n ditio his E In T FosterEd Arizona A Huge Gift Given In Arizona Foster youth education in Arizona got a huge lift in the form of a 500,000 dollar gift to FosterEd Arizona 14 from the Bob & Renee Parsons Foundation. Joy Hankins Hair Products for Foster Families Joy Hankins started The Joy of Curls to help foster families with styling hair. That has since blossomed into her donating hair products to foster families and more. 17 Lutheran Child &Family Services of Illinois Dismantling Systemic Racism Lutheran Child & Family Services of Illinois spent two years studying systemic racism in foster care and how to tear it apart brick by ugly brick. 20 Sarah Malik Foster Kid Creates Peer Tutoring Program Sarah Malik saw a need for an online peer tutoring program for foster youth. So she created one. Find out how she sprang into action for her fellow foster kids. 23 Sherry Hursey An Enchanting Movie Actress Sherry Hursey stops by Foster Focus to tell share her latest project; Lilly’s Light, a foster care and adoption 30 film with the support of the Dave Thomas Foundation. Meet the Team Owner/Creator/Editor Chris Chmielewski Fullfilment Coordinator Trisha Chmielewski Additional Editing/Design/Photos 6 8 Carolyn Walker Columnists Rhonda Sciortino Sandie Morgan Dr. Capri Cruz Richard Villasana Chris Chmielewski Section Partners 10 12 Centene Advertising Sales Chris Chmielewski [email protected] (570)-538-3608 Print House 26 Bayard Printing 1 Maynard Street Williamsport, PA 17701 www.bayardprinting.com Subscription costs $40.00 one year digital plus 4 Special print issues $20.00 4 Special print isssues* $20.00 one year digital* *subscriptions available online only www.FosterFocusMag.com/subscribe Publisher Foster Focus Magazine www.FosterFocusMag.com 608 Main Street Watsontown, PA 17777 Foster Focus ; A Monthly Look at the Foster Care Industry, is a Foster Focus (570)-538-3608 LLC production. Foster Focus is an unbiased editorial/news publication, there are www.FosterFocusMag.com no affiliations with any groups (religious, political etc.) information obtained in Foster Focus should not be considered as a resource for pending court cases. The views expressed by Columnists, Contributors and advertisers do not necessarily reflect the views of Foster Focus or Editor, Chris Chmielewski. As a foster parent, I learned long ago that I simply cannot do it by myself. Foster parenting is hard. To me, it has been one of the most difficult lifestyles I have ever led. Let there be no mistake, foster parenting is a unique lifestyle. A lifestyle that few will ever understand or appreciate. It is a lifestyle that your family members, your friends, those you work with, those you are closest to will never truly understand. For you see, when you bring children who have experienced great trauma and experience anxieties into your home and into your family, it can be difficult. It can be challenging. It can be stressful on many levels. And when the child who you have come to love deeply with all of you heart and has become an important member of your family leaves, for In This whatever reason that might be, yes your heart does break, and you grieve their loss in Edition: your life. Several times each week, I tell foster parents that their lifestyle is indeed so unique that I Can’t their friends, family members, and those closest to them will truly not understand what Do It All they do as foster parents, why they chose this lifestyle, and why it can be so emotionally exhausting at times. Indeed, my own family members do not truly appreciate why my By Myself wife and I became foster parents, and why we have made the sacrifices that come along with caring for children in crisis in our home over the years. Yes, I can't do it by myself, and I don't have all the answers when it comes to foster par - enting. That's just one reason why I surrounding myself with other foster parents. Whether it is at my own local foster parent support group, that meets once a month, or when I meet other foster parents as I travel across the nation, speaking at events, and holding training seminars at private agencies and state led foster parent conferences. No one truly understands a foster parent like another foster parent. As a foster parent, you will also need a support group. To be sure, your friends and fam - ily members can and hopefully will offer you support as a foster parent, and will be there to help out in times of struggle. Yet, you will find that you will need another group of people to surround yourself with. For you see, your own friends and family members may at some point question whether or not you should be a foster parent, whether out of concern for your well-being, confusion about what you are doing, or maybe even from Dr. John DeGarmo is the founder their own guilt they might feel because they may feel that they are not doing enough, themselves. These questions from your friends and family members are normal towards and director of The Foster Care foster parents. I have heard them time and time again from dear friends and from my Institute,. Dr. John, as he is known own family. You might also have found, or will soon find, that you are not invited to all by, is TEDx Talk speaker, and con - the parties, gatherings, and events that you once used to be invited to. You may find that ducts seminars and consults across your friends are now doing things with others, and that there is a distance growing the world on foster care, child sex between you and others. Some may feel that the children you are caring for are “too trafficking, adoption, and child wel - rowdy”, and you are no longer wanted in their homes. Soon, you may find yourself lonely, isolated, and with no one to talk to. As I noted earlier, no one will truly under - fare related issues. stand you and what you do like another who has walked in your shoes and lived your life style; another foster parent. He is also the author of several books, including the book The There are a number of foster parent support groups and associations across the nation. A Foster Care Survival Guide, and few of these organizations may be national ones, while many others are, comprised of Helping Foster Children in School. foster parent, like you. Either way, you will benefit by being in a support organization, as they will provide you with not only support, but information, fellowship, and important insight that will help you be a better foster parent. Dr. John, and his wife Dr. Kelly DeGarmo, who hails from Australia, Support groups and associations offer you the opportunity to develop relationships with are the parents of 6 children, includ - other foster parents. These relationships will are wonderful occasions for you to validate ing adopting three from foster care, that your own experiences and emotions you feel as a foster parent. Fellow foster par - and have bee foster parents to over ents will also be able to discuss common experiences and common concerns related to 60 children. the foster children living in their homes, as well as share ideas and resources with each other. No one will truly understand and appreciate what you are experiencing and feel then other foster parents. drjohndegarmofostercare.com Many associations meet once a month, while others may meet every other month. It is important that you attend these meetings, as it not only keeps you connected with other foster parents, and the resources they might have, but many associations include training during their meetings. Training will take several forms; CPR certification, drug and 6 Foster Focus Volume 10 Issue 11/12 www.FosterFocusMag.com alcohol awareness, behavior modifica - tions, etc. The hours spent in training will go towards the yearly amount of hours needed in order to remain certified as a foster parent. When some of my friends and family members wonder why I continue to bring children into my home, or tell me they could never do what I do for some reason or another; when I grapple with a the grief of a child leaving my home and family; when confusion and frustration from a flawed system threatens to sweep over me; for whatever situation I might be struggling with as a foster parent, I know that I can find a listening ear, and under - standing heart, and a comforting word from my fellow foster parents, both at the local and national level. When some of my friends and family members wonder why I continue to bring children into my home, or tell me they could never do what I do for some reason or another; when I grapple with a the grief of a child leaving my home and family; when confusion and frustration from a flawed system threatens to sweep over me; for whatever situation I might be struggling with as a foster parent, I know that I can find a listening ear, and under - standing heart, and a comforting word from my fellow foster parents, both at the local and national level. If you are not aware of a foster parent association or support group in your area, contact your foster care agency or local child welfare agency and ask them if there is such a group that you could join in your area. If for some reason there is not a support group in your area ask your agency if there is one nearby, or go ahead and get online and do a search for one near where you live.