JOURNAL OF CRITICAL REVIEWS ISSN- 2394-5125 VOL 7, ISSUE 07, 2020 MARRIAGECUSTOMS OF THE MISING COMMUNITY PUNTERAPPUN PEGU Majuli, Assam ABSTRACT: Marriages are one of the most important rituals observed around the world. Marriages create a new social relationships and reciprocal rights between spouse and between each of the kin of the other. The Misings practice their own traditional marriages. Marriage is called ‘Midang’ in the Mising language. There are different types of Midang in the Mising community. The paper is an attempt to highlight the different types of marriages performed in the Mising society since the early days. KEYWORDS: Mising, midang, rituals, social, relationships. INTRODUCTION: Marriage is a legally and socially sanctioned union of two individuals, usually between man and woman. It is regulated by laws, rules, customs, beliefs and attitudes that prescribe the rights and duties of the partners and accords status to their off springs (Encyclopaedia Britannica). Thus marriage is a commitment between two individuals in an intimate relationship who promise to care for each other human needs. The conditions of good marriages can be viewed from two perspectives- secular or religious. Secular views include love, trust, honesty, integrity, understanding etc. Whereas an added element i.e. faith in God (Allah, Buddha or another) is present in religious perspective. Thus a spiritual and ethical companionship is also vital in marriage. ‘The Ethics of Marriage’ in Jerome Nathanson’s essay outlines conditions of a good marriage in a secular context, he names three needs that marriage fulfils- security, understanding and genuine concern for the partner. Marriage is a maturing experience as it takes maturity to truly love someone. But this process of reaching to the point of finally achieving complete maturity is never finished. Thus a good marriage is a relationship through which one can grow until the end of the days. A good marriage is thus the source for a couple to envisage and make an increased contribution to the society at large.( Master’s thesis writing, Dissertation on marriage, May 2020) Endogamy, the practise of marrying someone from within one’s own tribe or group is the oldest social regulation of marriage. But with passing of time, many types of marriages have evolved. Whereas the cultural pressure to marry someone from within one’s social, economic and ethical group is still very strongly enforced in many societies. Marriage ceremonies include symbolic rites often sanctified by a religious order, which are to confer good fortune on the couple. This sacred union may be expressed by the joining of hands, an exchange of rings or chain or the tying of garments etc. However these elements vary greatly among different societies and components such as time, place and circumstances. These traditions are to a certain extent shaped by the religious beliefs and practises found in the society. Objectives: The paper is an attempt – to study the traditional marriage types of the Misings. And the rites and rituals associated to it. Methodology: The study is based on critical use of primary and secondary source. The primary source includes, personal observations. The secondary sources are books, journals, articles and magazines. Discussion: The Misings are the early inhabitants of Northeast India, basically Assam. They ethnically belonged to the Tibeto- Burmese group of Mongoloid stock and originally belonged to the hill groups of Nishi, Monyongs, Pa:dams and Pasis etc. they are believed to have migrated down to the plains in search of better economic and social life. They are riverine settlers and settled along the banks of Brahmaputra Valley and are mostly found in the districts of Majuli, Dhemaji, Jorhat, Dibrugarh etc. Like every other society, the Misings consider marriage as sacred, and they have been following their traditional customs of marriage since time immemorial. In the Mising kinship system ‘Opin’ plays a very important role. The term ‘Opin’ can be 3995 JOURNAL OF CRITICAL REVIEWS ISSN- 2394-5125 VOL 7, ISSUE 07, 2020 considered equal to the term clan, which is used to designate the Hindu Gotra system. Although a large number of the Mising population have adopted them to Hinduism, however they have retained their traditional clan system. According to this, a boy of a particular Mising clan cannot marry a girl of the same clan bearing similar surnames. A boy of a particular group generally limits his selections of bride amongst a marriageable clan belonging to his own group. Marriage between class of different groups are not prohibited. The crosscousins marriage is prevalent among the Misings. Marriage is called ‘Midang’ in the community. They believe the thought that getting into marriage rituals