DANGER SIGNS Types of abuse Jealousy and isolation is when someone cuts you off from your friends or gets angry when Emotional abuse includes: Is this Love? you talk to other people Name calling threats, humiliation, blame, insults, put downs, isolation from friends/family, ridicule, Aggression is when someone yells and shouts intimidation, being ignored, control, pressure and at you, uses physical violence, gets in to fights extreme jealousy Healthy relationships with other people and uses violence to solve problems Sexual abuse includes: Put downs are when someone makes you feel Pressuring someone in to having sex (this could stupid, calls you names, makes nasty include touching, kissing, fondling, oral sex or comments or generally puts you down penetration), taking photos of someone in a sexual situation when they don’t want to be photographed or are not aware of it (including on a Control is when someone checks on you all the mobile phone), sending those photos to other time – where you are, where you have been people or posting them on websites, forcing and who you are with; threatens or forces you someone to look at pornography, offering someone to do things you don’t want them to do; or to another person for sex doesn’t let you make your own decisions Physical abuse includes: Sexual abuse is when someone does sexual things to that you don’t agree to Putting a person in danger, pushing, slapping, hitting, punching, kicking, hair pulling, choking, burning or using a weapon or other object to harm If any of these things are happening to you, you may be in an abusive relationship It’s not your fault. Relationship abuse is not a one-off event. It’s a cycle and it usually gets worse if nothing is done to stop it. This is a caring relationship This is NOT a caring relationship Where to go for help... Two people feel good about themselves and One persons dominates and controls the other Always call 999 if you are in immediate danger each other. Good relationships include things like: Your boyfriend/girlfriend gets angry when National Domestic Violence Helpline you talk to someone else Tel.: 0808 2000 247 Being good friends Free and confidential 24hr helpline run by Women's Your boyfriend/girlfriend is verbally Freedom to do your own thing Aid and Refuge. This helpline will take calls from aggressive or physically threatening children & young people Time and space to see your friends Your boyfriend/girlfriend calls you names, Having your own interests puts you down, makes you feel bad The Hideout Website: www.thehideout.org.uk Knowing your opinions are respected Your boyfriend/girlfriend uses force, threats, Tel: 0800 1111 24hr freephone (ChildLine) Listening to each other emotional blackmail or bargains to make you do things you don’t want to do ChildLine Having fun together Website: www.childline.org.uk Your boyfriend/girlfriend threatens to harm Trusting each other Tel: 0800 1111 any of your friends, family, pets or property Free and confidential 24hr helpline for children and Being able to disagree with each other young people anywhere in the UK Your boyfriend/girlfriend posts unpleasant Being able to go at your own pace or intimately revealing things about you on - including sexually the internet NSPCC Website: www.nspcc.org.uk Making decisions together Tel: 0808 800 5000 This is control Being able to talk about it when you have an Free and confidential 24hr helpline This is abuse argument Does this sound familiar? Wiltshire Police Feeling safe Website: www.wiltshire.police.uk Respecting the decision if either of you want Tel: 101 Abusers are responsible for their behaviour. If to end the relationship you are in an abusive relationship, the best If you are abusing someone you need help. thing for you to do is END IT. This may be If you want to change your behaviour, you can – Everyone deserves respect tough and you may need help. with help. To talk to someone who can help, There are no excuses for abuse phone: Find support from people who care about you Respect on 0808 802 4040 (www.respect.uk.net) Physical assault is a crime Contact one of the support organisations listed Be true to yourself Carry a mobile phone or phone card and phone Respect offers information and advice to people Someone who loves you cares numbers of people or organisations who can who behave in abusive ways, as well as those who offer support are victims of abuse. Nothing is so bad you can’t about you talk about it. .