After Life: Love Patrick Lee Published by Patrick Lee at Smashwords Copyright 2010 by Patrick Lee Smashwords Edition, License Notes This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author. Table of Contents Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Chapter Fifteen Chapter Sixteen Chapter Seventeen Chapter Eighteen Chapter Nineteen Chapter Twenty Chapter Twenty One Chapter Twenty Two Chapter Twenty Three Chapter 1 “Did you want us to wrap it up for you sir?” The salesman held the small box out, waiting to see if Jackson would take it. When his customer did nothing, he repeated the question. “I’m sorry, what did you ask?” He knew that he heard something from the well- dressed older man who helped him pick out his purchase, but the situation was finally starting to sink in, and he drifted off as he was putting his wallet back into his pants. He had planned this for almost 6 months, and he knew that there was no going back at this point. No one else knew about the plan, so technically he didn’t have to go through if he wasn’t ready, but if he dragged it out any longer, he would just find another reason to talk himself out of it. God knew he had found enough of those over the years, and he wasn’t going to fall into that trap again. In that moment, when the rest of his future solidified for the first real time, he swam back to the others, the ones who hadn’t made the cut. There was Daphne, his first love. She had been the one, at least he thought that she was back then, and she claimed that she felt the same way about him too. She had also been his first, in any number of ways, and it was probably no coincidence that Daphne was the only other one who had inspired a trip to the jeweler. She was convincing enough to make Jackson put a down payment on her dream ring, but God had a good sense of humor, and on that same night she called him at his dorm room to tell him that she thought that they should see other people. He later found out that she only reached that realization after she started seeing these other people, even allowing a few of them into the club that Jackson assumed he had sole rights to. His roommate told him that night after several rounds of Jaeger shots that some monkeys only let go of one branch when they have a firm grasp on another one. The analogy stuck with him for the rest of his life, and the crushing heartbreak that prompted the lesson in the first place would interfere with every other relationship he would ever try to have, until Amanda. He pushed past Daphne, and through the 8 year hiatus that he took from committed relationships, not pausing to remember the sea of faces who filled the void during that time. They all applied for the position of his girlfriend, but none of them could be trusted, or so he believed. They had all come to his bed, hoping to land the man named “One of Charleston’s Most Eligible Bachelor’s” for three years running after his business was bought by Apple, allowing him to retire at the ripe old age of 26. He was handsome enough, he supposed, with thick brown hair that hung low over a forehead that his stylist had called “Neanderthal,” but nowhere nearly attractive enough to justify the amount of attention that was thrown his way. He spent a good deal of his hours working out, mostly as a way to pass time after he realized he didn’t have to work anymore, and the results were noticeable, but again, he wasn’t receiving calls to model for fitness magazines either. Some of the women who pursued him put up a good fight, complimenting his “stunning” brown eyes, or his “strong” chin, to the point where he wondered if they were just paying him compliments from the latest issue of Cosmo. There were more than he cared to count, all of them determined to convince him that they could love him, but The Curse of Daphne was too strong, and he eventually treated them all badly enough to make them leave. Some of them threw things, and some cussed him and his mother, but they all left, just as he hoped that they would. Now, sitting in front of the best jeweler in the state, he couldn’t help but smile as he thought about how he became a self-fulfilling prophecy during those years. By keeping everyone he met at arm’s length, he never met anyone who had time to love him, or to let him love her. It was the loneliness that followed his mother’s death that finally pushed him to try relationships again. His father didn’t live long enough to see his only son graduate high school, and his mother never dated again. In those last days, as she died right in front of him, he wished that she had found someone else to share her life with, even if just for the companionship. Sitting alone in the funeral home as he made her arrangements, he pined for someone to share his pain so that it didn’t crush all the life out of him too. At her funeral, every long-distance friend told him that he needed to find someone, practically begging him to not end up alone like her. They offered their sympathy, most of them people he had never met before, and he listened, numb, considering that he was the last person left in his family. The more they talked, the further he drifted, until he didn’t even hear their condolences anymore. He nodded and smiled, but his tears dried up long before she finally lost her fight, and nobody could really blame him for defaulting to zombie mode in that type of situation. Jackson went on his first real date in almost a decade the night after he buried his mother, with a girl named Tammy. It was a blind date, the type of thing that everyone swears they will never do. In the beginning, he kept himself at a distance, but she disarmed him like a pro, and he found himself thoroughly enjoying her company by the end of the night. He asked her out again, and to his surprise she shot him down. The reality check seemed to snap something in him, and for the first time in his life, he pursued someone. It changed everything for him, and it took him nearly a month to get a second date. The chase awakened a desire for companionship that he swallowed years before, and when they went out again, he pulled out all the stops. A limo pulled up to her front door, filled with roses all around him. He skipped the restaurant, and had a private meal catered for just the two of them. They sat on top of one of the houses on Rainbow Row, the old, colorful southern residences that lined the coast of downtown Charleston. When he went to kiss her at her front door, she laughed. “Something funny?” Jackson made no effort to hide the annoyance in his voice. “No, I’m sorry.” He could see that she was still fighting it back, covering her mouth with the back of her hand. “You’re just trying way too hard. You’re a nice guy Jackson, you really are. There’s no need to show off. This isn’t what girls are looking for. Well, some girls are. But not the ones you want to catch, I can promise you that.” “Didn’t you have a good time?” Being alone for the rest of his life suddenly looked much more attractive than dealing with understanding women for another day. “I had a great time. Everything was perfect, but if this is just the beginning, where can it go from here?” She paused to let the idea sink in for him. “Women are looking for something that lasts, and if it’s this intense now, it can’t keep that up long term.” She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. Confused, he looked up at her. “So can we try again sometime?” She smiled down at him as she opened the door. “Call me. But think about what I said first.” She left him looking at her, and he stood still for at least a minute after the door shut behind her. They dated for several months, but it never progressed the way that he expected it to. After a while, he understood what Tammy represented. She was the transition for him, sent to show him what he needed to know to continue searching for his perfect partner. Their interest in each other, more specifically his interest in her, was fueled entirely by not being able to have her, and she knew that from night one.