M RANGE FOA RS THE FOAM RANGERS EST. 1981 BBrreewwsslleetttteerr UUrrqquueellll H O N M TO It's Before 9 A.M. Somewhere! February 2011 - Volume 31 Pints - Issue 2 EBR US EW CLUB - HO DeFalco’s Rocked In this Issue: By “Leaky Wicks” Minutes & MCAB 2 Scandal. By Bev Blackwood & Steve Moore Febrewarys DeFalco’s owner Scott Birdwell is on the Past 3 verge of ousting the Foam Rangers from the shop premises due to the influence of Glory Days 4 the”leaky wicks” scandal. The Foam Rangers, with their Many leaky wicks lead to a 9 A.M. Already? 5 preponderance of male members and major problem at DeFalco’s. the massive amounts of beer available outhouse!” She glares across to the at meetings often find themselves at the homebrew shop “Those boys be leakin’ on Incriminating mercy of the “one holer” bathroom. “God my doorstep and I am going to start kickin’ Evidence 6-7 forbid a woman gets in there!” Bemoans their behinds!” an unidentified Ranger, “We would all be Birdwell, in the throes of trying to move his Snowflakes & out the door!” Indeed, that seems to be the shop isn’t happy about the situation either. major issue (as it were) as Foam Rangers Plain Ol’ Flakes 9 “You know, they could cross their legs for a “leak” in (and on) the surrounding premises. bit” he gripes. “But NO...” He’s been hit with “I come in Saturday mornings after a penalties and threats of being cut off from Fred Fights For meeting” complains the hairdresser Mastercard and Visa, who are responding to Beer! 10 next door, “and it smells like my mama’s complaints from the surrounding merchants. (Continued on page 10) Braggot Buzz 11 Out (of) The Wazoo Get Listed! 12 By Kyle Jones, this day, the first thing I reached for after Grand Wazoo coming home from work was a Bigfoot or a Celebration. Now, the first thing I reach Foam Ranger for is still a cause for celebration (and a membership Celebration at times), but found in her swing increases by one! instead of my refrigerator. A new passion has taken residence in my heart, one that in February January 31, 2011. some ways is a perfect fit with homebrewing. From this day How, you say? All-grain brewing is full of forward, my life dead time, useful for holding, burping, and Meeting: would never be the changing a two-week old baby. Mash in, same. A different wait 45 minutes. Start the boil and sanitize Friday, set of priorities, and equipment, wait 60 minutes. Time that life viewed from a used to be spent goofing off or daydreaming new perspective. I’ve always believed is now put to good use – an increase in February 18th that creating a beer is a thing of beauty, efficiency! creating a life is on another plane entirely. I’ve had nine months to prepare, but what 7:00 p.m. Now bags of grain have been replaced with could possibly prepare you for something bags of diapers, the sweet intoxication of like this? I think back to my first batch of at DeFalco’s alcohol by lack of sleep. Carboys by car homebrew, and I find some comforting seats, pediococcus by pediatricians. Before (Continued on Page 8) Page 2 The Brewsletter Urquell - Volume 31, Number 2 - February 2011 The Brewsletter Urquell Foam Rangers Get Rowdy... Again! Official Organ of the By loud to which we all agreed. Peter Lott, Attending Officers: Foam Rangers Homebrew Club. Scrivener Waz - Kyle, Secondary – Jamie, Scrivner Grand Wazoo: – Pete, Was Waz – Doak, Dixie Cup Kyle “Call Me Daddy” Jones January’s meeting: coordinator Party Boy - Roland and his [email protected] Porters & Stouts Better Half Melissa. [and Competition Secondary Fermenter: were served. Coordinator & Brewsletter Editor Bev, albeit Jaime “Too Loud” Robles It was announced by a bit tardy. -Ed.] [email protected] a very LOUD Waz The Dixie Cup Theme will be: The Dixie Cup Scrivener: that we now have Goes Down... Under. Peter “Heavily Edited” Lott PayPal as a means Current volunteers are: [email protected] to pay your dues. DO John Gonzales – Graphics Purser: IT NOW! Sly Bastards – Pub Crawl Sharon “Pay Your Dues” Hayes [email protected] The first Foam Rangers Club Only Sound by Mosher Competition will start in February so you Head Steward – Will Holobowicz Competition Coordinator: Bev “Glory Days“ Blackwood II better start brewing. There is a mention of A lot of the talk centered around keeping [email protected] the club campout April 1-3 and confirmed Saint Arnold happy with the Foam Rangers Bozo Head of Special Events: by Kyle so start packing. There will be so they will continue to be so kind as to Scott “Too Loud” Birdwell help needed before the campout and after allow us to store the Dixie Cup entries in [email protected] cleanup and burial of the dead. thier cold