LMR 03 - Week 19 Destiny's Nephew

LMR 03 - Week 19 Destiny's Nephew

LMR 03 - Week 19 Destiny's Nephew If you didn't enjoy last week's Division Playoffs, you don't have a pulse. The action was so intense that it reminded the Look Man of, well, it was like no other week in NFL Playoff history. Sure there have been some great single games in the playoffs. Games like The Drive, The Fumble, The Catch, The Tuck, The Sea of Hands, the Immaculate Reception, Air Coryell vs. the Killer Bees, and The Freezer Bowl have captured our imagination. But never in the Look Man's memory, has every single Divisional Playoff game come down to a single possession to determine the outcome. Here are but a few of the Greatest Games in NFL playoff history: • 1972 NFC semis: Cowboys 30, 49ers 28 ... Staubach led 17-point 4th quarter at Candlestick vs. John (Jaws) Brodie • 1975 NFC semis: Cowboys 17, Vikings 14 … the first "Hail Mary" - Staubach to Drew Pearson • 1977 AFC semis: Raiders 37, Colts 31 (2 OT) .. The "Ghost to the Post," Stabler to Casper • 1986 AFC semis: Browns 23, Jets 20 (2 OT) … "The Bernie, Bernay Game", Kosar and the Browns score 10 points in the final 4 minutes, and win in OT. Kosar throws 64 times for 489 yards on the day. • 1989 AFC semis: Browns 34, Bills 30 … "Clay Day/Clay Day!" - LB Clay Matthews INT at 1- yard line with 3 seconds left seals it (included a pick by Felix Wright on Don Beebe that was miscalled) • 1998 NFL wild card: 49ers 30, Packers 27 ... Young to Owens with 3 seconds left • 1998 NFC championship: Falcons 30, Vikings 27 (OT) ... Gary Anderson misses first FG of season with 2:10 left, Falcons then tie it and win in OT • 1999 AFC wild card: Titans 22, Bills 16 ... The Music City Miracle • 2001 AFC semis: Patriots 16, Raiders 13 (OT) ... The Tuck But never before on a single weekend have we had 2 out of 4 games go to OT, including a double OT thriller, PLUS the other 2 games coming down to the final possession. If this keeps up, the 2003-04 NFL Playoffs will make watching the 2003 major league baseball playoffs seem like watching folks play checkers by comparison. TN Flaming Thumbtacks at New England Clam Chowders: Co-MVP Steve (Air) McNair and the TN Flaming Thumbtacks rolled into the cold, crisp night air of Gillette Stadium to play the Beantown Clam Chowders last week. The Chowds had a perfect record at the Blade, including some comeback wins. This game figured to be a low scoring defensive battle and it didn't disappoint. Chowds' QB Tom Greg Brady showed no evidence of a bad wheel, and threw a nice first quarter bomb to WR David Givens to open up the scoring. The Thumbtacks defense stiffened after a first quarter injury forced Chowds center Damien Woody to the bench. Afterwards, RB Antwoine Smith found few holes to run in, and Air McNair and Co. came roaring back in the 4th quarter. WR Drew (Harve) Bennett made some scintillating catches but couldn't convert on a very makeable 4th down. The catch would have put the Tacks in FG range with a chance to tie the score at 17. Instead, as the Look Man predicted, the Zebras called everything but chicken claws on the Tacks, giving the win to the Chowds. The game was unusual in that the 2 teams combined for 76 attempted passes despite the subzero wind chill. It was so cold that Tacks O-lineman Zach (Cat-a)Piller said, "Man, I can't feel my hands or my feet. I'm starting to freak out." Nonetheless, both the Chowds and Tacks continued to throw the football, and except for Bennett's drop in crunch time, did very well. Game of the Week: Carolina Confederate Black Cats @ St. Louis Mouflons: The Confederacy charged into St. Lew looking for no Compromise in Missouri. After calling a great game last week, Carolina Offensive Coordinator Dan Henning called another gem, this time against the Greatest Show on Turf. Mike (Megalomaniac) Martz decided to go pass-happy with one of the greatest running backs in history. As a result, he and the Lambs are staying home for MLK Day, while the Black Cats move on to Philly for the NFC Championship game. The game started slowly, with RB Stephen (Jefferson) Davis missing some gigantic holes created by his mammoth offensive line. After several opportunities created by Marc (the Scarecrow) Bulger's picks, Davis rumbled for 60 plus yards on a single play. Not since the Last Charge at Appomattox had the Confederacy shown this much heart. Unfortunately, like the War of Northern Aggression, the President of