The Sacred Mirror Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd i 5/5/2003, 2:47:24 PM OMEGA BOOKS The OMEGA BOOKS series from Paragon House is dedicated to classic and contem po rary works about human development and the nature of ultimate real- ity, encompassing the fi elds of mysticism and spirituality, psychic research and para n or mal phenomena, the evolution of consciousness, and the human potential for self-directed growth in body, mind, and spirit. John White, M.A.T., Series Editor of OMEGA BOOKS, is an internationally known author, editor, and educator in the fi elds of consciousness research and higher human development. MORE TITLES IN OMEGA BOOKS BEYOND THE HUMAN SPECIES: The Life and Work of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, Georges van Vrekhem KUNDALINI: EMPOWERING HUMAN EVOLUTION Selected Writings of Gopi Krishna, edited by Gene Kieffer KUNDALINI EVOLUTION AND ENLIGHTENMENT Edited by John White LIFECYCLES: Reincarnation and the Web of Life Christopher M. Bache ONENESS PERCEIVED: A Window Into Enlightenment Jeffrey Eisen, Ph.D. THE MEETING OF SCIENCE AND SPIRIT Guidelines for a New Age, John White THE GHOSTS OF CONSCIOUSNESS Herbert Demin, Ph.D. THE RADIANCE OF BEING: Understanding the Grand Integral Vision; Living the Integral Life Allan Combs, Foreword by Ken Wilber Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd ii 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM The Sacred Mirror Nondual Wisdom & Psychotherapy Edited by John J. Prendergast Peter Fenner Sheila Krystal Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd iii 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM Published in the United States by Paragon House 2285 University Avenue West St. Paul, Minnesota 55114 Copyright © 2003 by Paragon House All rights reserved. No part of this book may be re pro duced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, elec tron ic, mechanical or oth er wise, without the prior written consent of the publishers, unless by a re- viewer who wishes to quote brief pas sag es. The Omega Books series from Paragon House is dedicated to classic and con tem - po rary works about human development and the nature of ultimate reality. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 For current information about all re leas es from Paragon House, visit the web site at www.paragonhouse.com Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd iv 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM for The one inner sage and its many outer forms Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd v 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd vi 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM Contents Acknowledgments ix 1. Introduction 1 John Prendergast 2. Nonduality and Therapy: Awakening the Unconditioned Mind 23 Peter Fenner 3. Love Returning for Itself 57 Adyashanti 4. Being Together 89 John Prendergast 5. A Nondual Approach To EMDR: Psychotherapy as Satsang 116 Sheila Krystal 6. Double Vision: Duality and Nonduality in Human Experience 138 John Welwood 7. Being Intimate with What Is: Healing the Pain of Separation 164 Dorothy Hunt 8. A Psychology of No-thingness: Seeing Through the Projected Self 185 Dan Berkow 9. Welcoming All That Is: Nonduality, Yoga Nidra, and the Play of Opposites in Psychotherapy 209 Richard Miller 10. Deconstructing the Self: The Uses of Inquiry in Psychotherapy and Spiritual Practice 229 Stephan Bodian 11. Healing Trauma in the Eternal Now 249 Lynn Marie Lumiere Galley Proofs Paragon House | vii Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd vii 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM viii | The Sacred Mirror 12. Jungian Analysis and Nondual Wisdom 268 Bryan Wittine 13. Dancing with Form and Emptiness in Intimate Relationship 290 Jennifer Welwood Selected Bibliography 303 About the Contributors 310 Index Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd viii 5/5/2003, 2:47:26 PM Acknowledgments Chapter 2, “Nonduality and Therapy: Awakening the Unconditioned Mind” by Peter Fenner. The T. S. Eliot poem is printed with permission from Faber and Faber. Chapter 7, “Being Intimate with What Is: Healing the Pain of Separa- tion” by Dorothy Hunt. The Rumi poem is printed with permission from HarperSanFrancisco. Galley Proofs Paragon House | ix Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd ix 5/5/2003, 2:47:27 PM sacredmirror.indd x 5/5/2003, 2:47:27 PM 1 Introduction John Prendergast Overview t the beginning of the twenty-fi rst Century we are witnessing Aan increasingly intimate conversation between Western psychotherapists and teachers from the Eastern wisdom traditions.1 This conversation has been happening simultaneously on a number of different levels. The most obvious and outward level is intellectual, evidenced by the growing stream of