JULY 22–AUGUST 4, 2021 ISSUE #387 THE INKWELL Bryce Parks Publisher & Everything Else [email protected] Kristina Nesteby Design & Layout [email protected] Mike Ironside Nightlife [email protected] Lisa Stevenson Advertising [email protected] 563-580-1691 Lori Menke Advertising COVER [email protected] 16 Dubuque County Fair 319-450-5151 The fair returns on July 27–Aug. 1 with two big grandstand concerts, stock car racing, CONTRIBUTING WRITERS demolition derby, and so much more Gwen Beatty Photo: Bob Felderman Good Advice 19 DubuqueFest Fine Arts Festival [email protected] Iowa’s longest-running fi ne arts festival hosts two days of a juried art fair, live Matt Booth music, and literary arts activities Mattitude Aug. 7 and 8 in Washington Park [email protected] Sara Carpenter FEATURES DIY Advice 18 ChamberFest DBQ [email protected] 23 Music on the March Danny Fairchild 31 Picture Yourself in the Tri-States Dining & Horoscopes [email protected] 32 Dockside Bar & Grille Bob Gelms SECTIONS Bob’s Book Reviews [email protected] 4 Events 12 Arts Pam Kress-Dunn Columnist 24 Nightlife [email protected] 32 Columnists Sunil Malapati Dining WHERE’S WANDO? [email protected] We’ve hidden Wando somewhere in this issue of Sara Eliot Steuer 365ink. Can you fi nd him? Feature Writer [email protected] 365ink Magazine SPECIAL THANKS 432 Bluff St, Dubuque, IA 52001 563-588-4365 Christy Monk, Gina Siegert, Julien’s Journal, Fran [email protected] Parks, Tim Brechlin, Gen. Bob Felderman, Ron & Dubuque365.com Jennifer Tigges, Dave Haas, Rich Belmont & Facebook: @dubuque365 Margie Blair, Mike Damaso, Paul Gilligan, Instagram: @365ink Paul & Sandy Meyer, Coco the offi ce dog, Wesley Cat, Copper Kettle’s Seared Sesame All contents © 2006–2021, Tuna Bowls, all of our 365ink friends and Community Incorporated. All rights advertisers… and you for reading. reserved. All bacon served semi-crispy. 2 365INK MAGAZINE JULY 22–AUGUST 4, 2021 ISSUE #387 DUBUQUE365.COM I want to talk about a very seri- man, that reminds me, I’m a shoo-in for ous issue that is coming up more and the old guys’ “look at my surgical scars” more, as we live in an aging society conversations. I’ll be king of the hill! in which baby boomers are retir- By the way, two years post-colon- ing while young people are not hav- cancer surgery, I just had my colonos- ing children at a pace to keep up. copy, and I’m good to go for another two As retirement approaches, or has years. Happy dance! Thanks to the 700 already passed, many of these boom- people who showed me some love on ers are choosing to live in communities Facebook when I gave that update. Wow! that are specifically designed for their So we started looking at homes. We needs. No, not retirement homes: I’m even started doing so pre-pandemic. talking about housing developments We put offers on more than one home with beautiful single-level living homes during that time, but nothing worked and duplexes, in which the homes are out. We gave up for a bit, and then, brand-spanking new, with all of the things every once in a while, Christy’s eyes working perfectly, with modern finishes will get big, and we’ll make poor and amenities. And the neighborhood John Gartner walk us through yet has an association that takes care of the another house that’s sold before we lawns and shoveling the driveways, and get out the back door of the tour. you pretty much don’t have to worry We went through a home the other about the hard stuff. S( ounds like renting day that just came on the market the instead of homeownership, doesn’t it?) night before. It was a cool architect- The reason this has become an issue of designed (piqued my architect wife’s discrimination is because, well, I want in! interest) mid-century modern house with Why can’t we come live in your aging single-level living possible and a man- community? We’re ready. We’re SO DAMN ageable yard. We got an appointment READY! Why must we have to be 55+? I to see it at 1 p.m. By the time we got the promise that on most days, Christy and appointment, just hours after it was put I both feel like a solid 62–68 on average. on the market, it had four offers submit- Speaking of average, our dog, Coco (the ted with one more on the way. What in miniature rescue wonder poodle), in dog the holy upside-down housing market years, is 91. So if we average out our