Purim 5777 ★ SPIEL ★ MEGILLAH ★ CARNIVAL ★ at PAS FUN FOR ALL AGES Bulletin March 2017 אדר–ניסן FROM THE RABBI RABBI ETHAN H. WITKOVSKY The Case of the Maltese Megillah was sitting in my office on a but she could sing. With no lead other dreary afternoon in March. It than “March 11,” The River and I had I was the time of day when most no choice but to wait till that Saturday. rabbis study Torah. I was deep into my favorite book: Single Malt. The When the night arrived, The River bottle was wrapped and I staked out the synagogue and in a tallis. The tallis watched for suspicious characters. keeps the whiskey The joint was hopping with more warm, the whiskey Jews than a Chinese restaurant on keeps me warm. Christmas. We saw two of NYC’s most Without warning, notorious criminals sneak into the old man Cosgrove building: Azi the Throat and Babyface burst into my office. Zuckerman. These were bad guys, the The sign on my door kind of criminals who could make you said Rabbi Wit: disappear and officiate the funeral. Private Detective; the sign on his baby The River and I were beginning to blues said we’re in trouble. According realize that this was bigger than we to Proverbs, a generous person will thought when a voice boomed behind be blessed, so I offered him a drink. us “alright youse two, inside now.” My When he declined, I knew something heart ran and hid behind my stomach. was seriously wrong. There’re only It was none other than Beryl the Boss; two things that can cook a rabbi’s of course he was involved! Nothing knish: empty pews and missing dues, happens in this city without Beryl’s and judging by the attendance last approval. The three crooks led us Park Avenue Synagogue Bulletin Shabbat, someone had been helping downstairs and showed us what they VOLUME 69 · NO. 7 themselves to the capital campaign. had done with the funds. The whole MARCH 2017 My suspicions were confirmed when congregation was there, most of them אדר–ניסן · ADAR/NISAN 5777 the rabbi sat down and said, “we wearing costumes to confuse the fuzz. have an Exodus 20:12 on our hands.” They were all celebrating a crime that From the Rabbi ................................................2 Missing money. This wasn’t going to was thwarted a thousand years ago. Purim 5777 ......................................................3 be as easy as the case of the missing Even old man Cosgrove was there, Capital Campaign ............................................4 Kiddush (Beryl’s office). I was going to laughing away. Apparently the heist Schedule of Religious Services & need reinforcements. was a hoax. I asked him, “what do you Shabbat at PAS ................................................6 call this rub?” He answered, “Purim.” Synagogue Family ........................................... 8 Caring Network ................................................9 I grabbed my new partner, Cantor So we poured ’em one, then we poured From the Education Team .............................10 Brook – but we all call her “The River” ’em another. Adult Classes & Events ..................................10 – and started talking to the usual Shapiro Audio Archive, Gallery ....................14 suspects. Our first stop was Cantor Purim Sameah! See you on the 11th! Youth Education & Events ............................15 Young Family Education ............................15 Lissek. She was one tough broad, but I PASECC .......................................................15 wouldn’t say that to her face because I Congregational School ................................16 like my nose where it is. She was also Camp ...........................................................16 mysterious. When we asked her if she Youth/RJNHS ............................................. 17 knew anything about the loot, she just PAS 20s & 30s ............................................. 17 Contributions .................................................18 said “they will appear on March 11 . .” Calendar .........................................................19 and then she started singing some A Look Ahead ...................................Back cover song about a three-cornered hat. The dame wasn’t playing with a full deck, pasyn.org/calendar GET UP-TO-THE-MINUTE INFORMATION ABOUT PAS PROGRAMS, EVENTS & SCHEDULE OF RELIGIOUS SERVICES AT WWW.PASYN.ORG/CALENDAR. 2 Park Avenue Synagogue Bulletin Purim 5777 at PAS Two days of fun, festive, and fabulous Purim SAT | MAR 11 SUN | MAR 12 antics! Rock on, 6:00 pm | Pre-Purim Party 9:00 am | Morning service with dress up, and enjoy | Youth and Day School Torah reading and Megillah Community Set your clocks ahead for Daylight worship and events Get a head start on Purim! Eat ice Savings Time, and don’t miss the cream and make a grogger to drown continuing Purim shenanigans. for all ages. out Haman’s name at the Megillah reading. Adults welcome, but 11:15 am | Purim Service for children may come on their own. Families with Young Children Join Cantor Rachel Brook and Eliana Cost: $10/child; no cost for adults. Light for a family Purim service with RSVP on pasyn.org. singing, scenes from the Purim Spiel, 6:45 pm | Ma’ariv & Havdalah and Megillah reading. Wear your costume! 