1 Men in the Family: Constructions and Performance of Masculinity in England, c.1700-1820 Tul Israngura Na Ayudhya Queen Mary, University of London Thesis submitted for the degree of PhD in History 2014 2 Statement of Originality I, Tul Israngura Na Ayudhya, confirm that the research included within this thesis is my own work or that where it has been carried out in collaboration with, or supported by others, that this is duly acknowledged below and my contribution indicated. Previously published material is also acknowledged below. I attest that I have exercised reasonable care to ensure that the work is original, and does not to the best of my knowledge break any UK law, infringe any third party’s copyright or other Intellectual Property Right, or contain any confidential material. I accept that the College has the right to use plagiarism detection software to check the electronic version of the thesis. I confirm that this thesis has not been previously submitted for the award of a degree by this or any other university. The copyright of this thesis rests with the author and no quotation from it or information derived from it may be published without the prior written consent of the author. Signature: ____________________ Date: ________________________ 3 Abstract This thesis examines the meanings, constructions, and performances of masculinity in the long eighteenth century, c.1700-1820, within familial relationships. Rather than reading the codes of masculinity out of representational sources, the thesis engages with men's lived experiences as depicted in ego-documents, such as letters, diaries, memoirs and autobiographies, in which contemporaries reflected on and made sense of their actions and behaviours. Thus, the work is in essence – what I coin – a cultural history of lived experiences. Rather than analysing men's activities in the public sphere or taking for granted their patriarchal omnipotence in the house, this thesis puts men back into the fundamental unit of human interpersonal relationships: the family ties, which has received less attention by scholars of men's history. Inspired by R. W. Connell's concept of masculinity, the thesis analyses men's lives through three connected themes: gender hierarchy, practices of gendered roles and obligations, and the impact of these practices on family relationships and individuals' characters and personalities. It explores five key male roles and familial identities: suitor, husband, father, son, and brother. It asks, firstly, how masculinity was fashioned within familial contexts; secondly, what the prevailing concepts of manhood were when men's identities changed according to their different familial stations; thirdly, how men performed their gendered roles to their family members to express, negotiate, and gain social recognition of their gender identities. The thesis argues that the family was a crucial locus in which masculinity was engendered, fashioned and performed. It therefore contributes to men's history in general by demonstrating how family ties could shape and fashion male gendered identities through the practices of family duties. Familial relationships did play vital roles helping men to construct and perform masculinity, no less than in public domains or in the possession of a household. 4 Acknowledgements Hereby I confirm that I am writing these acknowledgements without the spirit of Lord Chesterfield's Letters to His Son (1774): My thanks must go first and foremost to my supervisor and my mentor: Amanda Vickery and Joanna Cohen. Amanda was generous enough to accept me as her student four years ago, and has been supervising me with her boundless patience since then. Her stunning academic imagination and suggestions are second to none on earth. Joanna reads my drafts, provides critical feedback and, most notably, always welcomes me with her warm, serene, and genuine character. Two qualities in her personality help me survive in Britain: Menschlichkeit and Herzlichkeit. (There is no equivalent in English for these two German words. I am sure that Joanna will smile when she sees them here.) I am indebted to The Queen Sirikit Scholarship (Thailand) for their boundless financial assistance throughout my study-programme. Without their generosity, I would not have been able to visit many provincial archives, such as the East Sussex Record office at Lewes where a digital camera is not allowed in their reading room, and consequently I had to catch the train from London to Lewes for 17 times to finish reading 1,250 letters of the Collier Collection. I am deeply grateful for the short but powerful conversations with Michèle Cohen, Colin Jones, Naomi Tadmor, and John Tosh. The 40-minute dialogue with John Tosh after a training session at the IHR one day in summer 2012 completely changed the way I saw 'gender relations' and 'masculinity'. I thank him and his genuine soul of being a superb teacher. The errors and undeveloped thought which remain in the following pages are entirely my own. I am also grateful for the support of fellow PhD students: Antonia Brodie, Charlotte Brown, Polly Bull, Sally Holloway, Beth Robinson, Ya-Lei Yen. Special thanks go to Michèle Cohen, Jane Hamlett, Charlotte, Polly, Sally, and Ya-Lei for reading my earlier drafts. Ya-Lei, together with my mentor Joanna, have been the sole oasis of Menschlichkeit and Herzlichkeit for me in the British Isles. 