The Muppets Right Now by Emily Dufresne Cast: Carmella - Madison Gonzo - Chaya Miss Piggy- Shannon Uncle Deadly- David Janis - Temeka Scooter- Marsche Fozzie Bear- Emily Swedish Chef- Wade Kermit - Chris Animal- Robbie Statler- Sasha Waldorf- Josh C. Dr. Bunsen Honeydew- Patty Beeker- Ryan Plot: The Muppets have a variety show that consists of sketches. The three featured in this musical include, Lifestyle with Miss Piggy, Okey Dokey Kookin with the Swedish Chef, and Kermit the Frog’s special guest interview. Skit 1: Lifestyle with Miss Piggy Carmella- Madison Gonzo - Chaya Miss Piggy- Shannon Uncle Deadly- David Janis - Temeka Carmella: Bahk, bahk, bahk. Gonzo: Right Carmella, welcome back to Life sty with Miss Piggy. Miss Piggy: It’s Lifestyle, not Life- sty, banana beak. Hellooo everyone. Today we are going to talk about self-care. Janis: That’s right girl- we need to like take care of ourselves. Miss Piggy: Janis, what do you do for self-care. Janis: Well, I take a bath in mother nature, by jumping into a mud puddle. How about you Piggy? Miss Piggy: Not every pig likes MUD. Uncle Deadly: Well a good mud bath is very hydrating- and your skin could SURE use it. Miss Piggy: My skin is as moist as milk. High-ya! (Knocks Uncle Deadly out). Janis: Piggy, don’t get so angry- it’s not good for your vibe. Miss Piggy: Huf, huf, maybe you’re right. But instead of mud how about I just rub some honey on my face. Scene Note (She rubs some on and then bees start coming- Piggy runs of screaming) Uncle Deadly: Bee stings are definitely not good for your complexion. Carmella: Bahk, bahk, bahk. Gonzo: You said it Carmella, sometimes mud is better than honey. Skit 2: Okey Dokey Kookin Scooter- Marsche Fozzie Bear- Emily Swedish Chef- Wade Scooter: Welcome to Okey Dokey Kookin with the Swedish Chef. Swedish Chef: Borky dorky Scooter: Our guest today is Chef Fozzie Bear. Fozzie Bear: Wahcka wahcka! Scooter: Chef Fozzie will be showing us how to make brownies today. Fozzie Bear: Knock, knock. Swedish Chef: Doup, doup? Fozzie Bear: Candy. Scooter: Candy who? Fozzie Bear: Candy bear have another brownie… wacka wacka. Scene Note (everyone laughs) Scooter: So Chef Fozzie, how do you make brownies? Fozzie Bear: I melt chocolate bunnies and chocolate milk first. Scooter: Ah, that’s how you make the batter. Fozzie Bear: How is a baseball team like a brownie? Swedish Chef: Doot door know…. Fozzie Bear: They both depend on a good batter! Wacka wacka! Scooter: So Swedish Chef- what goes into your brownie batter? Swedish Chef: Duh. W a t e r M e l o n and chocolate bears…. mere mere. Scooter: I think the Swedish chef wants you to hold the chocolate Fozzie. Scene Note (Fozzie picks up chocolate) Swedish Chef: Choc-late and Bear Yum yum. Fozzie Bear: Is he trying to make me an ingredient? Scooter: Probably- he does this all the time. Fozzie Bear: Here is a joke. When is a bear not an INgredient. Swedish Chef: Doop Doop? Fozzie Bear: When he’s an out- gredient. I’m out of here…Bye! Scooter: Well, join us next time for Chef Kermit the Frog as he prepares a southern favorite. Swedish Chef: Oh boy… Frog Legs. Scooter: Agh. Skit 3: Interview with Kermit Kermit - Chris Animal- Robbie Statler- Sasha Waldorf- Josh C. Dr. Bunsen Honeydew- Patty Beeker- Ryan Kermit: Hi ho. Kermit the Frog here. Today I will be interviewing some of my Muppet friends from our new show Muppets Right Now! (Yayyyyy!) Animal: Right now! Right now! Kermit: Hold on Animal, I wanted to first ask you all, how do you like being back at work? Statler: Who’s working? We’re retired. Waldorff: We’re just here watching the disaster you call a show. Statler: Yeah, and eating the free food. Statler & Waldorff: (both laugh) Kermit: Well people seem to like Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker’s segment “Muppets Field Lab”. Animal: Blow it up, blow it up. Statler: See- look what kind of audience you have. Waldorff: I do laugh when I see the funny guy blow up sometimes. Ha ha ha. Dr. Honeydew: Beaker always does a safety check first. Beaker: Meep, me….? Dr. Honeydew: Yes Beaker. Today we will see what happens when we set of dynamite to music. Beaker: Meep, meep! Kermit: Well, make sure you wear protective headphones Beaker. Animal: Dah dah dah dah dah dah! Bang! Bang! Beaker: Meep- Meep! Statler: Don’t worry Beaker, I’ll catch your ears when they blow of. Waldorff: I even brought my old baseball mitt to catch em. If I do, I’ll say earrrrrr out! Statler & Waldorff: (both laugh) Kermit: Well, not quite the interview I hoped for. Join us next time when I interview, let’s see who’s on the schedule. Oscar the Grouch. Oh boy. Statler: I’ll make sure to tune in. It will be a such a boring show that I will probably fall asleep. Right Waldorf? Waldorff: (snores) Statler: See how boring this show is? He couldn’t stay awake. Animal: Go to sleep. Go to sleep..