THE TuLANE HULLABALOO -----------VIEWS SEPTEMBEH 12, 2008 ·POLITICS· ·POLITICS· See beyond Palin's gender Caught adrift between I'm totally her unveiling at the convention. ly CC'd for official "first dude" two bad decisions voting for Sar- It's not like there are that many business. November policies. ah Palin. Yes, statements to look at anyway! When Sarah Palin is our lady 4th: My very He tried to reassure us about his technically I'll Sure, she tried to get the city Vice President (as \vill be her offi- first presiden- inexperience with Joe Biden, a D.C. "Do you think Sarah be voting for librarian fired after she became cial title), I know she'll be a strong tial election. I veteran, and it worked to an extent Palin will help John McCain, mayor of Wasilla because the li- voice for government reform. She finally get to George W Bush, though, green but I'm willing brarian supported her oppo- said "No thanks!" to the Bridge to have a say in when elected, surrounded himself Elizabeth the Republicans to do whatever nent in the election. But it's not Nowhere... After fighting for the who will lead with D.C. veterans and look what McNamara it takes to get Sarah's fault that the woman money and talking about her sup- Lauren our nation for happened. this Fall?" Sarah Barra- wouldn't ban books; if she can't port for the bridge until well after Noel the next four You see the seesawing cuda in the White ｈ ｯ ｵ ｳ ｾ Ｎ I'm so do her job properly, she deserves it had become a national joke. years. The only dilemma. thrilled that the Republicans fi- to be fired. She only kept the money be- problem is - The third party option keeps nally realized that the only rea- And yes, she may have improp- cause she cares so much about what the hell do I want to say? resurfacing from people around son anyone was voting for Hillary erly fired a state trooper because the citizens of Alaska; although, All across the country, people me. I could subvert the current Clinton was because she had the that trooper wouldn't fire her sis- probably not as much as her are asking themselves the same bipartisan system for forcing me same genitalia as they did. I don't ter's now ex-husband, but she husband, who until 2002 was thing. We are called the swing votes to choose from only two people. know what all this talk about the member of a political par- (or voters1 and with only a couple But then it comes down to throw- "ideasn and "policy positionsn is ty whose main goal was Alaskan of months left, the campaigns are ing away a vote. (Sorry Nader fans, supposed to imply. Women agree "Sure, she tried secession. coming for us. The battle over the but the only way a third party can- on everything! Sarah Palin will be great at remaining undecided is going to be didate could ever get elected is if She says she's "as pro-life as to get the city handling foreign policy issues, fierce. This leaves the still-grappling the candidate is already extreme- "No, I don't. I don't think any candidate can be; but, when librarian fired ... too. She said it herself to Charlie with the daunting task of sifting ly wen-known and loved by the she's qualified." her oldest daughter got preg- Gibson last night: "You can actu- through the dirt to find the facts. American people.) nant (now we have proof that But it's not Sarah's ally see Russia from land here in Here are some facts. America likes to think of itselfas Laura Gestaut abstinence-only education does Alaska.n I've already sent in my ap- John McCain wants to contin- a democratic nation, but how dem- Masters of Public Health fa ult that the second year work), she said that she let Bris- woman wouldn't plication for Secretary of Trans- ue current Bush administration ocratic is it ifsomeone doesn't like tol make the decision for herself. portation, I figure that since I've economic practices, will continue either of the major parties? It's not So she'd definitely trust the rest ban books. flown in planes and I own a car, wars in nations in which we don't as if this frustration is a small mi- of America to make that choice. I'm pretty much a lock. belong and looks like he could kick nority, either. Right? Let's not forget that she's Lastly, I'm most excited to cast the bucket any day. Eventually, most of us decide for capital punishment. So she found a competent replacement my