British Gestalt Journal Copyright 2002 by GPTI Publications Ltd. 2002, Vol.11, No.1, 64-66 OPINION WHEN ‘OTHER’ IS LESS THAN... Robert W. Resnick In May 1997 I gave the keynote address for the 20th we need to remember that each and every one of ‘us’ is Anniversary Long Island (N.Y.) Gestalt Therapy Center somebody else’s ‘other’.) Conference at Hofstra University. When the ‘other’ is disconnected and exists in the Near the end of that presentation I told the audience, as background (as neutral or negative), ‘other’ essentially an aside, that what follows is the ten percent that I wanted becomes ‘dehumanise’. Unfortunately, it then seems that them to take home with them and remember (research it does not make too much difference what effect my says that people remember only ten percent from lecture actions have on this distant (and dissimilar to me) ‘other’. presentations). The relevance of these excerpts from the (Of course, from ‘their’ point of view, ‘they’ are fully last part of the keynote address to the events of September human and ‘we’ are not. Again, ‘we’ are their ‘other’.) 11, 2001 and subsequently is, hopefully, self-evident. The Nazis had a very clear view of ‘otherness’. In their We are not merely a-contextual individuals. We can system, Gypsies, Jews, homosexuals, non-Aryans, only exist within, and as part of, the larger field. If we do political enemies, etc., were all ‘other’. It was justifiable not pay any attention to that larger field of ‘otherness’, we and rational (within their phenomenological organisation) are going to be in trouble. And yes, ‘we’ are in trouble. to obliterate those people for the ‘betterment’ of the Most of us know that as soon as we separate an ‘us’ world, meaning the betterment for ‘them’ because ‘they’ from a ‘them’, we are building a ground where were the world and ‘non-them’ were only ‘other’. ‘Other’ horrendous things can happen. An ‘us’ is created with could then be maltreated and/or annihilated. Ironically, perhaps an over identification of similarities with some throughout history, such annihilation is often pursued with people and a narrow focusing on differences attributed to ‘moral’ authority – e.g. the crusades, the inquisition, the others who then become ‘them’. Similarities are usually holocaust, ethnic cleansing, etc. highly valued and differences are frequently seen as Most of us can see the process when we are talking negative. ‘Us’ and ‘them’ is not a dichotomy but rather a about the Nazis and the Holocaust. We have a little more continuum of progressive concentric circles beginning difficulty when we start seeing it springing up all over the with: world – sometimes subtle and sometimes not. The most ‘me’ (followed by) horrendous reality to me is that it looks like most, if not all ‘me and you’, people, are capable of doing these kinds of things to other ‘family’, people once they have dehumanised the ‘other’:in ‘friends’, Rwanda, the Tutsi and the Hutu; in the Middle East, the ‘acquaintances’ (to the ever larger concentric circles, Israelis and the Palestinians; in central Asia, the Taliban to continuing with) other Afghans; in the Balkans, the Serbs and Croats; in ‘people I don’t know who “are similar to me”’, America, the whites and the African and Native ‘who are different from me,’ Americans; in Asia, the Japanese in China and Korea (in and then ‘people I don’t even know that exist in some WWII); and both the North and South Vietnamese and other part of the planet’. the Cambodian killing fields, to note a few. Iamtalkingabouttheunspeakablethingspeopledoto As we move down the continuum, our shared human each ‘other’ when ‘other’ is far enough removed and relatedness fades. At one of these concentric circles – disconnected from ‘us’. ‘Other’ does not have the same generally where we perceive less and less similarity humanness and the same human qualities as ‘we’ do. between ourselves and others on dimensions we deem to be important – we become ‘us’ and people outside the Righteousness circle become ‘other’ or ‘them’. At first, ‘other’ is either neutral (which is the beginning What is sobering and frightening to me is that our own of trouble since we are no longer connected as full human organised religions, unwittingly (I think and hope) beings), or ‘other’ becomes negative (which is a guarantee maintain, support and contribute to the creation of this of trouble). This trouble is usually initially for the ‘other’, view of ‘otherness’. Practically every organised religion I and inevitably, it turns out to be trouble for ‘us’ too. (And know (except perhaps, some forms of Buddhism and 65 Animism) operates on the same basic tenet – perhaps the way’. The Christian view, that we are ‘the way’ and ‘the major cancer at our social and