Popular Underculture $39.95 or double your pleasure – 2 for $69.95 5IF0OMZ1MBDFUP1MBZ1PLFS 5IF#FTU1MBDFUP4IPPU1PPM /PUKVTUBQPPMIBMMBOZNPSF 5FYBT)PMEA&N 1PLFS5PVSOBNFOU &WFSZ.POEBZQNQN NVTUSFHJTUFSPOMJOFBUXXXXPSM%UBWFSOQPLFSDPN /P#VZ*O'SFFUP1MBZ 3UMMER 8JO(SFBU1SJ[FT (SBOE1SJ[F8JOB1PLFS5BCMF 5BLFBEWBOUBHFPGPVSFWFSZEBZTQFDJBMT .POEBZ#VDLFUTPG#VE #VE-JUF #VE4FMFDU QBDLmQNUP$MPTF 5VFTEBZP[#VE#VE-JUFmQNBN 8FEOFTEBZ $0--&(&/*()5QNBNmTJOHMFTIPUXFMMESJOLT P[NVHEPNFTUJDESBVHIUT 5IVSTEBZ -"%*&4/*()5QNBNm"QQMFUJOJT #PUUMF%PNFTUJDT .JDIFMPC6MUSB 'SJEBZ %+/JHIUm"GUFS.JEOJHIUCVZBOZBQQFUJ[FSBOEHFUBGSFFEFTTFSU 4BUVSEBZ #BDBSEJ'MBWPSFE%SJOLTBGUFS.JEOJHIU 4VOEBZ '3&&100-QNBN 1-64 57T "XFTPNFGPPEPWFSNFOVJUFNT 1SPKFDUJPO4DSFFO57 0VUTJEF4FBUJOH )BMGQSJDFQPPM5VFTEBZTmUPNJEOJHIU (JBOUESJOLTQFDJBMT XJOHT.5IV QN &$BSTPO4USFFU BUUIF#JSNJOHIBN#SJEHF r XXXTIPPU[DBGFDPN The Sex Incident Happy fun times with proactive voyeurism Issue 16 June, 2005 FeatureS 30 Whore By Zelda Getz “So I arranged to meet Shabir, owner, CEO and product tester for Starr Escorts. I hopped a bus Downtown, and he picked me up in a sleek black sports car. The “interview” was in his On the Cover: Pam Coudriet shitty little storefront in the Strip District–three private rooms had curtains across the door, Make- up by Shana Lohr and a stereo that got turned up to drown out itinerant moans.” Illustration by Mat Poprocki Photography by Nate Bogos Love and Lust in the Age of Mechanical 32Introduction Or AdultfriendFinder and the Infinite Sadness By Jesse Hicks “AdultFriendFinder, then, is another fascinating beast in the strange menagerie that is the American dating scene. Through the wonders of technology, you can make new friends and bang them hardcore, with just a few clicks of your mouse. (Well, not the banging – not yet, anyway.) You can participate in message boards with like-minded swingers; the Pittsburgh board promises a failed orgy at least once a month, and you’ll thrill to multiple postings of “April 1 gangbang – who’s in?” followed by what seems to be, to the author’s ears anyway, the longest, saddest silence ever captured in text form. And of course there’re the explicit pictures, many with blurred out faces if that’s your thing.” Photographed by Ethan LongPhotographed Selena in the clutches of Hel Deek Magazine Popular Underculture DEPARTMENTS Letter from the editor: Publisher: Nova Keenan 9 Merton Krunk guest edits, fi nally realizes his inner elder anger Chief: Matt Stroud 11Letters to the editor: A bunch of stuff people who say they’ve read the magazine have sent to us. Nonsense Management: Nate Bogos The Introduction Minister Of Propaganda: Jesse Hicks 1314 Newsbriefs: President Bush Leaps Out of the Closet; Burstin’ with Ellen Burstyn; Time Travelin’ WV Man; Underrepresented Queef Fetish Design Overlords: Doug Crissman, Houston McIntyre 15 Drinking and Smoking / Intoxication: Playboy Cigars; Vox Vodka Masters Of Copy: Ben Edwards, Mo Mozuch 16 Punk / Counterpunk: Lying into Elementary Libido Fashion Maven: Elizabeth Marklewicz 18 Sport: Stealing Sex; “To the Sirens fi rst shalt thou come...” Business: Ha ha ha ha 20 Conspiracy: CIA Sex Slaves Artists Of Submission: Ethan Long, Casey Sommers, Dmitriy Babichenko, Matthew J. Poprocki Fashion: Positions, positions, positions. Writers Of Submission: Samuel Z. Hamilton, Alexander DeGravely, Emily