Brentonian 2019 EDITION 40 Years of Female Head Prefects Tammy Toriglia (Morrison), B. Sc. Pharma HEAD PREFECT 1979 Lulu Jama, HEAD PREFECT 2019 The Magazine for the Brentwood Family message from the EDITOR The job of editing is a fascinating and daunting one. To take the thoughts, contributions, and intent of so many others and to try to mould them into a coherent, engaging and hopefully worthwhile read is a task I take seriously. I am humbled to work with such great people who make my job so easy. This year‘s magazine pays homage to a Brentwood legend, Nick Prowse, who passed away earlier this year. I apologize that we could not include the vast number of testimonials we 2018/19 Marketing Team: Mike Minckler, received for Mr. Prowse. Clearly, his 35 years at Brentwood had Kelly Gagne, Georgia Collins, Ian McPherson an impact on generations of students. We have tried to capture some of that here. We also pay tribute to a number of retiring faculty which sadly includes the dynamic Felix duo. As Marius and Andrea depart the West Coast to be with their family in Ottawa, they leave behind an incredibly enriched campus and numerous lives influenced and affected positively for years to come. As do Mrs. Martin, Mrs. Carr and Mrs. Patel. While Ms. Mais has left her 2018/19 Advancement: Michelle Pace, beloved Alexandra House she will continue to be a larger than Chris Spicer, Tracy Arden, Amy Weinberg Board of Governors life campus presence in the Learning Commons. I would like to thank everybody who contributed to this year‘s magazine, EXECUTIVE Bruce Homer (’69) HEAD OF SCHOOL & CEO special thanks to Ms. Gagne for all her work. I hope you enjoy the read. CHAIR Blair Horn (’79) Andrew Housser (’91) Bud Patel, parent of Mitali (’16) & Antara (’18) VICE CHAIR Karen (Middleton) Pirie (’81) David W. Mackenzie (’69), parent of Henry parent of Jack (‘20) (’02) DIRECTOR OF FINANCE Ian McPherson Dale Martin (’78) TREASURER Dan Jarvis, parent of David Burton (’93), parent of Holly (’21) & DIRECTOR OF COMMUNICATIONS AND MARKETING Betsy (’09) Scott Matheson (’79), parent of Sarah (’11) & Bridget (’23) Andrew (’13) BOARD MEMBERS John A. McNeill (’82), parent of Hannah (’17 ) Ian McPherson Bruce Carlson (’64), parent of Joanna & & Grace (’20) & William (’20) ON THE COVER: Tammy Toriglia ‘79 EDITING & PRODUCTION: Vanessa (’92), Jessie (’95) & Nancy (’98) Samara Walbohm (’89) – parent of Solaia (‘20) and Lulu Jama ‘19 DESIGN & LAYOUT: Kelly Gagné C.C. (Kip) Woodward (’74), parent of David Andrea C. (McDonald) Common (’75) CONTENT: Amy Weinberg, Chris Spicer, Tracy Arden and all the other contributing authors parent of Hew (’86), Claire (’91) (’99) & Justin (’01) Art Crooks, (Photo by Ian McPherson) & Morgan (’94) Tammie Toriglia ('79), parent of Megan ('09) PHOTOGRAPHY: Paul Fletcher, Jim Ganley, Mike Minckler, John Pettit, Ian McPherson, students, staff, faculty and parents who have Brock Harris (’93) and Hailey ('12) submitted photos –Thank you! PRINTED IN CANADA www.brentwood.ca : 3 Brentonian 2019 EDITION Index 6 Timeless Agreements 132 Sol Milne ‘10 MESSAGE FROM BUD PATEL, A CONSERVATION CONVERSATION HEAD OF SCHOOL 136 TEDx 8 Annual Review IMPACT 28 Thank You Marius & Andrea Felix 138 Sasha Mervyn ‘94 A CREATIVE DIRECTION 34 Wendy Patel Farewell 140 John Queen 36 Ode to Alanna Martin 50 YEARS OF SERVICE 38 A Courageous Pioneer, Leslie Carr Passions (Alumni Q&A) 112 JOSEPH MORGAN ‘73 42 Lulu Jama ‘19 & Tammie Toriglia ‘79 114 GREGORY ABAKHAN ‘89 40 YEARS OF FEMALE HEAD PREFECTS 116 OPHELIA CHUA ‘08 118 CYNTHIA HARRIS ‘96 91 Philanthropy 120 MCKENZIE LEE ‘06 CELEBRATING GIVING 122 ZETHU SHEBANGU ‘16 Alumni Update 111 Passions 54 EVENTS PHOTOS Q&A WITH OLD BRENTONIANS 68 CLASS NOTES 70 WEDDINGS AND BIRTHS 126 Remembering Nick Prowse OBITUARIES A LEGENDARY BRENTONIAN 72 78 ALUMNI AWARDS 82 BRENTONIAN CONNECT WEEKEND 84 CAREERS WEEK 86 MENTORSHIP PROGRAM DEPARTMENTS Campus Life ....................................................................................... 10 University Counselling ................................................................... 22 Athletics Highlights .......................................................................... 14 Presenting the Class of 2018 ........................................................ 24 Academic Highlights ........................................................................ 16 Welcome New Faculty .................................................................. 124 Arts Highlights .................................................................................. 20 Valete .................................................................................................. 