CONTENTS ISSUE 240: A GM’S WRATH REGULAR COLUMNS DEPARTMENTS 57 Web Scryer by Ken Newquist Minions! Henchmen! Lackeys! 4 Cries from the Attic Editorial of a madman GAMEMASTER’S WORKSHOP 45 Tales from the Table 5 Table Talk: Letters Page Actual stories from the gaming table Our readers talk back 47 All Things Magic Rope of Holding by Barb Blackburn 60 Back Room at the Games Pit 48 Deadly Trappings An opinion arena where Pin Ball Wizard Room by Barb Blackburn readers can sound off 49 Bait And Tackle 62 Weird Pete’s Bulletin Board Adventure hooks on the fly Classified ads, personals and other strangeness SPECIAL FEATURES REVIEWS 51 Lost Game Safari 35 by Alan Hume Caesar’s Legions Kobolds are 55 Indy Game Scene Dangerous Vermin Sample file A Solo Dice Game by J.L. Duncan by Mark Dowson OneDice World War One 58 Off the Shelf by Noah Chinn 42 Red Dwarf: Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers Happy Holidays 59 Brian’s Picks Bringing special celebrations into Atomic Robo Majestic 12, your campaign Cthulhu Britannica London, Fantasy Friends by Jim Davenport © Copyright 2017, Kenzer and Company, All Rights Reserved. Knights of the Dinner Table® magazine (ISSN 1526-307X) is published monthly by Kenzer and Company, 1659 N Claremont Ave, Chicago, IL 60647. LEGAL NOTICE: Knights of the Dinner Table, HackMaster and Kingdoms of Kalamar are registered trademarks of Kenzer and Company. A GM’s Wrath™, All Things Magic, Back Room at the Games Pit, Bait and Tackle, Board Squawk, Brian’s Small Press Picks, Celebrity Hack, Cries from the Attic, Deadly Trappings, Disks of Wondrous Power, GameMasters’ Workshop, Game Mechanic, Gamer Pulpit, GameVine, Gaming the Movies, Gary Jackson Files, Hacklopedia of Beasts, Hard Eight Enterprises, kenzerco.com, KODT, Lookin’ at Comics, Off the Shelf, One-Two Punches, Parting Shots, Players’ Advantage, Radio Free KODT, Retro-KODT, RFKODT, Rustlers of the Night, SpellJacked, Summon Web Scryer, Table Talk, Tales from the Table, The Gamer’s Rant on the Movies/TV. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, The “Indy” Game Scene, the Kenzer and Company Logo, The Quotable Gamer, Weird Pete’s Bulletin Board, W.W.A.G.D. and all prominent characters and likenesses thereof are trademarks of Kenzer and Company. 2 Knights of the Dinner Table® #240 COMIC STRIPS ® KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE PUBLISHER Kenzer and Company 9 A Stand Up Guy EDITOR-IN-CHIEF 11 Rue the Day Jolly R. Blackburn • [email protected] ASSISTANT EDITOR 15 The Maddening Barbara Blackburn • [email protected] Halls KODT DEVELOPMENT TEAM 20 Leaving a Mark Jolly R. Blackburn • Steve Johansson David S. Kenzer • Brian Jelke • Barbara Blackburn (+1) 23 Boom Goes the Hammer HACKMASTER EDITOR Steve Johansson • [email protected] 25 Wrecking Ball of the Gawds KODT STRIP ART Jolly R. Blackburn COVER ART Jim Wampler 30 A Bit of Advice CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS 34 The Pay Out Brendon Fraim • Brian Fraim Larry Elmore • Carolyn Stogdill 63 One-Two Punches Bill “Indy” Cavalier • Ken Harrison • Jolly Blackburn CONTRIBUTING WRITERS OTHER TOONS Kenneth Newquist • Mark Dowson Noah Chinn • Barbara Blackburn • Jim Davenport 61 SnarfQuest™ Jolly R. Blackburn • Larry Elmore • Larry Elmore J.L. Duncan • Alan Hume • Andy Miller SALES/MARKETING/ADVERTISING 64 Additional Cartoons Steve Johansson • [email protected] • 847-858-6847 SUBSCRIPTION SERVICES [email protected] CHARMED PERSONS Bill “Indy” Cavalier, Carolyn Stogdill, Jolly Blackburn, KenSample Harrison file Kevin Vance • Jack Grayson • Craig Zipse PRINTED IN U.S.A. Postmaster: Send address changes to: ABOUT Knights of the Dinner Table THE COVER 1659 N CLAREMONT AVE, CHICAGO, IL 60647 E-Mail: [email protected] • Phone: 847.662.6600 This month’s cover by World Wide Web: www.kenzerco.com Jim Wampler is Submissions: We accept submissions for strip ideas, jokes, cartoons, another tribute to a etc. We are interested in running anything that other gamers and fans would enjoy. Check out our website for writer’s guidelines. classic Jack Kirby comic book cover by Marvel Subscriptions: A standard 12-issue monthly subscription is only $77.99 (or $65.99 for slower bulk mail shipping). [US $92.99 for (Fantastic Four #48). Canada or US $117.99 for other foreign locations.] 6- and 24-issue subscriptions are also available. To subscribe, order by credit card at our online store at HTTP://WWW.KENZERCO.COM or send a check or money order (made payable to Kenzer and Company) to: NIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE™ was accidentally created by Jolly R. Blackburn Kway back in 1990 as ‘filler’ for his small press magazine, Shadis. It was Kenzer & Company KODT Subscriptions, something of a ‘creative burp’ and Jolly really didn’t give it much thought. 