three hell are we living in? We just gave up. ages, that’s 60, and we QUALIFY! And We’re not getting into a bidding war! he’s even quiet, and the neighbor ladies And then Christy sees this house for will all instantly fall in love with him. sale. It’s got “all of the things.” She’s going Why can’t we just come? We won’t through the dream house checklist and tell anyone. I’ll sell the Jeep and get yes… there’s that. And it has that and a Buick or something. We don’t even one of those. Two-car garage, single- own a stereo. I do have my band prac- level living, two bathrooms, a pantry, and tice in my basement, but that’s okay. laundry by the bedroom. Yes. Yes. Yes, It’s We’re awesome and don’t ever need less than $350,000. Double yes. SWEET to practice again. (Sorry, Kristina, the JESUS, what’s going on? Have we found band gear is going in your garage.) it?! Is this it? Big bucks, no whammies, Why can’t I just have what they have? and… STOP! 55+??? What the hell is 55+? Is I’ll bring my giant new pellet smoker, that a suggestion, or a rule? Wait. Wait, fair and we can grill enough ribs and brisket dream house. Do not go off into that good for the whole subdivision, and me and night. Do not give up without a fight. Rage! the old guys can stand around in our Rage against the contractual oversight. old-man black socks and sandals and I’ll deliver 365inks door to door! And talk about smoking meat and the proper- we don’t even need the use of the shared ties of smoking meat and occasionally community building space or the pool. It’s sports! It will be glorious! Yes, you can all yours. Could we opt out of the chemi- borrow our e-bikes, and we will borrow cals on our part of the lawn, though? Uh, your blood pressure monitor. Yes, I will oh, chink in the armor. And I don’t know open the jar for you! I’ll just sell the damn if we’ll survive political yard sign season, lawn mower and the power washer. Who but we will face that challenge when needs those anymore? Not us, neighbor! we come to it. Maybe these are hip and After my cancer battles a couple of progressive 55plus-ers. Either way, we can years ago, I decided a house with a lot be real quiet. You won’t even know we’re less “work” would be nice in the future. No there, aside from the cute dog and the more big hills to mow and… um... big hills delicious gill smoke. Whadda ya say? n to mow, etc. would be really lovely. Oh, DUBUQUE365.COM ISSUE #387 JULY 22–AUGUST 4, 2021 365INK MAGAZINE 3 EVENTS US Highway 20 Designated Medal of Honor Highway Handoff handing off the message from state to state by American Legion State Com- Ceremony manders. The Iowa Commander will SATURDAY, JULY 24 @ 6 PM receive the hand-off from Nebraska and DUBUQUE VETERANS MEMORIAL transport the message across Iowa. PLAZA (1801 ADMIRAL SHEEHY DR) Since the Medal of Honor was first The public is invited to join the State presented during the Civil War, 3,508 of Iowa American Legion Commander, awards have been issued with every state other American Legion dignitaries, and represented. As of Dec. 21, 2019, there the Legion Riders as the Iowa Com- were only 71 Medal of Honor recipients mander hands off the Medal of Honor to living in the United States of America. Illinois on Saturday, July 24 at 6 p.m. at To earn the Medal of Honor, a member the Dubuque Veterans Memorial Plaza. of the U.S. Armed Forces must act with The American Legion Post 6 of “conspicuous gallantry and intrepid- Dubuque will provide a complete color ity above and beyond the call of duty guard, a firing squad, a bulger, and Chap- during combat at the risk of one’s life lain. All other surrounding military groups against an enemy of the United States.” and veteran organizations have been As one of the oldest Posts in Iowa, invited to participate in the color guard. and with Dubuque as Iowa’s first city, US Highway 20 has been named a American Legion Post 6 of Dubuque Medal of Honor Highway, which pays hom- is proudly hosting the hand-off cer- age to the nation’s most heroic military. emony at the newly updated $3.2 million All of the states along the highway have Dubuque Veterans Memorial Plaza. made similar proclamations. In recog- For more information, contact Bob Fel- nition of this designation, a convoy is derman at [email protected] carrying the message coast-to-coast, or Tom Walsh at 563-663-5444.