STRANGE HUMOR THE PASSING PARADE According to the Wall Street Journal report, NEWS OF THE WEIRD Ashlynd said, “No, Mommy, I was shopping.” (1) Woodstock, Vermont, police arrested a [Wall Street Journal, 12-23-2016] 28-year-old man for bank robbery in January, with a key piece of evidence coming to their PEOPLE DIFFERENT FROM US attention when a disapproving Vermonter noted “Every major event in my life has been about a paper coffee cup not in its proper recycling insects,” Aaron Rodriques, 26, told The New bin. The cup held the robber’s holdup note and York Times in December, home in New York DNA. (2) A 46-year-old man was arrested in City during a winter break from his doctoral December after an evening at the Sands Casino research at Purdue University on the “sweet in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, and charged with tergal secretions” of German cockroaches, and leaving a server a non-monetary “tip” -- of a on his way to buy a supply of crickets and Valium pill. [Valley News (Lebanon, N.H.), 1-12- hornworms. (“Hornworms,” he said, have an 2017] [Morning Call (Allentown), 12-30-2016] “amazing defense” where they “eat tobacco for the nicotine, which they exhale as a gas to scare LEADING ECONOMIC INDICATORS away predators.”) “When I’m feeling stressed -- The British think tank High Pay Centre out,” Rodriques said, he might take one out reported in January that the average CEO to “calm me down.” He met his first girlfriend among the U.K.’s top 100 companies (in the when she was attracted to his pet giant African Financial Times Stock Exchange index) earns millipede (as long as a human forearm), but the equivalent of around $1,600 an hour -- admits that “for the vast majority” of time in meaning that a 12-hour-a-day boss will earn, school, “I was alone.” [New York Times, 12-29- by mid-day Jan. 4, as much money as the 2016] typical worker at his firm will earn the entire year. (Around the same time, the anti-poverty organization Oxfam reported, to an astonished BY CHUCK SHEPHERD press, that eight men -- six Americans, headed by Bill Gates -- have the same total “net worth” as the 3.6 billion people who comprise the COMPELLING EXPLANATIONS poorest half of the planet.) [The Guardian, 1-3- -- In Hong Kong in December, Mr. Lam Chung- 2017] [New York Times, 1-16-2017] kan, 37, pleaded guilty to stealing a bottle of -- A “disturbingly large” (according to one report) a co-worker’s breast milk at work and drinking number of smartphone apps are available it -- but only to help with “stress” in his job as a devoted to calculating how much the user has computer technician. Undermining the health- “earned” per day and per year during restroom improvement explanation was a photo Lam sent breaks answering nature’s calls while at work. the woman, showing himself in an aroused state. Australia’s News Limited’s rough calculation [South China Morning Post, 12-21-2016] estimated $1,227 for someone making $55,000 -- In December, James Leslie Kelly, 52, and with a year, but results might vary since there are so a 37-conviction rap sheet dating to 1985, filed a many apps: Poop Salary, ToiletPay, Log-Log, federal lawsuit in Florida claiming that his latest Paid 2 Poo, Pricy Poop, Poop Break and perhaps others. [News.com.au via New York Post, 12-9- brush with the law was Verizon’s fault and not 2016] his. Kelly was convicted of stealing the identity of another James Kelly and taking more than PRECOCIOUS $300 in Verizon services. He bases his case on In December, Ashlynd Howell, age 6, of Little the Verizon sales representative’s having spent Rock, Arkansas, deftly mashed her sleeping “an hour and a half” with him -- surely enough mother’s thumbprint onto her phone to unlock the time, he says, to have figured out that he was Amazon app and order $250 worth of Pokemon Insect enthusiast Aaron Rodriques not the James Kelly he was pretending to be. He toys. Mom later noticed 13 email confirmations seeks $72 million. [WFTV (Orlando), 1-2-2016] READ THE FULL NEWS OF THE WEIRD DAILY AT and asked Ashlynd if something was amiss. WWW.WEIRDUNIVERSE.NET. OR SEND ITEMS TO [email protected] David Mayman fl ying his Jet Pack over London proud member of Tony Farina, Javier PRODUCTION/DESIGN EDITORIAL Calendar Editor Bustillos, Jan Jezioro, jamie moses Publisher Moose Jr. James Hufnagel Editorial jamie moses GENERAL MANAGER SALES [email protected] Editor-In-Chief Dr. Chitra Selvaraj Greg Ipolito 716-380-5303 Calendar Frank Parlato Publisher's Assistant Dr. Chitra Selvaraj 716 534-0771 [email protected] Theater Editor Karen Fleig CIRCULATION Art /Artviews artseditor@ Anthony Chase CONTRIBUTORS