box and do First Round judging Was Waz: PAY YOUR DUES. there. Kyle thinks we (I.E. The Club) should Doak “Get Off Me Scott” Procter Erik Ribero (Pig Boy) is the Food God so take out an ad in the Houston Chronicle [email protected] give him a hand or a pig or just help. thanking St Arnold and DeFalco’s for their Brewsletter Staff and The AHA Rally at St. Arnolds is coming long time support. We have afair amount of Other Slaves: up on February 27th. For those interested money so this concept will be brought up at Editor: [or those just wishing to hum the Imperial the meeting. Bev “[-Ed.]” Blackwood March from Star Wars - Ed.] there will be Many Speakers were discussed but sooner [email protected] more information at the February meeting. or later someone has to call them? Whoever Food God: Blue Bonnet entries will be picked up at they are: Kyle?? Erik “Pig Boy” Ribeiro the February meeting by Bev. [Please have Remember the Club Competition is this Extra Articles By: your paperwork in order. -Ed.] Friday promptly (right, sure, you bet) at 7 Thomas Coburn Scott is selling Girl Scout cookies so please p.m. Buck Wyckoff see to it that the DeFalco’s heiress makes The ownership of the Houston Carboys is Ella Grace appears courtesy of: her quota. still up for discussion so if anyone wants/ Marisa and Kyle Jones The usual rants were heard at the Raffle as needs to be an investor please see Doak for Webmaster: usual; at which time the meeting fell apart in up to the minute information. Beto Zuniga [email protected] typical fashion. THE ABOVE COMMENTS MAY The Officers meeting was held in the OR MAY NOT BE AN ACCURATE Mail Guru and Unix Geek: Gingerman’s beer garden and we/Scott/ REPRESENTATION OF ACTUAL FACTS. David Cato [email protected] Allison/Jamie were told we were being too Ask Scott and Jaime; They were too loud. The Brewsletter Urquell is published by the Foam Rangers Foam Rangers Impress at MCAB Homebrew Club, 8715 Stella Link, Houston, Texas 77025 By Bev Blackwood II ing Event, such as the Bluebonnet Brew-Off or the Dixie Cup. Of the Foam Rangers who ©2011 Foam Rangers qualified, Rolland Pate brought All articles may be reprinted with- The Foam Rangers hosted The out permission, provided proper thirteenth Masters Championship back a Gold medal for his ESB credit is given to both the author of Amateur Brewing (MCAB) at III in the English Pale Ale cat- and the Foam Rangers and a case of really good homebrew is sent Saint Arnold Brewing Company egory and a Silver for his Wacky in tribute. on January 23rd. The entire Wheat KC in the Light Hybrid Once again, all my articles were in on time... Way to go officers! Of event was held in one day with Beer category. Bev Blackwood course, without Thomas & Buck’s 215 total entries being judged. won a Gold medal for his Belgian articles, I’d still be in a world of Golden Strong Ale, Brewday hurt, space wise. Thanks to them Grand Wazoo Kyle Jones headed as well! It’s amazing how busy the event with help from Foam Belgian (which was originally things can get all of a sudden and Ranger officers and members brewed for the March 2010 Foam this Brewsletter is just the start of the Foam Ranger “busy season” along with judging help from all Rangers meeting) in the Belgian that lasts until June or July. Good Houston area clubs. MCAB brewers qualify Strong Ale category. Be sure to congratu- thing there’s barleywine to keep the editor sane until then! to enter by winning first place at a Qualify- late our MCAB winners! The Brewsletter Urquell - Volume 31, Number 2 - February 2011 Page 3 themselves at each major (club) event This keeps club cohesion in order. Other Beer of the Month This Month members are urged to promote club in Foam the humiliation through peer pressure and alcohol.” Scrivener Andy Thomas Calendar Ranger writes some drivel about erections at ✯ the January meeting and the sheriff History being a near. An article announcing the January 20th, 2012 availability of St. Arnold Cask Conditioned Porter & Stout By Sean Lamb, Club Amber Ale forces shouts of joy from every ★ Historian (Sorta) member who reads it. The picture pages include postcards from Florida showing February 18th, 2011 the Dixie Cup standing in for a Xmas tree 20 Years Ago: stand and partying with the Sunshine Cup Barleywine & Holiday Beer on New Year’s Eve. ✯ In the Brewsletter: Editors John and Carmen At the Meeting: Held at Steve Moore’s Donaldson beg for someone to set them free ”humble bachelor abode” Wes Woods March 18th, 2011 from the purgatory that is cranking out the is unable to keep the Fez on due to Belgian Ales & Lambics best damn homebrew club publication on the his massive cranium.