City University of New York (CUNY) CUNY Academic Works All Dissertations, Theses, and Capstone Projects Dissertations, Theses, and Capstone Projects 6-2020 Truth Telling: Exploring Sexuality in Widowed and Single Older Black Women Margaret A. Salisu The Graduate Center, City University of New York How does access to this work benefit ou?y Let us know! More information about this work at: https://academicworks.cuny.edu/gc_etds/3854 Discover additional works at: https://academicworks.cuny.edu This work is made publicly available by the City University of New York (CUNY). Contact: [email protected] TRUTH TELLING: EXPLORING SEXUALITY IN WIDOWED AND SINGLE OLDER BLACK WOMEN by Margaret Abiodun Salisu A dissertation submitted to the Graduate Faculty in Social Welfare in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy, The City University of New York 2020 © 2020 MARGARET ABIODUN SALISU All Rights Reserved Truth Telling: Exploring Sexuality in Widowed and Single Older Black Women by Margaret Abiodun Salisu This manuscript has been read and accepted for the Graduate Faculty in Social Welfare in satisfaction of the dissertation requirement for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy. Date Vicki Lens Chair of Examining Committee Date Harriet Goodman Executive Officer Supervisory Committee: Vicki Lens, Ph.D. Nancy Giunta, Ph.D. Dagmar Herzog, Ph.D. THE CITY UNIVERSITY OF NEW YORK iii ABSTRACT Truth Telling: Exploring Sexuality in Widowed and Single Older Black Women Advisor: Professor Vicki Lens Interest in older adults’ sexuality is reflected in the significant growth of literature on sexuality and aging, especially in the last few decades, and in growing media interest in this topic. Clinicians, researchers, educators, journalists, policymakers, and other stakeholders continue to highlight the importance of sexuality and sexual health in the older population. However, available studies in this area pertain to older married people almost exclusively and the few available studies on widows focus exclusively on White women. To address this gap in knowledge, this study focused on older widowed and single Black women aged 65 to 75 years. Feminist theories guided my epistemological stance. Using a phenomenological approach to inquiry, I interviewed 14 Black women who self-identified as widowed, single, and older. Four major themes emerged in this study: Lonelier with age, moments of amazement, dating experiences, and I live in a paradox. Truth telling recorded the women’s experiences and their pursuit of social autonomy and sexual expression as older Black women. This study uncovered several significant insights on the meaning that older single and widowed women ascribe to their sexuality as well as the impact of socio-cultural factors on that understanding. This study reinforced the sexuality of older single and widowed Black women as a further dimension of intersectionality. The implications of practice and policy pertain to social workers and providers who must assess fundamental historical and contemporary issues that older single and widowed women face while considering the convergence of sexuality, gender, and race. iv ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I thank my heavenly father, the Almighty God for giving me the strength and the wisdom to start and to complete this journey. Heavenly father, your grace indeed, was enough for me. Thank you, Lord, for this daily encouragement: “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end”(Jeremiah 29:11). I would like to express my deep and sincere gratitude to my Chair, Vicki Lens for providing invaluable guidance throughout this research project. Your immense knowledge, thoroughness, sincerity, and motivation have deeply inspired me. Thank you, Chair, for challenging me to recognize my own biases, and for encouraging me to think like a “scholar”. I am also extending my heartfelt gratitude to the members of my dissertation committee, for their untiring support, uplifting encouragement, and insightful feedback. I want to thank my mother and my wonderful daughters, Gabrielle and Michelle, for their never-ending support and love. I could not have finished this project without your patience, support and prayers. I love you dearly. Sincere thanks to my friends and colleagues. I love you all. My special thanks go to all the women who participated in this study. You made this work a reality. Thank you for sharing your stories with me. Finally, I must acknowledge my father, who inspired me to pursue this dream. When I was 19 years old, he told me, “I know you’re going to get a Ph.D.” At that time, it was unimaginable; but now, it is a reality. Yes dad, even though death snatched you away from seeing this day, I want you to know, “You were right, I got it”. v TABLE OF CONTENTS ABSTRACT iv ACKNOWLEDGEMENT v LIST OF TABLE x CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION 1 Problem Formulation and Statement of Research 1 Sexuality of Widowed and Single Older Black Women 3 Statement of Research 5 Research Questions 