Sharon Kaiser artvoice.com P.O. Box 695, buffalo, ny 14205 | artvoice.com | 716.881.6604 | classified ads 716.881.6124 advertising: [email protected] 716 534-0771 • [email protected] 716-380-5303 Copyright © by Artvoice Reporter, 2016. Artvoice is published in association with the Niagara Falls Reporter, South Buff alo News and Front Page Cover design: C.V.S. 2 Feb 2 – Feb 8, 2017 | artvoice.com GET THE LED OUT Town Ballroom Thurs Feb 2nd 7pm $24/$29 Get The Led Out is a Led Zeppelin tribute band from Philadelphia that delivers that plays Zeppelin ‘s studio recordings with all the bells THU 2/2 and whistles. The band can rock and lead vocalist Paul Sinclair really delivers. MATT RICHARDS & LEONARD OUZTS Seneca Casino Thurs Feb 2nd 8pm $20 Matt Richards and Leonard Ouzts are stand-up comics from New York City and tell hilarious stories of living in the Big Apple and THU 2/2 their struggles in the dating world. You may have seen them on the television show “Joking Off”, an improve comedy show on MT V. FLO RIDA BOYZ II MEN SATISFACTION: THE INTERNATIONAL ROLLING STONES SHOW CLUB CAN’T END OF FEB HANDLE ME THE ROAD Riviera Theatre Sat Feb 4th $30 11 MAR 3 Satisfaction is the international tribute show dedicated to the Stones. This glamorous has toured since 2001 with over 2000 SAT 2/4 SAT performances. If you love the Rolling Stones’ music, and who COUNTRY LINEUP UPCOMING doesn’t, head to North Tonawanda and get some Satisfaction. ENTERTAINMENT DUSTIN SOLD OUT RUMOURZ PLAYS RUMOURS 40TH ANNIVERSARY TOUR FEB LYNCH BAD COMPANY 10 Tralf Music Hall Sat Feb 4th 8pm $20 MAR 9 JESSIMAE PELUSO Rumourz re-creates one of the greatest albums in rock history: FEB 16 Fleetwood Mac’ s masterpiece “Rumours.” They perform the SPAZMATICS FEB SAT 2/4 SAT whole album, track by track, in storybook fashion complete with TRACE 17 HD video. ADKINS LARRY THE CABLE GUY FEB 18 RICK STRAUSS AND FOR PEACE QUARTET APR 7 Pausa Art House Sat Feb 4th $7 JOAN JETT AND THE BLACKHEARTS MAR 11 Guitarist Rick Strauss leads his quartet performing original JANA compositions and jazz standards with the best of them. Lisa KRAMER BILL ENGVALL MAR 18 SAT 2/4 SAT Hasselback, Jim Coleman and Abdul-Rahman Quadir lend stel- lar support to one of the best jazz guitarists in town. APR 21 BRET MICHAELS MAR 24 HOME SAFE truTV Impractical Jokers Waiting Room Wed Feb 8th 8pm $10/$12 COLT ‘Santiago Sent Us’ Tour APR 1 FORD Starring the Tenderloins After Dark presents Home Safe, Life Lessons, Chase Huglin, Sleepfirst and The Second String are rock bands performing in APR 28 NIGHT RANGER APR 15 WED 2/8 one big show. Five different styles of rock in one big reasonable priced event. FOR A COMPLETE LINEUP OF EVENTS AND MORE INFORMATION, VISIT DELLAGORESORT.COM MOON HOOCH Buffalo Iron Works Wed Feb 8th 9pm $10 Must be 21 or older to attend events at The Vine. Moon Hooch is a band from New York City that blends an intox- delLagoResort.com icating blend of virtuosic jazz, groovy funk and pulse-pounding NOW OPEN WED 2/8 electronic dance music. The band started playing in the NYC Subway and became so popular that NYPD banned them from EXIT 41, NEW YORK STATE THRUWAY performing in the subways because they couldn’t handle the big crowds. MUST BE 21 OR OLDER. FOR HELP WITH PROBLEM GAMBLING FULL LIST OF VENUES page CALL 877.8.HOPENY OR TEXT HOPENY (467369). artvoice.com | Feb 2 – Feb 8, 2017 2017 3 Mosey Kickoff Event Next Thursday at Kleinhans By Tony Farina Acea Mosey, the public administrator run- and able to serve them as surrogate judge, ning for Erie County surrogate judge, will replacing Judge Barbara Howe who will officially launch her campaign on Thursday retire at the end of the year after a stellar at Kleinhans Music Hall with a grand fund- judicial career. raiser featuring signature dishes from 15 of Mosey is a graduate of Amherst Central the area's top restaurants and musical enter- High School, Canisius College, and Western tainment, a party that promises to be one of Michigan University's Thomas M. Cooley the year's top political events. Law School. As public administrator for Mosey will be welcoming supporters having the last 12 years, she has administered already secured the endorsements of the estates that would have otherwise remained Democratic, Republican, and Conservative un-administered; protected the property of executive committees but she's continuing to decedent's from loss and theft; made burial take her case to the people, traveling across arrangements when needed, and liquidated the county to let them know she feels that assets at public sale and distributed assets with her experience as public administrator to heirs.