Can They Change?

See Pages 3, 4, 5 $1.00 WWW.5TJT.COM ,una ,arp <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">VOL. 10 NO. 15 22 TEVES 5770 </li><li style="flex:1">JANUARY 8, 2010 </li></ul><ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">FROM THE EDITOR’S DESK </li><li style="flex:1">INSIDE </li></ul>POWER TO THE PEOPLE B Y L A R R Y G O R D O N Faux Frumkeit Stacey Solomon 22 SECURITY THREAT What Does Jimmy Want? Hannah Reich Berman 29 “When it comes to airline security,” says Yehuda Dafna, “America is backwards.” Dafna, a resident of Woodsburgh and a member of several Five Towns shuls, is the president and founder of ISS Action, Inc., and speaks from two decades of extensive experience with airline security. the world. Defining Death Down Our talk with Yehuda Dafna Rabbi Avi Shafran 30 31 about security at airports and on airlines was of course precipitat- ed by the events of December 25, when a lone terrorist, pur- portedly a functionary of Al Qaeda, attempted to set off explosive materials on an airlin- er approaching Detroit’s interna- tional airport. The terrorist passed through screeners at airports in both Nigeria and MindBiz Esther Mann, LMSW Yitzhak Ahronovitch, a’h Rabbi Yair Hoffman 75 The ISS offices are located at JFK Airport, and the company employs more than 150 people and provides security consult- ants to scores of airlines around Howard Kopel, the first Orthodox Jew elected to the Nassau County Legislature since its inception in 1996, being sworn in on Monday at the Cradle of Aviation Museum by U.S. Congressman Peter King as Mr. Kopel began his term as a member of the new Republican majority. See Page 61 Continued on Page 15 HEARD IN THE BAGEL STORE Letters to the Editor Shidduchim: Not So Fast Dear Editor, with length of courtship, logic would have us insist that a couple really get to know each other well before committing. We can all cite examples from the secu- lar world where couples live together, marry, then divorce. Yes, getting to know someone very well does not preclude divorce. But logically, if a couple who know each other well for a long time can end up divorcing, does it mean that we should throw caution to the wind and Where The Time Goes Welcome to the shidduch scene. (“Matchmaker, Match- maker,” Heard in the Bagel Store, January 1). I hope your son finds his bashert quickly. And, on the subject of speed, I’d like to discuss your notion that “the entire courtship itself usually takes about three to four weeks.” The obvious response is, have you heard about the high rate of divorce in frum circles? While there has been no study correlat- ing this increased divorce rate Bat Mitzvah of Ayala Schwartz. See Page 72 B Y L A R R Y G O R D O N I know this to be true because that’s the way it was in 1970, 1980, and 1990. And, of course, as Y2K approached, who would have thought we would ever get used to the idea of a new millennium on top of the adjustment required in dealing with a new decade? I was just a boy not so long ago, and then this Waterford crystal ball dropped in Times Square the other night and it was 2010. It’s always mildly challeng- ing to adjust to the change in the number assigned to identifying the year. However, if I write enough checks over the next week or two I will rapidly grow accustomed to the new decade. When the decade changes it provides an additional jolt to <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">Continued on Page 6 </li><li style="flex:1">Continued on Page 12 </li></ul>MBD Music Therapy IAF Targets Terror SKA Gift of Shabbos. CAN THEY CHANGE? See Page 57 Tunnels B Y S A M U E L S O K O L ISRAEL CORRESPONDENT A Different View On The Recent YU Debate B Y D R . N O R M A N G O L D W A S S E R In a joint operation with the GSS (Shabak) last Friday night, the Israeli Air Force successfully targeted two terror tunnels lead- ing from the northern and southern Gaza Strip towards Israel The tunnels originated While reading the various accounts and debates over the recent Yeshiva University panel about those of a definitively non-Torah orientation, I realized Mordechai Ben David (center) and members of the Mikimi Cheer-up Squad paid an unexpected visit to the Woodmere Rehabilitation and Health Care Center and lifted the spirits of the residents with their lively singing and dancing. See Page 59 Giving life and hope: recipient meets donor. See Page 48 <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">Continued on Page 5 </li><li style="flex:1">Continued on Page 13 </li></ul>CANDLE LIGHTING Jan. 8 – 4:27 PM Jan. 15 – 4:34 PM 2<ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li></ul>3FEATURES Around The Five Towns Classified Ads 44 68 P.O. BOX 690 LAWRENCE, NY 11559 516-984-0079 <a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank">[email protected] </a><a href="mailto:[email protected]" target="_blank">[email protected] </a>The Dish LARRY GORDON Publisher/Editor ESTA J. GORDON Managing Editor Elke Probkevitz 32 YOSSI GORDON, YOCHANAN GORDON Sales Managers Five Towns Simcha Naomi Cohen/Glamorous Pics 70 CHANA ROCHEL ROSS Editorial Assistant SIDI BARON YAKOV SERLE Health Section 46-48 Sales Representatives Insights On The Torah R’ Yanki Tauber R’ Ben Tzion Shafier R’ Mordechai Kamenetzky SHMUEL GERBER Chief Copy Editor MICHELE JUSTIC Copy Editor 24 35 41 CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Hannah Reich Berman, Anessa V. Cohen, Rabbi Aryeh Z. Ginzberg, Toby Klein Greenwald, Rabbi Yair Hoffman, Miriam Horowitz, Rabbi Mordechai