EDUCATIONAL IDENTITY FORMATION AND TRANSFORMATIONS: LIFE-HISTORY ANALYSIS OF FIRST-GENERATION, ADULT COLLEGE STUDENTS by NATALEE DANEA TUCKER Bachelor of Science in Human Development and Family Studies Kansas State University Manhattan, Kansas 1994 Master of Science in Human Development and Family Studies University of Missouri–Columbia Columbia, Missouri 1998 Master of Liberal Arts Baker University Baldwin City, Kansas 2006 Submitted to the Faculty of the Graduate College of the Oklahoma State University in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the Degree of DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY July, 2014 EDUCATIONAL IDENTITY FORMATION AND TRANSFORMATIONS: LIFE-HISTORY ANALYSIS OF FIRST-GENERATION, ADULT COLLEGE STUDENTS Dissertation Approved: Jean Van Delinder Dissertation Adviser J. David Knottnerus Tamara L. Mix Lucy Bailey ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS My paternal grandmother often told me stories about her childhood in the small, rural town of Osage City, Kansas. In one such story, Grandma recalled making a trip to the local library to check out several books. Clutching the new books, she stood in front of the librarian eager to check out and carry these treasures home. The librarian slowly lifted each book, examining the titles. Then, the librarian looked down at my grandmother, examining her. “This book is not for girls,” the librarian flatly pronounced. Grandma did not remember the title of the book she wanted to read, but her description of the confusion, hurt, and anger the statement produced in her was vivid and real. When my grandmother related this memory to me, I could see the anger behind her blue, watery eyes. I could also see the hurt. She was affected by this brief interaction even 50 years afterwards. When one hears that something is “not for her” the message causes moments, or a lifetime, of doubt. Even if one does not believe the message, the meaning continues to nag at our consciousness. Grandma decided to sneak the book out of the library the next time she was there. Her resistance seems small and personal, but in reality, like all acts of resistance, it was large and important. Her act of defiance and her telling of this story impacted my educational trajectory and ultimately the completion of this dissertation. For this reason, I dedicate this dissertation to my grandmother, Bettie Jean Nelson Tucker. I continue to be awed and inspired by the stories of those who are the first in their family to attend college and those who attend college as adults. Their bravery, commitment, and passion continue to motivate me. My hope is that this dissertation honors these students and their life stories. I owe gratitude to many people who impact my life in significant ways. I credit Ms. King, my high school teacher, for influencing my decision to attend college. She showed me a letter from the department of Human Development and Family Studies on Kansas State letterhead and suggested that I “check it out.” Deborah Kay Dickinson Marszalek has seen me through it all – grade school, middle school, high school, college, graduate school, life. Thank you for always being there, sister. Finally, my husband, my partner, my love, Chad Eric Taylor, you have opened up ideas and worlds that I did not believe existed. I traveled around the world and back again, only to find that what I was looking for was in Oklahoma all along. Thank you for loving me. When I began this endeavor, I hoped to make a difference, however small, in the educational lives of others. This goal has become more personal with the birth of my son, Atom Nelson Taylor, who shows me everyday that all children are born artists, scientists, and visionaries. I never want you, or any other child, to loose your natural curiosity and wonder. You challenge and inspire me to continue my own educational journey. Thank you. iii Acknowledgements reflect the views of the author and are not endorsed by committee members or Oklahoma State University. Name: NATALEE DANEA TUCKER Date of Degree: July, 2014 Title of Study: EDUCATIONAL IDENTITY FORMATION AND TRANSFORMATIONS: LIFE-HISTORY ANALYSIS OF FIRST-GENERATION, ADULT COLLEGE STUDENTS Major Field: Sociology Abstract: The purpose of this qualitative research was to explore how educational identities were formed and transformed within educational institutions over the lifespan and how the identities were related to decisions about education. Cultural (re)production theories provided the framework for analyzing the ways which inequality was reproduced through social institutions, specifically educational institutions. This research utilized a life- history approach to explore the educational identities of first-generation, adult students enrolled in the first year of an associate degree program at an urban, multi-campus community college in the Midwest. The life-history narratives revealed that schools are important sites where students interpret messages about who they are within educational institutions. These messages form educational identities that impacted educational decision-making. Educational identities were not fixed, but transformed over time. For the participants in this study, distressing early educational experiences contributed to the formation of educational identities that were disengaged, self-critical, and dejected. These educational identities contributed to the students’ decisions not to attend college directly after high school. Later in life, life circumstances pushed first-generation, adult students to consider enrolling in college. Educational identities formed during early schooling shaped initial emotions about returning to school. Students discussed cognitive and behavioral strategies they used to overcome self-doubts related to educational identities and features of the community college environment that enabled transformation of educational identities. The findings have implications for cultural (re)production theories and school reforms related to educational inequality, including student engagement and college enrollment stratification. iv TABLE OF CONTENTS Chapter Page I. INTRODUCTION ...........................................................................................................1 Background and Context..........................................................................................2 Problem, Purpose, and Research Questions .............................................................5 Researcher Background and Assumptions...............................................................7 Research Design.......................................................................................................8 Rationale and Significance ....................................................................................11 Definitions of Key Terminology ............................................................................15 Organization of the Dissertation ............................................................................17 II. REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE ..............................................................................18 Cultural (Re)production Theories .........................................................................19 Insights from Feminist Theory ..............................................................................29 College Enrollment Stratification .........................................................................33 First-generation College Students .........................................................................39 College Access and Achievement .............................................................40 Family Background and Culture ...............................................................43 First-generation, Adult College Students ..............................................................46 Adult College Students .........................................................................................48 Adult Student Role Strain .........................................................................49 Adult Student Identity within the College Environment ..........................51 Early Educational Experiences and Identity .........................................................54 Summary ................................................................................................................60 III. METHODOLOGY .....................................................................................................62 Theoretical Rationale for Research Design ...........................................................63 Research Participants .............................................................................................67 Research Design Overview ....................................................................................70 Data-Collection Methods .......................................................................................72 Data Analysis and Synthesis ..................................................................................74 Ethical Considerations ...........................................................................................78 Trustworthiness ......................................................................................................79 Methodology Challenges .......................................................................................81 Summary ................................................................................................................85 v IV. FINDINGS PART I: EARLY EDUCATIONAL EXPERIENCES, EDUCATIONAL IDENTITIES,