ONE OF DENNIS COOPER’S FAVORITE BOOKS OF THE YEAR “From ‘contactless sex’ in 2050 to a ‘computer uprising’ not quite ‘as spectacular as you might think’ in 3000, the range of possibility slyly stuffed into the radiant miniatures comprising Little Hollywood never ceases to calmly sidestep expectation, to look again where other forms of ‘realistic’ narrative so often balk, and therein, through an all-too-accurate simulation of the many awkward interfaces and sales pitches that comprise our daily life under late capitalism, to break down the horseshit dork ride that our lives as barely breathing 2D dolls has always been and always will be.” — Blake Butler author of Three Hundred Million & Scorch Atlas “Little Hollywood forbids passivity. It inspires the reader to embody myriad roles as each slice-of-existence script buttresses against the next. With these seemingly simple tragicomic scenarios, Jinnwoo reveals a complex truth – we are all actors becoming whatever character the situation dictates. We exist as dispersed fragments, and only by grouping these fragments together can we understand who and what we are. Little Hollywood is among the most singular and exciting books I’ve experienced in years.” — Matthew Revert author of Basal Ganglia and Human Trees “Little Hollywood is a lot of things, it’s snarky, awkward, unsettling, & inventive, but above all else it’s a hell of a lot of fun. Jinnwoo gives us a cast of disparate characters, the illustrated paper dolls are a riot!, and a strange well of scenes to draw from. You’ll be smirking, cutting, and pasting in no time.” — A.S. Coomer author of The Fetishists and Memorabilia “Little Hollywood blows my mind, how perfectly funny and sad, silly and deep it is. I almost can’t believe how special and good of a book it is. I read it twice in a week, and look forward to reading it again.” — Big Bruiser Dope Boy author of Foghorn Leghorn & Your First Real Boyfriend & Other Poems This book may not be reproduced in whole or in part, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review, without permission in writing from the author or publisher. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise), without prior permission of the publisher. Requests for permission should be directed to 1111@1111press. com, or mailed to 11:11 Press LLC, 4757 15th Ave S., Minneapolis, MN 55407. Many thanks to Sam Pink who read an early manuscript and assisted in the Little Hollywood editing process. Portions of this book first appeared inNew York Tyrant Magazine, Gay Death Trance, and Blue Arrangements. Cover & Interior Art by Jinnwoo Design by Tyler Crumrine LCCN: 2019950267 eBook: 978-1-948687-15-7 Paperback: 978-1-948687-14-0 FIRST EDITION 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 Little Hollywood BY Jinnwoo Copyright © 2019 Benjamin ‘Jinnwoo’ Webb All rights reserved Little Hollywood Instructions: It’s open audition day at the Little Hollywood talent agency. Assemble an actor and select a script for them to audition with. Sit back, cross your legs, breathe, be judgemental. Action, etc. Script #1 | Page 1 Two Porcelain Cats. INT. CHARITY SHOP. DAY. WILLIAM enters the charity shop. He approaches the counter where TOD is arranging novelty keyrings in a display. WILLIAM places a plastic bag on the counter. He recently cleared out his teenage bedroom, but only felt emotionally ready to part with his copy of The Communist Manifesto and his ‘Honey to the B’ by Billie Piper CD. WILLIAM Hello. I would like to donate these, please. I don’t know if anyone will want them. TOD Thank you. TOD takes the bag and examines the contents. TOD Very eclectic. Something for everyone here! TOD smiles. WILLIAM wants to laugh, or at least smile back, but- WILLIAM Well, thanks. WILLIAM crumples away from the counter and pretends to browse a nearby shelf of knick-knacks. He subtly practises the smile he should have done. To make friends with someone like TOD. TOD was vaguely funny, and comforting. TOD would make a good friend for WILLIAM. WILLIAM considers striking up another conversation, but can’t think of what might make a good topic. He suddenly can’t think of anything happening in the news, or anything that happened ever. He picks up two porcelain cats from the shelf of knick- knacks. They are both blue and white, but they are not a set. He places them on the counter. WILLIAM Just these, please. TOD That comes