August 1990 Quaker Thought FRIENDS and Life OURNAL Today ON- THE WORD MARRIAGE QUAKERAMA ON INTERSTATE 80 GRASSROOTS- DISARMAMENT The Ministry of Laying Down Editor-Manager Among Friends Vinton Deming Associate Editor Melissa Kay E lliott Art Director Barbara Benton Every Nickel Counts Advertising Manager Timothy Back s soon as I saw it I knew this was just right for me. Circulation and Promotion Nagendran Gulendran You know, the sort of thing you can stick up on your refrigerator Trpesettlng Services A right next to the kids' art work, reminders of doctors' James Rice and Susan Jordhamo appointments, and important family notices. It was a green flyer sent to Secretarial Services Jeanne G. Beisel me at the office this spring, which caught my attention at once: "101 Bookk-per Green Things You Can Do." It starts out, "Green values can help build a James Neveil safer, healthier environment. .. '' Volunteers Jane Burgess, Eileen Coan, Anders Hansen I'm the sort of person who wants to improve things in the world, but I Emily Conlon, Catherine McCulley, Becky Young have trouble getting mobilized in the abstract. Statements such as "We've Board of Managers got to save the environment" really frustrate me. I just don't know how 1988-1991: Nancy Cocks Culleton, Barbara Dinhofer, Sam Legg (Clerk), Parry Jones, to start; the task seems too big and impossible, somehow. So a sheet with Richard Moses (Treasurer), Harry Scott, Larry 101 things to do-that's just what I needed. Spears, Judith Randall, Alan Walker, Ellie White This list isn't perfect, of course. #64 says, "Pick up litter along the 1989-1992: Jennie Allen (Secretary), Richard streets near your home." Well, with the state of litter where I live, if I Eldridge (Assistant Clerk), Bernard Haviland, Eric Larsen, Marcia Mason, J anet Norton, took this seriously I'd never be seen again; I' d have to sign on as a city David Samuel, Carolyn Sprogell, Wilmer sanitation worker. #89 says, "Support local hotel and restaurant Tjossem, Elizabeth S. Williams, Alice Wiser operations when you travel." I hardly ever go anyplace, and when I do I 1990-1993: Clement Alexandre, Marguerite Clark, Peter Eccles, Leonard Kenworthy, Lee try to stay with friends and carry my own food . And #94 says, "Divest Neff, Mary Ellen Singsen your stock holdings in companies that pollute." I don't have any stock, Honorary Managers Eleanor Stabler Clarke, Mildred Binns Young only kids and a house with a mortgage. But most of the list is great. Two items in particular grabbed my FRIENDS JOURNAL (lSSN 0016-1322) was established in 1955 as the successor to The attention. #51 says, "Turn off lights when they are not in use." And #74 Friend (1827-1955) and Friends lntelligencer reads, "Pass along ecological wisdom to your children." OK, I thought, (1844- 1955). It is associated with the Religious Society of Friends, and is a member of the here's the Green place to start. Associated Church Press. I should explain. My son, Simeon (now seven), has the bad habit of not • FRIENDS JOURNAL is published monthly by turning off the lights in his room when he goes out. No amount of Friends Publishing Corporation, 1501 Cherry lecturing about high electric bills and bad environmental policy and global St., Philadelphia, PA 19102-1497. Telephone (215) 241-7277. Accepted as second-class warming trends has done a lick of good. The lights just keep burning. So, postage paid at Hanover, PA 17331. with #51 and #74 firmly in hand, I took Sim aside for a heart-to-heart. • Subscriptions: one year $18, two years $34. Add $6 per year for postage to countries "Sim," I said firmly, "no more forgetting. The next time you go out and outside the U.S., Canada, and Mexico. leave the lights on, you owe me a nickel." This time I really meant it. Individual copies $2 each. Well, for the next week, old habits didn't change much. But then • Information o n and assistance with advertising is available on request. Appearance something happened. As the collection of nickels increased on top of my of any advertisement does not imply dresser, Sim began "thinking Green"-money, that is. Sim takes pride in endorsement by FRIENDS JOURNAL. the well-stuffed bank in his sock drawer, and he could tell he was about to • Postmaster: send address changes to FRIENDS JouRNAL, 1501 C herry St., go into debt unless the cash flow reversed. First the nickels began to slow, Philadelphia, PA 19102-1497 then they stopped completely. Try as I might, a dark room was all I ~ould • Copyright © 1990 by Friends Publishing Corporation. Reprints of articles available at find. nominal cost. Permission