Complimentary Holiday 2015 for the Bay Boomer and beyond... Art of Living Winter in the Bay Bay Gardening: Is Life Making Holly is Jolly You Weary? Angels in Our Skies Holiday 2015 1 OutLook FROM THE DESK For the Bay Boomer and Beyond... Publisher and Tecla Emerson Murphy Walk away. Recently I was asked how we keep the peace in Editor-in-Chief [email protected] such a widely diverse family and friends group. Like most families, Managing Editor Mick Rood no two members are alike. We’re made up of artists, executives, [email protected] homemakers, students, small-business owners, sports figures and Operations Cynthia Rott Manager [email protected] everything in between. Their interests range from travel, to getting Art Director Emma Stultz [email protected] kids properly educated, to staying active in their communities, to Columnists Dr. Jim David sports, volunteer groups and, all too often, just getting through [email protected] the week. There are little kids and old people and many nonrelated Michael J. Dodd [email protected] sorta’ family who may as well be related. We give them chores to Victoria Duncan do and errands to run and gentle corrections: no throwing peas at [email protected] the table and you have to wear shoes and shirt to dinner. They’re all Jessica L. Estes [email protected] part of this burgeoning family and we’re interested in their thoughts Ryan Helfenbein [email protected] and opinions. We work hard at hearing them out. Henry S. Parker So what is the answer to keeping the peace? After polling various [email protected] members of this tribe, the overall consensus is to walk away. For this group anyway, it Drs. Passaro and Wooddell www.WPDentalGroup.com seems to work. We all misspeak, we all do things we shouldn’t do, we all have diverse and Contributing Writers Barbara Aiken [email protected] sometimes crazy opinions and very often, we disagree. But is that the time to confront? Joanne R. Alloway Usually not. There are, of course, exceptions - occasions when there is a need to speak [email protected] up. Even then, it can be done gently and without threatening. Often, a 24-hour cooling David P. Davis [email protected] off period cures it. Stephen R. Fleming Interestingly, back in the ‘60s and ‘70s we were taught confrontation is good: Speak www.SRFLifeRetirementCoach.com your piece if you’re not happy with something said or done. Now in hindsight, I am not Janelle Jackson [email protected] so sure that works. I’ve seen long and warm friendships end because one or both parties Peggy Kiefer [email protected] felt it necessary to speak out. If one of them had only held their tongue, perhaps these Leah Lancione “friends” would still be seeking out each other’s company. [email protected] With our extended family, we come very close to living in each other’s pocket and it Kater Leatherman [email protected] often takes some doing to walk away from some conceived insult, misspoken word or an Kathryn Marchi [email protected] opinion we just can’t abide. But walk away we do. Over the years many of us have learned, Elyzabeth Marcussen sometimes the hard way, to temper your remarks, bite your tongue and very often just let [email protected] it go. Think of it this way: Is this going to matter two years from now? Neal Moran [email protected] My good friend, who shall remain nameless, uses the “bobblehead” technique with Ellen Moyer her expanding family. She gives an attentive nod and keeps her opinions to herself, even, [email protected] by the way, if she is specifically asked. She is quite firm in her belief that asking for Rev. Joseph S. Pagano [email protected] someone’s opinion doesn’t necessarily mean one actually wants it! This is not a revelation. Leslie Basil Payne www.LeslieBasilPayne.com You’ve run into this too I’m sure, when you tread lightly when asked for views on a Maureen Smith particular issue. [email protected] Mothers learn early on to choose their battles. They’re confronted daily and Louise Whiteside [email protected] sometimes hourly by possible confrontations, but they learn quickly that you don’t need Advertising Sales Eileen Nonemaker Director [email protected] to see or address everything that their young ones are into. My friend Jan’s rule was: Fire, Circulation Jack Hovey flood or blood, much of the rest of it can be ignored. She was right. [email protected] With the holidays fast approaching, when we’ll be thrown together with family Photographer R.C. Murphy [email protected] and friends we don’t see often enough, maybe it’s a good time to practice the walk-away