political core – only way’, supported demoting the ‘otherness’ of the righteousness!OldTestament,NewTestamentand Jews (as well as other non-Christians) as much as the Koran all agree about this. Each believes ‘they’ are right centuries of explicit anti-Judaism. and all ‘others’ are wrong and therefore not as good or There is only one true God and one true set of beliefs worthy. These views, unfortunately, are not limited to the and each religion is convinced that it has captured the real fanatic lunatic fringes but more likely represent the modal thing and that all ‘others’ are pretenders. Monumental points of view of the mainstream. arrogance. Religions start with being ‘a way’ and soon become ‘the only way’ Anybody who does not come ‘our’ way is Although Judaism and Christianity were given as less than ‘we’ are (not just different but less)... they are examples in this keynote address, clearly Islam and the ‘other’– the heathen, the infidels, the pagans, the lost, the teachings of the Koran also hold these same views very devils, the sinners, etc. emphatically and explicitly. Muslims also believe and Jews do it with their notion of being the ‘chosen people’ profess that they have the reality and only Allah is God. of God. Chosen for what? If you look at what they are The fanatic extreme is exemplified by the righteous chosen for, it has not been very attractive – Inquisition? Taliban of Afghanistan, but the core of righteousness is Pogroms? Holocaust? Being the ‘chosen people’, throughout the mainstream of Islam, Judaism and however, has a very clear implication of being special and Christianity. ‘Too often, monotheists confuse one God that the rest of the world is not chosen and not special. with one way’ (Halevi, Yoss, L.A. Times, September 27, The word for ‘other’ in Yiddish has a very negative 2001). connotation – not even neutral. The word is ‘goyim’. As pointed out to me (by the editor of this journal), I too Goyim or Goy, as every Jew knows, has a strong am not immune from the trap of getting locked into the pejorative spin to it. It is not the same, for example, as the ‘us’ and ‘them’ syndrome when I talk about, for example, word ‘Gentile’ is in English... Goy is just not a nice word. religions. I too am of the field. As far as I know, there is not a nice word in Yiddish for My attempt is to allow for differential reactions – non-Jew. Shicksa (female Gentile) and Shagetz (male including criticisms – to ideas, beliefs, concepts, values, Gentile) too are clearly negative. Frightening. and ideologies without tying them to all people in a group Christianity is no better in its collective righteousness. and without reducing those that hold these ‘other’ views There is only one way. ‘Jesus saith to him: I am the way, to a ‘less than’ position. My disagreement is with the and the truth, and the life. No man cometh to the Father, ideas and not with those who hold the ideas –notwith but by me’ (John, 14:6). If you do not come through me any particular religion, institution, colour, race, ethnicity, (Jesus Christ), you cannot be saved – or even be OK. culture, etc. Furthermore, while I do not diminish those Hans Kung, a Swiss Catholic priest and theologian people who do hold the religious views I have spoken (from Tubingen University) has been officially silenced about, I do abhor these views and their impact on our by the church. After reading the second Vatican Council world – regardless of who holds them. It would be unreal documents, Kung commented that the Catholic church’s and even foolish to pretend that differences in points of position of standing by during the Holocaust and being view do not include both negative and positive biases. silent was a relatively minor part of the church’s contribution. Kung said, ‘It was no longer possible to say Polarities that the Nazis were responsible without saying the church is co-responsible. Nazi anti-Semitism would have been The dilemma is clear: how can we hold different points impossible without 2,000 years of Christian anti-Judaism.’ of view – even with a negative valence towards others’ It was not racial, it was religious. (Less than a year after points of view – without becoming righteous, demeaning this keynote address was given in 1997, Pope John Paul II and dismissive of those that hold the other points of view? and the Vatican have essentially and quietly confirmed How do I remain respectful (acknowledge the existence much of Kung’s point of view: We Remember: A thereof) and hold both ends of polarities without Reflection On The Shoah, March, 19981.) refracting the world into dichotomous black and white, Kung is not holding the Catholic church or Christianity right and wrong, good and bad, more and less than? responsible for the Holocaust.