<p> Potsdam Fibromyalgia Support Group Newsletter February, 2012 Emotions and Pain  Anger/rage: Shouting, becoming violent or We know that emotions can affect pain. abusive, putting other people down, Depression, sadness, anxiety and anger can all insisting that you are right. amplify pain. Joy, contentment, calmness and o Annoyance/anger: Asserting yourself in a curiosity can decrease pain. We can learn to respectful but firm way, being willing to listen recognize our emotions and decide whether to and consider the other person’s point of view, those emotions are appropriate and healthy. keeping calm or mildly annoyed. Although it takes work, we can also learn to  Guilt: Taking too much responsibility for change our behaviors and thought processes, something that went wrong, avoiding which can alter our emotions. Cognitive people you feel you have wronged, behavioral therapy (CBT), which teaches how avoiding situations because you feel badly to modify behaviors and thought processes, is about them. an important part of a comprehensive pain o Remorse: Facing the person you may have management program. The following wronged and asking forgiveness, taking discussion is summarized from the responsibility for your actions but not Cognitive Behavioral Therapy feeling like you are a bad person because Workbook for Dummies by Rhena of it. Branch and Rob Wilson.  Hurt: Sulking, hinting at what someone Sometimes we don’t actually know how might have done wrong without we feel. This is especially true for people communicating openly, expecting who have been traumatized (and had to suppress someone else to fix the problem. their emotions) or people dealing with very difficult o Disappointment: Voicing your feelings issues (such as having a disability). We can gain assertively but not aggressively, giving the other insight into how we feel by looking at what we do person a chance to explain or apologize, being (our behavior) or what we want to do (our willing to take action to fix the problem tendencies). The CBT for Dummies book has a list  Envy: Spoiling another’s enjoyment of of behaviors or tendencies associated with something you want but don’t have, sour unhealthy emotions and those that are associated grapes, pretending you don’t really want with the corresponding healthy emotion. Below are what they have. a few of the unhealthy/healthy emotion pairs. For Desire: Striving to obtain something you desire example, ‘anxiety’ is an unhealthy emotion while o ‘concern’ is healthy. Remember that you don’t need without harming someone else, allowing others to actually act in these ways to feel the emotions – to enjoy what they have, admitting that you you just need to want to act these ways – those are want something another person has. the action tendencies. Now that we know the emotions, how can we figure out what we are feeling? CBT teaches a process  Anxiety: Avoiding threat, seeking for thinking things through. Here is an excessive reassurance, obsessing with example: worry Question Sample Response Concern: Acknowledging threats, seeking o Event reasonable reassurance, developing plans for Family member said my what can be changed. fibromyalgia pain wasn’t real What did I I shouted at him about how he actually do? doesn’t believe me. I complained about all the rotten things he (dirty clothes and dishes). Assuming does, like leave dirty clothes that he intends to be hurtful. Not around the house or dishes in the talking about things. sink. I stormed around the house Healthier Annoyance/assertiveness, and threw things. I refused to emotion: disappointment. talk to him the rest of the day. Healthier Remember we had a nice dinner What did I feel I wanted to kick him out of the focus yesterday and he does care about like doing? house. I wanted to make him me. He doesn’t understand fibro. He hurt as much as I do. doesn’t know how much it hurts that Does my No he doesn’t believe me; he doesn’t behavior fit intend to say hurtful things. with a healthy Alternative emotion? Tell him that I know he cares about behavior: My emotional Unhealthy rage/anger, hurt me but his support would be so much label: more helpful to me than criticism. I Once this process gives you some insight into should have asked him to come to what emotions you are feeling, it still takes some the support group meeting to talk work to find out why. Furthermore, it’s hard to with other people, so he could see change emotions just by deciding to. One strategy is that fibro pain is real. I should tell to figure out how your attention is focused – what him I am disappointed that he you notice, which memories you recall, what doesn’t believe in me and I have to thoughts you dwell on. The following list describes go through this alone. possible attention focus for the unhealthy and This example of CBT shows how we can learn healthy emotions described above. to understand where our emotions come from. Then  Anxiety: You overestimate the threat, we can make choices about how we think and underestimate your ability to deal with it, behave (hence the “cognitive-behavioral” process). spend too much time obsessing about it. By changing some of our negative and unhealthy o Concern: You have a realistic view of the threat emotions into healthier, more appropriate emotions, and acknowledge your ability to cope with or we can help emotions relieve pain rather overcome the threat. than aggravate it.  Anger/rage: Focus on evidence or suggestion of malicious intent from Vitamin D and Fibromyalgia others, remember or obsess over other A recent study found that 61/100 women with FM had vitamin D deficiencies. reasons to be angry with this person. Vitamin D supplementation resulted in o Annoyance/anger: Assume that people don’t significant improvement in 42 of the 61 people intend to hurt you, remember positive things and with deficiency. This study was performed in Saudi not just negative things. Arabia; it is likely that people who live in northern  Hurt: Focus on how badly you have been regions with less sunlight will have greater chance of treated and how unfair the treatment is; vitamin D deficiency. Has your physician checked your dredge up past hurts to prove the person vitamin D levels? is uncaring.  Matthana MH. The relation between vitamin D deficiency and fibromyalgia syndrome in women. o Disappointment: You see or remember evidence Saudi Med J. 2011; 32(9):925-9. that the person does care, realize that the person did not intend to hurt you, do not dredge up past February Potsdam Meeting: hurts. The next meeting of the Potsdam Fibromyalgia Support Group will be Monday, February 27th, 4-5 pm. This will be a Once this process gives you some insight into what guided discussion: “The role of anger in emotions you are feeling, you can think through chronic pain, and strategies for alternative emotions and behaviors. managing anger.” NOTE EARLY Question Sample Response TIME! We switch back to summer Unhealthy Remembering past events that are hours in March. The group will meet at focus not related to the current issue Clarkson Hall, at 59 Main St. For information about meetings, contact CPH Physical Therapy Department at 261-5460. Massena Meetings: The Massena Support Group meets on the 2nd Saturday of each month. For more information about the Massena group, please contact facilitator Maxine Dodge, at 769-5778. </p><p>This newsletter is a joint effort of Clarkson University and Canton-Potsdam Hospital. If you would prefer to receive these newsletters electronically, please send your email address to [email protected]. You can access current and previous Potsdam Fibromyalgia Support Group Newsletters on our web site: www.people.clarkson.edu/~lnrussek/FMSG. </p>