Total Honesty/Total Heart: Fostering empathy development and conflict resolution skills. A violence prevention strategy by Marion Little BA Linguistics, University of Victoria, 2002 A Thesis Submitted in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree of MASTER OF ARTS in Dispute Resolution Marion Little, 2008 University of Victoria All rights reserved. This thesis may not be reproduced in whole or in part, by photocopy or other means, without the permission of the author. Supervisory Committee Total Honesty/Total Heart: Fostering empathy development and conflict resolution skills. A violence prevention strategy by Marion Christina Little BA Linguistics, University of Victoria, 2002 Supervisory Committee Dr. Sibylle Artz, School of Child and Youth Care Supervisor Dr. Tara Ney, Dispute Resolution Departmental Member Dr. Joseph Kess, Linguistics Outside Member ii Abstract Supervisory Committee Dr. Sibylle Artz, School of Child and Youth Care Supervisor Dr. Tara Ney, Dispute Resolution Departmental Member Dr. Joseph Kess, Linguistics Outside Member This research assesses the impact of a violence prevention training, Total Honesty/Total Heart , based on the Nonviolent Communication model (Rosenberg, 2003) for conflict resolution and empathy development (including self-empathy). This study offers a strategic response to adolescent aggressive/violent behaviour. The participants, aged 16-19, were all experiencing the stresses of poverty and marginalization at the time of the study, and were familiar with both domestic and peer violence. Some had received criminal charges, some were raising children, and all were struggling to complete high school. The research methodology is located within the traditions of educational research and program evaluation. Subsequently, this project combines a simple quasi- experimental pre-training and post-training written test (providing descriptive statistics) with qualitative data gathered through training sessions and interviews. A case illustration is included to further enhance the findings. This approach allowed a rich multi-dimensional analysis to be generated for such a small pilot project ( N=14). The test results showed a notable increase in skills comprehension and applications for the participant group, while the comparison group showed no increases. The participant group interviews revealed that the training had been engaging, and that the skills were practically applicable as well as meaningful. The case illustration revealed the transformative impact of integrating the Nonviolent Communication conflict resolution, empathy, and self-empathy skills into one participant’s life. In particular, this thesis suggests that self-empathy may be integral to supporting the development of conflict resolution skills specifically, and healthy relationships generally, for young women who have experienced abuse, trauma, and domestic violence. iii Table of Contents Supervisory Committee ...................................................................................................... ii Abstract ............................................................................................................................. iii Table of Contents ............................................................................................................. iv List of Tables ................................................................................................................... viii List of Figures .................................................................................................................... ix Acknowledgments............................................................................................................... x Dedication .......................................................................................................................... xi Chapter 1 – Introduction ................................................................................................ 1 Purpose ............................................................................................................................ 1 Rationale ......................................................................................................................... 1 A Closer Look at Canadian Violence Prevention Programs ........................................... 9 The Community Based Violence Prevention Project (CBVPP) ................................. 9 Roots of Empathy ..................................................................................................... 13 Lion’s Quest .............................................................................................................. 15 Other Programs ......................................................................................................... 16 Total Honesty/Total Heart as a Relevant Training ....................................................... 16 Choosing a Research Topic .......................................................................................... 17 Chapter Conclusion ....................................................................................................... 18 Chapter 2 – Literature Review ...................................................................................... 21 The Development of Nonviolent Communication as a Model ..................................... 21 Carl Rogers and Humanistic Psychology ................................................................. 21 Other Key Influences ................................................................................................ 22 Developing Community Based Practices .................................................................. 23 Foundational Concepts.............................................................................................. 24 Challenging Power Dynamics in Hierarchical Relationships ................................... 25 Gandhi as a Touchstone for Nonviolent Communication ......................................... 26 Evolution of the Nonviolent Communication Model ............................................... 27 Academic Analysis of the Nonviolent Communication Model ................................ 28 Nonviolent Communication and Other Early Conflict Resolution Models .................. 31 The Interest-Based Model ............................................................................................. 32 Nonviolent Communication in Relation to Interest-Based Negotiation ................... 34 The Gordon Model ........................................................................................................ 35 Summary of Gordon’s Pioneered Concepts .............................................................. 39 Nonviolent Communication in Relation to the Gordon Model ................................ 39 Nonviolent Communication and Restorative Justice .................................................... 42 Socio-Linguistic Transition from Retributive to Restorative Paradigm ................... 42 Retributive Language Patterns .................................................................................. 43 Personal Observations of Retributive Language in Casual Conflicts ....................... 45 Restorative Language Patterns .................................................................................. 46 Practical Impacts of Restorative Processes ............................................................... 49 Nonviolent Communication, Restorative Justice, and the Use of Force .................. 51 A Descriptive Overview of the Nonviolent Communication Model ............................ 52 (a) Honesty ................................................................................................................ 53 (b) Empathy .............................................................................................................. 54 iv (c) Self-Empathy ....................................................................................................... 55 Putting Honesty and Empathy Together ................................................................... 56 Summary of Nonviolent Communication as a Language of Restorative Justice...... 60 Gaps in the Literature.................................................................................................... 61 Chapter 3 – Descriptive Overview of Total Honesty/Total Heart .............................. 63 Learning the Components of Nonviolent Communication ........................................... 63 Activities to Support Learning .................................................................................. 64 Overview of the Training Structure .......................................................................... 65 Role-modelling as Part of the Training ..................................................................... 65 Overview of Individual Session Structure ................................................................ 66 Summary of the Training Program ........................................................................... 67 Chapter 4 – Methodology .............................................................................................. 68 Nonviolent Communication as a Central Touchstone .................................................. 68 Program Evaluation Methodology ................................................................................ 69 Phase One – Program Design 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