should be received Then one day, after passing his room, I encountered Sim in the hall. He before reprinting excerpts longer t han 200 had a big smile on his face, the kind that says "I know something you words. Available in microfilm from University Microfilms International. don't know." Without a word he pointed up the hall to my room, where several lights were blazing. With eyebrows raised he extended his palm in my direction. All I had in my pocket was a quarter, but I gave it to him. I have a suggestion: #102 should read, "Invest in our children. They are Moving? our future." Let us update (For a copy of the flyer "101 Green Things You Can Do," send $1 to your subscription Co-op America, 2100 M St., N.W., Suite 403, Washington, DC 20063. They'll send you five copies. And ask to be added to the mailing list to and address. receive their catalogue, too. It is excellent.) Write or call: FRIENDS JouRNAL, 1501 Cherry St., Philadelphia, PA 19102-1497 (215) 241 -7277 2 A ugust /990 FRIENDS JOURNAL August 1990 FRIENDS Volume 36, No. 8 JOURNAL Features Departments 8 Nagasaki: The Forgotten City 2 Among Friends Wilson E. Strand A broken clock records an act we must remember. 4 Forum VIewpoint 10 Grassroots Disarmament 5 John MacDougall 28 Ufe of the Meeting Citizen groups have an impact on Congress. 29 Reports 12 The Ministry of Laying Down 31 Bulletin Board Ralph David Samuel How may Friends improve the quality of their good works? 32 News of Friends Nonsense of the 14 Quakerama on Interstate 80 33 Wilmer Tjossem Meeting Look for exit 254 on your way through Iowa. 33 Young Friends 16 From Mary's Joumal 34 Books Mary Mikesell Did you say Jesus is coming to dinner! 37 Resources Milestones 18 Uving an Environmentally Sound 38 Ufe Style 40 Calendar Kathleen Geist and Amy Weber 41 Classified& Simplicity seems more relevant than ever. 42 Meetings 20 Some Questions Concemlng Marriage Poetry Rima M. Segal What is the role of meetings? 7 Maidens of 22 On the Word Afarrlage Hiroshima William M. Matchett Toge Sankichi Humpty Dumpty could not have said it any better. 2 1 Always Make Windows 25 The Marriage of John and Marshall Alice Mackenzie Swaim Leslie M. Hill It was a meeting of little silence and large stillness. 27 Plant Names Althea Postlethwaite Sea grapes, pepper grass, and star apples are special treats. Cover art by Signe Wilkinson F'RIENDs JoURNAL August 1990 3 The presence of God A Friend's concern The greatest paradox to the mystery of I am a bear of little brain. When existence is this: God's will is being messages come fast and furious in accomplished, with or without our help. meeting I become confused. I cannot roll God's will prevails, and there is nothing them about on the tongue of my soul anyone can do to alter the outcome. The and savor the subtle flavor of each word. genesis of all turmoil to which the human Friends need to consider bears like me condition is exposed (war, poverty, who need lots of silence-not because hatred, injustice) is the resistance of the your messages mean little to me, but collective, human will to the Divine will. because they mean much. God's will prevails, and there is Likewise, being a bear of little brain absolutely nothing to be done-except to means I must examine myself carefully stand with God, or to join the collective before I speak. Am I participating in a resistance of humanity against God. discussion or am I the conduit for an Empires and nations wiii rise and fall; irresponsible message that surprises me­ families will be sacrificed upon the altar coming from outside myself or from deep of materialism and selfishness; thousands within? Am I making a sociological upon thousands of innocent victims will observation, a political statement, or am be starved in poverty and slaughtered in "temple of the Holy Spirit." There's I speaking from my very essence? Could unimaginable wars-but to no avail. For nothing bad about that. Are you trying I make the same observation in a no amount of brutality or evil or to cover part of yourself? What part of paragraph in the newsletter? Would I savagery or vengeance on the part of you do you wish wasn't there? Can you bother submitting it? If not, should I be humanity's collective will can stay God's walk around the room as God made you, speaking it? How much of what I say is intervention. In the final analysis, this is calmly and with joy in this gift that's prologue? Is the last sentence of the essay the greatest curse to the force of human been given? In what way have you all that is really germane? Am I sinfulness: God will not be defeated.