0 DOCUIENT NEMER ED '14.8..355 1111 005 111166 A t AUTHOR 'Buel, Sue; Hosfordi, Charles Ttiziag Interpersonal, Communications Works hop. ., 'INSTITUTpli Ngrthwest regional Educational Lab., Portland,... ore g. * 4 PUB DATE, .Jul 12 . NOTE 83p..; Several piges have nar4inal. legibility. EDRS PRICE . 4I r-$0:83.tic-$11.67 Plus Postagi.', 0 DESCRIPTORS *Comatinication Skills; 'Instructional Biteriils; *Intercoismunicatiow; *Interpersonal Competence; *Interpersonal .12elationihip; -Librarians; Professional 0, .... Continuing Education: ASkill.Develop,nts. ' . 1 4. , Workshops a . 4 . ,- .. A ,.. 1 OSTRACT -- The major purpose, of anr .intrpersioaI communications waikshop is to provide participants the 'opportunity to Acquire knowledge andpractice skills in face-,to-tface.coimunidation, individual communicating Style, group and organixatiopal factors which affect communication, and continued improvement of individual communication skills.' The exercises in this document are designed for- use-by library personnek. in a,series of theory and.practice sessions on interpersonal communications. Topics includes (1) the degree of congruence between a person os intentions anti,-tbe effect produced,(2) paraphrasing ,(3) handling misunderstandings,(4) nonverbal behavior, (5) behavior description, (6) defensive communication, (7),. description of feelings, (8) emotional states,(9) feedback, (10) ,.. interpersonal effect, (11) matching behavior, (12). norms, (13) grotp processes;(14) .goals, and (15) power wand infludnce. Mr . ' . .2* . , *******************************************************o*************** * Documents acquired by ERIC in6lude many informal -unVublished * 'of materials not available from other sources. ERIC makes every effort * 1 * to obtain the best copy available. Nevertheless, items of marginal* * reproducibility are often encountered and this affects the quality * * of the microfiche and hardcopy reproductions ERIC makes available * $ *.Via the ERIC Document Reproduction Service* (EDRS). EDRS is ,not' or ,1,* responsible fm the quality of the original document. Retkroductions * 4, supplied by EDRS'Nare the best that c`-'-.n be made frou the original. * *********************************p******,****************************** 1. .. ..". 0 . °. ...,. * !1 ,I 4 \ .$ A 7' us DEPARTMEN i OF NEALTN. EDUCATION & WELFARE b NATIONAL INSTITUTE OF 0 EDUCATION . :I. TOMS DOCUA4Ey4-sHAS. 13EEk REPRO. :' MICE 0 exAc.rve AS R EC eivo -FROM I . THE PERSdN OR cm GmatzAslog oriGIN , . APING IT POINTS OF VIEW ORoomooNs STATED 00 NOT NECESSARILY REPRE SENT OFFICIAL NATIONAL INSTItUIE OF EDUCATION PISSIVON OR POLICY , , . 4 . INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS WORKSHOP .....% ft 7 , O . I 4. t. r A iS O ts O /- -.Sge Buil: ' Choles Hosford . 5 . Continuing Edubition Program for Library Pikonnel Dr. Peter Hiatt, Director r's , . e* . Western Interstatq CommissiOn for Higher Education P.O. Drawer P, Boulder, Colorado80302 4 s. Materials selected from o Interpersonal Communications Northwest Regional, Educational Laboratory Lindsay Building, 710 S.W. Second Avenue Portland, Oregon 97204 . fM 2 4 ,,2 e \ " I' . si O 1 4 4, 14, OT. r .t. ti ' `1. f 11 .r J. .c 1 .. , . 47 ... It 9 I , INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS 4 . 4 , © Copyright 1972 by the Northwest Regional Educational Laboratory - r 4 Northwest Regional Educational Laboratii;ry' LIndsaynuilding/719'S. W. Second Avenue Portland, Oregon. 97204 2 Jul 1972 3 Pub/isheo\by,the Northwest Regional Educational Laboratory, a private no4rofit-corporttion supported, in part asa regional educational laboratory by,fonds from the Unites States Offioe of Education, Department of Health, Woeit16n, aho Welfare. The opinions eApressed in this putlication do-not, necessarily 4eflept the position or poligy of the Office of Education, and no official. enoorsement by the Office of Education should be inferred. ii 3 k 'CONTENTS 'PREFACE, / . INTRODUCTION TO INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS _ ..... , 11- . % , . THE. INTERPERSONAL GAP, ., - ., f PARAPHRASING 11 -A Basic Communication Skill for Improving /fter0ersona1 Relationships". 'HANDLING-MISUNDERSTANDINGS 15 . It 4 WHEN TO USE A-SKILLIKE PARAPHRASING A 19 v. 'NONVERBAL BEHAVIOR d- 20' o " OwAviog DESCRIPTION ' 23 4, L'A Basic Communication ,Skill for Improvjhg 4.' InIerpersonal Relationships DEFENSIVE COMMUNICATION' 26 . -DESCRIPTION OF FEELINGS .37 A Bojc Communicatfon fdr-ImOroving - Inttrpersona1 Retatipiships , HOW.gMOTI6AL STATES EXPRESS THEMSELVES '38 TH4.01cEPTOV FEEDBACK 43 . THEINTERPERSONALEFFECT'OF VARIOUS RESPONS, 6 48 EMOTIONS AS' PROBLEMS' , 50 . 1* - MATCHING BEHAVIOR ' 52 WHAT IS ANORM? 54 FORMAL AND INFORMAL COMMUNICATION PATTERNS 57 WHATiO OBSERVE IN. A GROUP '. -59 / . A BIOR'S CATEGORIES '-'" ',, ' .. 