6 CHAPTER 11: A REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE 7 Ageism and Sexuality in Later Life 7 The Medicalization of Sexuality in Later Life 8 An Explanation of Sexuality in its Socio-Cultural Context 9 Studies on the Sexuality of Older Adults 11 Studies on the Sexuality of Older Widows 13 Theoretical Framework 18 The Social Construction Theory 18 Feminist Theories 21 The Black Feminist Theory 23 The Age Relations Theory 25 Summary 27 vi CHAPTER 111: METHODOLOGY 28 Methodology 28 Phenomenology 28 Sampling Plan 30 Recruitment 31 Sample Size 32 Data Collection 32 Procedure 32 Interview Guide 34 Data Analysis 35 Trustworthiness and Credibility 36 Participants Demographics 37 Participants Demographic Summary 39 Positionality 41 Summary 41 CHAPTER IV: LONELIER WITH AGE 43 Truth Telling: Loneliness 43 Looking Beyond Family for Support and Intimacy 46 Valuing Independence Despite Widowhood/Singlehood 49 Summary 54 CHAPTER V: MOMENTS OF AMAZEMENT 56 Navigating Sexuality in Old age: Moments of Amazement 57 Coping with Sexual Urges and Moments of Temptation 59 vii Bringing Back Memories 61 Being Sexual 64 Summary 66 CHAPTER V1: DATING EXPERIENCES 68 Relationship Seeking 68 Age of Potential Dates 71 Materialism 74 The Unavailability of Black men 77 Family Approval 79 Summary 83 CHAPTER V11: I LIVE IN A PARADOX 85 Family Safety 86 Friends and Family 90 Self -Image 93 Re-Engagement in Sexual Activity 95 Older Men and Sex 99 Consulting Doctors About Sex 99 Summary 102 CHAPTER V111 103 Discussion 103 Lonelier with Age 103 viii Moments of Amazement 106 Dating Experiences 109 I Live in a Paradox 112 Conclusion 114 Limitations 122 Implications 124 Implications for Social Work Practice 124 Implications for Policy 125 Recommendations 129 Social Work Studies 129 Social Work Research 130 Final Thoughts 131 APPENDICES 132 BIBLIOGRAPHY 137 ix LIST OF TABLES The Demographics of the Participants 39 x CHAPTER I: PROBLEM FORMULATION AND STATEMENT OF RESEARCH Sexuality is an essential part of the human experience, and the expression of sexuality is a human need and right, regardless of an individual’s age, gender, ethnicity, religion, ability, or sexual orientation (Bouman & Kleinplatz, 2015). Studies show that sexual activity is associated with successful aging, life satisfaction, and greater purpose in life (Prairie et al, 2011: Woloski- Wruble et al., 2010). Sexual activity also has been demonstrated to reduce the mental health problems associated with aging (Burgess, 2004; Edwards & Booth, 1994), promotes better cognitive functioning (Wright et al., 2017), and enhance self-identification as a human being (Muzacz & Akinsulure-Smith, 2013). According to the current understanding of sexuality and aging, it is assumed that many people are sexually active in their later years (Kazer, 2013; Lindau, et al., 2007 ), and many people in their 80s and 90s still consider sexual expressions and feelings to be a vital part of the human experience (DeLamater, 2012; Langer, 2009; Watters & Boyd, 2009). Uninterrupted engagement in sexual activities well into old age supports the assertion that the desire to express one’s sexuality does not decrease with age (Rowntree, 2014). In fact, sexual desire has been equated to a strong motivational force, like hunger or thirst (DeLamater & Sill, 2005). Interest in the sexuality of older adults is reflected in the significant growth of literature on sexuality and aging, especially in the last few decades, and in growing interest in this topic in the media. Clinicians, researchers, educators, journalists, policymakers, and other stakeholders continue to highlight the importance of sexuality and sexual health in older populations (Syme & Cohn, 2016). However, the few available studies in this area pertain to older married people almost exclusively (Flynn et al., 2016; Syme & Cohn, 2016), thus marginalizing research on the sexuality of older widowed and single persons. This represents a vital gap in research 1 knowledge, given the growing number of people who experience widowhood in later years. People are living longer. Thus, an aging demography will remain sexually active well beyond the age of 85 years (Ortman et al., 2014). Nevertheless, older adults experience the loss of their partners as they age (Radosh & Simkin, 2016). For instance, in 2015, nearly half (46%) of the U.S. population aged 65 years and older was widowed, and this number is expected to increase significantly (Federal Interagency Forum on Aging-Related Statistics, 2016). The few available studies on widows have focused exclusively on White women. The current study focused on older widowed and single black women aged 65 to 75 years. Although it holds true across all races that older men and women face ageism (Butler, 1969), emerging scholars have noted that factors such as healthcare disparities, poverty levels, social/recreational activities, partner availability, prejudices, discrimination, and stress significantly affect older Black persons differently than they do White populations (Barnes et al., 2010).