View metadata, citation and similar papers at core.ac.uk brought to you by CORE provided by University of Waterloo's Institutional Repository This Peregrina's Autoethnographic Account of Walking the Camino Via de la Plata: A Feminist Spiritual Inquiry into Human Transformation by Kimberly Lyons A thesis presented to the University of Waterloo in fulfillment of the thesis requirement for the degree of Master of Arts in Recreation and Leisure Studies Waterloo, Ontario, Canada 2013 © Kimberly Lyons 2013 Author’s Declaration I hereby declare that I am the sole author of this thesis. This is a true copy of the thesis, including any required final revisions, as accepted by my examiners. I understand that my thesis may be made electronically available to the public. ii Abstract This is an autoethnographic account of my 1000km journey across The Camino Via de la Plata, framed within transpersonal theory. From my personal account of a peak experience on The Way, this spiritual inquiry attempts to connect myself and the reader to insights into transformation and living through embodied writing while contributing to the exploration of personal flourishing and growth in leisure studies. This process involved moving into and through Romanyshyn’s (2007) six orphic moments found in re-search processes with soul in mind. I then unfold my journey along the Camino and deepen this inquiry by engaging literature that help to explore spiritual aspects of my journey on the Camino. Leisure inquiry frames this transpersonal peak experience in a number of ways: it is an act of empowerment (Arai, 1997), focal practice (Arai & Pedlar, 2000), resistance (Shaw, 2001, 2007), and an experience of liminality (Cody, 2012) with transformation occurring at the flux of it all. iii Acknowledgments It is with deep gratitude that I acknowledge the assistance and excellent navigational skills of my advisor, Dr. Susan M. Arai. Sue is quietly fierce and ferociously dedicated to service. Her presence, patience, gentle humour and ability to accept others for who they are where they are at is greatly comforting and she is extraordinarily easy to be around. She has been an compassionate, kind, and supportive witness for me, not only my academic journey, but on my healing journey as well, as the two are so intimately connected. This is not a journey that I would have just anyone witness at such a microscopic level. When talking with Sue I always gain further insight into my experience as she listens at a level that is inspiring. Sue is able to synthesize my experiences and reiterate back to me all I have said, assisting me in deepening personal awareness. Sue kindly commands excellence and is exceptional at laying out a conceptual map of where I am and where I need to go to truly capture and convey my thoughts in an excellent way. She is an artist when it comes to linking ideas and reconstructing the written word for flow and fluidity. It is no coincidence that Sue is my advisor. Spirit is fully behind this composition and I have no doubt that Sue and I were meant to work together. I give thanks for this special demonstration of magical synchronicity in the universe's mysterious choreography of the big plan. I also want to give my heartfelt thanks for that liminal space that is the Camino and the guidance of Spirit on my journey for the gift of recognizing the Sacredness of everyday, of every moment. Lastly, gratitude to the Ancestors, the ones who have gone before us and dreamed the dream of empowered women who work within the liminal realm and honour the guidance and wisdom of their bodies, hearts, souls, dreams and intuition for the greater good of the collective. Know this is the dream they dreamed for themselves and for future generations, for us. I so honour their journeys and dedicate myself to their vision for the collective by walking with courage and vulnerability into that dream. With Love. Kim. iv Table of Contents Author’s Declaration .......................................................................................................................... ii Abstract .............................................................................................................................................. iii Acknowledgments ............................................................................................................................. iv List of Figures ................................................................................................................................... vii Chapter One ........................................................................................................................................ 1 Opening Prayer ............................................................................................................................... 1 The Process of Inquiry: Transpersonal Autoethnography Guided by Organic Inquiry .................. 3 Positioning the Study .................................................................................................................... 19 Furthering Leisure Inquiry into Spirituality and Human Transformation .................................... 21 An invitation to the Reader ........................................................................................................... 22 Chapter Two: My Journey as it Unfolded in Chronological Timeline ............................................. 25 My Journey Unfolds ..................................................................................................................... 25 Setting Intention for My Journey .................................................................................................. 32 The sweat lodge: An embodied interpretation. ......................................................................... 32 Packing for the Way. ................................................................................................................ 35 Pre-flight cosmic jok.e .............................................................................................................. 39 And then some last minute packing. ......................................................................................... 41 On My Way ................................................................................................................................... 42 On The Way .................................................................................................................................. 44 My embodied experience of releasing sadness. ........................................................................ 47 Getting lost. .............................................................................................................................. 61 Getting lost. again: The final stretch to Santiago de Compostela. ........................................ 81 Heading Home .............................................................................................................................. 95 Unpacking inventory. ............................................................................................................... 96 The separation ceremony. ....................................................................................................... 103 The End. Or. ....................................................................................................................... 105 Chapter Three: A Transpersonal Re-Thinking of Empowerment and Liminality in the Journey of Transformation .......................................................................................................................................... 107 My Journey as an Act of Mobilizing: Participatory Knowing .................................................... 111 Reflections on Awareness ........................................................................................................... 112 Awareness of intention. .......................................................................................................... 114 Awareness of body and rhythms. ............................................................................................ 123 Reflections on Connecting and Disconnecting in a Process of Knowing ................................... 131 Letting go of possessions. ....................................................................................................... 136 v Letting go of World Weary Woman. ...................................................................................... 137 Letting go of Mother. .............................................................................................................. 140 Letting go of Shadow Lover. .................................................................................................. 144 Negotiating emotion of endings and opening to mystery and magic. ..................................... 148 Reflections on Contribution to Being ......................................................................................... 151 Understanding death and rebirth in transformation. ............................................................... 152 Embracing risk and vulnerability in transformation. .............................................................. 154 Discerning illusion and authenticity in transformation. .......................................................... 158 Discerning illusion and dreamtime in transformation. ........................................................... 159 Conclusions ...............................................................................................................................