the Confederacy got injured on the play, and had to stay out of the fighting for the rest of the war. His replacement was a Look Man favorite, RB DeShaun (Bananas) Foster, who promptly hit the holes that Jeff Davis had largely missed. Bananas lived up to his name and set up a nice scoring opportunity for QB Jake (the Man) Delhomme. The Man tried to lateral to Bananas for the score on 3rd and goal, but his arm was tipped. The resultant fumble was batted by Bananas, muffed by the Lambs DE Grant Wistrom, and ended up in the hands of Carolina WR (Bullwinkle) Muhsin Muhammad. Bullwinkle yelled from the pileup, "Hey, Rocky. Want to see me pull a rabbit out of a hat. Oops. Wrong hat." The hat was all right with the Black Cats, who went up 7-6 and never looked back. K John Kasay (Kasem) kept his kicks reaching for the stars and knocked down 3 to put the Panthers up 11. Unfortunately, Referee Mike (Jim) Carey and his company of Zebras called 13 penalties for 92 yards a week after Carolina got zero in a 29-10 victory over Dallas. Carey wasn't smokin', but regained his status as the best in the business by overturning some heinous holding calls and upholding some difficult replays. Still, there could be no question that the refs kept the GSOT in the game. After scoring a referee-aided TD and a 2-point conversion, the Mouflons were 3 points from overtime, perched to score a TD for a regulation win. Fresh off of a bye, they wore down the Black Cats defense and could have iced it with a TD. Instead Megalo Martz went conservative and kicked the FG to tie and go to overtime. In OT, The Scarecrow threw a pass that CB (The Tribe's) Rick Manning picked off in front of Torry (The Wood Nymph) Holt. Delhomme quickly parlayed that into a missed FG attempt. After the GSOT returned the favor on an incredible succession of missed tries by 2 great kickers, the Cats broke it wide open with a skinny post to WR and NBA guard Steven Smith. Smith decided not to dribble but instead took the orange to the rack for a game winning TD. Smith, known for his infamous punching out of a rookie WR last season, yelled something to would-be tackler Jason Sehorn like, "Take this @sskicking whitcha!" He also questioned Angie Harmon's taste in husbands. So as predicted, the GSOT goes down like free beer in the Edward (Joe Turkey) Jones Dome. Carolina is the real deal, with the ability to run AND stop the run. The Iggles had better watch their collective sixes on Sunday; this team can shoot it off. Indy Horsies @ KC Baby Backs: Over in the Junior Circuit, the KC Baby Backs were coming off a bye week to play the Indianapolis Horsies at "the toughest stadium for a road team in the NFL". Granted Agarn Stadium is loud, and its denizens bleed yellow and red, but that moniker is tough to defend. CBS TV installed noise meters at Agarn. When the locals got wind of the news, they accommodated by rivaling jet engine noise levels whenever the Horsies possessed the rock. The Look Man wonders: if a stadium had a game and there were no TV cameras, would anyone even know about it? It didn’t matter much; Manning is so used to his football-challenged Hoosiers cheering loudly when he has the ball anyway. So the ExtraTerrestrial Peyton Manning paid a collect call home on Sunday as and the Horsies invaded the Show Me State. ET was nothing short of spectacular, with a 138 QB rating and a masterful game. The Horsies trampled all over the Baby Backs defense, scoring every time they had the ball. Manning spread the ball around like an intergalactic hockey puck, hitting WRs (Starvin) Marvin Harrison, Reggie (Millionaire Playboy Bruce) Wayne and Brandon Stokely (Carmichael) as well as Edge from the U, and TE Marcus Pollard. ET went as far as to get a TD pass to seldom-used FB Jim Lopienski from the TV series Taxi. Apparently, Judd Hirsh couldn't suit up for the game. Dick (The Crying Man) Vermeil knew it would be a long day if he couldn’t go hoof to hoof with them, so he opened up his offense and gambled on 4th down. The result was that the punters for both teams got the day off, and decided to go to the local rib shack. Indy's guy, Hunter (the Punter) Smith did have a FANTASTIC hold on a late FG to Mike (Yacht Boy) Vanderjagt. The FG was critical and put the onus on KC to come roaring back and score a TD in that situation. The snap landed flat but HTP snatched it up and kept Yacht Boy perfect on the year.

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