Subscriptions S. Hill technique. Life seems to go so much more smoothly by keeping many thoughts and [email protected] $24.95 per year (bimonthly - 6 issues) opinions to ourselves. Contact OutLook by the Bay 210 Legion Ave. #6805 From where I sit, it appears that the belaboring of a perceived insult or an opinion Annapolis, MD 21401 410.849.3000 that you don’t agree with is a waste of your precious time. At this advanced age anyway, ISSN#1948-044X it’s a real chore to remember who said what, when and why. Maybe during what should OutLook by the Bay is distributed throughout Anne Arundel County, in sections of the Eastern Shore and Baltimore. It is available free of charge in seniors be fun-packed holidays with lots of catching up to do with people you love, why not centers, county libraries, hotels, coffee shops, doctor offices, supermarkets, senior communities, book stores, restaurants, private clubs, real estate offices, practice the bobblehead or the walk-away technique and just enjoy! health clubs, hospitals and at all of our advertisers and is mailed to select homes in the Bay area. OutLook by the Bay is published bimonthly by OutLook by the Bay, LLC. No part of this magazine may be reproduced in any form without express written consent of the publisher. Information obtained in OutLook by the Bay is protect- ed by the First Amendment of the United States Constitution and is intended for reader interest only. Do not substitute it for the advice of a qualified healthcare professional, legal or financial adviser. Reader discretion is advised. OutLook by the Bay, LLC does not verify the accuracy of any claims made in connection with advertisements and accepts no responsibility for errors and omissions. All rights reserved. Submissions should be sent to [email protected] by the first of the month preceding the publishing date. 2 Holiday 2015 Holiday Edition TABLE OF CONTENTS Features In Every Issue 6 CHRISTMAS TIPS AND TRICKS 4 YOUR THOUGHTS 9 UNIQUE AND WELCOME GIFTS 17 KATERING TO YOUR LIFE: FOR THE HOMEBOUND CONNECTIONS 12 LOWER IMPACT GIFT GIVING FOR 27 CHART YOUR COURSE: THE HOLIDAYS CONTINUING CARE RETIREMENT 13 PERMISSION TO GRIEVE COMMUNITIES 18 FIVE EASY STEPS TO LESS 29 ASK THE UNDERTAKER: HOLIDAY STRESSFUL ENTERTAINING MEMORIES 28 ANGELS IN OUR SKIES 37 BAY REFLECTIONS 34 BEST GIFTS FOR GRANDKIDS 44 BOOKS: OLD, NEW AND OBSCURE 45 DEAR VICKI Articles 46 HOLIDAY QUIZ ACROSTICS 7 SAVE AND SAVOR YOUR STORIES 47 OUTLOOK FOR THE BAY: WINTER 8 WARDING OFF ALZHEIMER'S IN THE BAY 14 THE BACKYARD ORNITHOLOGIST 23 GRANDPARENTS VOLUNTEERING Departments AT SCHOOL 5 BAY HEALTH: PROTECT YOUR 24 IS LIFE MAKING YOU WEARY? TEETH FROM HOLIDAY TREATS 30 THE ART OF LIVING 10 BAY GARDENING: HOLLY IS JOLLY 32 FOR THE LOVE OF QUILTS 11 BAY ENTERTAINMENT: 33 VEHICLE DONATION PROGRAM CELEBRATING 28 YEARS OF 38 WHAT'S IN A NAME? BEAUTIFUL MUSIC 40 OUR CAPITAL CITY 16 BAY GENERATIONS: WHEN FAMILY 42 SPEAKING WITHOUT OFFENDING NEEDS CARE 20 BAY NUTRITION: GOOD HEALTH IS NOT ALWAYS A VITAMIN AWAY 22 BAY TREKKING: CHRISTMAS IN THE BIG APPLE 25 BAY HEALTH: HOW THE OPHTHALMOLOGIST IS TRAINED Bay Bytes 26 BAY GARDENING: NEW PLANTS To check out the validity of a charity FOR THE HOLIDAY SEASON you’re considering, log onto www. BAY NUTRITION: GO NUTS THIS CharityNavigator.org where it lists 36 administrative costs and the percentage HOLIDAY SEASON of funds that actually end up being spent on the cause at hand. 39 FIVE FAVORITE WINTER WALKS 41 BAY ENTERTAINMENT: FAREWELL PARTY Holiday 2015 3 Your Thoughts FIRE EDITORIAL Read the fire experience editorial. How scary for everyone! How lucky for all that you were there. NEA BIG READ My friend had a similar experience. You've done it again! The cover She was at home, smelled the smoke, photo is right on and perfect. Enjoyed tried to put it out, screamed and every article and will be passing my copy neighbors came to the rescue. It was on to others. Especially appreciated for a very short period of time, but the Ellen Moyer article on NEA Big there was amazing damage. I quickly Read. One of the book groups I'm in bought fire extinguishers and signs for is reading Finn, fiction about Huck's my new home. father, and I'm also reading Huck Finn The editorial was right on target and now I'll add Tom Sawyer and see and sent an important message out to about getting involved in the project. all. Terry S., Annapolis Joan V., Crownsville 4 Holiday 2015 Bay Health Protect Your Teeth from Holiday Treats! By Janelle Jackson If it seems like everywhere you turn there are sweet treats teeth.