B NDINGS Vol. 34, No. 3 A Publication of New Ways Ministry Fall 2014–Winter 2015 Belgian bishop advocates church recognition of gay relationships By John A. Dick its blessing for gay and lesbian couples? es) exists for man-woman relations as well National Catholic Reporter as for same-sex relations.” December 30, 2014 “Personally, I find that in the church more space must be given to Later in his interview, Bonny stressed Bishop Johan Bonny of Antwerp, Bel- acknowledge the actual quality of gay openness, the need for further reflection gium, has called for ecclesiastical recogni- and lesbian couples; and such a form of and the danger of getting wrapped up in a tion of gay relationships, according to an shared-life should meet the same criteria complex ideological discussion. He interview published in De Morgen, a Bel- as found in an ecclesiastical marriage,” stressed as well that he is a strong advo- gian newspaper, on Dec. 27. Bonny said. “… And we have to cate for recognizing a diversity of rela- The official teaching that the Catholic acknowledge that such criteria can be tionships that arise from serious reflection church can recognize only male-female found in a diversity of relationships and on practical pastoral realities. committed relationships has to change, one needs to search for various models Professor Rik Torfs, canon law expert Bonny said. to give form to those relationships.” and rector of the Catholic University of "There should be recognition of a di- Bonny stressed that the man-woman Leuven, warned that one should not mini- versity of forms," he said. "We have to relationship has a special place in the mize Bonny’s approach. look inside the church for a formal recog- Christian tradition. "Do not underestimate the significance nition of the kind of interpersonal rela- “This relationship will continue to of this,” he said. “Bonny advocates a tionship that is also present in many gay Bishop Johan Bonny retain its own particular sacramental change from principles long held as un- couples. Just as there are a variety of legal character and liturgical form,” Bonny shakable, something no bishop could have frameworks for partners in civil society, ple and modern kinds of relationships. said. “But this particularity does not done under the dogmatic pontificates of one must arrive at a diversity of forms in “In his or her life,” he said, have to be exclusive nor does it have to Pope John Paul II and Pope Benedict the church… The intrinsic values are “everyone has to deal with relation- close the door on a diversity of relation- XVI." more important to me than the institution- ships, friendship, family, and children's ships whose inner qualities the church Bonny has a doctorate in theology al question. The Christian ethic is based education. We should not deny that can acknowledge.” from the Pontifical Gregorian University on lasting relationships where exclusivity, dealing with these issues within the “Indeed, we need to seek a formal in Rome. In 1997, Cardinal Godfried Dan- loyalty, and care are central to each oth- church has brought injuries and trau- recognition of the kind of relationship neels and the Belgian bishops appointed er." mas. Too many people were excluded that exists between many gay and lesbi- him rector of the Belgian College in Bonny made headlines in Septem- for a long time." an couples,” he said. “Does that recog- Rome; and in 2008 he was appointed the ber when he issued a letter to the Vatican Bonny said the open-minded spirit nition have to be a sacramental mar- Bishop of Antwerp. Most observers see in preparation for the Synod on the family and pastoral focus of Pope Francis have riage? Perhaps the church could much him becoming the next archbishop (and in October. At that time, Bonny stressed given him the courage to speak out better reflect on a diversity of forms of cardinal) of the Malines-Brussels archdio- that the church urgently needs to connect about issues that are important and relationships. One has the same kind of cese, when the incumbent, Archbishop with contemporary society, showing more pressing for today’s believers. discussion about civil marriages. In Bel- André-Joseph Léonard, offers the pope his respect for homosexuality, divorced peo- Will the church at some point give gium the same model (for civil marriag- letter of retirement, at age 75, in May. New Ways Ministry’s response to Belgian bishop’s statement principles are the same ones which the tired auxiliary bishop of Sydney, Aus- it. It comes at a time when the entire December 30, 2014 majority of Catholic theologians today tralia, has called for the Church to re- Church is focused on the idea of marriage Mount Rainier, Maryland say should be the basis