noted the difficulty in conceptualizing marital satisfaction (Hicks and Piatt, 1970; Spanier and Cole, 1976; Spanier and Lewis, 1980; and Burr, Leigh, Day and Constantine, 1979). Burr et al. (1979) clarify the situation - 4 - somewhat by pointing out a general inconsistency in the research that they have noted. We wish it were an easy task to define the dependent variable of satisfaction, or that there were only one or two definitions to choose from. Unfortunately, however, neither is the case. The task is complex and it is probably not possible at this time to achieve a consensus about what the term "satisfaction" denotes. There is ambiguity in much of what has been done, and among the unambiguous definitions