On September 17, 2004, Lynn Gordon “Gordie” Bailey, Jr. was found dead at the Chi Psi fraternity house at the University of Colorado in Boulder. He was 18 years old. On the evening prior to his death, Gordie and twenty-six other pledges dressed in coats and ties for the fraternity “bid night” event. They were blindfolded and taken to the fraternity’s lodge in the mountains of Arapaho Roosevelt National Forest. Once at the lodge, Gordie and the other pledges were instructed to drink all of the alcohol provided by the fraternity members in 30 minutes, in order to be able to return to the fraternity house. The pledges quickly consumed four handles of whiskey and six bottles of wine around a bonfire and were transported back to the Chi Psi house. When the group returned to the fraternity house, Gordie was visibly intoxicated and was placed on a couch to “sleep it off” at approximately 11pm. When Gordie passed out on that couch, the fraternity brothers wrote all over his body with permanent markers—a fraternity ritual meant to embarrass brothers who pass out. Gordie was left on the couch in the Chi Psi house for 10 hours before he was found dead at 9am the next morning, face down on the floor. No one had called for help. Lynn Gordon “Gordie” Bailey, Jr. This is probably the first word I ever said to Gordie because I “Dough.” couldn’t pronounce the full “Gordo.” He was the most amazing person I have ever met. And I truly mean that. I am so glad I got to know him, and more importantly, have him as a brother. He was always so protective, never letting me watch certain TV shows and never willing to swear in front of me. And I can tell that he acted as a big brother to many of you, too. He was always looking out for the people he cared about, and had such a great trust and faith in people. He had that amazing bear hug that I’m sure most of you would remember. And that duck walk … which definitely runs in the Herrlinger side of the “fam” as Gord would say. He had such high self-confidence, more than anyone I know. He never cared about what people had to say about him, as long as he could put a smile on their face. And I think that is truly what he lived for—to make other people happy. Gord had such an incredible range of talents, pursuing almost everything he was interested in, in only 18 years. He was one of those rare people that when you saw him, you just had to smile. It was so contagious. And I even saw that when he would meet people for the first time. I think everyone looked up to him for his amazing ability to light up a room instantly. He was one of those people that would never talk about himself. And I know this because many of the people in Dallas never knew his love for acting, which he started at Deerfield. 1 I think anyone who had the privilege of knowing him would agree that we all learned something from him. He taught us to always stay optimistic and always look at the good side of everything. He never complained. And he was never mad. He would always cheer up my day with his ridiculous faces and movie quotes. Most importantly, he made me feel like the most important person in the world because he was always eager to be with me. I never understood how he could be so good at so many things at such a young age, but now I think I understand. He was only given 18 years to live and he made the absolute best of it. I believe he did more in his few years than many people have done in 50. “I never understood how he could be so good at so many things at such a young age, but now I think I understand. He was only given 18 years to live and he made the absolute best of it.” —Lily Lanahan When I was little, he would always make fun of how I ordered food in a quiet voice that made me seem so unsure of myself, since he would order so that basically the entire restaurant could hear. He taught me to be sure of myself and proud of whatever I do. He was proud to be a Texan when he went to Deerfield and then so proud to have come from Deerfield when he went to Boulder. And something that I just realized recently is that what I am most proud of, is to have been his sister. I know this is a hard day for everyone and I don’t know if this helps, but I definitely know it comforts me. The day I found out about this tragic event, I was waiting in the airport and all of the sudden, I heard from a TV next to me, “Hey Blue, there’s no ice in my lemonade. Drop and give me 10, NOW!” said by actor Will Farrell in Old School. This was probably Gord’s favorite line from one of his favorite movies. I truly think this is Gord’s way of telling me he is all right. We are all so lucky to have known him and I truly feel worse for the people who never got to meet him. He was definitely one of a kind and I think everyone will remember his happy way of life forever. I will always love you, Gordie. As my big brother, my greatest role model, and my best friend in the whole world. —Adapted from the tribute Lily gave at age 14 during Gordie’s memorial. September, 2004 2 Gordie and Lily 3 Leslie, Gordie, Michael, and Lily 4 Called to Act Losing a Son, Continuing his Story eptember 17, 2019, marks the passing of 15 years since Lynn Gordon “Gordie” Bailey, Jr. Sdied a preventable, senseless hazing death at the University of Colorado in Boulder. Fifteen years feels like a long time ago, and somehow still like yesterday for his mother and stepfather, Leslie and Michael Lanahan. They can recall in painstaking detail where they were when they learned of Gordie’s death, and it’s incredibly difficult to think about that time. Leslie had talked to Gordie on the phone shortly before he left for the fraternity pledging ceremony that killed him. “Gordie called Leslie as she and I were driving down to Austin for a meeting. Gordie was really happy to tell us that he had made the lacrosse club as a freshman. It was a 2-minute phone call because he had to rush off—he told us that he was accepted to pledge at Chi Psi, and had to go get dressed up for the pledging ceremony,” Michael remembers. “I think about that phone call a lot. If Leslie had handed me the phone, would I have said, ‘Be careful?’ Having been in a fraternity, I’m not sure I could have given him the warnings—in my experience, we didn’t have a ceremony that would have people drink to excess and put their lives in danger. It wasn’t something I was thinking about at the time, so would I have even said that to him?” The fact that they didn’t know what their son was about to face, or that alcohol overdose was possible and deadly, is why Leslie and Michael didn’t retreat after Gordie’s death—instead, they felt compelled to take action to prevent other families from feeling their same pain and loss. As hard as it was to share Gordie’s story through their grief, they wanted Gordie to not be forgotten. Their boy had lived 18 years, and hazing couldn’t steal that time from them like it stole his future. 5 Gordie Bailey, 1986–2004 Gordie was born in Connecticut on February 22, 1986, and was the first child for Leslie and her then-husband, Lynn Gordon Bailey, Sr. When Gordie was a baby, Leslie was working toward a degree in interior design at the New York School of Interior Design, after having been an advertising executive in New York and San Francisco. She felt design school was a great way to build the foundation for a career that would allow her flexibility, and to be home with her kids as they grew up. “I didn’t want to be on a train commuting from Connecticut and be gone all day—I wanted something more creative and something I could do from home.” After Leslie and Lynn divorced, Leslie and Michael were married and she moved to Dallas, TX, with 3-year-old Gordie. Michael was in Dallas pouring his time and energy into Greystone Communities, the company he founded in New York City in 1982. A daughter for Leslie and Michael followed a year later—Lily was born shortly after Gordie’s 4th birthday. “As a child, Gordie was so busy,” Leslie says with a laugh. “He was like a giant golden retriever. He was so loving and eager to please. Thankfully, we found the perfect school for him in Dallas—Lamplighter School, whose campus is like a farm with animals. He attended Lamplighter until 4th grade, and it was perfect for him—he was sword fighting, jumping all over, just busy. It was very hands-on, and Gordie thrived in a creative environment.