books and journal articles (mostly Buddhist), as well as by conferences and academic classes that include a Transpersonal or Integral orien- tation. However, a less obvious but more important part of this conversation is happening experientially and intuitively as psycho- therapists sit silently in meditation and dialogue with Indian and Southeast Asian sages, Japanese and Korean Zen masters, Middle Eastern Sufi s, Taoist masters, Tibetan lamas and rinpoches, and more recently with some of their long-term Western students who have become teachers in their own right. In fact, this conversation between Eastern-oriented dharma teachers and Western psycho- Galley Proofs Paragon House | 1 Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd 1 5/5/2003, 2:47:27 PM 2 | The Sacred Mirror therapists is a smaller part of a much larger dialogue that includes millions of nonpsychotherapists as well as teachers in the Chris- tian, Jewish, and native mystical traditions. In addition, increasing numbers of individuals in the West are reporting spontaneous and profound, life transforming awakenings without prior exposure to any spiritual teachers, teachings, or practices.2 Surveying these developments, we see the emergence of an essential dialogue, stripped of its cultural forms and roles, between the conditioned mind and that awareness which is unconditioned, open, and un- known. Reality seems to be enjoying this conversation with itself, since it is happening with increasing frequency and depth. The fruit of this dialogue has been an accelerated awakening of nondual wisdom. Nonduality is a rather curious and uncom- mon word that so far has been used by a relatively small number of scholars and teachers.3 It derives from the Sanskrit word advaita which means “not-two.” Nondual wisdom refers to the understand- ing and direct experience of a fundamental consciousness that un- derlies the apparent distinction between perceiver and perceived. From the nondual perspective, the split between self and other is a purely mental construct. This understanding, rooted in the direct experience of countless sages through millennia, is at the heart of Hindu Vedanta, most schools of Buddhism, and Taoism, and mys- tical Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. Nonduality is a particularly elegant and clear formulation, since it describes reality in terms of what it is not (unsplit, undivided) rather than what it is. It has the added advantage of being nonsectarian, unhinged to any particular religious or psychospiritual tradition, yet adaptable to many. It is a word that points to that which is before and beyond the projections of a separative, self-refl exive mind. What is pointed to can never be adequately conceptualized. It can only be lived in the timeless now. Nondual wisdom expresses itself as and through a radiant heart (love) and illumined mind (wisdom). While essentially without qualities, it is commonly experienced as being vast, free, spacious, heartfelt, and present-centered. Many people report feel- Galley Proofs Paragon House Copyrighted material sacredmirror.indd 2 5/5/2003, 2:47:27 PM Introduction | 3 ing a subtle joy, love, compassion, peace, gratitude, and sense of connectedness with all of life when they directly attune with it. There are many signs that this awareness is emerging in the West. Why now? Perhaps it is as the historian Charles Beard (Rogers, 1980; see bibliography) observed, “When the skies grow dark, the stars begin to shine.” This fl owering of nondual wisdom is presenting new challeng- es and opportunities for the fi eld of psychotherapy. While Wilber (2000, 1996) and other Integral/Transpersonal philosophers and psychologists have mapped out nondual awareness as the pinnacle of self-realization, it has been presented as a rarefi ed condition. Surprisingly, this no longer appears to be as true. As a result, a new generation of clinicians and teachers has begun to explore how this awareness directly impacts the way psychotherapists work. The title of this book, The Sacred Mirror, refers to the capac- ity of the therapist to refl ect back the essential nature of the cli- ent—that awareness that is prior to and inclusive of all thoughts, feelings, and sensations. Sacred mirroring is multidimensional, refl ecting both personal and impersonal dimensions of being. This capacity implies a high degree of maturity by therapists who are awakening to the realization that they are not only who they have taken themselves to be. They realize, at least to some degree, that they are not limited to being a “therapist” (although they may function in that role), or even a “person.” Their locus of identity is either resting in or moving toward unconditioned awareness, or Presence. The result is the emergence of a natural simplicity, trans- parency, clarity, and warm acceptance