CONGREGATION BETH SHOLOM B’nai Mitzvah Parent Handbook 2019-20 / 5780 Rabbi Dan Ain 415.221.8736 | [email protected] Rabbi Amanda Russell, Assistant Rabbi 415.940.7099 | [email protected] th 301 14 ​ Avenue, San Francisco, CA 94118 | 415.221.8736 | www.bethsholomsf.org ​ Dear Families, We are delighted to welcome you into preparations for marking this important milestone in the life of your family. Our staff and clergy are honored to be here to assist you through every step of the process. On the day of your simcha (joyous event), the entire ​ ​ congregation will celebrate with you! For the B’nai Mitzvah student, this event marks a transition to a new role and ​ ​ relationship with the Jewish community. Becoming a Jewish adult brings new opportunities to participate in Jewish life. After becoming a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, a ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ person counts in a minyan (quorum of 10 Jewish adults), can go up to the Torah for an ​ ​ aliyah (chant blessings), and can serve as a Shaliach Tzibbur, the leader of prayer ​ ​ ​ services. For parents, this is a time for the family to engage more fully in Jewish life and learning. To help you along this process, we have added family education opportunities as an integral part of the B’nai Mitzvah program. There is something wonderful in seeing ​ ​ parents study Torah with their child, and we know this is a special part of the preparation time valued by both students and their parents. While both Rabbis will be by your side for the duration of this process, Rabbi Russell is specifically dedicated to all things “B’nai Mitzvah.” If you have any questions or ​ ​ concerns along the way, please do not hesitate to reach out directly. We want this process to be as smooth and meaningful as possible! To that end, this handbook should answer many logistical questions that you may have. Please take the time to read ​ through it. There is even a very helpful hebrew glossary in the back should you need ​ any clarification on hebrew words. We look forward to accompanying you along this extraordinary journey. Mazel tov! ​ ​ Rabbi Dan Ain Rabbi Amanda Russell 1 Table of Contents The Process…………………………………………………………………….………………………...5 B’nai Mitzvah Education Program………………………………..…………………………………..5-7 Additional Studies…………………………………………………………………………………….…..7 - With your tutor - With the Rabbi Costs…………………………....……………………………………………………………...………….7 The Week Of……………………………………………………………………………...……...……….8 Timeline and Checklist……….…………………………………………………………………..………9 Honors……………………………….………………………………………………...…...………...10-11 - Aliyot - Torah Readers - Additional Honors Shabbat Decorum……………………....……………………………………………...……………….12 Special Additions……………………....………………………………………………..………………12 - The Program - Kippot Shabbat Morning Childcare……………………....……………………………………...…..………..12 HaLuach Announcement……………………....………………………………………………..……..12 J-Weekly Announcement……………………....……………………………………....……...………12 Logistics…………………...............................…………………………………………………….13-14 - Financial Obligations - Kiddush - Reception - Flowers Addendum - Certificate Information……………………....…..…………………………………………..…16 - Aliyot/Torah Reader Information……....…….....……………………...……………….…….17 - Honors Information……………………....…….....…………………………………..………..18 - Aliyah Honors for Guests……………………....…….…………………………..……………19 2 - Prayer for Our Country……………………....…….....……………..………………………...20 - Prayer for the State of Israel……………………....…….....………..………………………..21 - Prayer for Peace……………………....…….....…………………...………………………….22 - Parent Blessing……………………....…….....……………………..……………………..23-24 - Biography for HaLuach……………………....…….....………….………………………..25-26 - Approved Caterers……………………....…….....………………..…………………………..27 - Glossary of Important Words……………………....…….......…………………………...28-29 3 IMPORTANT CONTACTS Rabbi Amanda Russell Assistant Rabbi; B’nai Mitzvah Coordinator [email protected] For all ritual and educational questions surrounding b’nai mitzvah ​ Beth Jones Acting Executive Director [email protected] For membership and payment information Bill Crotty Executive Assistant to Rabbi Ain [email protected] For scheduling appointments with Rabbi Ain 4 THE PROCESS Prerequisites: ● CBS membership when the student enters his/her B’nai Mitzvah cohort. ​ ​ o Two years of participation in the B’nai Mitzvah program and demonstration of ​ ​ Hebrew and Judaic skills prior to the B’nai Mitzvah class. Hebrew proficiency will be ​ ​ assessed at the beginning of the process and additional tutoring may be required. ● Jewish day school students are required to enroll and participate in the B’nai Mitzvah ​ program for two years prior to becoming B’nai Mitzvah. ​ The bar or bat mitzvah aspires to master the following at a minimum: ​ ​ ​ ​ ● Chant the