",,~~w,;'~"""'''''~.<1''''-~"11,"' ''''<''''''''*'''\<~-'''''''''' . c£jJ,JlAJ:q lnlaiU ~i.li11J Volume 5 Number 1 September, 1986 elcome Back! Is all OK in the ROK? "$' A, Freshman Guide Beybnd Sid and Johnny ~ And More. ____.... ~.g.~.--..." t:> .., .. ~....-..,.,0l _-'-~"'''.i'''' '''':··'"''''''"'''<1_,· ' ·''''' '' · ·· page 2 THE MICHIGAN REVIEW September, 1986 ••.••••.••...••..•...•........' ........•.•.........................•.•...••.........•••...•••......•....•.•.•..•.•.•....•••.....••...•.•• Ire have a winner. .H 'e hal'e 111'0 winners gifi certificate. Besides, people are innocent in the Review's Crosslvord Puz zle ulltil proven guilty. To prOl'l' our adherencc Sweepstakes. The entries wer£' iden/ical 10 that principle, 11'(' will not he demamling §erpent's 000tll and. ill fact, cO nlained the same errors. It uril/analysis (!( ("omesla n!s. Ih is were a classroom, cheating might be JlIsl kidding. people. The ( H I'inners are suspected and we might follo w the old Ingrid Cu/lin o(Salinc and Chns / 'Iah os 01 adage "r(you spli[ the work you each gel {h e Biological Chl'mislr,r Departl/lcnt. 50 °1! (~rrhe grade " But i! would he difjiclIl! Lueh 11/11 recei)'/' u 55 .UO gdi eeni/i, ,;i, ' 10 properly splil a S5. 00 Sieve's Ice Crealll Ii-I'm .\1('\'('\ lee Cream The Cook County Review of moza was about to be overthrown, he ---- -----_._._----------- _ ._--_._-----_.- Michigan. never shut down La Prensa. This That's our new name. Publisher should help prove that no matter how ~~~ c;\A1N "'.... , ...... sU!<xf A\L4:.l Vogel has lived in Cook County, lillIe freedom there was under So­ Illinois (that's the one that contains moza, there is even less under the TAKE All OF rr BACK Chicago) for 20 years. Editor-in-Chief Sandinistas. 10 'ffiE t1\ANT, JAC\\. KJukoff, after hiding in Jersey for 20 'flt. CAN'T ~o THE years, has moved to Cook County, ** Thus, to bring our IIlinauseum c.AP\iAl <WN~L . ~ culture to the subpar state of Michi­ gan, here's the latest one from the The U-M Regents will soon con­ Windy City. Richard Daley (the son of sider rescinding a bylaw which allows the Dead One) has joined the move­ student groups that demonstrate suf­ ment for non-partisan mayoral elec­ ficient support from students to raise tions in an effort to dethrone Harold money through the registration pro­ Washington' s strategic advantage. cess. This bylaw is the one under Vrdolyak and Kelly are right now which PIRGIM was allowed to solicit plotting to team up with Daley and money from students through a stub Jane Byrne for the Big Battle at on the SVF. The issue comes up again Not-So-OK Corral. Stay tuned, it's because PIRGIM is seeking rein­ gonna be a tough one. statement to the SVF and claims to have 16,000 student petition signa­ ** tures in support of that request. PIRGIM used questionable tactics In further baseball news, former U in its petition drive. Many students . of M great, Barry Larkin, made his were not aware of what they were Sh?uld any ~roup, partIcularly a po- From the oops! department. Chief major league debut. Larkin was ori­ endorsing, in fact some thought that htical speCIal lOterest group, be Justice nominee, William Rehnquist. ginally scheduled to start, but due to they were signing to allow PIRGIM to granted advantageous status? In other was getting a lot of flack from several weather-related delays in his flight, he arrived in ' Cincinnati only half an ~~~~i~~~~s~~~! : ~~~~~f ~b~~rr~~ ;. ;~~~ .. :~~;:t~~~~~~~~~ .~·~~~ · ·· ;~a~~t\~vtk,~ ~~~ · 1f6h~~~~~~icW~~a ··;·· .. ,'" bour before game time; w.ithout any of "Sign for a stronger PIRGIM" ap- semI-offiCIal status denved from a deeds that included anti-Jewish or hIS equipment. Nevertheless, the proach used in the past, PIRGIM was stub on the SVF? anti-Black clauses. Then it was dis- shortstop-second baseman debuted, vague. Only students who thoroughly PIRGIM would claim that it de- covered that Senator Biden also had a making a pinch hitting appearance, questioned the petitioners or who serves an advantage due to its alleg- house with a similar deed. Case dis- while wearing Pete Rose's shoes. were already well-informed and read edly strong support. But ifPIRGIM is missed. Perhaps, Rose's greatness will rub off the petition carefully and critically so str~ngly supported by.stude~t~ then on Larkin. We hope. could be certain of understanding the there IS no need for fundl~g pnvlleges. ** ramifications of PIRGIM's proposal. Students .would gladly gIve PIRGIM ** In the past PIRGIM has been much money W1thout any SVF mechanism. In California, thirteen-year-old more honest and direct and thus has They would simply go to the PIRGIM Deanna Young attended a church The local primaries had an unusual received much less support. Also, it office or throw money in a PIRGIM lecture on drug abuse. Apparently, she incident. David Raaflaub, a chal­ should be noted that