NOVEMBER 2017 | VOLUME 28 | ISSUE 9 THERAPY TODAY Those tears should be mine, shouldn’t they Page 31 The voice of the counselling and psychotherapy profession WHO’S PULLING THEIR STRINGS? NOVEMBER 2017, VOLUME 28, ISSUE 9 The corrosive effects of coercive control Working at relational depth // Therapist and journalist – confronting the ethical challenges Emotional burnout – the cost of compassion // Can counselling help people with dementia? Welcome I first heard the term Editor’s note ‘compassion fatigue’ The United Nations has designated 25 November when used to explain International Day for the Elimination of Violence a dramatic drop in against Women. It also marks the start of a 16-day period of activism against all gender- charitable giving just based violence. We are all invited to ‘orange the after Live Aid. world’, using the colour of the UN campaign to Apparently, the public couldn’t symbolise a brighter future without violence. bear to look at any more footage of This campaign influenced our decision to the human fallout of famine, war and commission an article on coercive control for disease. Maybe they were self-caring? this month’s issue. Coercive control is a relatively Emotional burnout is particularly new crime, in terms of UK law, but an age-old difficult for therapists and still widely misunderstood, pernicious form because working with of violence, inflicted, largely, by men on women, feelings and caring for within intimate relationships. But it is also found in other arenas, and used others is why we chose by women too – in cults, for example, and in modern-day slavery, and, this profession in the indeed, in parent–child relationships, work situations and others where first place. As Dr Linda one person exerts power over others through emotional manipulation Dubrow-Marshall points and threat. As the authors of the article point out, such clients are very out in our cover feature, likely to come to counselling for some quite other reason, and it’s vital that ‘There can be shame in counsellors are alert to the potential for this to be an underlying issue. admitting that we are We have some very interesting letters this month in response to the experiencing compassion fatigue, articles in last month’s issue on the closure of the counselling courses but we are human, and we are not at the University of East Anglia and prescribed drug dependency. The protected from stress just because letters pages are your forum for engaging with issues that concern you we have therapeutic skills.’ and adding to the debates. I know a lot of discussion goes on outside the I too have felt this way. Now, if I look magazine, on Twitter and in Facebook groups, but do please write to us at my diary and have to steel myself as well. for the week ahead, I know I need to Catherine Jackson decrease my client hours when I can, Editor increase my self-care and take a break asap. And breathe... 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(1 January to 31 December 2016) THERAPY TODAY 3 NOVEMBER 2017 Contents November 2017 Here and now News 6 News feature 8 The month 12 Letters 16 The big issues What can I possibly achieve? 20 Sonia Khan describes the challenges and rewards of working with people with dementia When your life is not your own 24 Linda Dubrow-Marshall and Rod Dubrow-Marshall outline the corrosive effects of coercive control Meeting at relational depth 28 Mick Cooper asks if we are any closer to understanding relational depth On the sporting couch 34 20 Gary Bloom combines his roles of therapist NICK LOWNDES/IKON IMAGES LOWNDES/IKON NICK and journalist in his radio show ‘Here was a dignified woman in her early 80s, desperately Regulars Turning point 33 holding on to herself, camouflaging Wisdom from experience deficits of memory, bewildered and Research into practice 38 Liddy Carver highlights research on the challenges frustrated, struggling to understand facing university counselling services what was happening to her. In time, Dilemmas 40 The police want to see Ruth’s client records I answered my own question about Talking point 42 what I could achieve.’ What qualities do you seek in a supervisor? Self-care 44 Sonia Khan meets her first client with dementia, at the start of a journey of profound learning Lynne Barnett turns to photography for stress release Analyse me 74 Graham Music answers our questionnaire NOVEMBER 2017 | VOLUME 28 | ISSUE 9 THERAPY TODAY Those tears should be mine, shouldn’t they Pe 31 The voice of the counselling and psychotherapy profession Your association From the Chair 45 BACP round-up 46 On the cover.. Classified, mini ads, recruitment, CPD 51 Unloving bonds What are the signs that WHO’S PULLING THEIR RINGS? a client may be subject to NOVEMBER 2017 VOLME 2 SSE The corrosive eff ects of coercive control the corrosive effects of coercive control? Working at relational depth // Therapist and journalist – confronting the ethical challenges Emotional burnout – the cost of compassion // Can counselling help people with dementia? Company limited by guarantee 2175320 Page 24 Registered in England & Wales. Registered Charity 298361 01 COVER-NOVv7-cj SM V1-cjf.indd 1 30/10/2017 10:27 This is your journal. We want to hear from you. [email protected] THERAPY TODAY 5 NOVEMBER 2017 In the news Our monthly digest of news, updates and events Gender identity concern Attempts to change people’s gender are indicators of a mental disorder’. It identity through psychological also commits the signatories to work interventions are unethical, potentially together to address the wider issues harmful and not supported by evidence, of raising public and professional leading psy-organisations and LGBTQI awareness of the risks of conversion groups have said. therapy, ensuring all new and existing The groups, including BACP, UKCP, therapists have training in these issues, Pink Therapy, the Association of Christian and ensuring that the research evidence Counsellors, the British Psychoanalytic relating to reparative therapy is regularly Council and the British Psychological monitored and reviewed. Society, have amended their original Andrew Reeves, Chair of BACP, said: Memorandum of Understanding (MoU) ‘BACP in no way supports or condones on conversion or reparative therapy the practice of conversion therapy and (November 2015), which referred only knows that the new memorandum will to sexual orientation. The revised MoU ensure individuals are protected from specifically