American Fairy Tales by Kelsey Celek adapted from the stories by L. Frank Baum
Cast of Characters COREY - Adult/teen to play a fifth grader. Intellectual and precise; he is trying very hard to behave the way he thinks adults do. Loves to read. Morgan brings out a silly side in him he doesn’t always like. Doubles as many other characters within the stories. MORGAN - Adult/teen to play a second grader who absolutely adores her older brother Corey. Excitable and imaginative; she’s totally a kid who dresses herself and may or may not eat paste. We all know a kid like Morgan. Doubles as many other characters within the stories. THE AUDIENCE - Throughout the play, the audience is pulled in to assume other roles in each story.
Note: Corey is written as a male character and Morgan is written as a female character. However, either role would be appropriate for actors of any gender. Cast the actors who are fit for each role; you are welcome to change pronouns as needed. However, roles they assume within each story (Martha, Luigi, etc.) should not change gender.
Setting Corey and Morgan’s performance space, present day.
The set should be able to transform to create the different settings in each of the stories. Each setting does not have to be literal - it’s probably better if the audience has to use their imaginations to see each new item. Think of how kids build forts out of their stuff. Everything transforms into something else.
However, the set should probably include some kind of wall for prop storage/changing space. You’ll also need a trunk with some kind of false back to facilitate “The Box of Robbers”. If you come up with a solution other than what is described in the script, go for it. I bow to the wisdom of your production teams.
Costumes should be minimal - pieces added and removed quickly as the story changes. Ideally, any costume piece worn by an audience member should be made of an easily-cleaned material.
SCENE ONE. Prologue/The Performance (The stage is set for COREY and MORGAN’s big performance. As the audience enters, COREY and MORGAN help them find their seats. COREY is acting as a very official usher. MORGAN is trying to emulate him, but her excitement is hard to contain. When the audience is about halfway full:)
COREY.
Morgan, I’m going to go get our stuff ready backstage. Can you keep helping the audience find their seats?
MORGAN. Yep!
COREY. Great. But remember, everything on stage is all ready for the show, so don’t. Touch. Anything.
MORGAN. Sure thing, Big Brother.
COREY. Cool. I’ll be right back. (He exits behind the wall. MORGAN instantly turns her attention to the items onstage. She tries to get as close as she can without touching them. Maybe she sniffs them. Finally, she gives in and grabs a prop. She starts a game of “This Is Not A”, in which she uses the prop as something else. [ex. A baseball bat becomes a fishing rod, a bowl becomes a hat, etc.] As time allows, she pulls volunteers from the audience to continue the game. When the audience is almost full:)
COREY. (offstage) Morgan! Are your costumes ready backstage? (MORGAN leaps into action, seating any audience volunteers and returning props to their homes.)
MORGAN. Um, I think so!
COREY. Do you want to come check?
MORGAN. Yep yep yep. I’m coming! (She finishes and starts to dart backstage just as COREY emerges. They high five in passing, then COREY goes into official mode, ushering in the latest audience members. When the audience is full and completely seated:)
COREY. Welcome, everyone. It’s about time to get started. My name is Corey, and I’m very glad to see you at this very special presentation. Today...we are going to do a play! Raise your hand if you’ve ever seen a play before. (Upon audience’s response:) Good, good. I’m glad to have so many experts here today. (Or: “Well, that’s okay, we’ll show you how it works.”)
Now, in today’s show you guys will have a very important job: the job of an audience member. It’s a tough job - you have to watch and listen to everything that happens in the story onstage. Show me how you think respectful audience members should sit. Show me how you think respectful audience members use their voices. Show me what respectful audience members do when the play is over. (Note: COREY should stop and ad lib as necessary until the audience shows appropriate audience behaviors.)
COREY. Great. It looks like you guys are going to be great at your job today. That means we can get started. (calling offstage) Morgan, are you ready?!
MORGAN. (off) Yep yep yep! (COREY takes center stage for his stiff and very rehearsed opening speech.)
COREY. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages, welcome to the play. My name is Corey, and I am in the fifth grade. I like to read books. (MORGAN bursts from backstage.)
MORGAN. You mean you LOVE to read books. It’s like, your favorite thing to do!
COREY. Shh, Morgan! It’s not your turn yet!
MORGAN. Sorry. (She returns backstage.)