Kamenetzky, Shmuel Katz, Phyllis J. Lubin, Esther Mann, Rochelle Miller, Martin Mushell, Elke Probkevitz, Naomi Ross, Rachael Schindler, Rabbi Avrohom Sebrow, Rabbi Avi Shafran, Eli Shapiro, Ari Sher, Samuel Sokol Luach 8MindBiz Esther Mann, LMSW 31 Mother’s Musings Phyllis J. Lubin DOV GORDON, ELISHEVA ELEFANT Staff Graphic Artists 19 IVAN NORMAN, IRA THOMAS Staff Photographers Puzzle Yoni Glatt 74 40 29 FRANKEL & CO. Design & Production Real Estate Anessa V. Cohen TALIYE CORLEY Art Director SARAH GREENBAUM Assistant Art Director That’s The Way It Is! Hannah Reich Berman The Five Towns Jewish Times is an independent weekly newspaper. Opinions expressed by writers and columnists are not necessarily those of the editor or publisher. We are not responsible for the kashrus or hashgachah of any product or Travel Section 36-44, 49-51 establishment advertised in the Five Towns Jewish Times .4<ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li></ul>ridor between the Sinai Peninsula and Gaza. Despite numerous sorties flown by the IAF against the tunnel system, many Israelis consider it impossible to halt the use of the tunnels without a boots-on- the-ground operation. During Cast Lead, the upper echelons of the defense establishment decided against a move on the Egyptian-Gaza border. Terror Tunnels Continued from Front Cover from a distance of approximately one kilometer from the Gaza security fence and were intended for infiltrating into Israel and executing a terror attack against Israeli civilians and IDF soldiers. According to the Israeli military, the attacks were in response to the firing of a rocket at the city of Netivot last Thursday evening. According to a report in Al-Ahram, the official Egyptian state newspaper, there are currently around 1,200 such tunnels. Also, in a joint IDF-GSS operation this Tuesday, the IAF attacked a group of terror operatives planning to fire rockets from the southern Gaza strip into Israel. Accurate hits were identified. The IDF statement did not explain why the attack on the tunnel was undertaken only in response to a Since the end of Operation Cast Lead— an IDF incursion into the Hamas-ruled Gaza Strip in January of last year in retalia- tion for several years of rocket attacks on Israeli civilians in the Negev Desert—more than 280 rockets and mortars have been fired at Israel. Throughout 2008, prior to Cast Lead, over 3,300 rockets and mortars were fired at Israel from the Gaza Strip. In a statement released to the foreign press, the IDF declared that Israel’s defense establishment “will not tolerate the firing of rockets by terrorist organizations at Israel and will continue to respond against any attempt to disrupt the calm in Israel’s southern communities.” rocket attack. Some 70,000 residents of Gaza are report- ed to be involved in digging the tunnels, which can cost up to $50,000 to excavate, but which can bring in profits of up to $184,000 in goods on a daily basis. Hamas is an offshoot of the Muslim Brotherhood, a radical Islamist organiza- tion active in Egypt. Hamas operatives involved in tunneling operations have opened fire on Egyptian soldiers, and The IDF statement did not explain why the attack on the tunnel was undertaken only in response to a rocket attack, if the intended purpose of the under- ground passage was to facilitate terrorist activity against Israeli civilians. There are several hundred smuggling tunnels running under the Philadelpi cor- Continued on Page 18 <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li></ul>5LETTERS TO THE EDITOR Continued from Front Cover say conversely that a short courtship will end up in a happy marriage? I think not! There are many problems that have arisen in the last decade or two regarding shidduchim. Some we can control, some we have to wait for the rabbanim to address. But there are some things that we as parents can insist on. One is the duration of dating. Why is it that most singles spend less time getting to know each other than they do buying a new house? The fact is that singles today are expected to commit at a blink of an eye, regardless whether they are 20 or 35. If the parents hear that a couple has been dating for two weeks, they book wedding halls! I wonder if we would be that cava- lier with purchasing stocks or other investments. These unwritten rules must change lest we have even more divorces. On another note, as a member of several shidduch networks, I have been fortu- nate to meet countless singles of various ages and hashkafos. I would like to address the common concern that is being voiced in every shidduch group and at every Shabbos table among those that have children “in the parashah.” That is, the caliber of the girls and women of today is far superior to that of their male counterparts. The women are goal-orient- ed, focused, put-together, articulate, and polished—while their male counterparts are lost souls. Many have no direction. Many have no drive. They are sitting and learning in beis midrash, biding their time. They are waiting for a good shidduch—that is, a woman who will work and be willing and able to support their hasmadah. These women will work full- time, raise children, shop, cook, and clean, while their spouses warm the seats of their kollel. Even in circles where boys do not intend to learn full-time forever, if at all, our boys are not as polished, moti- vated, and capable as their female counterparts. In Sefer Bereishis, we are told that Adam and Chava will be punished for their sin: Chava will bear children