1659 N Claremont Ave, Chicago, IL 60647 Perhaps that’s why he was just as surprised as anyone that soon KODT was overshadowing everything else he’d ever done and that the created was now Back Issues: Older issues and other KODT merchandise are avail- able for direct purchase on our website at HTTP://WWW.KENZERCO.COM controlling the creator. The Knights have gone far beyond anything Jolly or the D-Team (David Kenzer, Brian Jelke, Steve Johansson and Barbara Blackburn) ever imagined. In 2006, Jolly was ATTENTION RETAILERS: If you are having difficulty getting our inducted into the Hall of Fame. Now, with over 240 issues and over 71 trade paper backs under product (including back issues and RPGs) please call or e-mail us. their belts, it’s been a wild ride and we look forward to seeing where the Knights take us next. Knights of the Dinner Table® #240 3 LOOKIN’ BACK WITH RESPECT obody could fail to notice what a tough year 2016 turned She was also in other films and she was an accomplished, out to be in regards to losing legendary entertainers. We all talented writer. She wrote many books and was a script doctor, Nwere stunned by the losses — David Bowie, Prince, George making improvements on movies like Hook and The Wedding Michael, Debbie Reynolds, and her daughter, Carrie Fisher and Singer. Her book credits include Postcards from the Edge which was many more. made in to a major motion picture, which she, herself, adapted for I can’t do justice to any of these people here, not truly. But, I the screen. That film was nominated for two Academy Awards and want to try at least -- at least for our beloved Princess Leia, Carrie three Golden Globes. Fisher. For those of us in the geek community, this one hit us Fisher was also an advocate for those struggling with mental where it hurts. illness because of how candid she was about her own struggles with being bipolar. This helped break the stigma for many people I never will forget the first time I saw Star Wars (as it is now called who also suffered and realized they were not alone. That is some A New Hope). It was at the drive-in with my boyfriend (who is now real heroic stuff. my husband). What a perfect way to see Star Wars for the first time -- under the stars in a Mustang convertible. Other movie and television roles included the epic Mystery Woman in The Blues Brothers, Lorna in Shampoo and guest When Darth Vader first strode into cinematic history, what a appearances on Frasier, Sex and the City, Smallville, The Big Bang thrill it was. And, there, imprisoned by this black-robed villain, was Theory & 30 Rock. the pure and beautiful Princess Leia Organa. Here she was, not much older than I was at the time, a young girl on screen - and she So, as we look ahead to the upcoming year of 2017, and pray it was a HERO. She wasn’t just ANY hero, she was the LEADER of the will treat us well, we cannot help but look back a bit, at those we Rebel Alliance. What a welcome character to see on screen for a have lost, those who have enriched our lives, our music and movie young girl like me, who had always dreamed of being a hero one collections and those who have inspired us to be heroes of our day. own. After all, that’s a bit of what role-playing is all about, being heroic. I loved them all, but, to me, Princess Leia will always be the I am not alone in feeling as if this wonderful Princess shone like epitome of heroism for all of us, but especially for the women and a beacon. To so many girls growing up with her as their role girls who really longed to see someone they could also aspire to model, she embodied a New Hope in them -- a hope that showed be -- a hero who could stand toe to toe with evil, facing execution, them you don’t have to be male to do something important in the and not back down, who remains loyal and devoted to her cause world. You too can stand up against injustice. You too matter. and friends, and who thinks more of others than she does of her- And, that is the never-to-be-forgotten impact of this young self, even laying aside her status as royalty to get into the trenches actresses impact on pop culture and society that will be most with the rest of her troops. I can only aspire to be such a person, in enduring. When Carrie Fisher died, it was as if Vader andSample his min- real life,file and at the gaming table. May we all carry on in such a way ions had won. that Leia would be proud to call us friends.