COREY. I like to read books. So my teacher, Mrs. Englewood, said I could create a play to share my love of reading with younger students.
MORGAN. (offstage) Like me! Like me!
COREY. (sighing) Like my little sister, Morgan. (MORGAN bursts from backstage.)
MORGAN.
Hellooooo, everyone! My name is Morgan and I’m in second grade and Corey is my big brother and I am super mega totally excited to be helping him with his play today!
COREY. Do you have the book? (It dawns on her that she doesn’t.)
MORGAN. Sorry! (She darts backstage.)
COREY. Today Morgan and I will be performing our version of some classic stories by a very famous author. Can anyone here raise their hand to tell me what an author does? (He takes suggestions from the audience.)
COREY. You’re right; an author is a person who writes stories. And today, we’re going to share the story of - (MORGAN enters triumphantly holding a book over her head.)
MORGAN. American Fairy Tales by L. Frank BOOM!
COREY. Morgan, we’ve talked about this. The author’s name is L. Frank Baum.
MORGAN. Are you sure? Because it looks more like BOOM!
COREY. Baum.
MORGAN. Boom.
COREY. Baum.
MORGAN. ...Boom. (COREY gives up.)
COREY. Fine, just...everyone, he’s a really famous author, okay? He wrote The Wizard of Oz.
MORGAN. Really? That’s cool.
COREY. I know! Are you ready to get started now?
MORGAN. Yep yep yep. (She starts to leave.)
COREY. Good. (MORGAN stops suddenly.)
MORGAN. Except for one thing. Our stories are really fun and all, but I thought maybe we could add a part - (She pulls a few toys from her pockets and begins to act it out as she speaks.) Where I’m like wheeeeee and you’re like wow and then we’re both like yaaaaaaay -
COREY. Morgan! This is a very serious fifth grade project! Are you going to help like we practiced or not?!
MORGAN. Okay. Sorry. I just was excited to play with you.
COREY. Mrs. Englewood says that all stories have a structure, with a beginning, a middle, and and end. Which means right now we have to stick with what we practiced. Play time can be later, okay?
MORGAN. Okay!
COREY. Go put your costume on. It’s time for our first story. (MORGAN dashes to another part of the stage to put on her MARTHA costume [bow, pinafore, etc.])
SCENE TWO. The Box of Robbers (COREY opens the book and begins to read.)
COREY. “The Box of Robbers”. (reading) No one intended to leave Martha alone that afternoon, but it happened that everyone was called away, for one reason or another. Mother was attending her weekly card party, sister
Nell was out for a long drive, and Father was at the office, as usual, leaving Martha quite alone in the big house. (MORGAN, as MARTHA, dramatically flings herself onto the floor.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. I’m bored. Whatever shall I do alone in this big house?
COREY. (reading) Then she remembered that in the attic was a doll’s playhouse that hadn’t been used for months -
MORGAN. (jumping up) Let’s DO THIS! (COREY gives her a look.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. I mean… (back in character) What a pleasant idea. To the attic I go! (MORGAN/MARTHA frolics to another part of the stage. She moves the set pieces - including the trunk- to form the attic as COREY narrates.)
COREY. (reading) Martha climbed the winding stairs to the big room under the roof. It was well lit, warm, and pleasant. Around the walls were rows and boxes of trunks, piles of old carpeting, pieces of damaged furniture… (By now, MORGAN is done frolicking and would like very much to move on.)
MORGAN. Does this story have to be in an attic? What if it was like, on the Death Star - (She pulls toys from her pockets again to demonstrate.) And then we’ll be all like whaaat and Martha will be like “That’s no moon” and -
COREY. Morgan, Morgan. This story does have to be in an attic. Mrs. Englewood says that every story has it’s own setting, or where it takes place.
MORGAN. But attics aren’t as cool as Death Stars.
COREY. Maybe. But the setting of the story can change the way its characters act. Like, do you behave the same way in the library that you behave at a carnival?
MORGAN.
No way!
COREY. Exactly. So this character - Martha - would act differently in an attic.
MORGAN. Got it. So...what was the attic like again?
COREY. (reading) Every well-regulated house has an attic of this sort, so I need not describe it. (MORGAN nods in approval. At this point, she notices the trunk.)
COREY. (reading) In the corner, she noticed a wooden trunk. Her Uncle Walter had sent it over from Italy years and years ago - before Martha was born, in fact.