125 4 : THE BRENTONIAN : 2019 www.brentwood.ca : 5 Communicate with others as clearly as such people attempt to preserve Agreements, this lesson is perhaps we can to avoid misunderstandings, their self-esteem, not by taking in the the most important and the easiest sadness and drama.” feedback and altering their behaviour, but to control. We don’t need a teacher, Every day our interactions with others by attacking the source of the threat.” houseparent, art instructor, coach, can be complicated and it can, at On February 2nd, our seniors were advisor or parent to tell us that we’re not timeless times, cause us to jump to conclusions. performing our best. The only person treated to a presentation by Valerie When interpreting the tone of an email, Young who spoke about “the imposter who really knows is the one staring Snapchat message or conversation, syndrome”. One thing she said that back at us in the mirror. In our heart of agreements our fight or flight reflex often brings out morning connects this Agreement to the hearts, we know if we have prepared our protective gene that automatically for that exam, trained for that event, and Bud Patel, Head of School professors’ findings. Instead of viewing secretes negative assumptions.“They feedback as a personal critique, she completed that task. Not to a minimal don’t like me. They don’t standard but our best standard. understand me. They’re not We may not always get there listening to me.” Fighting this but surely we must strive to be even decades later. The lessons learned mastered, can provide solace, direction initial assumption blast can be our best selves. on this campus cross generations and and purpose. The 2005 Grad told me challenging, but Ruiz says we remain timeless. While my conversations that these Four Agreements are the Be impeccable with your word must take people at face value with our Old Brentonians continue to cornerstones of how she lives her life. Don’t make assumptions and take their word as an honour amaze, it was one with a 2005 Gwynneth Here they are. Don’t take anything personally Every school year is a code. House (Allard House) graduate that Always do your best series of moments that are Agreement 1 - Be impeccable Lesson 2 – Don’t make sticks with me. If we can do what Ms. with your word. assumptions. woven together to forge Weinberg does, and live by During our travels Amy Weinberg, ”Speak with integrity.” – Ruiz writes. memories that last a lifetime. our Alumni Relations Manager – yes, these four simple Agreements “Say only what you mean. Avoid using Agreement 3 - Don’t take she’s the ’05 Gwynneth graduate that transcend generations the word to speak against yourself or anything personally. I am fortunate to see the stories of that I’m speaking of – shared the and time, we will have a to gossip about others. Use the power ”Nothing others do is because of today that are written by our students lessons of Don Miguel Ruiz. Hailing good chance of enjoying the of your word, instead, in the direction of you” – he says. “What others say and listen to the stories of the past from Mexico, Ruiz is the youngest wonders of Brentwood and the truth and love.” and do is a projection of their own that are shared by the Old Brentonian of 13 children - Happy Mother’s Day wonders of the world. reality, their own dream. When we community. Most often there are indeed! He worked his way through Every day we make promises - are immune to the opinions and To all students, staff, parents, timeless lessons imbedded in these school to become a surgeon and was sometimes to others and, most often, actions of others, we won’t be the past parents and Old reflections. I shared one of these stories living a simple and happy life. In 1997 to ourselves. We are then empowered victim of needless suffering.” Brentonians, thank you for during the 2019 Closing Ceremonies things suddenly changed, he had his to make or break these promises. Our At times, we all have overpowering sharing your stories and lessons that I believe is worthy of a place in Black Swan moment - a near fatal car choice impacts how others view us or egos that push us to think that with me. the Brentonian accident caused how we view ourselves. the world revolves around us. “No one urged us to accept it as a gift to help us Thank you Brentwood for making 2018- Magazine. him to rethink his When broken, people are put into the has it tougher than me. My issues are improve. that 180 degree reframing is 19 a year full of wonders, lessons and As part of our priorities, values unreliable, disingenuous, and big talker “We don’t need a teacher, far more important than yours.” This what Ruiz is referring to - Don’t take it agreements. Old Brentonian and lifestyle. bucket. If promises are kept, however, houseparent, art instructor, coach, trick can move us into pity party mode personally and instead accept it as a gift. engagement you are seen as someone who delivers. It is an honour to serve such a special advisor or parent to tell us that He recalibrated and we begin to take even minor bits of community. strategy, for his philosophical As someone that will get the job done. we’re not performing our BEST. The feedback personally. A recent study of The Final Agreement 4 - Always the first time in As someone who can be trusted.