64 SETTING GOALS FOR IMPROVEMENT .65 DEVELOPING.SUPPORT FOR CONTINU3USLEARNh1G 67. % POWERAND INFLUENCE 68 THE NELPINGRELATIONSNIP AND INTERVIEWING TECHNIQUES 70 ,. BLOCKING AND FACILITATING CbM410Q:JION 75 4. *4. 4 0 PREFACE,. " . purposes and Objectives .of the Worksh6p . % Th d major purposje of an interpersonal communications Otrksho) is to 4 6 4r-14' provid0 parrldipants the, opportunity Lc. acqqge knowledge and, to. practice C c% ,skills related to: ' , Face-to-face communication . , , '01. One's.own unique style of communicating Group,and organizational factors whicki.affeCt that czamunicatien el 'Continued improvement of one's communicAtion Skills.. -., innovations and changAs in librliy functions and roles.increased %he - - . ., need for colksbor4pion at all levels. In the traditional concept. ... lilraries, many librarians hlve carried out thett roles in relative. .) isolatiOn. AOW, in a search -for change'a.nd relevance, eduoa or S in general and librarians Jpecitically are concealed that effectth use of library resources not becurtailed due to issues of ihfluence, polarized conflict and ineffective communication. Increased interpersoIal . communications skills of library personnel will reduce at le'ast one 4 ; . 1 hindrance to local improvement efforts., - The theory and practice sessions aredesigned to be used in sequence and have a cumulative effett. Later sessions depend upon theskills gained and data.generated in previous activities; so attendanc e- throughout the I workshop is essential. The sequence of activities will provide three kinds. of learning, Participants will become more clear concerning things to know about iPterpersOnaI Communications. lie practices alternative ways to do things in interpersonal communications, and he becomes, able to recognize and develop uis own pefsonal style of,conununitating with others. Sue Ellen Buel v ..0 5 a. e , 2INTRODUCTIONTO INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATIONS This series of,exercises presents some basic things to know about interpersonal communications. Itis assumed you may already be somewhat -6MiliarWith many of these things. Even though we are.all involved'in 4 .._ ' . these things when we,communicate with, others, most of ,us don't give them. 'much attention. These exercises attempt to bring them more clearly into awareness so that you, as an individual,-can work at yr # skills in.communicating. Improving skills of communicating goes beyond simply' becoming more I clear about what you know.Therefore, each exercise includes opportunities to practice the behaviors which are described, to learn ways to recognize .. 4 4 - these behaviors,and to gain "feedback" from your partners about the ways yOu use these behaviors. The emphasis Of these exercises is on learning a , to communicate more effectively as opposed to knowingabout communicaticin. Many,skills in interpersonal communications involvethe personal style, , . of ,the individual.. For example, paraphrasi=ng involvesstating what yOu', heard someone say, then checking with him to be surd you understand what he meant by it. The exact behavior you use to do, thjs checking will O depend on your personal style. The important questions are whether you are clear about the ways you communicate and whether you are aware of the impact of your personal style of In short, thi series of exercises attempts 6 provide three kinds .. -ofscopportunity: (1) To become more clear about things you know about o 1 0 I . interpersonal communications; k2) To practice specific skills of interpersonal communication; (3) Td recognize more clearly your etk_jorla 4 style of interpersonal communications I a $ t 4 e to 4 6 4 I I 7 2 .4 ' . THE INTERPERSONAL GAP John L. Wallen . Yodr best intentions will You., cannot have,your own way all the time. sometimes end in disaster; Wile, at other'times, you w411 receive credit fer desirable outcomes you. didn't intend. In short, what you accomplish is Wotalways what you hoped. The most basic and recurring problem in social life is*the relation between whatyou intend and the effect oflo ur actions on others. The key terms we usein attempting to make sense of ierpersonal relations are . "intentions", "actions" an "effect". nriterpersonal gap"'refers to the degree of congruence between One person's intentions and the effect produced in the other. If the effect is wiiat was intended, the gap has been bridged. If the effect is the opposite of what was intended, the gap has become greater. Let us look more closely at the three terms. r The word "intentions" means the wishes, wants, hopes, desires, fears that give rise to actions. Underlying motivesof which you may be unaware are not.being referred to. It is a fact that people may say after an action has produced some result, "That wasn't what I meant to do. That outcome wasn't what I