MORGAN/MARTHA. Mother told me about this trunk! She said that there is no key, because Uncle Walter wished it to remain unopened until he returned home. (A moment as she stares at the trunk.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. But…Uncle Walter has been gone for some time… (She glances around the attic.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. I don’t think he’ll mind if I… (She pounces on the trunk and tries to force it open. It is locked. She slumps against its side.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. It’s locked!
COREY. (reading) It was then she remembered the big basket of keys on the shelf in the linen closet.
MORGAN/MARTHA. Those keys are of all sorts and sizes! Perhaps one of them will unlock this mysterious trunk! (She grabs the basket of keys.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. Wow. That’s a lot of keys. I mean… (back in character)
I believe I will need some help so I can find the right key. Would anyone here like to try opening the trunk? (MORGAN starts taking volunteers to choose a key and unlock the trunk. The real one should be concealed so it is chosen last. The precise number of keys is flexible and will depend on how it times out alongside COREY’s costume change.
As this is happening, COREY discreetly hides behind the wall to put on his LUIGI costume. Ideally, this should include an over-the-top Mario Brothers style mustache. Hopefully this will be complete by the time MORGAN’s last volunteer unlocks the trunk. MORGAN triumphantly leads the audience in a round of applause as she seats her volunteers.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. Now I can see what Uncle Walter has been hiding all this time! (She lifts the lid, and as she does COREY pops out, dressed in robber costume as LUIGI.)
COREY/LUIGI. (boring, monotone) It’s a-me, Luigi! (MORGAN bursts into giggles.)
MORGAN. Corey! What are you doing? (COREY lifts his mustache and pulls the book out of the trunk.)
COREY. The book says this is what happens next! I’m trying to be a character - you know, someone new in the story.
MORGAN. Yeah, but the book says this character is a robber from Italy. You’re just acting like Corey in a mustache. Which is a little weird.
COREY. Well, I guess to be more like my character, I’m going to have to act a little differently. Like I’m really in the story.
MORGAN. I bet we can get some of our friends here to help you.
COREY. (to audience) Who would like to help with this part of the story? (COREY and MORGAN each pull volunteers from the audience. They quickly gather them behind the wall, where COREY lines them up and gives them each a robber costume piece. MORGAN resumes her position next to the trunk and opens the book.)
MORGAN. Let’s try this again.
(reading) The sight that met Martha’s eyes caused her to start back in amazement. Slowly and carefully a man unpacked himself from the trunk. (COREY/LUIGI pops out of the trunk.)
COREY/LUIGI. (in a cheesy Italian dialect) It’s a-me, Luigi! The greatest robber in all of Italy! (COREY helps his volunteers out of the trunk - and into line next to him - as MORGAN continues to read.)
MORGAN. And another robber emerged from the trunk, and another, and another (this line can be altered depending on how many volunteers you use) until there was a whole row of them across the attic floor. The robbers all yawned and stretched, (COREY leads them in doing this) relieved after many years inside the trunk. And the robbers all said to Luigi, “My! But you were heavy!”
ROBBERS. (perhaps with some help from MORGAN) My! But you were heavy!
COREY/LUIGI. It was unavoidable - the lid of the trunk pressed me down upon you. Yet I tender you my regrets. You must acknowledge I have been your nearest friend for years, so do not be disagreeable! (COREY/LUIGI laughs heartily at his own joke. The ROBBERS probably won’t.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. Excuse me. May I ask what you are doing in my attic?
COREY/LUIGI. Aha! Greetings, little girl. Bow to the nice little girl, robbers! (COREY/LUIGI demonstrates an elaborate bow for the ROBBERS to copy.)
COREY/LUIGI. Permit us to introduce ourselves. I am Luigi, the greatest robber in all of Italy! And these are my merry band of robbers - Beni, Victor, and Francisco! (You are welcome to change these to female names if desired. The list of names can continue to go with the number of volunteers you have.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. You’re robbers? Isn’t that awfully wicked?
COREY/LUIGI. And the robbers said, “We are extremely and tremendously wicked!”
ROBBERS. (maybe with help from COREY) We are extremely and tremendously wicked!
COREY/LUIGI. “You could not find robbers more wicked than we!”
ROBBERS. You could not find robbers more wicked than we!
MORGAN/MARTHA. That doesn’t sound very nice at all. In fact, it sounds like you robbers are downright naughty! (COREY/LUIGI gasps in horror.)