with suffering and Adam will eat bread by the sweat of his brow. Who changed that along the way and cursed Chava with both punishments? It used to be that the superstars of a shiur would go for semi- chah and they would continue learning. Now, every Chaim, Yankel, and Shloime are superstars and learn indefinitely, with no parnasah concerns at all. This is another situation that is in our hands that can change. We as a community must do some introspection and see if this is how a couple should be living today. Is this what the Bais Yaakov/Sarah Schenirer movement had in mind when they wanted to educate the girls for the future? Was this the intention of teach- ing text instead of Tzena U’rena? The current solution that is being offered by the learners is that they will work when the need arises. But what will they do then? And how much can they earn? Anyone hear of the tuition crisis? It’s unrealistic for us to keep silent any longer. This lack of self-drive starts in the school system, where the girls are expected to do the work while the boys are not expected to perform. Why? Because boys will be boys and they need to play ball Continued on Page 8 6<ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li></ul>7LETTERS TO THE EDITOR Continued from Page 6 and have downtime? We have such low expectations of our sons that when they reach the shidduch scene, their female counterparts are disappointed in the choices. This part of the shidduch crisis is only now being brought to the forefront. We were afraid to say anything and to state the obvious, but let’s not sweep it under the rug any more. Let’s discuss this as a community and see if we can slow our singles down and insist they date longer than three or four weeks. And let’s make sure that our fabulous girls really do get their fair share: fabulous boys. Name Withheld Keeping It Real Dear Editor, I just want to say, having read your article on shidduchim, that I have never read such an amazing, incredible article before. And believe me, I have read many, CALENDAR LUACH Jan. 8 – Jan. 16 ZIP Code: 11516 22 Teves Friday, January 8 Daf yomi: Bava Basra 140 Z’manim*: Earliest tallis/teﬁllin: Sunrise: 6:20 am 7:19 am Latest Shema: <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">M. Av. </li><li style="flex:1">9:04 am </li></ul><ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">9:40 am </li><li style="flex:1">Gr’a </li></ul>P’lag ha’minchah: Candle Lighting: 3:46 pm 4:27 pm 23 Teves – Shabbos Saturday, January 9 Shabbos Parashas Sh’mos Blessing of Chodesh Shevat Shabbos ends**: 5:31 pm <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">72 min. </li><li style="flex:1">5:59 pm </li></ul>29 Teves Friday, January 15 Daf yomi: Bava Basra 147 <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">Earliest tallis/teﬁllin: </li><li style="flex:1">6:19 am </li></ul><ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">7:17 am </li><li style="flex:1">Sunrise: </li></ul>Latest Shema: <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">M. Av. </li><li style="flex:1">9:04 am </li></ul><ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">9:40 am </li><li style="flex:1">Gr’a </li></ul>P’lag ha’minchah: Candle Lighting: 3:52 pm 4:34 pm 1 Shevat – Shabbos Saturday, January 16 Shabbos Parashas Va’eira Rosh Chodesh Shevat Shabbos ends**: 5:38 pm <ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">72 min. </li><li style="flex:1">6:06 pm </li></ul>*All times from MyZmanim.com ** add a few minutes for tosefos Shabbos according to your minhag Deadline for Advertising in the Next Issue is Tuesday, January 11 at 5:00 P.M. Call 516-984-0079 8<ul style="display: flex;"><li style="flex:1">January 8, 2010 </li><li style="flex:1">5 TOWNS JEWISH TIMES </li></ul>many articles on this sad, ongoing, never- ending topic. For the first time ever, an author is so open, so truthful, so honest and real about the current situation that I found my eyes tearing as I read the words used, describing exactly, almost word for word, what we as a family and I as a mother of a 27-year-old “older single girl” go through every moment of my life, every breathing second of every day. And believe me, sometimes it even hurts to do just that— i.e., breathe. It was so refreshing to see that there is someone out there who compre- hends and grasps the reality of our situation for what it is: an absolute tragedy. And I know I speak for many others who are in the same boat as we are; there aren’t even any tears left to shed. Like you so wisely write, even the seem- ingly small matter of a bachur just try- ing once (obviously, if the rest of the cri- teria are met) to meet a girl who may be a year or two older than himself would make such a difference in the lives of so many girls (and boys). I have no answers. Like everyone else, we just talk and talk about it, and that’s all we ever have on our minds. But if more people saw things the way you do, I just know it would have such a major impact on the “shidduch crisis.” And if more people would sit up and realize how logical your words are, things could be so different . . . but what’s the point of dreaming or hoping? I know from experience that nothing will ever change, so all I can say at this point is, thank you for your words. They warmed my heart, if nothing else; and if even one other person changes his or her outlook as a result, and if even one shidduch is made as a result, it will have been worth it.

Can They Change?

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