Northern Michigan University NMU Commons All NMU Master's Theses Student Works 7-2018 I Was Thinking Something In The aC r, But Now I Forgot OllieMae Bartlett [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: https://commons.nmu.edu/theses Part of the Poetry Commons Recommended Citation Bartlett, OllieMae, "I Was Thinking Something In The aC r, But Now I Forgot" (2018). All NMU Master's Theses. 545. https://commons.nmu.edu/theses/545 This Open Access is brought to you for free and open access by the Student Works at NMU Commons. It has been accepted for inclusion in All NMU Master's Theses by an authorized administrator of NMU Commons. For more information, please contact [email protected],[email protected]. I Was Thinking Something In The Car, But Now I Forgot By Ollie Mae Abstract This collection consists of modern free verse poetry, left around town, captured with an instant camera using a capitalist lens and developed in the bottom of a purse. Sometimes found, sometimes torn down, sometimes scribbled, riddled, pickled, stickled, belittled, embrittled and initialed, sometimes made by mistake but always left hungry and up for debate. IN I WAS THINKING SOMETHING IN THE CAR, BUT NOW I FORGOT, THE VOICE IS YOUR VOICE, ONLY FROM OVER HERE, SOMEWHERE YOU’VE NEVER BEEN BUT COULD IMAGINE IF YOU TRIED. THE VOICE SPEAKS TO THE MACHINE WE’VE MADE TOGETHER: THE FLORESCENT, 24HR SIGNS, PRESS 3 FOR PHARMACY HOURS, INSERT CHIP, MENSTRUAL OBSCENITY, 2 DAY SHIPPING, AIRBRUSHED, DISPLAY PRODUCTS, INTERACTIVE ADVERTISEMENT, LIABILITY CLAUSE, PERSONAL BRANDING, DISPOSABLE FASHION, INSTANT GRATIFICATION. 1 Dedication To Kopi, Because you’re a cat, you’ll never know or care about the poems you’ve inspired. Copyright by Alesha Bartlett 2018 2 Acknowledgments Thank you Karl Schroeder for inspiring me with your unquenchable curiosity, your good taste in YouTube videos, and your own creative work with music and writing. You’ve changed the way I look at the world around me, and changed the way I look at myself. thank you for loving me and for teaching me how pretty the winter can be. We’re going to be OK farmers. Thank you Patricia Killelea for your wisdom, keen suggestions, and inspiring classes. A warm thank you to Patricia’s cats Mama and Biscuit. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for NMU giving me the opportunity to work and learn by the beautiful Lake Superior, thank you. Finally, thank you to the Graduate and Research Office for granting me the Excellence in Education Award to support my writing project in the summer of 2018. 3 CONTENTS INTRODUCTION...............................................................................................................................................1 I WISH IT WERE HIDDEN IN THE STAINED-GLASS WINDOW OF MURDER ACROSS TOWN.........................11 YOU CAN TRUST EVERYDAY........................................................................................................................12 TROUBLE SHOOTING..................................................................................................................................14 I WISH GOOGLE WAS A CERTIFIED THERAPIST...........................................................................................16 WHAT IS THE OPPOSITE OF AM?....................................................................................................................18 HAIKU 1........................................................................................................................................................19 RATHER THAN AIR OR MOLECULAR DENSITY IN LOVE...............................................................................21 COLOR, AMBIVALENT TO THE GRAY FOLDS................................................................................................23 BLUE.............................................................................................................................................................25 APERTURE.....................................................................................................................................................27 FORGETTING GOES UNOBSERVED................................................................................................................28 SELF DISCOVERY..........................................................................................................................................30 KARL............................................................................................................................................................34 YOUR PERSONAL PRESCRIPTION INFORMATION............................................................................................38 THERE IS NOTHING TO PULL.......................................................................................................................40 FOUND POEM................................................................................................................................................42 HAIKU 2........................................................................................................................................................44 A COLLECTION OF CHICKADEES..................................................................................................................45 A LIST OF MY CHARACTERISTICS I DO AND DO NOT LIKE........................................................................47 TROUBLE SHOOTING..................................................................................................................................49 RETURN ADDRESS UNKNOWN......................................................................................................................51 MERITOCRACY..............................................................................................................................................54 I KEEP FORGETTING.....................................................................................................................................56 AISLE 12.......................................................................................................................................................58 I’M AFRAID, BUT OF NOTHING I CAN SEE..................................................................................................60 CANNED PEACHES........................................................................................................................................62 I’M A SQUISHY SACK...................................................................................................................................63 SUNDAY........................................................................................................................................................65 VALUE MENU (DOLLAR POEM).....................................................................................................................66 MY OFFICE IS ALWAYS IN THE SAME PLACE................................................................................................68 TRENDING NOW:..........................................................................................................................................70 LIMITED SYNESTHESIA LIABILITY.............................................................................................................72 4 HAIKU 3........................................................................................................................................................74 FOUND POEM................................................................................................................................................75 LOST IN TARGET...........................................................................................................................................77 JAR OF JAR OF PICKLES................................................................................................................................78 5 INTRODUCTION As an individual with dyslexia and anxiety, I ache while I read, I read while I ache, I am always uncomfortable and at a loss for words to explain why. Despite this, words have never become my nemesis, instead they are delicate shards of language I enjoy sorting and resorting on the floor of my subconscious. I often lose a shard or two in the carpeting just to find it days later as a sliver in my toes. As the daughter of a careless machinist I am all too familiar with picking metal chips out of my feet and speaking to someone who isn’t truly listening. During a recent conversation with a fast talking, loud laughing, entrepreneurial studies major, the thick, balding boy was frustrated with the limiting nature of the English language and wished for a refund, store credit or at least a 10% discount for manufacturer defect. I understood on some level. I too am frustrated by the phonetic and spelling misalignment in English. At the beginning of my graduate career I was inspired by this frustration, I decided to create an entirely new way of writing. In a piece I call Linear Landscapes, I experiment with writing with the phonetic alphabet. To enhance the alien experience and bring to mind the process of decoding I created unique hand carved stamps to represent each letter of the phonetic alphabet. I used different color families to represent vowels from consonants and assigned colors to specific letters. This poem was written out on a long strip of paper to represent the flow of words coming out from the mouth and was long enough to