COREY. And all of the robbers hung their heads in shame. (He leads the robbers in doing so.)
MORGAN. And, overcome by emotion, the robbers all said, “Naughty!”
COREY/LUIGI and ROBBERS. Naughty!
MORGAN. They said, “That’s a hard word!”
COREY/LUIGI and ROBBERS. That’s a hard word!
COREY/LUIGI. I never thought we’d be so reviled!! Yet, perhaps you spoke thoughtlessly. You must consider, miss, that our naughtiness has an excuse. For how are we to be good robbers unless we are naughty? (MORGAN/MARTHA thinks.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. Well, you can’t remain robbers any longer, because you are now in America.
COREY. And all of the robbers put their hands to their faces - (He leads them in doing so.)
COREY. - and cried, “America!”
COREY/LUIGI and ROBBERS. America!
MORGAN/MARTHA. Certainly. My uncle Walter sent you here from Italy in this trunk. You are on Prairie Avenue in Chicago, Illinois.
COREY. And the robbers all cried, “NOOOOOOOOOO!”
COREY/LUIGI and ROBBERS. NOOOOOOOOOO!
COREY/LUIGI. Your uncle Walter has wronged us! What shall we do for a living?
MORGAN/MARTHA. Oh, don’t worry. There are lots of jobs you can do in Illinois. Why, you could be...chefs! Like this! (She does a brief pantomime as a chef.) Try it! (COREY and the ROBBERS repeat her pantomime.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. That’s great. (to the audience) Maybe we can show the robbers some of the other jobs people do in Illinois. When I say go, stay in your seats, but use your bodies to show what you would do if you were a firefighter. Ready, go! (MORGAN and the audience demonstrate acting like a firefighter. COREY and the ROBBERS join.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. Good! Let’s show them one more job to try. I’m looking for a volunteer with a raised hand who can tell me one more job we can try together. (MORGAN takes a suggestion from the audience, and they act it out together. The jobs section of this story can be altered depending on the temperament of your audience. If they’re diggin’ it, take more suggestions. If they’re not, skip the suggestions and move on. You are also welcome to change use of “chef” and “firefighter” to use an occupation that suits whatever your audience is learning about in class. Possible examples: author, illustrator, biologist, veterinarian.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. Thank you for helping, everyone. Give yourselves a round of applause. (to the ROBBERS) Did you find another job you might enjoy?
COREY/LUIGI.
No! We must not abandon our high calling. Robbers we have always been, and robbers we must remain!
MORGAN/MARTHA. Oh, dear; oh, dear! Why did Uncle Walter ever send you here in this trunk?
COREY/LUIGI. We must accept our fate and rob to the best of our ability! So long as we are faithful to our beloved profession we need not be ashamed.
MORGAN. And the robbers all cried, “We will begin now!”
COREY/LUIGI and the ROBBERS. We will begin now!
MORGAN. They said, “Let us rob the house we’re in!”
COREY/LUIGI and the ROBBERS. Let us rob the house we’re in! (COREY pushes MORGAN onto the lid of the trunk.)
COREY/LUIGI. Remain here! If you stir one step your blood will be on your own head! (gentler) Don’t be afraid; that’s the way all robbers talk to their captives. But of course we wouldn’t hurt a young lady under any circumstances. (as COREY) And all of the robbers said, “Of course not!”
ROBBERS. Of course not!
COREY/LUIGI. Follow me, robbers! Let us seek our plunder! Walk like this - (COREY leads the ROBBERS in a goofy sneaky walk around the space. Each time they pass a box, COREY pulls out a prop. They ooh and ahh over it, then COREY assigns a ROBBER to carry it. These props could include bric-a-brac such as: dresses, a candelabra, a clock, or a pie. The exact number of items can change as time allows. Eventually they will circle back to the trunk where they left MORGAN.
As this is happening, MORGAN leaves her place on the trunk, and discreetly assigns an audience member the role of the doorbell. The doorbell should be created by a hand prop - bell, buzzer, etc. - whatever you have that can make that sound effect. Be sure to tell this volunteer your cue for ringing it! Hopefully she’ll make it back to the trunk before the ROBBERS return.
As the ROBBERS return, COREY instructs them to sit on the floor in front of the trunk.)
COREY. And as the robbers returned with their plunder, they all cried, “Oh, joy!”
