Colliers for December 21, 1935 The apologetic late Vice-Presi­ dent in Of Thee I Sing, the dif­ PHOTOGRAPHS BY fident but ambitious Public IFOR THOMAS Collier's Staff Enemy Number Thirteen of Photogra pher Anything Goes—in brief, Victor Moore—is a comic success of national proportions. But his Scenes from the Broadway success, Anything Goes, with Victor Moore, good luck ends at the footlights. Public Enemy Number 13, trying In fact, offstage nothing goes desperately to raise his rating He Makes Anything Go By Kyle Crichton HE new test for writers is simple: armor and the knee pieces of my suit any author who can't write a funny were hitting me on the shins. Next week line for Victor Moore is adjudged I went down to the Opera House where "^ Tilliterate and expelled from the the head super didn't know me." Playwrights' Guild. Mr. Moore is prac­ Soon he was playing in everything. He tically fool-proof as a comedian. In his played with John Drew and Ada Rehan. current show, Anything Goes, he utters He played in such plays as the Country a few words in this manner: "I think we Cousins and Blue Jeans. After a few ought to bump him off." By themselves years he was a gentleman who came in the words are not hilarious. He might and said that the carriage awaited with­ as easily—and with equal effect—say, out. He was a hit. He had a cane. He "I think I'll shut the door." It would wore a black fedora. He wore an ulster make no difference; the audience would with a hood. Girls passed him on the be twisted up in knots just the same. street and nudged each other and looked What makes the difference is the Moore at him with star-struck eyes. He was technique. His voice is cracked and plain­ getting $3.50 a week. tive. He looks like a defeated heron who "I got four bucks but I had to kick is tentatively asserting his dignity for back fifty cents to Jim Wilson, the head the last time. His timing is marvelous. super. That's where that stuff started." He says, "I think . we ought . to- bumphimoff." He throws it off as if pre­ Crises on the Circuit pared to take it back at the slightest opposition. He carries his pudgy little Then he got a job with the Ideal Reper­ form with a waddle and his head, with tory Company on tour. The tour started the ridiculous hat perched up high and at Marlboro, Mass., and ended at East well to the front, is twisted fake-aggres­ Pepperell, Mass. Young Moore played sively to the side. One loud breath and a heavy, the villain, in such vehicles as he would disappear. He is Mr. Common Crawford's Claim, Nugget Nell and Lost People to the life. in London. They played in theaters where Moore will be sixty on his next birth­ the players could touch the top of the day. He was carrying a spear at the proscenium arch and where the scenei-y Grand Opera House in Boston back at the was made of calico. They got out of one time when Paul Revere was still an ac­ town by overlooking the hotel bill, but the tive memory. He was playing in George M. hotel manager wrote to the hotel man- , Cohan's Forty-Five Minutes from Broad­ ager in the next town and they got away way in 1905 when Fay Templeton was safely there only by taking their belong­ making her iirst farewell performance. ings out at one o'clock in the morning. He is still the surest-fire of all Broad­ The company manager dug up a country way comedians, a man of such genius retreat, a farm house, whither they hied that he could almost save Let 'Em Eat themselves in a horse-drawn bus and lived Cake by his own efforts. As Mr. Throttle- for two weeks on flour and beans. The bottom, the belabored and lost Vice-Presi­ actors disappeared one by one, escaping dent in Of Thee I Sing, he created a starvation by minutes. Moore managed character which has taken its place in to get his trunk out of the East Pepperell American folklore with Babbitt, Wal- theater several steps ahead of the sheriff. lingford and Caspar Milquetoast. His next job was with the Arthur G. He was a pretty funny kid even in his Sidman company as a juvenile. He got school days in Hammondton, N. J., but $10 a week and cakes. In this one he where fame first struck him was at the sang his first song. The critics were only Grand Dime, a famous Boston theater partially pleased. One gentleman wrote: of its time. Babes in Toyland came to "Mr. Moore sang one song. He mistook town and he got a job as a super. the noise in the rear of the house for ap­ "I must have been standing on a pav­ plause and inflicted a second verse." ing stone," says Mr. Moore, "because I What followed was a trip to the West was no taller in those days than I am Coast with Charles Callahan in the Ro­ now. The trouble was I picked the wrong mance of Coon Hollow. At Stockton, play. In this one the supers had to wear (Continued on page 62) PRODUCED BY UNZ.ORG ELECTRONIC REPRODUCTION PROHIBITED Colliers for December 21, 1935 45 on't risk an INFERIORITY COMPLEX A true story of a man who found that self-confidence is not a matter of education or luck E WAS GOOD in his job. No one cator, Dr. EHot, forty years president of H denied that. But he felt inferior Harvard. He made it a vital part of his to his associates. Most of them were great life work to assemble in one set college men. He envied them the mys­ the really worthwhile writings. These terious thing called "background." books place you on an equal footing Today he happens to be one of the with the best educated of your associates. principals of the business. But more im­ portant, he has lost his inferiority com­ LIBERAL EDUCATION AT plex. Instead of envying his once better YOUR FINGERTIPS informed associates he is their equal. 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I Miss Address PRODUCED BY UNZ.ORG ELECTRONIC REPRODUCTION PROHIBITED 46 Collier's tor December 21, 1935 Callingham''s Girl Continued from page g "A swell idea. I'll be seeing you." "And what do I know that is impor­ Young Marsten rose; they shook tant to Marsten?" asked Cantavo. hands and Cantavo took his place upon "Did you throw Callingham out of the the stand. He glanced at his watch. It restaurant tonight only because he was was nearly three. He swung into the fresh to Rosie?" last number of the night. Graham came "When I went to theological school >^ up to him as the music ceased. did a lot of outside reading," said Can­ "You didn't give Alpert any change," tavo. "Read a lot about the Greeks and he said. their oracles. They never said anything "Not a nickel," replied Cantavo. straight out. Suppose you quit imitat­ "Are you really going to the Garnet?" ing them." "Why not?" demanded Cantavo. "If you'd gone to prep school and "I didn't know. Seeing young Mar­ college with Marsten would you have sten with you I thought maybe you'd go told him about Callingham and Mary home early." Byran?" "What an old woman you are!" cried "Where did you pick that one up?" the big man.