DISSERTATION FATHERS NURTURING THEIR CHILDREN POST-DIVORCE: THE FATHERS‘ PERSPECTIVE Submitted by Lynda A. Kemp School of Education In partial fulfillment of requirements For the Degree of Doctor of Philosophy Colorado State University Fort Collins, Colorado Summer 2011 Doctoral Committee: Advisor: Sharon Anderson John Littrell Kimberly Bundy-Fazioli Louise Jennings Copyright by Lynda A. Kemp 2011 All Rights Reserved ABSTRACT FATHERS NURTURING THEIR CHILDREN POST-DIVORCE: THE FATHERS‘ PERSPECTIVE Nurturing requires engagement and engagement can be difficult to achieve if a father does not, due to divorce, share as much time with his children as he did previously. Using an Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis approach, this study solicited from divorced fathers a description of their experience nurturing their children post-divorce. While much research focuses on the need of children for their father to be there; this study focused on the fathers‘ need to be there. The data in this study—the divorced fathers‘ voices—described nurturing post- divorce as a composite of both external actions and situations, and internal feelings. Overall, the data reflected the desire and commitment of these fathers to maintain, or rebuild, a nurturing relationship with their children. Two general observations emerged from these fathers‘ stories: that the ―loss‖ of their children through divorce brought to light just how precious their fathering role was, and that often times fathers‘ relationships with their children were enhanced post-divorce. However, while being there was the common ―thread‖ that ran through the post- divorce nurturing experience, the meaning of being there varied from father to father. Therefore, even if the ―essence‖ of nurturing post-divorce is being there, being there is changeable, and experienced differently, by every divorced father. ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Thank you to the fathers who generously agreed to share their stories. To my advisor, Sharon Anderson: Sharon, it‘s been six years, master‘s to Ph.D., who will I be if I‘m not a graduate student? I guess the real therapy begins now! I hope we can collaborate in the future. To John Littrell: technically my methodologist, but more a friend than anything else. I‘ll stop by if I‘m ever in Santa Fe. Perhaps now I‘ll finally have time to read your books. To my mom, who still doesn‘t really understand what it is I do, or am doing, but supports me unconditionally anyway. Thanks, Jackie. To too many friends to count, both old and new, who thought it made perfect sense that I was doing this, but particularly to Liz and Larr. And to Jeff, who inadvertently dropped this topic in my lap, and I‘m sure got much more than he bargained for. You were always willing to walk the ―pack‖ when I was too busy studying/working/ writing/sleeping, and to challenge my choice of methodology. Thanks, sweetie. And to my dear friend Heidi, who once said after I started this journey, ―you always were an advocate, you just needed something to advocate for.‖ And finally, to my great grandfather Gustav Berg. Who, 100 years ago as an ambitious immigrant from Sweden in search of the ―American Dream,‖ had the foresight to buy stock in a little German brewery in St. Louis…as a gift for his daughter Mabel. I wonder if he knew how far that gift would go? iii DEDICATION To Alexandra Nicole Kosan Because you deserve the best dad in the whole world (and you got him!). iv TABLE OF CONTENTS ABSTRACT ........................................................................................................................ ii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ............................................................................................... iii DEDICATION ................................................................................................................... iv I – INTRODUCTION AND BACKGROUND .................................................................. 1 Background ..................................................................................................................... 1 Purpose of the Study ....................................................................................................... 2 Research Question .......................................................................................................... 3 Potential Significance ..................................................................................................... 3 Researcher‘s Perspective ................................................................................................ 5 Delimitations and Limitations ......................................................................................... 6 Delimitations ............................................................................................................... 7 Limitations .................................................................................................................. 8 Definitions of Terms ..................................................................................................... 10 II – LITERATURE REVIEW ........................................................................................... 12 Introduction ................................................................................................................... 12 Defining Fathering ........................................................................................................ 12 Evolution of Research on Fathers ................................................................................. 13 Methodological Approaches in Fathering Research ..................................................... 14 Theoretical Framework: Role and Identity Theory ...................................................... 16 v Nurturing Fathers .......................................................................................................... 18 Defining Nurturance ................................................................................................. 18 Obstacles to Nurturing for Fathers ............................................................................ 20 Fathering Post-Divorce and Emotional Well-Being ..................................................... 21 Problems or Tensions in the Field ................................................................................ 24 Conclusion .................................................................................................................... 26 III – METHODOLOGY ................................................................................................... 28 Introduction ................................................................................................................... 28 Methodological Approach ............................................................................................ 28 Rational and Evidence for the Selected Methodology .................................................. 29 Research Design and ―Propositions‖ ............................................................................ 30 Evaluation of the Quality/Validity of the Approach ..................................................... 31 Background on Phenomenology ............................................................................... 31 Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis ............................................................... 33 Validity of the Approach .......................................................................................... 34 Data Collection, Analysis, and Form of Results ........................................................... 35 Study Population ....................................................................................................... 35 Sample....................................................................................................................... 36 Data Collection ......................................................................................................... 37 Data Analysis ............................................................................................................ 39 Reliability and Validity ................................................................................................. 40 IV – FINDINGS ................................................................................................................ 44 Introduction ................................................................................................................... 44 vi The Participants ............................................................................................................ 45 Transcription Process and Conventions ........................................................................ 49 Overview of Themes ..................................................................................................... 51 External Themes ....................................................................................................... 53 Summary of External Themes .................................................................................. 76 Internal Themes ........................................................................................................ 76 Summary of Internal Themes.................................................................................... 85 Combined Themes .................................................................................................... 85 Summary of Combined Themes ..............................................................................