בסד Shabbat Parshat Vayera Friday, 16 Cheshvan 5769 – November 14 2008 L ’Chaim WWW.YESHIVA.ORG.AU Make Up Your Mind Why can't I make up my mind? - Have you ever asked yourself that? Living with the We've all encountered that problem when having to make decisions. Sometimes the decisions are minor, even trivial: should I wear the brown shoes or the black shoes? Rebbe Sometimes the decisions are only momentarily important. When we're grocery shopping, for instance, we may stand for a few minutes debating This week's Torah portion, Vayeira, speaks about the which breakfast cereal to buy. greatness of our forefather Abraham, the very first Sometimes the decisions are important, but not significant. When Jew. Through Abraham's service, G-d's Name was choosing a car, for instance, a lot of features - an iPod dock, a dark blue made known throughout the world, and many people interior - may be important, but they're not significant. were brought to believe in Him. Other decisions are much more critical: a choice of occupation, a choice The Torah states: "And Abraham planted an eishel of spouse, how to handle a conflict with a child or parent - or boss. [literally a grove] in Be'er Sheva, and called there in In all these cases we have to make a decision, and often just can't make the name of G-d." The Torah specifically mentions up our minds, agonizing over the possibilities, unsure of what's the best Abraham's planting of the eishel, as this was route - or the right thing. considered a very great deed and a unique And sometimes even after we've made a decision, we revisit it, debating accomplishment. it again, doubting the decision - more, doubting ourselves. The Midrash explains that an eishel is more than just There's a word for this: ambivalence. Psychiatrists describe it as the a stand of trees under which wayfarers may find feeling of being torn between opposing paths. protection from the burning sun. An eishel is an inn, a We often think that, when it comes to decisions, we should be decisive. place of lodging. Our Patriarch Abraham established We should know our minds, be able to total pros and cons like a ledger his eishel in Be'er Sheva, in the heart of the desert, to and choose. cater to travelers in that inhospitable climate. In fact, though, if the choice was so obvious, there would be no choice. Did Abraham know these travelers personally? Of All real decisions involve some degree of ambivalence and uncertainty. course not. He had no idea who might arrive. All he We have to recognize that ambivalence is part of the process, that we knew was that these strangers would no doubt be can't make up our minds until we go through the uncertainty and, yes, hungry, thirsty and tired from their trek across the discomfort of considering consequences, of realizing that every decision desert. His motivation was to make their journey more involves risk. We have to see that ambivalence is itself "a tool for exploring pleasant and less taxing. alternatives and seeing the larger picture." Abraham provided his guests with all kinds of A famous story of Reb Levi Yitzchak of Berditchev goes something like amenities, not just bread and water to satisfy their this: arguing with G-d that He should be lenient in judging people, he said: hunger and quench their thirst. His visitors were "You put the difficulties of observing commandments in this world and the offered meat, fine wines, fruit and a wide array of rewards in the next, the pleasures of sin in this world and the punishment delicacies, as well as a place to sleep to rest from their in the next. Reverse the placement and You will see how little people sin travels. and how many mitzvot they do." His visitors' spiritual needs were also taken into Experiencing doubt and uncertainty - ambivalence - shouldn't stop us consideration. Next to the inn that provided all their from making a decision. On the contrary, when we feel ambivalent, we know we have a decision to make. physical necessities, Abraham established a And here the ambivalence itself can tell us which decision to make. For Sanhedrin, a court of law, so that wise men could instance, you've started trying to keep kosher. You stopped eating answer the travelers' questions and find solutions to cheeseburgers, or gave up shellfish and non-kosher meat. And now you're their personal and business problems. debating, is this enough? How will taking the next step affect your life? This same attribute of kindness and justice is the What will my (fill-in-the-blank: parents, friends, children) say? birthright of every Jew, an inheritance from our Or let's say you're already keeping