Monday 25th September, 2006 11 Kuala Lumpur – Remember if you brow. It was about 2.06 pm. Meckiff will, Yahaluweni, the clumsy efforts of again ran in off his short run-up . the George (WMD) Bush when visiting crowd hushed and again came the call Pakistan not so long ago. There he was, 'No b-a-I-I!' from Egar. The spectators facing a few Pakistan net bowlers and now reacted angrily and booed the making a fool of himself again. Inzamam and Ponting need umpire. It was ugly all right. Did Bush, though, when talking to Benaud moved over to Meckiff as the Pakistan's President Pervez Musharraf atmosphere in the ground became super- the other day, bring up the subject of charged and spectators boiled with rage. how Pakistan were going to handle the 'Well, Meck, I think we've got a bit of Darrell Hair issue? Highly unlikely. The a problem, don't you. I don't quite know pretentious Yanks pretend they know a to know the laws what we should do,' he said, as the cat- lot about most things, but hairy subjects calling of the umpires went on. 'Either as ball tampering is a bit beyond their after Hair offered to quit for US$500,000. Aussie vernacular, challenging man would curse the umpire. Quirk bowl as quickly as you can, or bowl it grasp of intellect. That’s as crass as England coach David Tendulkar who was allowed to carry on later became a radio and television slow and get through the over.' 'Hair?' asked a mystified Condoleezza (Bumble) Lloyd and his famous remarks his innings. Whether this was the rea- announcer, and reminded in a radio Stunned and upset as he was, Meckiff Rice, touching her latest coiffure style. in Zimbabwe in 1996/97 'We murdered son for Tendulkar to throw it away commentary session one afternoon of chose the latter suggestion: he wanted There is nothing wrong with her hair them, anyone could see that' when in almost immediately with a poorly-direct- his habit in club matches, admitted he the over finished and the gut-aching she insists. All neat and all in place. fact they had played pretty badly in the ed drive aim at a Brett Lee delivery is would try to burgle the last wicket ordeal over. It was a 12-ball over (all This week, however, in London, the Africa leg of that tour. another matter. Give the bowler the ben- before lunch. Haddin of course would bowled to Goddard) with Meckiff called hairy subject of ball tampering comes Someone needs to be held accountable efit of the doubt here for a change than not go that far. twice more by Egar before retiring to the before Ranjan Madugalle, chief ICC for the Pakistan Oval debacle and Abbas mind games going on in the Indian bats- However, as is well known, Ponting sanctuary of the outfield, where he cut a match referee. Moreover, the fun thing did not do the job a manager, in this par- man's head. often goes over the top. Remember the lonely, disconsolate figure. Egar's actions here is that Waqar Younis says there is ticular case, is required to do. Get on The point here is that last week, if Ashes series last year and the run out at spelled the end of another test bowler's nothing wrong with ball tampering with the game and sort out the other you remember, Ponting wanted some Nottingham, unable to accept that little career and the culmination of a contro- (being the expert on this particular art, problem later. Abbas, who in a first-class clarity about on-field communication episode. He loves throwing the verbals versy that had plagued the bowler since he should know). career scored 108 centuries, between captain and umpire. around, does our Ricky. that series against Peter May's England What is interesting though, is how the and the only Pakistan bats- It is obvious that he is This was so unlike Richie Benaud tourists for the 1957/58 Ashes series. Pakistan Cricket Board, under pressure man to reach that select list, unaware of the finer points of during the Ian Meckiff throwing episode May was very much in the Rahul from the country's sports council, is to mostly for Gloucestershire, the law. Players often are at Brisbane in 1963/64 during the South Dravid/Mahela Jayawardene mould; ele- explain what went wrong in England should have known better, allowed to get away with too African tour of Australia. gant, stylish and the first of England's and is enough support for the foreign unless he has an ego problem much in the spirit of the game Goddard's Cinderellas as they were great modern post World War II bats- coaches employed, have decided on plac- and removing him as manag- and the laws. Had the roles dubbed, were a harmonious team during men. He scored a century on his Test ing written submissions before er has eliminated, say con- been reversed, the Indians their tour. They were also called a cou- debut against South Africa in 1951. He Madugalle over the ball tampering issue. tacts, one of the problems in would have got on with the ple of less polite names during the visit, may have learnt a lot under Len It is an interesting twist in the story. the Pakistan camp. game without throwing but after that fine win in Adelaide the Hutton's captaincy, but he wasn't as good Inzamam, Bob Woolmer and Yet as the ball tampering tantrums a la Ponting, who Australian press was forced to acknowl- as the great Yorkshireman, brought up Shaharyar Khan will be meeting the Sri issue continues to create escaped being fined by match edge that they were a far stronger team on the wet surfaces of the northern Lankan at a venue still to be confirmed headlines, Australian captain referee Chris Broad. than many were prepared to admit with by the ICC. After all, Madugalle needs to county, he found enjoyment when the Ricky Ponting clearly does not Brad Haddin, the Adam Eddie Barlow and an emerging Graeme look at the case from all angles and the Trevor county moved south to play their games understand the laws of the Gilchrist replacement in this Pollock taking on the Australians at two players involved, Danish Kaneria Chesterfield and displayed superb technique. game. Either that or he is and Umar Gul, along with big mouth series as wicketkeeper, is not their own game. As it stood at the time, the law on quite happy to cheat his way o Zaheer Abbas will present their the sort who would walk or it seems Both teams went into the first Test throwing was decidedly different to victory. As a pre-Ashes gift someone thoughts on paper. There is a problem believes in the spirit of the laws either. with some apprehension over Meckiff's what it is now. Because of the Geoff should donate him a law book and here, as the players should be ques- His deliberate burgle of Harbhajan selection and action. However, judge- Griffin throwing debacle, Sir Donald underline the relevant passages. This tioned about their role in this disastrous Singh's wicket off the bowling off ment on his action was delayed until Bradman had much to do with the would be an interesting exercise, as with episode. Yet cost and logistic factors are Andrew Symonds was as big a set up job well into the second day, after Australia reframing of the law in 1960. There are being considered here. Inzamam, his knowledge of the laws is as you would see. Trevor Quirk, a name batted first. Umpire Col Egar, the those who suggest that he helped redraft Abbas has yet to explain to the PCB shaky. that finds its way into Wisden for one of Australian Cricket Board president in the law, accepted by the Marylebone who he was talking to for so long on his On Friday, through what was a bad those unusual dismissals of obstructing 1991-92, was in little doubt after passing Cricket Club laws committee at the time, mobile phone at the time of the event decision against Sachin Tendulkar in the field, was a wicketkeeper batsman the first delivery without comment. and designed to help Meckiff's action. In instead of playing an active role in try- the triangular tournament here, umpire for Northern Transvaal. He also applied 'No b-a-l-l!' came the call of the second the end, Meckiff didn't tour England in ing to start the game again. There was a Mark Benson, a former England county the Haddin trick close to lunch during ball from Egar at square leg. The crowd 1961 when it became known that Syd television shot at the time of The Oval player and Test cap quickly reversed his club games in the hope of getting a went numb and a sick silence swept over Buller, a tough no-nonsense England fiasco of Shaharyar Khan turning his decision when he realised the ball wicket, especially if nine wickets were them. Egar stood motionless. The Test umpire would call Meckiff as even back on Abbas while Bob Woolmer was bowled by Glenn McGrath had come off down. Australian fielders, uncertain, looked at the redrafting of the law had not cleared stuck in between trying to make sense. the batsman's shoulder and not the bat. He would prime the slips and orches- each other, unable to believe what was the action.