vote for Sarah Palin because I On the Republican end, that at the last minute or choose not to can't be pro-life. right away. Just because this "im- know she shares my values. She would leave us with Sarah Palin - vote at all. The only thing I have fig- I don't buy this nonsense provement" was known for sexu- tells blatant lies in her stump a neo-Nazi who wants to ban "ob- ured out is that I cannot bring my- about her not being vetted prop- al harassment and incompetence speech and repeats them even in jectionable material" from pub- self to vote for McCain. Whether erly. After Barack Obama made doesn't mean he can't be a great the face of irrefutable evidence. lic libraries and set women's rights that means throwing away myvote that mean speech about his op- state trooper. Her handpicked police chief back 40 years. on an independent or taking the ponent being out of touch, Mc- He was fired two weeks lat- doesn't want to burden the tax- The Democrats have given us leap of faith with Obama remains ·ves, 'cause stie's Cain had to do something to er for completely unrelated rea- payers with things like medi- BarackObama Thecurrentmedia, uncertain. ｡ ｴ ｴ ｲ ｡ ｣ ｴ ｩ ｾ ･ n show he was tuned in to main- sons, I'm sure. cal exams ·for rape victims. She celebrity and generation Y frenzy What is certain, though, is that stream America. And between Luckily, Palin is being com- mocks things like civil rights over him would make one think this two-party problem is getting Aaron Gauri the Democrats almost nominat- ｰ ｬ ･ ｴ ｾ ｬ ｹ open about the trooper and community service. Lucky he's the Messiah American politics old. Wat.ching both campaigns freshman ing what's-her-name and this trial. It's a coincidence that her for John McCain, I'm stupid has needed for decades. He's young, rip each other to shreds over slips psychology Tina Fey character being so pop- main critic in the Alaska Nation- enough to vote for anything with captivating and of mixed racial de- of the tongue and church affilia- ular lately, what choice did he al Guard changed his story and a vagina. scent - a living American dream. tions is disheartening. A year ago, have? got promoted (by her office) the His problem: Llke mysel.t; many the upcoming presidential election Now Barack Obama and the next day. Elizabeth McNamara is a ju- in America still don't buy it. Cer- made me giddy. Now I'm just ex- media are being horrifyingly sex- And claiming.executive privi- nior in Newcomb-Tulane College tainly Obama has appeal, but right hausted, and I still don't know who ist towards Sarah. I can't believe lege on the Yahoo! E-mail address and is currently participating in now that appeal seems rooted in a I'm voting for. they would insinuate that she's that she inappropriately used for Semester in Washington. She can vivacious personality and a bright lied about almost every state- state business is completely ko- be reachedfor comment at lizzmc- smile. But when it comes down to Lauren Noel is the managing ed- ment she's made in public since sher, Todd Palin was obvious- [email protected]. it, many of his fiscal policies veer itorfor the Hullabaloo and a senior frightfully toward socialism. in Newcomb-Tulane College. She can Or maybe it's time for Amer- be reached for comment at lnoel@ ica to embrace new economic tulane.edu. ·ves. Cause she's gorna ll.fE MEDJA5 .• YKJULP 1HE.Y BE get \ots of 1-\1 laty s votes. CRITICJSMOF ASKINGsu:H ·CAMPUS· And 'cause she's so ｓ ａ ｒ ａ ｈ ｾ ｉ ｎ ｉ ｓ QL'fsnor£1F radical" SEXIST/. .. , SHEWASNTA MTV ·backlash MikeWolson freshman 5\\0KIN'-HOT You can love ers' abstinence just leaves more finance BABE ...? it. or you can girls for the self-professed funner hate it, but once sex addict. Maybe he's just jealous it's time for the oftheir self-control. MrV Video American Idol winner and fel- Music Awards low purity ring promoter Jordin again, you pret- Sparks came to the boys' defense, Hannah ty much can't saying "It's not bad to wear a prom- Egner ignore it From ise ring. because not every guy and the nonstop girl wants to be a slut, ok'r promotions to If the Jonas Brothers carry so the 500 reruns to the endless re- much weight among, young peo- sponses and backlash, MrV al· ple that they can make abstinence ways manages to cause some kind seem cool, they should be com- ·she's had a successful ofstir.