<p> Mastering Difficult Family Conversations in Surgical Care</p><p>Cue Cards: Effective Words for End of Life</p><p>Common Understanding: What the Family Knows</p><p>Try Saying This Avoid Saying or Doing This “Have you seen your mom today? How do you think she is doing?” “What do you understand about your mother’s “I assume you know what is going on with your situation so far?” mother.” (Sounds presumptuous, cuts off communication) “What information do you have about her “What have the nurses told you?” (May suggest condition?” you distrust the nurses, don’t know, or are fishing to see if the care team is on the same page) “Have you been able to visit with your mom and get a sense for how she is doing?” “Have you been involved with her care? [If so], “Tell me how you’ve been helping her.” “What are you wondering or worrying about right now? I have some things to review with you, but are there any questions you want to ask right away?” “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to start at the beginning and recap your mom’s care, but tell me if I am covering things you already know.”</p><p>1</p>