means to enter into a new phase of life along with the taking up of responsibilities. Different types of marriage prevalent among the Misings are: Dugla Lanam: Dugla lanam basically means elopement. It is one of the most common type of love marriage in the society. It starts in love between a boy and a girl where there are objections to their marriages from the parents from both ends. The couple elopes and stays away from their homes. They stay as husband and wife and the boy doesn’t take her back to his home unless the parents along with the elders of both the families come to an agreement to their relationship. Negotiations take place between the two homes. The negotiations (called as ‘Dugtad’) take place by members of the boy’s family visiting the girls family with a pot of apong along with some betel nuts. They ask for the girl’s hands from the parents and try coming to terms. Daro Midang: This marriage is solemnized according to the standard social Mising customs. In this system the bride is selected by the parents of the bridegroom and the marriage is settled after the two parents agree to each other. It can also take place in the form of love marriage. Here the boy asks his parents to visit the girl’s parents and asks for her hand formally for marriage. This type of marriage is regarded as regular marriage in the community and is celebrated with big pomp. On the day of marriage, the bridegroom dresses up in traditional attire. The celebration includes feasting of pig based food along with Apong(the traditional rice beer of the Misings). After performing of the sacred matrimonial rituals, the newlyweds are allowed to dine together from the same plate accompanied by the two best men and the bridesmaid of the both. They also drink Apong (rice beer) from a single cup. However, at the moment widow and widower were not allowed to remain present. After the food, both the bride and the groom are allowed to take a bow in front of the elder persons and they bless the newlywed for long lasting life of togetherness. A new prepared ladder (ko:bang) is made for the newlywed couple to welcome on the first day of the marriage to the new home for the bride. Nearby the ladder, two pots of water and a bucket of rice on each side is kept, as they believe it to be the symbol of prosperous life. Kumsula-lanam: It is a formal marriage system, where only a brief ceremonial marriage is observed. Kumsula lanam is followed, when the marriage parties are in cable of bearing the expenses of ceremonial marriage. It takes place with a small budget and is attended by only close relatives. So:la Lanam: In the So:la Lanam event, the bride is forcefully taken and the marriage was solemnized without the consent of the bride. This practice took place in the early days and is not a recommended practice of the community. This happened when a girl rejects to the proposal of a boy. In the present scenario this type of practice has been abolished and not seen in the community. Duksasunam: This is a peculiar type of marriage where, when a boy and girl fall in love affairs but marriage doesn’t take place. In such a case the girl herself comes up to the groom’s home and stays over. Meanwhile the parents of the girls demand a marriage. A Kebang(a type of meeting among the elders) is called for with the family members of both the girl and the boy along with the village elders. The matter is discussed and if the boys is found guilty a large amount of money and property is to be paid to the girl’s family. However, this type of situation doesn’t arise if the boy agrees to marry the girl. Widow Remarriage: The introduction of the Widow Remarriage Act was a major change in the Indian society. Before remarrying was considered a taboo and the practice of sati to was prevalent. It was only with the untiring efforts of Iswar Chandra Vidyasagar, Raja Ram Mohan Roy that the widow remarriage act was enacted in 1861. Widow Remarriage is present in the Mising society. It takes place when the husband of a young girl dies at a young age. In such case, the family members of both families decide and discusses for the future of the widow. If both the family comes to 3996 JOURNAL OF CRITICAL REVIEWS ISSN- 2394-5125 VOL 7, ISSUE 07, 2020 an agreement the remarriage is approved. Sometimes the remarriage takes place with the younger unmarried brother of the deceased with the consent of the family members, Magbo Dugnam: This is a very interesting event in the mising society. Magbo dugnam is mainly based on marriage by service. ‘Magbo’ means brother-in-law in the Mising language. In this practice, the ‘Magbo’ is made to stay in the house of the to-be-bride and made to do odd jobs like going to the fields and ploughing of fields to building of house to preparing of firewood.