to £2. Shall I wrap them for you? Script #1 | Page 2 WILLIAM Bye. Thank you. No. TOD Bye. WILLIAM goes home and puts the porcelain cats on the table by his single bed. Every time he looks at them, he remembers his failure with TOD. A monument. After a month, he turns them to face the wall. After two months, he places them in the top drawer. They are not a set, and never will be. End Scene. Actor #1 | 5 More Minutes Mandy Actor #2 | Bambi Script #2 | Page 1 A Love Story. INT. MIRIAM’S ROOM. EVENING. Lights up. It’s the year 2050AD, and sex is contactless. MIRIAM is in bed. Enter JAKE – he sits in the bed beside MIRIAM. MIRIAM and JAKE beep once, each. Their transaction is complete. They smoke Vapes. MIRIAM wonders what JAKE tastes like. She imagines he tastes the way her avocado hand soap smells. JAKE thinks about the never changing weather. Exit JAKE. MIRIAM will write to JAKE in an open letter on her blog. JAKE won’t read it. Lights down. End scene. Actor #3 | Betty with the Bleeding Toes Actor #4 | String Jim Script #3 | Page 1 Somewhere Beyond the Sea. INT. WAITING ROOM. DAY. The waiting room is battleship grey. RECEPTIONIST sits at her white desk. She has an angry face. There are a few people in chairs around the waiting room, all aimlessly looking at their phones to minimise the chances of accidental interaction. On the wall there is a picture of a train made out of wooden bricks – teddy bears and dolls riding the train. They can’t be getting anywhere fast, but they seem fairly happy about it. There is another picture that shows a woodland type setting. Sun shining through trees. SFX: Local radio. JESSSICA walks through the waiting room. She holds her hands inside her sleeves. She is aware that people in the waiting room are looking at her. Aware of how she is walking. She feels like she has forgotten how to walk entirely. And drags her gangly body to the door. RECEPTIONIST You can’t use that door. It’s a fire door. JESSICA pushes on the door but it doesn’t open. JESSICA Bye, thank you. RECEPTIONIST You can’t use that door. It’s a fire door. JESSICA Is there a button? For the- RECEPTIONIST You can’t use that door. It’s a fire door. It’s a fire door. JESSICA Oh, sorry I didn’t hear you. Well I heard you, but it didn’t go in. RECEPTIONIST It’s a fire door. Script #3 | Page 2 JESSICA How do I get – RECEPTIONIST You have to go through the revolving door. That’s a fire door. JESSICA Thank you. RECEPTIONIST If you use the fire door, we have to reset the alarm. It’s really-really irritating. JESSICA Sorry, ok, thank you. JESSICA’s face goes red. She momentarily pictures herself as a dead body in a rowboat. The backstory to the fantasy is this: JESSICA somehow gets a boat from somewhere (it doesn’t matter). She rows the boat out into the sea. Takes a huge overdose of [some unspecified pills]. As the boat drifts into the water Jessica drifts into death – her last view, the blazing- white sun in a powder-blue sky. The smell of salt. Days later, the boat would wash up on the beach, her carcass still aboard. Skin blistered, sunburnt and red, and there would be rips in the skin from where the sea birds had pecked at her. Attending police officers say things like “Well, at least they didn’t peck out her eyes” and then, someone who knew her, probably her older brother, would say “Yes, thank goodness. She had such lovely eyes.” JESSICA gets off the bus home and eats a bowl of cereal. She spends the afternoon watching hidden camera shows. She has had a song stuck in her head for days now, but she can’t remember what it is. End scene. Actor #5 | Eric Gets the Bus to Emergencies Actor #6 | Layla “Look Into My” Buxton Script #4 | Page 1 Somewhere Beyond the Sea II: A Sequel. EXT: THE SEA. Day. JESSICA lays motionless in a boat in the middle of open water. Her skin is sunburnt and blistered. The sun beats down on JESSICA as if trying to evaporate her into the sky and the heavens. A seagull lands on the side of the boat and looks at her body with a tilted head, as the boat rocks some. The seagull cries/calls out. Hops down into the body of the boat to get a closer look. SEAGULL That receptionist is going to feel really bad about embarrassing this lady. Look what she’s done. I won’t eat her eyes though, out of respect. She obviously had such lovely eyes. As the seagull tears at JESSICA’s red skin, the SPIRIT OF JESSICA stands up out of her body.