Avent, John Thomas 21 Menesini, Ralph “Bucky” Gainsborough, Clinton Doggett, Cecelia Avresti, Jo Anne Heen, Joseph L. Flatley, Zelda Getz, Natty Soltesz, Emma Black, Greg Benevent, Salvador McWindbag, David Carter, Gallery: Aleister Loinshanks, Hester Exodus, Don Caligula, Niki Holler, Sam Lipsyte, Charles Edward Munster, Rebecca Corrigan, Mussolini Wonderbread, Eugene Furrows, Ricardo Octavian, Raymond Luxury-Yacht, 3940 Ethan Long – compelling, haunting, elegant, sophisticated, thought-provoking; Dainty Miscellany, Ajax Synecdoche, Rita Delgado, Tim Grierson, Stephan Raiser, Murtle Faceloaf, Dick Hurts, Rainier Corin, Gershom Onesiphorus, Sibyl Carmen, Michael Cyrus Pockwill, John 43 Casey Sommers –somthing like that stuff above. Daniels, Richard Cheetham, Dennis Scanland, Anna Battista, Marty Slagter, Frenk Perniskis, Paul H. Monkey, Neil Yodnane, Angela Fucari, Steve Fucari, Voodoo Ted, Shine Rangoon, Bones VanPeeblez, Joe Literature: Babinsack, Joel Claycomb, Jimmy Woodfox, Jason Salinetro, Aimee Forrest, Lydia Fucillo 48 Models: Pam Coudriet, Heather Lucas 46 You Could Never Hate Me as Much as I Hate Myself; Make-up: Shana Lohr 46 Love in the Time of Abstinence Thanks: Michael Grzymkowski, Aaron Borchert, Rachel Vallozzi Reviews Apologies: To William Lee, victim of the fi rst ever Drive-By Deeking 5354 Book Reviews: “Sex Manuals”; “Vivid Girls #1”; Madonna’s “Sex”; “The People of Paper”; “H.P. Lovecraft: Against the World, © Copyright 2005 DeekMagazine L.L.C. “Against Life”; “Home Land”; “Sex Before Six” Reproduction of Deek Magazine in any manner, in whole or in part, is prohibited without express, written consent of the publisher, who can be reached at [email protected]. Deek Magazine reserves the right to edit all materials for clarity and space, and 59 Music Reviews: Beck; Nine Inch Nails; Sage Francis; Dodging August; Animal Collective; Dalek; Gorillaz; John Digweed; assumes no responsibility for anything, especially our sanity. Some of Deek’s content is constructed as fi ction… you realize this, yes? Weezer; Queens of the Stone Age; M83; Kid Koala; Sensual Cobra; Jimmy Chamberlin Complex; Origin; Between Home and Serenity; Hi, my name is Eric and I run classifi ed ads seeking aspiring models wanting to develop their portfolio. Aided by my lovely girlfriend Fantomas; Kylesa; We’re Wolves; Moby (the photographer) and my sexy ‘assistant,’ we lure hopeful models into our studio for a ‘try-out’ photo session. What they DO NOT KNOW is that the plot is to have our willing assistant seduce our female guest into exploring the opportunity for...her fi rst lesbian SEX! 70 Movie Reviews: “Celebrity Sex Tapes”; John Holmes; “Crash”; “Quills”; “Salo,” or “The 120 Days of Sodom” Taking advantage of this exotic phenomenon, our team is always poised with the lenses focused and the fi nger on the record button, ready to take part in fi lming one of the sexiest events EVER! Come share their fi rst experience. Oh yes. Our hot slut Carly roped spicy 74 Video Game Reviews: “Mercenaries”; “NARC”; “God of War” Sativa into coming back to the house and out of her clothes. Our gal loosened Sativa lips up with a kiss...and her twat with her tongue and a fat dildo! Watch sexy Sativa go lesbo for the fi rst time ever! Kelly was up for a box lunch and Cassie had the hottest box in the park! This little athletic