#1082 • December 5, 2012 the holiday party of the twelves Sidetrack Lots of elves! give-aways! 12.12.12 Wednesday, December 12th, 2012 Holiday Cheer. Doors open to the public at 8pm. No cover. 3349 N. Halsted SidetrackChicago.com That Guy by Kirk Williamson This from Paté over at Parlour: Hello, and an Absolut OUTrageous tasting at 11. Darling! I am throwing a little party on Wed., Dec. 12, from 7-10 p.m. It’s a supply drive to So check this shit out. I just got a new car, benefit my dogs at FOUND. Asking people to finally. It’s awesome. A 2004 Chrysler Concorde remember our four-legged friends this holiday or, as a friend recently called it, a “land shark.” season, and to bring items like dog treats, And boy were they right. Anyway, since I last bleach, new or gently used blankets and towels, owned a car a few months ago, I forgot just etc. TWO DOLLAR DRINKS! If there is a chance how much this job keeps me on the go. Take you might give it a mention I’d be so grateful as last Friday for instance. I started at @mosphere always... Thanks Kirk! to revel in the grand opening of @mosphere Best, Paté 2.0 (check out their psychedelic new tables!), stopped into Target to buy a princess castle Done :) for my niece, witnessed a staged teabagging at the TPAN Barlesque VI finals at North End Despite the freakishly warm temps this weekend, (congrats to Jackhammer’s Mark for raising in I’m forced to ponder if more bars open in excess of $8,000!), ran a spontaneous errand to the cold of winter. Three—count ‘em—three Banana Video to purchase some on-sale porn, anniversaries of note are coming up that you and covered the Hot Jock contest at Crew ... all should help celebrate. Both Scarlet and Club within two hours! No wonder I’m frequently too Krave are marking five years. Scarlet brings in exhausted to write this column! super skater Johnny Weir, Sun., Dec. 9 and Club Krave gives a wicked drag show starring Lindsey Anyway, see Felix or Mariano at Wheels of Devereaux, Serina DeVine, Lindsay Bryant, Chicago, 6229 N. Western Ave., 773-262-7500 Theresa Dawn, Brandi Wyne, and many more. If for your next ride. Make sure to tell them Kirk you like ‘em a little older, commemorate 29 years Williamson sent you. Please tell them that! at Berlin, Sun., Dec. 9 with the Berlin Family DJs [email protected] PUBLISHER Tracy Baim ASSISTANT PUBLISHER nightspots Terri Klinsky MANAGING EDITOR #1082 • December 5, 2012 Kirk Williamson ADVERTISING REPRESENTATIVES Terri Klinsky, Kirk Williamson, Amy Matheny, Christopher Cheuvront MAIN COVER IMAGE NATIONAL ADVERTISING REPRESENTATIVE Santa Speedo Run Rivendell Media 212-242-6863 organizers Jeffery DIRECTOR OF NEW MEDIA Colgan & Karl Jean Albright Sponholtz OFFICE Photo by Anthony Ripley Caine Meade PHOTOGraphY Mel Ferrand, Kat Fitzgerald, Kirk, Kizzy, Anthony Meade, DJ Res-5 CAST OF CHARACTERS C.J., Homer Marrs, AK Miller, Marc “Moose”Moder, Copyright 2012 Windy City Media Group/Lambda Publications Inc. All rights reserved. Jennifer Parello, Randy Pubert, Steven Toushin Reprint by permission only. Back issues available for $3 per issue (postage included). 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While we encourage [email protected] readers to support the advertisers who make this newspaper possible, Nightspots/Windy City Times cannot accept responsibility for advertising claims. /nightspots Grand opening: Check out those crazy lava lamp tables! @MOSPHERE 2.0 Photos by Kirk TPAN’s final tease for Barlesque V. Guess who raised over $25,000! NORTH END Photos by Kirk 8 nightspots December 5, 2012 Grand opening: Check out those crazy lava lamp tables! TPAN’s final tease for Barlesque V. Guess who raised over $25,000! DANCING ABOUT ARCHITECTURE by Marc “Moose” Moder A NEW TRADITIONAL XMAS LIST FROM MOOSE When it comes to love of tradition, there are two types of people in this world: those who love traditions; and those who love to start them, then love traditions. Being the prematurely young patriarch of the family, I’ve become more and more of the latter, tossing aside my childhood family’s old traditions and tweaking them to fit my style and make them my own. Same when it comes to holiday