i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page 1 — #1 i i i The Collected Poems of Erik Barry Erhardt 14 December 1974 — i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page 2 — #2 i i i i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page i — #3 i i i i For Shomari Vincent Deluccio, my brother, and Darrell Whitney Royter, my friend, for encouraging my self-discovery. “It’ll destroy you if you try to make it mean anything to anyone but yourself.” Henry Rollins (American Rock Singer, Author, Actor and Poet, b. 1961 Feb 13) i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page ii — #4 i i i i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page v — #5 i i i CONTENTS Memory Maze 1991 — 1997 High school and early College. Thoughts are Liquid in the Memory Maze 1991 — 1997 Laughter ....................................................................3 Period VI ...................................................................3 Period VI with Mr. G substituting Part I ............................................4 Period VI with Mr. G substituting Part II ............................................5 If .........................................................................6 My Only Fan .................................................................7 Our Flight ...................................................................8 One Funny Dream ...........................................................10 Groundless Perception ........................................................12 I Love The Way .............................................................13 Valediction .................................................................14 Phantasy ...................................................................15 Lights on, Lights off ..........................................................16 The Apple Tree ..............................................................18 Let This World Become Your Own ...............................................19 We are People ...............................................................20 I Know. ...................................................................21 Song of the Dandelion ........................................................22 A Simple Request ............................................................23 Shy Mellowness .............................................................25 Understanding ..............................................................25 Smiling ....................................................................26 Hello? ....................................................................27 It Is Wild ..................................................................28 Kneeling ...................................................................28 Sweet Beef .................................................................29 Eleven 28 ..................................................................30 Entropy ...................................................................31 i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page vi — #6 i i i vi Contents Are You OK?! ..............................................................32 Separate Beds ...............................................................34 My Friends .................................................................34 Nature’s Pull of Night .........................................................35 Day Dream .................................................................36 That’s the Main Thing .........................................................39 Tired Pendulum .............................................................40 Leaving Summer Behind .......................................................41 Withdrawn Wintergreen .......................................................42 Cynical Pen ................................................................43 Flanging Images .............................................................45 Silent Rebellion .............................................................45 Faint Overtones .............................................................46 Intermittent Mirage ...........................................................47 Going Home ................................................................48 The Audience Was Kind ......................................................49 Mother’s Day ...............................................................50 I’ve Moved On ..............................................................52 Real ......................................................................53 Selective memories ...........................................................55 If You Wait Till May ..........................................................55 A Dream With Ann ...........................................................59 We’re Right ................................................................60 Prose Illusions into Life ............................................................61 Food is an art ...............................................................62 Why ......................................................................62 Night Life ..................................................................62 From Fantasy — Reality .......................................................63 Mind Words A Point of View I do the things I do for many reason ..............................................72 What You’re Missing .........................................................73 Creative Junkyard Stupid Poetry 1996 — 1997 College: London and briefly thereafter. i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page vii — #7 i i i Contents vii Stupid Poetry Piss Puss ...................................................................81 Jelly Swan .................................................................81 Window White ..............................................................82 Distance ...................................................................82 Gravity Girl ................................................................82 Ballerina Girl ...............................................................83 1995 College: London 199507 — 199509 As I Lay Alone in London ......................................................87 1997 Finishing college. 199701 — 199703 Cancer ....................................................................91 Cinnamon bun ..............................................................93 The Journey ................................................................93 Sport without conscious .......................................................93 Song for Orion ..............................................................94 Lazy ......................................................................95 From within I am ............................................................96 Sonnet ....................................................................97 I’m crippled ................................................................98 Place .....................................................................99 Glow ....................................................................100 To Play ...................................................................102 Again by the bedside of a woman weeping ........................................103 She Dies ..................................................................104 Black Clock ...............................................................105 Plastic canister .............................................................105 Stepping ..................................................................106 Giggle ...................................................................108 199704 — 199706 Still wishing for stillness ......................................................109 Weaving Watersongs .........................................................110 Let me not go again into silence ................................................110 Baccalaureate Speech ........................................................110 i i i i i “ErikBarryErhardt˙poetry” — 2007/9/9 — 21:20 — page viii — #8 i i i viii Contents Movement ................................................................112 Three Ways ...............................................................113 Grass three inches long .......................................................114 As a child curious of my world .................................................114 On the Baccalaureate Service at the Cathedral of the Pines ............................115 The Car ..................................................................116 Skatepark .................................................................117 Naked Void ...............................................................118 (with music) ...............................................................121 Thin black lesion ...........................................................121 199707 — 199709 Water / Slowness ...........................................................122 bits ......................................................................123 I am a gentle person .........................................................124 If I became my emotions at this moment ..........................................125 How can I be feared? ........................................................126 Where does the stream of conscious lie ...........................................127 A tear forms