University of Montana ScholarWorks at University of Montana Graduate Student Theses, Dissertations, & Professional Papers Graduate School 2012 Down Low Under the Big Sky Amee Marie Schwitters The University of Montana Follow this and additional works at: https://scholarworks.umt.edu/etd Let us know how access to this document benefits ou.y Recommended Citation Schwitters, Amee Marie, "Down Low Under the Big Sky" (2012). Graduate Student Theses, Dissertations, & Professional Papers. 337. https://scholarworks.umt.edu/etd/337 This Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Graduate School at ScholarWorks at University of Montana. It has been accepted for inclusion in Graduate Student Theses, Dissertations, & Professional Papers by an authorized administrator of ScholarWorks at University of Montana. For more information, please contact [email protected]. DOWN LOW UNDER THE BIG SKY By Amee Marie Schwitters MPH, New Mexico State University, Las Cruces, NM, 2005 BA – Anthropology, Washington State University, Pullman, WA, 2003 Dissertation presented in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctorate in Anthropology The University of Montana Missoula, MT May 2012 Approved by: Sandy Ross, Associate Dean of The Graduate School Graduate School Richard Sattler, Chair Anthropology Annie Sondag Health and Human Performance Bryan Cochran Psychology Gregory Campbell Anthropology Kimber Haddix McKay Anthropology Schwitters, Amee, PhD, Spring 2012 Anthropology Down Low Under the Big Sky Chairperson: Richard Sattler Often synonymous with the rural environment is a sense of a heteronormativity and pervasive homophobia. Despite stories of gay men fleeing rural, conservative areas for larger, more accepting cities, not all men have chosen to leave. Some have chosen to quietly maintain their identity, modifying their sexual schemata in response to the desire to stay within the rural environment. It is known that homophobia and stigmatization of same-sex sexual acts regulate a person’s ability to be open about their sexual encounters, but exactly how they influence the daily lives of down low (DL) men who have sex with men (MSM) remains unknown. Influenced by schema theory and informed by queer theory, the current study investigated the role of the rural environment in shaping men’s decisions to remain on the DL about their same-sex sexual activity and the impact of that decision on daily life. It sought to understand the influence of the rural environment on men’s decisions to not be out about their same-sex sexual identity and in turn how that decision influenced sexual risk behavior and HIV prevention. The data gathered during semi-structured qualitative interviews with forty-five self-identified closeted men living in Montana was analyzed using a modified grounded theory approach. Several reasons for remaining closeted emerged and the level that each man was affected by his decision to remain closeted differed. Overarching themes of isolation and depression emerged from men feeling as if they had no choice, but to remain closeted while living in a rural environment. For many, homosexuality is still viewed in direct contrast to traditional ideals, leaving many men questioning how to maintain their place within the rural social environment. As Gerard Wright states, “being gay in ‘cowboy country’ similarly involves tactics of sexual camouflage: To be gay in western states such as Colorado, Wyoming, Nebraska, and Montana is to know when and how to ‘butch-up’ or ‘cowboy-up.” One means of maintaining this sense of “camouflage” adopted by rural men is to remain on the DL about their same-sex sexual activity. A desire for increased social support and a more accepting social environment emerged from this research. ii DEDICATION To the 45 brave men who made this dissertation possible. Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope… and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. - Robert F. Kennedy iii Acknowledgements This dissertation would not have been possible were it not for the forty-five men who stepped forward and took part in it. Thank you to the men who allowed me to interview them. The interviews were personal and often included men’s innermost thoughts and private details of their lives. The internal strength that these men possessed continues to inspire me today. The strength of this work comes largely from the depth and richness of the men’s stories. Carl, thank you for your continued conversations, company, and feedback. You’ve kept me on my toes. In addition to the men that were interviewed, I would also like to acknowledge the two men who helped recruit a few of the interviewees. Rick Holman and DJ Svetich – thank you for help not only with recruitments, but also for your support and encouragement. To Laurie Kops – thank you for being you. Your mix of pessimism and optimism is uniquely you. Thank you for your support and believing in this project from the beginning. This dissertation would not have been possible if it were not for the support and encouragement of Dr. Annie Sondag. Thank you for taking in a lost graduate student who wandered over to your office one fall day. Your support and encouragement when others doubted the ability to access closeted men was an enormous source of motivation. Thank you for the introduction to the CPG and for your mentorship. You not only changed my graduate school experience, but you have positively impacted my life. Thank you Annie! To my advisor and dissertation chair, Dr. Dick Sattler – thank you. At a time when I questioned my decision to return to school and complete my doctorate your iv enthusiasm, encouragement, and infectious laugh was one of the main reasons I forged on. You caused me to soon forget my doubts. Thank you for your support while I was working on this dissertation and for all of your invaluable comments and time given up while proof reading it. Finally, thank you for your help in naming this project. To my remaining committee members, Dr. Bryan Cochran, Dr. Greg Campbell, and Dr. Kimber Haddix-McKay, thank you for your support and feedback during the writing, proposal, and defense process. Dr. Cochran – thank you for your introduction to the Outness Inventory. To my friends and family – thank you for your love and support. Thank you for being there despite my frequent absences. Thank you to my partner for picking up all of “the slack” that life brings along with it while I often disappeared to write. To Kellan and Kara, thank you for reminding me of the importance of laughter in the journey of life. You make everything worthwhile. Here’s to the next adventure! v Abstract Often synonymous with the rural environment is a sense of a heteronormativity and pervasive homophobia. Despite stories of gay men fleeing rural, conservative areas for larger, more accepting cities, not all men have chosen to leave. Some have chosen to quietly maintain their identity, modifying their sexual schemata in response to the desire to stay within the rural cultural environment. It is known that homophobia and stigmatization of same-sex sexual acts regulate a person’s ability to be open about their sexual encounters, but exactly how they influence the daily lives of down low men who have sex with men (MSM) remains unknown. Influenced by schema theory and informed by queer theory, the current study investigated the role of the rural environment in shaping men’s decisions to remain on the down low about their same-sex sexual activity and the impact of that decision on daily life. It sought to understand the influence of the rural environment on men’s decisions to not be out about their same-sex sexual identity and in turn how that decision influenced sexual risk behavior and HIV prevention. The data gathered during semi-structured qualitative interviews with forty-five self-identified closeted men living in Montana was analyzed using a modified grounded theory approach. Several reasons for remaining closeted emerged and the level that each man was affected by his decision to remain closeted differed. Overarching themes of isolation and depression emerged from men feeling as if they had no choice, but to remain closeted while living in a rural environment. For many, homosexuality is still viewed in direct contrast to these traditional ideals, leaving many men questioning how to maintain their place within the rural social environment. As Gerard Wright states, “being gay in vi ‘cowboy country’ similarly involves tactics of sexual camouflage: To be gay in western states such as Colorado, Wyoming, Nebraska, and Montana is to know when and how to ‘butch up’ or ‘cowboy up.” One means of maintaining this sense of “camouflage” adopted by rural men is to remain on the down low about their same-sex sexual activity. A desire for increased social support and a more accepting social environment emerged from this research. This dissertation provides a voice for men previously excluded from the literature on rural sexual minorities. It provides insight into men’s everyday life experiences stemming from feelings of having to remain closeted about a part of their personal identity. This dissertation seeks to contribute to the literature on rural gay lives. vii Table of Contents Acknowledgements.……………………………………………………………………. iv Abstract……………………………………………………………………………...…...vi