5 Contents page Abstract 3 Acknowledgements 4 Notes on Conventions and Abbreviations 6 Introduction 9 Chapter One: '[T]o make myself worthy of you': Masculine Self-Presentation in Courtship Letters 41 Chapter Two: 'Then “Hail wedded Love!”': Performing Patriarchy in Conjugal Relationships 70 Chapter Three: 'I am, my sweet little Fellow, yr aff[ectiona]te Papa': The Significance of Paternal Obligations in Men's Lives 102 Chapter Four: '[T]ake upon you the Man & the Gentleman': Parents, Sons, and the Construction of the 'Future' Patriarchs 136 Chapter Five: '[H]ad we not had you for our Pilot': Brotherly Masculinity and Sibling Relationships 169 Conclusion 201 Bibliography 213 6 Notes on Conventions and Abbreviations In all quotations from manuscripts, the spelling and grammar used in the original source have been kept throughout. In published versions, I have followed the editor's conventions. In excerpts from manuscripts, all underlined parts are emphases in original, unless otherwise indicated. Archives: BCA Birmingham City Archives BL The British Library, Asia, Pacific, and Africa Collections BRO Berkshire Record Office, Reading CA Coventry Archives CKS Centre for Kentish Studies CRO/Carl Cumbria Record Office, Carlisle Headquarters CRO/Ken Cumbria Record Office, Kendal ERO Essex Record Office ESRO East Sussex Record Office HALS Hertfordshire Archives and Local Studies HRO Hampshire Record Office JRL John Rylands Library, University of Manchester LAD Lambeth Archives Department LMA London Metropolitan Archives LRO Lancashire Record Office LSF Library of the Society of Friends NRO Norfolk Record Office SA Sheffield Archives SHL Senate House Library, University of London ShrA Shropshire Archives WSA Wiltshire and Swindon Archives WSRO West Sussex Record Office Academic Journals: AHR American Historical Review BJECS British Journal for Eighteenth-Century Studies 7 C&C Continuity and Change CI Critical Inquiry CL Country Life CSH Cultural and Social History ECL Eighteenth-Century Life ECS Eighteenth-Century Studies EEH Explorations in Economic History FCH Family & Community History FH French History FS Feminist Studies FT Fashion Theory G&H Gender & History GH German History HE History of Education HF History of the Family HJ Historical Journal H&T History & Theory HT History Today HTe History Teacher HWJ History Workshop Journal IRSH International Review of Social History JAE Journal of Architectural Education JBS Journal of British Studies JECS Journal for Eighteenth-Century Studies JEH Journal of Economic History JEMH Journal of Early Modern History JFH Journal of Family History JH Journal of Homosexuality JHS Journal of the History of Sexuality JSBC Journal for the Study of British Cultures JSH Journal of Social History JSHS Journal of Scottish Historical Studies L&H Literature & History MedH Medical History 8 MH Midlands History NH Northern History NS New Society P&P Past & Present PPA Philosophy & Public Affairs SC The Seventeenth Century SH Social History T&S Theory & Society TP Textual Practice TRHS Transactions of Royal Historical Society, 6th series WHR Women's History Review YFS Yale French Studies 9 Introduction 'Sir, I have given you in haste an account of all the evil in my nature. I have told you of all of the good'. Thus ended the twenty-four-year-old James Boswell's autobiographical essay to be presented to the great philosopher Jean Jacques-Rousseau in 1764. In this composition Boswell recounted his life from his childhood up to the time, including his upbringing, schooling, friendships and amorous adventures. He hoped that his intended audience would read the paper and then be able to answer his vital question: 'Tell me, is it possible for me yet to make myself a man?'1 Boswell's anxiety about the perfection of his gender identity implies that becoming a man was not an 'eternal, timeless essence that resides deep in the heart of every man'.2 Nor does it equate to maleness, that is, a male body. Instead, it is an entirely social construction of ideas about appropriate roles for men. In this sense, manhood, manliness and masculinity denote a 'gender' by which scholars mean, following the famous definition proposed by Joan W. Scott, 'a social category imposed on a sexed body'.3 Moreover, Boswell's uncertainty about the definition of being a man suggests that masculinity is not automatic, but problematic. The present dissertation takes Boswell's question as a starting point. However, while Boswell seemed to believe that masculinity could be completed during a man's formative years (Boswell composed 'the sketch of his life' to measure his gender quality at the age of twenty-four), my thesis will argue that masculinity was constructed, fashioned and negotiated throughout a man's life, through his performance of familial roles and obligations.