brachot (blessings) for an Aliyah to the Torah ​ ​ ​ ​ ● Chant the Maftir section of the weekly Torah reading ​ ​ ​ ​ ● Present a d’var Torah, an interpretation and teaching from the Torah portion ​ ​ ● Chant the blessings for the haftarah as well as their assigned haftarah portion ​ ​ ​ ​ ● Lead the Torah service ● Learn how to lay tefillin with the appropriate blessings ​ ​ Upon successfully mastering the above, the bar or bat mitzvah is encouraged to continue ​ ​ ​ ​ learning the following: ● Chant the seventh aliyah section of the weekly Torah reading or any number of additional ​ ​ aliyot in the weekly Torah portion ​ ● Lead Shabbat shacharit and/or musaf in the morning service ​ ​ ​ ​ ● Lead Friday night kiddush ​ THE B’NAI MITZVAH EDUCATION PROGRAM As you embark upon this b’nai mitzvah process, each student will receive a B’nai Mitzvah binder ​ ​ that includes all of the materials that he/she will need throughout this process. To ensure that every student has an opportunity to complete the education requirements before celebrating his/her Bar/Bat Mitzvah, we have created cohorts to fit your needs! Rather than ​ ​ grades as correlating to secular school, students will be grouped into cohorts depending on the Bar/Bat Mitzvah date. Each cohort meets for 2-years and are as follows: ​ ​ ​ Cohort 0 - “Reuven” - 09/2019-12/2020 Cohort 1 - “Simeon” - 1/2021-12/2021 Cohort 2 - “Levi” - 1/2022-12/2022 Cohort 3 - “Judah” - 1/2023-12/2023 Cohort 4 - “Dan” - 1/2024-12/2024 Our two-year B’nai Mitzvah program strives not only to prepare your student for the day itself, ​ ​ but to teach your child what it means to be Jewish today at CBS, in San Francisco and in our modern world. That being said, we realize that there are real skills that each student needs to master before they stand before our community on their Bar/Bat Mitzvah day. Over the course ​ ​ of two years, students will master skills in each of the following three topics: 5 Prayer - Students will be provided with the skills necessary to be able to walk into any synagogue service and be able to “hold their own.” They will learn the ins and outs of a typical service, including but not limited to Shabbat morning davenning, Torah blessings and an ​ ​ introduction to Torah trope (how to chant the Torah). Year 1 Year 2 Torah Service Blessings for Haftarah (after) - Ein Kamokha Chatzi Kaddish - Bei Ana Rakhetz Mourner’s Kaddish - Shema Ahavah Rabah - Returning Torah to the Ark 3rd paragraph of Shema (tzit-tzit) Blessings for an aliyah Musaf (Kedushah, concluding prayers) Kaddish Shalem Blessings for Tefillin Intro to Torah trope Blessings for Haftarah (before) Parashah - Students will be provided with the skills necessary to communicate with our tradition, to ask big questions of our texts and to relate these texts to their own lives and the lives of others. They will learn the distinction between p’shat (exact reading) and d’rash (interpretive ​ ​ ​ ​ reading), become familiar with distinguishing characteristics of torah commentators and begin to think about what it means to have their own voice regarding our Torah. Participation - Students will be provided with the skills necessary to be an active participant in our Jewish community. This includes being given the skills to participate fully in our services, holiday and community events and social action. Year 1 Year 2 Day(s) Thurs, 4-6pm Thurs, 6-8pm What? 2/month - Prayer/Parashah/Participation 2/month - Learn w the Rabbis! 2/month - Hebrew** 2/month - Hebrew** ** Opportunity for students to place out ** Opportunity for students to place out Day(s) Shabbat morning Shabbat morning Learner's Minyan (1/month) Learner's Minyan (1/month) B'nai Mitzvah Education** Participate in Main Sanctuary (1/month) ** Opportunity for students to place out; - Open ark/other honors students who place out of the B’nai Mitzvah - Hand out siddurim ​ Ed. program will mirror "year 2" requirements - Lead prayers as practice 6 Shabbat Learners Service with Rabbi Russell There is no better way to know Shabbat services than by attending them. We recommend regular attendance at Shabbat morning services and expect attendance at the monthly Shabbat ​ ​ Learners Service led by Rabbi Russell. The Learners Service will guide you through a traditional service and provide insight and explanation toward the prayers we recite on Shabbat Morning. As prayer becomes more comfortable and familiar, individuals will have the opportunity to help lead prayers, portions of the service, and bless or read from the Torah. Family Education Sessions with the Rabbis All students in the B’nai Mitzvah program will participate in four Family Education sessions on ​ ​ Thursday evenings. We begin with minyan, followed by dinner and learning together. Students are required to attend these