Short Jokes The Perfect Son. A: I have the perfect son. B: Does he smoke? A: No, he doesn't. B: Does he drink whiskey? A: No, he doesn't. B: Does he ever come home late? A: No, he doesn't. B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he? A: He will be six months old next Wednesday. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things. Boy: What are the two things? Girl: Your feet. "The Girl Is Mine" by Michael Jackson [1st Verse (Michael)] Every Night She Walks Right In My Dreams Since I Met Her From The Start I'm So Proud I Am The Only One Who Is Special In Her Heart [Chorus] The Girl Is Mine The Doggone Girl Is Mine I Know She's Mine Because The Doggone Girl Is Mine [2nd Verse (Paul)] I Don't Understand The Way You Think Saying That She's Yours Not Mine Sending Roses And Your Silly Dreams Really Just A Waste Of Time [Chorus] Because She's Mine The Doggone Girl Is Mine Don't Waste Your Time Because The Doggone Girl Is Mine [Bridge (Paul)] I Love You More Than He (Take You Anywhere) [Michael] But I Love You Endlessly (Loving We Will Share) [Michael & Paul] So Come And Go With Me To One Town [Michael] But We Both Cannot Have Her So It's One Or The Other And One Day You'll Discover That She's My Girl Forever And Ever [3rd Verse (Paul)] I Don't Build Your Hopes To Be Let Down 'Cause I Really Feel It's Time [Michael] I Know She'll Tell You I'm The One For Her 'Cause She Said I Blow Her Mind Chorus (Michael) The Girl Is Mine The Doggone Girl Is Mine Don't Waste Your Time Because The Doggone Girl Is Mine [Michael & Paul] She's Mine, She's Mine No, No, No, She's Mine The Girl Is Mine, The Girl Is Mine The Girl Is Mine, The Girl Is Mine [Paul] The Girl Is Mine, (Yep) She's Mine The Girl Is Mine, (Yep) She's Mine [Michael] Don't Waste Your Time Because The Doggone Girl Is Mine The Girl Is Mine, The Girl Is Mine [Paul] Michael, We're Not Going To Fight About This, Okay [Michael] Paul, I Think I Told You, I'm A Lover Not A Fighter [Paul] I've Heard It All Before, Michael She Told Me That I'm Her Forever Lover, You Know, Don't You Remember [Michael] Well, After Loving Me, She Said She Couldn't Love Another [Paul] Is That What She Said [Michael] Yes, She Said It, You Keep Dreaming [Paul] I Don't Believe It [Michael & Paul] The Girl Is Mine (Mine, Mine, Mine) TASK 1 - My name is Luca by Susan Vega1 Listen to the song and complete the activity. MY NAME IS LUKA My name is Luka I live on the second -FLOOR----- I live --UPSTAIRS------ from you Yes, I think you've--SEEN---- me before -IF--- you hear something--LATE---- at night Some kind of--TROUBLE---- some kind of fight --JUST--- don't ask me what it was --JUST--- don't ask me what it was --JUST--- don't ask me what it was I think it's because I'm- clumsy I try not to talk too- loud Maybe It's because I'm crazy I try not to act too proud They only hit---UNTIL-- you cry And after that you don't ask why You just don't-ME---- anymore You just don't-ME----- anymore You just don't-ME----- anymore Yes, I think I'm okay I walked into the door again Well, if you ask that's what I'll say And it's not your---BUSINESS---- anyway I I'd like to be alone With nothing broken, nothing thrown Just don't ask me---HOW- I am Just don't ask me--HOW--- I am Just don't ask me--HOW--- I am My name is Luka I live on the second----FLOOR--- I live --UPSTAIRS--- from you Yes, I think you've--SEEN---- me before -IF--- you hear something -LATE--- at night Some kind of --TROUBLE----- some kind of fight ---JUST- don't ask me what it was --JUST-- don't ask me what it was -JUST--- don't ask me what it was They only hit-UNTIL---- you cry And after that you don't ask why You just don't--ME--- anymore You just don't---ME-- anymore You just don't--ME--- anymore RIDDLES What is that is always coming but never arrives? TOMORROW A cloud was my mother, the wind is my father, my son is the cool stream, and my daughter is the fruit of the land. A rainbow is my bed, the earth my final resting place, and I'm the torment of man. Who am I? RAIN .