7:00 pm | Spiel: Shul of Rock ☛ Bring your air guitar and dress for a 11:30 am | Quiet Purim rock party. What would Esther have worn to a Zeppelin concert? Imagine Carnival Mordechai as a Rolling Stone. If For children who need a quieter and nothing else, come as yourself wear- less stimulating environment. ing a flamboyant hat, an outrageous tie, or a wide-lapel jacket. Bring 12:00 pm | Purim Carnival money to put in our giant com- Celebrate Purim with games and munity tzedakah box for matanot activities for children of all ages. To l’evyonim, Purim gifts to the poor. start the fun without waiting in line, buy your tickets in advance at pasyn. 8:00 pm | Megillah Reading org. Hear the story of Purim in the origi- nal. Cheer Mordechai, boo Haman, cheer Esther, boo Zeresh! Approx 9:00 pm, after the Megillah Reading | Teen Purim Party The celebration will rock on. RSVP to Hallie to receive location. www.pasyn.org 212–369–2600 March 2017 Adar/Nisan 5777 3 CAPITAL CAMPAIGN IMPACT: TESTIMONIALS We gave to the Capital Campaign because . e hope these stories inspire you to participate in this once-in-a-generation opportunity to build our congregational home for the next generation by helping us reach our goal of 100% participation. Please make your gift by visiting pasyn.org/capitalcampaign or by contacting Laura Yamner at [email protected] or 212-369-4900, x138. CANTOR AZI SCHWARTZ AND MEL SCHWEITZER, BOARD OFFICER W Karen & Barry Linda Yarden & Jennifer & Adam Frankel Chris Smith Karol members since 1990 members since 2000 members since 2012 The Capital Campaign is a once-in- In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, We believe in cultivating a strong a-generation opportunity to make “the future belongs to those who Jewish life and Jewish identity for a tangible, long lasting investment believe in the beauty of their our children and place importance ensuring the continuity of our dreams.” From our family’s first on being part of a community that community. For all of the 27 years of days in the Orange Room through mirrors our values as parents and our membership, we have supported the years of Congregational School, as Jews. Park Avenue Synagogue PAS for ongoing expenditures, but travel education to Cuba, Israel and provides an enriching learning with this gift, we are laying a concrete the world, countless simchas and environment and is also a second (literally!) foundation to continue Shabbats, hours at the food pantry, home for our family. From Rabbi our community not only day to day book fairs and Mitzvah Days, we Cosgrove’s officiating our daughter and year to year, but generation to joined a community that welcomes Chloe’s baby naming to celebrating generation. This investment provides all with open arms and one where Shabbat at PAS, we have been spiritual and educational returns. It we can live our values. We believe welcomed into the community with is a testament to our dear friends and that this synagogue must continue open hearts. Both our children spent clergy so that together we can build to exhilarate, educate and animate their formative years at PASECC, and share in all the worship, learning, a spark for those here today and for where they were nurtured and and other inspiring experiences at generations to come. We contribute engaged, and the seed for the love PAS. because we dream of the future of of Judaism was planted. As a young Park Avenue Synagogue. family, we look forward to a lifetime of making memories, creating friendships, and contributing to the PAS community. 4 Park Avenue Synagogue Bulletin Deborah & James Nancy & Joshua Colleen Weis & Breznay Korff Martin Laiks members since 2011 members since 2005 members since 2012 Park Avenue Synagogue is a vital When we think of how meaningful For four years, our family has had part of our lives. We know that our Park Avenue Synagogue is in our lives, the wonderful experience of being support and the support of others like it was easy to decide to participate part of the Early Childhood Center. us will ensure a dynamic future for in this generation’s project for the Our daughters, Allison and Lara, the congregation. The construction of future. Our three children went have discovered a joy of learning and the Lifelong Learning Center and the to the ECC and are now in the Jewish tradition that inspires us every improvements to our existing building Congregational School. We are very day. The families of the ECC have an will allow the congregation to continue excited that our son Sam will become amazing bond, and we are excited to enriching the lives of our congregants a Bar Mitzvah next November. Our share our journeys as our children and will help sustain Park Avenue family has traveled on two Young continue their education.