City University of New York (CUNY) CUNY Academic Works All Dissertations, Theses, and Capstone Projects Dissertations, Theses, and Capstone Projects 6-2017 Narrating School, Narrative Self: Identity, Agency and the Hidden Curriculum of (Hetero)Normativity Mikela Bjork The Graduate Center, City University of New York How does access to this work benefit ou?y Let us know! More information about this work at: https://academicworks.cuny.edu/gc_etds/2130 Discover additional works at: https://academicworks.cuny.edu This work is made publicly available by the City University of New York (CUNY). Contact: [email protected] NARRATING SCHOOL, NARRATING SELF: IDENTITY, AGENCY, AND THE HIDDEN CURRICULUM OF (HETERO)NORMATIVITY by MIKELA BJORK A dissertation submitted to the Graduate Faculty in Urban Education in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy, The City University of New York 2017 © 2017 MIKELA BJORK All Rights Reserved ii Narrating School, Narrating Self: Identity, Agency, and the Hidden Curriculum of (Hetero)normativity by Mikela Bjork The manuscript has been read and accepted for the Graduate Faculty in Urban Education in satisfaction of the dissertation requirement for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy. 28 April 2017 Terrie Epstein Date Advisor Name Chair of Examining Committee 28 April 2017 Anthony Picciano Date EO Name Executive Officer Supervisory Committee: Dr. Terrie Epstein Dr. Michelle Fine Dr. David Connor THE CITY UNIVERSITY OF NEW YORK iii ABSTRACT Narrating School, Narrating Self: Identity, Agency, and the Hidden Curriculum of (Hetero)normativity by Mikela Bjork Advisor: Terrie Epstein This dissertation analyzes sober women’s narratives of their schooling experiences to reflect on how educators and policy makers can improve the schooling experiences for othered students.. Inspired by the self-reflective and agentic pedagogy found within the figured world of Alcoholics Anonymous, I focused on the narratives of women in Alcoholics Anonymous, ages 18-85, as they narrated their schooling stories from pre-Kindergarten up to the last grade they completed. What the data of this qualitative research project reveals is that, despite the detrimental culture of denial at home and school, the participants, through the radical act of self- reflexivity and personal narrative, authored their experiences of resiliency, which are invaluable messages for our students both in and outside of the physical boundaries of school. The implications of this research include the importance of teaching self-reflexivity in teacher- training, questioning our social location and our personal definitions of “normalcy,” when considering what is “wrong” with our students who learn differently, and how the institution of public health and education can be in better conversation with each other in order to best support the complex needs of our students. iv ACKNOWLEDGMENTS Thank you to my family—blood related and chosen--for your words of encouragement as I embarked upon this journey. Thank you to my Graduate Center friends and colleagues, for challenging me to constantly push my thinking, reasoning and analysis. Thank you to my loving wife, who has supported me and our family as I follow this dream of becoming a doctor. Thank you to all of the participants of this project, for your bravery, vulnerability and willingness to share your narratives. Thank you to my mother and father for inspiring me in very different ways and loving me unconditionally through my many journeys. Thank you to the poets, artists and creatives, who have taken risks and modeled to me what it means to be an educator who thinks and lives against the grain. Thank you to Feminism, for providing a persistent counter discourse to the hetero-patriarchal, misogynist discourse that I believe will one day no longer be the norm. Thank you to my unborn son, August Rodham Hornbjork, who is due any day now, for motivating and inspiring me to birth this dissertation. Thank you, Jean Anyon, for your intellect and unwavering love and support as my advisor; you are with me, always. v TABLE OF CONTENTS Chapter 1 ......................................................................................................................................... 1 Statement of the Problem ............................................................................................................ 3 The Hidden Curriculum of Heteronormativity ............................................................................ 4 Why Is This Important? ............................................................................................................... 7 Why Women in AA? ................................................................................................................. 10 Identity and Agency .................................................................................................................. 13 Research Questions ................................................................................................................... 14 Methodology .............................................................................................................................. 14 Data Analysis ............................................................................................................................. 16 Chapter 2: Conceptual Framework and Literature Review ........................................................... 18 Constructions of Gender in Schools .......................................................................................... 18 The Hidden Curriculum ............................................................................................................. 28 Figured Worlds .......................................................................................................................... 33 Rationale .................................................................................................................................... 44 Chapter 3: Methods ....................................................................................................................... 46 Data Collection .......................................................................................................................... 46 Data Analysis ............................................................................................................................. 48 Validity and Reliability ............................................................................................................. 51 Positionality ............................................................................................................................... 52 Limitations ................................................................................................................................. 53 Chapter 4: Gender Performance, Sexuality, and the Hidden Curriculum of Heteronormativity .. 54 Gender Performance .................................................................................................................. 54 The Hidden Curriculum of Heteronormativity .......................................................................... 60 Rape ........................................................................................................................................... 66 vi Sexuality .................................................................................................................................... 71 Chapter 5: Invisibility/Hypervisibility .......................................................................................... 77 Anna .......................................................................................................................................... 77 Sara ............................................................................................................................................ 87 Beth .......................................................................................................................................... 102 Chapter 6: Survival, Resiliency, Hope ........................................................................................ 115 Survival .................................................................................................................................... 115 Resiliency ................................................................................................................................ 123 Hope ........................................................................................................................................ 129 Chapter 7: Implications ............................................................................................................... 135 How Do Women in AA Narrate Their Schooling Experiences? ............................................. 135 What Discourses Do Women in AA Draw on to Author Their Identities? ............................. 138 What Educational Policy Implications Can Be Drawn From These Narratives? .................... 139 Future Research ....................................................................................................................... 143 Appendix ..................................................................................................................................... 145 References ................................................................................................................................... 146 vii Chapter 1