kosher, but you learn about a higher forefather Abraham. And the Torah portion of Vayeira standard. Should you go there? It's inconvenient, it'll be more expensive, teaches us how we are supposed to fulfill the mitzva but, it's really the best way to go. In these cases - and many more (should I make a commitment to that of tzedaka (charity): weekly Torah class?) - we have to make a decision. And we have to be It isn't enough to provide a poor person with the honest with ourselves about our ambivalence. Because, whatever we basic requirements necessary to sustain life. We must choose, we're going to be uncomfortable, for a while, and we may even offer him more than just the bare minimum, bringing have second thoughts. him pleasure and enjoyment. And not only must his But that's where a teaching from the Tanya, the primary work of Chabad physical needs be met, but we must also try to help philosophy comes in: only the tzadik, the completely righteous individual, him resolve his spiritual struggles. This applies to doesn't have any internal conflict, any ambivalence. every single Jew, even those we do not know The rest of us, we were born to struggle, to constantly confront personally, and constitutes the true meaning of the ambivalence - should we do the mitzva (commandment) or not? - precisely so we could make the right decision. commandment of tzedaka. And when it comes to matters of Judaism, the Tanya tells us, G-d Himself Adapted from Likutei Sichot, Volume 3 is there to help us make up our mind. L’Chaim Weekly Newsletter Aliyot Summary General Overview: In this week's Torah reading, Vayeira, angels visit world was destroyed, Lot's daughter's intoxicated their father with wine, Abraham and Sarah, informing them that Sarah would give birth to a child and seduced him – in order to repopulate the world. They each gave birth despite her advanced age. The angels whisk Lot and his daughters out of to a son – the antecedents of the Ammonite and Moabite nations. Sodom, and overturn and destroy the entire region. Abimelech, king of the Abraham relocated to the Philistine city of Gerar. Abimelech, the king of Philistines, attempts to make Sarah part of his harem, but through divine the Philistines, took Sarah – who was presented as Abraham's sister – to intervention she is released unharmed. Isaac is born and Ishmael is his palace. G‑d afflicted the members of Abimelech's palace with a expelled from Abraham's household. Abraham makes a peace treaty with disease, and appeared to Abimelech in a dream warning him to return Abimelech. The story of the "Binding of Isaac" is recounted – Isaac's "near- Sarah to her husband, Abraham. Abimelech obeyed, and also showered sacrifice" experience. Abraham and Sarah with gifts, and he and his household were healed. First Aliyah: G‑d paid Abraham a visit, as he sat at the entrance of his tent. Sarah conceived, and at the age of ninety gave birth to a son, who was Abraham suddenly noticed three travelers passing by, and ran to invite them named Isaac. Abraham circumcised Isaac when he was eight days old. into his home. These passersby, who were actually angels in human Fifth Aliyah: Isaac grew, and Sarah noticed that Ishmael, Isaac's older disguise, accepted the invitation, and Abraham and Sarah prepared a half-brother, was a potentially negative influence on her young child. She sumptuous feast for them. The angels informed Abraham that Sarah would demanded of Abraham to expel Ishmael, along with his mother Hagar, give birth to a child exactly one year later. Eighty-nine-year-old, post- from the household. Despite Abraham's initial misgivings, G‑d tells him: menopausal Sarah, who was standing nearby, heard this assurance, and "Whatever Sarah tells you, listen to her voice!" Hagar and Ishmael laughed. G‑d was displeased with Sarah's lack of faith. wandered in the desert and eventually ran out of water. Ishmael was Second Aliyah: The angels departed, with Abraham escorting them on about to perish from thirst when an angel "opened Hagar's eyes" and their journey. Their destination: the Sodom region; their mission: to destroy showed her a well of water. Ishmael grew up in the desert and became a the five cities of the region, and rescue Lot (Abraham's nephew) and his skilled archer. family, who resided there. G‑d informed Abraham of His intention to destroy Sixth Aliyah: At that point, Abimelech approached Abraham and Sodom because of the great evil of its inhabitants. Abraham attempted to requested to enter into a treaty with him, whereby neither party will harm save the region, asking that it be spared if it contains fifty righteous people.