of the Church’s vamp its sexual ethics in a more pro- and family as we discuss these issues in New Ways Ministry strongly applauds sexual ethics, instead of basing these gressive way, and in a way which would this year between the synods on marriage Bishop Johan Bonny’s call for ecclesiasti- ethics on a procreative standard and an open the possibility of recognizing and and family. Bishop Bonny’s statements cal recognition of lesbian and gay cou- outdated concept of male-female com- blessing same-gender relationships. will have a profound effect on this discus- ples. This is the first time in known histo- plementarity. Many bishops and other church leaders sion because he is raising an idea which ry that a Catholic bishop has made such Bishop Bonny’s statements are the have recently been calling for legal has too long been suppressed, but which an explicit call for same-gender couples first time a Catholic bishop has explicit- recognition of same-gender couples, many in the Church have desired. He to receive recognition and affirmation that ly called for ecclesiastical recognition of though none has gone so far as to ask gives voice to a major segment of Catholi- is equal to that of heterosexual couples. same-gender couples, but it is not the for recognition from the Church for cism which has previously been voiceless. His request is based on the fact that the first time that a bishop has shown sup- these couples. Courage breeds courage. Let’s pray that moral qualities of faithfulness, loyalty, port for such ideas. In the 1990s, Bishop Gay and lesbian Catholics and their other bishops will follow Bishop Bonny’s and care which characterize lesbian and Jacques Gaillot of Evreux, France, was supporters will surely welcome Bishop example and speak out for recognizing the gay couples are the very same principles removed from his diocese, in part be- Bonny’s call, as they have made this holiness in the committed relationships of which characterize the unique form of cause he blessed a gay couple’s relation- same call for many decades now, though lesbian and gay couples. heterosexually married couples. These ship. Bishop Geoffrey Robinson, a re- previous papacies have tried to silence By Deacon Ray Dever as transgender. In doing so, she became comes up, many Catholics are taken mately connected with her mental health Bondings 2.0 one of only three openly trans* students aback when they’re told that the Church struggles. NewWaysMinistryBlog.wordpress.com at Georgetown at the time. This hap- already has married clergy, mostly in When our daughter came out, my wife December 28, 2014 pened just a few weeks after the now the person of the approximately 18,000 and I experienced the full range of On this first Sunday after Christmas, famous Pope Francis interview that permanent deacons in the US. I can’t thoughts and emotions that any parents do the Church observes the feast of the Holy made “Who am I to judge?” part of our imagine what they would think if they in that situation – shock at the news, a Family. And with that observance inevi- vernacular. And with those events, my realized there are Catholic clergy whose lack of understanding of gender issues, tably comes reflection on the nature and family found ourselves plunged into all families include LGBTQ children! conflict with what the Church teaches meaning of the Catholic family to- the questions and issues that Catholic Our journey has probably not been about human sexuality, confusion and day. Many within the Church still seem families with LGBTQ children face. very different than the journey of any guilt about what we should do as parents, to hold an idealized and increasingly inac- [Editor’s note: The term “trans*” is family with an LGBTQ child. It really profound sadness at what felt like the loss curate vision of what a Catholic family used as a “catch-all” word for the di- began with our daughter descending into of our son, fear and worry for what the looks like, in spite of the growing diversi- verse forms of gender identities (other a deep depression during high future would hold for her. There were ty of the families that comprise the people than the traditional male/female bina- school. We would learn more about arguments, sleepless nights, and prayers – of God. As one who would count my own ry) that exist in humanity.] depression and mental illness, about lots of prayers. family among that diversity, the topic of In our case, there was at least one suicidal ideations and self-injurious be- We slowly came to the realization that Catholic family holds considerable per- notable difference. Besides being a hus- havior, about therapists and anti- we hadn’t lost the person who had been sonal interest for me.