music. I could listen to the Mormon Tabernacle’s Joy To the World or Willie Nelson’s Pretty Paper for the 30th year in a row, or I can toss in newer holiday tunes by fun. or Rosie Thomas to keep the season bright and make new memories. That said, one of my favorite new traditions is trolling through the last few months’ releases and putting together a sound (double meaning) holiday shopping list. So tear this out and hit Amazon or a great local retailer and go to town. For the hipster: Sufjan Stevens’ Silver and Gold casually pulls together 59 tracks over 5 discs, mostly lovely and sweet. I’d usually say pick and choose over iTunes, but for less than $20, it makes it look like you spent way more. For the classic queen: Tracey Thorn’s Tinsel and Lights is a mostly originals affair with a smattering of covers and standards. Exactly what we’d expect from a pop pioneer who’s never bowed to tradition or expectations. As expected, it’s a joyous release filled with heartfelt sentiment and a touch of sorrow. That sorrow fades fast when you realize it’s the first time her partner in life and Everything But the Girl, Ben Watt plays on a few tracks. Sweet reunion. For the reality show junkie: Pick up the surprisingly good CeeLo Green’s Magic Moment or DWTStars’ Katherine Jenkins’ This Is Christmas. CeeLo’s first Xmas CD provides even more fun than you thought he was capable of. This columnist expected a quickly thrown together novelty CD, but what he (I) got was a rollicking holiday party wrapped in classic bow. Jenkins doesn’t disappoint, though I had higher expectations of the classically trained opera singer than I did of the “Fuck You” guy. For the teen girl or the gay man who acts like one: Surprisingly great CDs by Ke$ha, Christina Aguilera, Rihanna and Ellie Goulding just hit stores and all of them are much better than their last releases. I like this trend. C’mon Britney, your turn. For the parents (but just the cool ones): Get the Complete Beatles Vinyl Box, Led Zeppelin’s Celebration Day (live CD), or Neil Young and Crazy Horse’s Psychedelic Pill. All three are lengthy and satisfying affairs for the die hards in your life. And finally, shopping local is one of my all-time favorite traditions, so go pick up the rockabilly tinged Mister Casanova by Jinx Titanic and the Ladykillers or the heartfelt new Stephen Leonard album, His Fire. Mister Casanova finds Jinx peeling away a bit of the punk and a bit of the gay for a more sexy bisexual party where everyone’s “coming”. No worries, it’s not a huge departure, just slightly more Wanda Jackson than Iggy Pop. Leonard goes way beyond his past on his phenomenal concept CD, telling a full story anyone—especially gay men—can identify with. Both are easily the best of an already great catalog for both Chicago gay boys. 10nightspots December 5, 2012 “I’m baaaaack!” Karaoke by Creagh MON TUES TUE WATCH FOR DATES Jackhammer Bistro After Dark Spin 10pm-4am Cocktail 10pm-2am (773) 743-5772 9pm-1am (773) 525-2522 (773) 327-7711 (773) 477-1420 WED WED THU THU THU Hideaway Holiday Club Crew Four Farthings The Call 9:30pm-1:30am 9:30pm-1:30am 9:30pm-1:30am 9:30pm-1:30am 7pm-11:30pm (708) 488-9382 (773) 348-9600 (773) 784-CREW (773) 935-2060 (773) 334-2525 FRI FRI FRI SAT Bobby Love’s Hideaway Halsted Harp Coppolino’s 9:30pm-1:30am 10pm-2:30am 9:30pm-1:30am 10:30pm-2:30am (773) 525-1200 (708) 488-9382 (773) 348-3665 (773) 735-8647 SAT SAT SUN SAT SUN Four Farthings Christina’s Hideaway Bobby Love’s The Sofo Tap 9:30pm-1:30am 10pm-2am 9pm-1am 9pm-Midnight 8pm-Midnight (773) 935-2060 (773) 463-1768 (708) 488-9382 (773) 525-1200 (773) 784-7636 Now contact us at 773-720-7347 or [email protected] Join Creaoke on Facebook www.CreaokeKaraoke.net Greased up and crispy at the Butter Ball. HUNTERS Photos by Pubert You’re in Martika’s kitchen now, bitch. Look it up. It’s an ‘80s thing. THE CALL Photos by Pubert 12 nightspots December 5, 2012 Oh, the sublime fuzziness of the Hot Jock Contest! CREW Photos by Kirk BIJOU’S SATURDAY DECEMBER 15 FEATURING HOSTED BY THE BIJOU BOYS BRYAN DOWLING 10 pm to midnight 312-943-5397 WWW.BIJOUWORLD.COM photo by Alan Spiers DEEP TISSUE a touching new column by C.J.