PRESIDENT FOR LIFE “NARRATIVE HISTORY” AMOUNTS TO FABULATION, THE REAL STUFF BEING MERE CHRONOLOGY Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1882 January 30, Monday: Henry Whitney Bellows died in New York City. Franklin Delano Roosevelt was born near Hyde Park. NOBODY COULD GUESS WHAT WOULD HAPPEN NEXT Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1884 October 11, Saturday: Anna Eleanor Roosevelt was born at 56 West 37th Street in New York City, daughter of the “swells” Elliott Roosevelt and Anna Hall Roosevelt. NOBODY COULD GUESS WHAT WOULD HAPPEN NEXT Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1904 January 30, Saturday: On his 22d birthday, Franklin Delano Roosevelt graduated from Harvard College. He would enter Columbia Law School. LIFE IS LIVED FORWARD BUT UNDERSTOOD BACKWARD? — NO, THAT’S GIVING TOO MUCH TO THE HISTORIAN’S STORIES. LIFE ISN’T TO BE UNDERSTOOD EITHER FORWARD OR BACKWARD. Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1905 March 17, Friday: Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Anna Eleanor Roosevelt got married in New York City. Students at the Moscow Conservatory took a vote of solidarity with Moscow musicians and workers. Albert Einstein published “On a heuristic viewpoint concerning the production and transformation of light” in Annalen der Physik (in this he showed that energy was made up of localized units he termed “quanta”). Incidental music to Maeterlinck’s play Pelléas et Mélisande by Jean Sibelius (translated by Gripenberg) was performed for the initial time, at the Swedish Theater, Helsinki, and was directed by the composer. THE FUTURE IS MOST READILY PREDICTED IN RETROSPECT Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1908 Dr. David Fairchild of the US Department of Agriculture gave cherry saplings to boys from each District of Columbia school to plant in their schoolyard for the observance of Arbor Day. In closing his Arbor Day lecture, Dr. Fairchild for the first time expressed an appeal that the “Speedway” (the present day corridor of Independence Avenue SW, in West Potomac Park) be transformed into a “Field of Cherries.” In attendance was Eliza Scidmore, whom Dr. Fairchild characterized as a great authority on Japan. The Swiss discovered that only 55% of their men without a regular exercise program were likely to come up to military entrance standards. Japanese military doctors doing research on the island of Okinawa established that the karate students there were physically more fit than Okinawans in general. Because of studies such as these, various governments around the world would begin to sponsor physical training in public schools — but Japan would not be in the forefront of this effort. Although in England the professional wrestler Sada Kazu Uyenishi was teaching soldiers at Aldershot and Shorncliffe Camp, the Japanese officer caste was not interested in encouraging their enlisted men to become experts at karate, possibly because when struck by an officer (as frequently did happen), such soldiers might be tempted to strike back, and might get the upper hand. Franklin Delano Roosevelt wrote that he regarded a war between the USA and Japan as an inevitability. “We have the Philippines and they need the Philippines,” he reasoned plausibly. Sooner or later, the Japanese will try to bolster up their power by another war. Unfortunately for us, we have what they want most, the Philippines.... When it comes, we will win over Japan, but it will be one of the most disastrous conflicts the world has ever seen. (Hey, gentle reader, I got a question for ’ya. A guy who believes stuff like the above — exactly how hard is he going to work to preserve the peace? Is struggling to preserve world peace going to be his locofocus? –Or, instead, is said wiseass going to be carefully manipulating and fine-tuning and sharp-penciling the conditions under which this inevitable foreseen war is to begin in order to reassure himself as to the conditions under which said grand-powers world-historical struggle will come to its completion? In particular: is he likely to be caught napping, after a number of decades of such grand scheming, by one or another “sneak attack”? Seriously, now.) DO I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION? GOOD. Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1910 November 8, Tuesday: Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who regarded war with Japan as inevitable, was elected to the New York Senate. THE FUTURE CAN BE EASILY PREDICTED IN RETROSPECT Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1914 September 7, Monday: It was generally believed that the frigate USS Constellation then in existence was the identical one that had been launched in Baltimore in 1797! The minor detail, that that famous vessel which had defeated the French frigates Insurgente and Vengeance had been broken up in 1853 at the Gosport Navy Yard in Portsmouth, Virginia as irreparable, and had then been replaced by an entirely new ship built to an entirely new design, had been erased from people’s general accounts of things. Acting Navy Secretary Franklin Delano Roosevelt therefore ordered that she be restored so that she would appear “as she appeared in 1814” (four HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT decades before she was built). To minimize costs, the workmen were instructed to “include only such general details as would be noticed by the layman.” They fabricated some cannon for her at the Boston Navy Yard (presumably these were “Quaker cannon” fabricated out of tree-trunks painted black). They stuffed some old sail coverings they had lying around with straw to make it seem as if they had cotton sails inside of them, and they ripped off an 1880s-era bridge platform, and they ripped off an 1890s deck housing, and so the Constellation was all faked up and ready for this publicity tour. Everybody knew the vessel was a fake but nobody understood how totally fake this all was. Towed to Baltimore harbor, it would be put on display on the anniversary of its namesake’s launching, September 7, 1797. WHAT I’M WRITING IS TRUE BUT NEVER MIND YOU CAN ALWAYS LIE TO YOURSELF Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1919 June 2, Monday: At the chateau St. Germain-en-Laye, Karl Renner’s delegation from Austria was handed a draft of the proposed peace treaty. A bomb blast in Washington damaged the homes of Attorney-General A. Mitchell Palmer and Secretary of the Navy Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Carlo Valdinoci, an associate of Nicola Sacco and Bartolomeo Vanzetti, presumably an anarchist, destroyed himself in his explosion, which damaged five other homes in the neighborhood. On this same day nine other bombs were exploding across the nation (only one other person, a chance bystander, being killed). At the newly founded Verein für Theater und Musikkultur in Frankfurt-am-Main, the 1st public concert devoted to the music of Paul Hindemith (works performed include the Piano Quintet op.7, the Violin Sonata op.11/1, the Viola Sonata op.11/4 and the String Quartet op.10; the composer himself performed as violist for the quartet and quintet, and as pianist for the two sonatas). CHANGE IS ETERNITY, STASIS A FIGMENT Franklin Delano Roosevelt “Stack of the Artist of Kouroo” Project HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1914 July 29, Wednesday: As the German navy began to mobilize, Chancellor Theobald von Betthman Hollweg made an offer to British Foreign Minister Sir Edward Grey. If Britain were to remain neutral, Germany would pledge not to annex any of mainland France. Austro-Hungarian artillery began shelling across the Danube River into Belgrade, the Serbian capital. Gabriel Fauré wrote to his wife from Ems, Germany that the political situation was so “very grave” that he had decided to return home. Russian mobilization was ordered. A spectacular parade of ships led by the excursion steamer Rose Standish set sail in the late morning from New Bedford harbor for the official opening of the Cape Cod Canal. The Rose Standish was followed by the destroyer McDougall carrying then assistant secretary of the navy Franklin Delano Roosevelt, followed in turn by seven magnificent yachts led by project financier Augustus Belmont’s Scout. Six more destroyers escorted the flotilla to the approach channel entrance off Wing’s Neck, where two revenue cutters and two submarines were standing by, along with hundreds of smaller craft. The 1st transcontinental telephone link was established, between New York City and San Francisco. HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1921 July 29, Friday: In Germany, Adolf Hitler became Der Führer of the Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei (National Socialist German Workers’ Party, or NSDAP), the “Nazi” Party. WORLD WAR II During this year, Franklin Delano Roosevelt was being stricken with polio at Campobello. For the remainder of his life he would be unable to walk unaided. During this year, Benito Mussolini was entering the Italian parliament as a right-winger. HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1924 September 26, Friday: Franklin Delano Roosevelt resigned as Secretary of the Navy in order to run for governor of the State of New York. HDT WHAT? INDEX FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT 1928 Duce Benito Mussolini’s life story up to this point was offered to the English-reading public as MY AUTOBIOGRAPHY, in a translation by former US Ambassador to Italy Richard Washburn Child.