slut went lesbo after Kelly ate her snatch and gave a pussy full of strap on! Watch our little Kelly give Cassie her fi rst lesbian experience! Kelly found kindergarden teacher Goldie shopping and had a few things she wanted to teach her! She licked EventS Goldie’s tight snatch till she was good and wet and whipped out her dildo to give Goldie some lessons! Girl plus girl plus dong equals LEZBO! Paige was out for some hot schoolgirl action, and Faith was the star pupil! After some sweet talking, we got her back to the 76 classrom for a little lesbo 101! We had this little hottie naked and licking her fi rst pussy in no time! Faith loved having her fi rst lesbian sex! A+! Jazmine was up for getting tipsy and fi nding some lesbian cherry to pop! We took Michealanne back to the house and after some tequila she was licking her fi rst pussy in no time. This sexy little lesbian loved her fi rst lesbian sex! No other site has got as much Classifieds high quality horse sex movies as this site. And this site only features good looking girls fom Brazil, no ugly chicks here. As you can see these girls are craaaazy. 78 I want your needle dick forever! Advice Send correspondence to 7980 Ask the Apothecary DeekMagazine P.O. Box 7502 82 The Underappreciated Scholar: Jimmy Sells Dildos Pittsburgh, PA 15213 or [email protected] The Sex Incident Guest Editor: Merton Krunk Every editor and compiler, whatever the nature of the collection on ‘sex’ and ‘sexuality’ summed up, then eliminated.” which he works, inevitably consults his friends and associates. The [Ass] I pondered this for a moment. “Interesting.” Sex Incident1 is no exception. Initially, this volume was to be a more focused “Yes.” anthology of non-fi ctional short stories called Spread Those Cheeks dealing “How then,” I said, “do you expect that might happen?” with violent public displays of protosexuality in third world countries “Not sure,” he said. “It’s my wish. Which means it’s not my job to told from the perspective of doctors, transvestites and former women think logistics.” with unnaturally large breasts and orange hair. That project, after I had “Hm,” I said. worked on it for hours – a whole afternoon, really – ran slightly thin on “Yup,” he said. content. Why, you ask? Well, I discovered that copyright law on many such “Have you ever been with a man?” tales is very restrictive, since they all seem to be written by the same three “No.” people.2 Dismayed, I heard this news from my lawyer and considered a “I don’t believe you.” life of sadistic crime as an alternative. He strongly recommended against Suddenly, in a wonderful burst that I won’t soon forget, his eyes lit this. And though I hate him, I have never been one to go against the advice up, hit mine with a glimmer, and he sang these words: of someone so smitten with the law. So I gave in regretfully and began to think once more of a theme for an amalgam of topical literature. Each If you’d open up your eyes morning, as I sifted through hundreds and hundreds of fi nal manuscripts, You might fi nd surprise I would take a short time every half hour to check my personal electronic in knowing that you eyes mailbox, confer via telephone with trusted associates, discuss ideas with Are closed my dog, Brutus, and shout harassment at fellows walking past my window in the crisp sunshine of a new day.