many of the bucket. Other stude.n.t organizations, took the lecture to heart. She turned in lenger to State Senator Lana Pollack students who signed the petition last mos~ much less political and contro- her parents for drug possesion, along in Democratic primary, challenged winter are no longer U-M students. verslal than PIRGIM, raise money with a trash bag containing some the State Senator to a mud wrestling PIRGIM has also resorted to mis- that way, and none of them are marijuana, a handgun, some pills, and match. Ms. Pollack naturally de­ leading statements regarding its clamoring for funding privileges. $2800 worth of cocaine. The question clined. But it would have been inter­ is, is this an isolated incident, or are funding sources. PIRGIM receives esting, to say the least teenagers actually that much more $300,000 per year from non-student * conservative than their parents? "citizen" donators, much much more The issue is one of fa irness. All ** than it ever hopes to rake in from groups should live by the same rules, During this past summer, the only U-M students. In a letter to the and if exceptions to the rules were to ** anti-Sandinista newspaper in Nicara­ Michigan Daily PIRGIM's Treasurer be made for anyone, they should be Here's one that you won't believe: gua, La Prensa , was shut down by the denied this, even though PIRGIM's made for non-political groups such as Did you know that Smiling Mike Sandinistas.-The excuse was that since budget is public knowledge. PIRGIM CARE or Students Against Drunk Gorbachev and Bill Cosby are COll­ the paper was opposed to the Sandi­ will do anything to maintain the Driving which arc striving to aei ieve sins? Really, they are, according to nistas. it must be funded by the CIA illusion that it is purely a student goals that most every student v, ~) uld Th e Natinnal Midnighl Star. or and tryi ng to o\'Crt hrow the govern­ orga ni zation. support. Lobbying groups v"'ith a clear something lih' that. ('(('s. even l1'e ment. Perhaps It was. Aside from the issue of PIRGIM's agenda such as PIRGIM should be the can't resist leTting our eyes slip P ~ls t In any case, before the 1979 revo­ tacti cs and the merits of PIRGIM's last to benefit from special treatment. the TV Guide on the line at Farmer lution, La Prensa was an anti-Som oza request to be granted fund raising The Regents should revoke their Jack's.)A.n yway, we are trying in vain newspaper. Ho\\'ever, even when So- privileges is the issue of fairness. fundrai si ng bylaw. to decide who is the real comedian. .... : n " , ....--- ..«""' '' ''''~ ~ ~ -<,- «........-""'-"". THE MICHIGAN REVlEW page 3 September, 1986 ...........•.........•.•.................•..............................•...............•..•.......•.........•........................... TIlE , ~ rom t11r i£ilitor MlCHlGIUf RIWIEW Publisher David A. Vogel Welcome Class A.ssociate publishers David Katz Joseph M. McCollum Editor-in-Chief Seth B. Klukoff Executive Editors of'90 Steve Angelotti Paul Sellman has to offer. Take time to examine the switched parties), No'rman Podhoretz A.dllertis;ng Director So why did you choose to attend such a large university? I am sUre plethora of student organizations, (Editor of Commentary), Carl Pursell Sharlene Prais cultural programs, political groups, (Our valiant Congressman), Harold Personnel MalUlgers most of you have been asked that question on numerous occasions. My publications, and musical events on Shapiro (You know who he is, and if Peter C. Cubba answer is that a university is only as campus. A walk across the Oiag will you do not, you will shortly), and AI Charles D. Lipsig reveal the vitality present at Michi­ McCarthyites-in-Chief large as perceived. A university may Haig (Former Secretary of State, cur­ contain many buildings, occupy a gan. Essentially, you should try to rent presidential candidate, and East Joseph Biden sizeable land area and have a student become an active participant in the Quad's honorary resident). Potential Edward Kennedy body of 40,000. (Not to mention a life of the university. Involvement in interviews for the upcoming year Justin Schwartz seemingly impenetrable bureaucracy). the university,' combined with suc­ include Edward Luttwak (Author of Staff These are physical characteristics of a cessful academic achievement, will Pentagon and the Art of War), Les Karen Kress Patrick Batcheller ultimately lead to greater personal Aspin (Congressman from Craig Brown Da vid Norquist large university. But one should not John Burch Paddie O'Hal/oran use these features as the sole bases for growth. Wisconsin), and Richard Lugar Debbie Buchholtz Mark Powell defining the educational experience. We at The Michigan Review wish (Senator from Indiana and Chairman Lori Burrington Scoll T Rickman To become intimidated by the su­ you success and fortune in all your of the Senate Foreign Relations C.