ROBBERS. Oh, joy!
COREY. “Oh, ecstasy!”
ROBBERS. Oh, ecstasy!
COREY. “It is a pleasure to rob once more!”
ROBBERS. It is a pleasure to rob once more!
MORGAN. Martha was miserable and did not know what to do about the robbers in the attic. Suddenly, the doorbell rang. (The audience member rings the doorbell.)
MORGAN. Martha ran to the window and saw it was only a postal worker, who had dropped a letter in the box and gone away again. But that gave her an idea of how to get rid of her troublesome robbers. (as MARTHA) It’s...it’s the police!
COREY. And the robbers began to shiver in fear! (COREY leads them in doing so.)
COREY/LUIGI. What?! Are there many of them?
MORGAN/MARTHA. Um...yes! Why, I’d say there are about….[number in audience] of them! (COREY leads the ROBBERS in shuddering.)
COREY/LUIGI. Do they seem strong?
MORGAN/MARTHA. Oh, yes. Why, they’re wearing bold [color nearby audience member is wearing] uniforms!
(COREY and the ROBBERS shudder.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. And they have fearsome police dogs with [color nearby audience member is wearing] fur! (COREY and the ROBBERS shudder.)
MORGAN/MARTHA. I think they’re going to break down the door! They will be here any second!
COREY/LUIGI. Dear lady, you must not let them find us!
MORGAN/MARTHA. I will save you.
COREY. And the robbers all said, “How?”
ROBBERS. How?
MORGAN/MARTHA. Get back into the trunk. Then they won’t be able to find you!
COREY/LUIGI. Dear lady, thank you for your kindness!
MORGAN/MARTHA. (with a wink to the audience) I wish only to return the kindness you've shown me. Now, hurry! They will soon be here to arrest you!
COREY/LUIGI. Come, robbers! We must do as she says! (COREY and MORGAN lead the ROBBERS to the trunk. MORGAN opens it and helps COREY inside first. MORGAN helps the other robbers in one at a time. They are received by COREY, who instructs them to sit behind the wall. When they are all inside, MORGAN closes the lid and sits on top.)
MORGAN. Then Martha sat upon the lid and pressed it with all her might. To her great delight, she heard the lock click, trapping the robbers inside. (breaking character, she giggles) That story is awesome! Let’s give a big round of applause to everyone who helped! (COREY emerges from behind the wall and guides the ROBBERS back to their seats. MORGAN collects the doorbell from the audience member. When everyone is seated, COREY hands MORGAN the book.)
COREY. Morgan, did you notice the moral of the story?
MORGAN. (reading) This story should teach us not to interfere in matters that do not concern us. For had Martha refrained from opening Uncle Walter’s mysterious trunk she would not have had to carry downstairs all the plunder the robbers had brought into the attic. (She looks over the book at the mess of props left on the floor.)
MORGAN. Uh-oh.
COREY. The book says it’s your job to pick these up.
MORGAN. Oh yeah? Well, Martha didn’t have friends there to help her. (to audience) Would anybody like to help me clean up? (MORGAN takes a few volunteers from the audience to help her quickly put the props away. When they are done, she leads the audience in a round of applause, then returns them to their seats.)
COREY. That’s cheating.
MORGAN. Nuh-uh. (COREY sighs.)
MORGAN. That was fun. Is it time for the next story now?
COREY. Yeah. But this time you’re going to stick to the story we practiced, right?
MORGAN. (reluctantly) Right.
SCENE THREE. THE GLASS DOGS (COREY flips the pages of the book.)
COREY. Good. It’s time for “The Glass Dogs.”
MORGAN. Ooo! Yes yes yes yes yes. Will we need friends to help us with this one?
COREY. (reading the book) Well, I’m the glassmaker.
MORGAN. And I’m the wealthy Miss Mydas.
COREY. And we’re going to need some wizards. Would anyone like to be a wizard in this story? (COREY hands the book to MORGAN as he takes a few volunteers to be WIZARDS and hands them a costume piece. Ideally, the WIZARDS should already be seated next to each other in the audience. Meanwhile, MORGAN takes a volunteer to make the doorbell sound effect again.)
MORGAN. (when everyone is set) Okay. I think we’re ready. (reading the book) “The Glass Dogs”. (COREY cues the WIZARDS to stand up.)
MORGAN. (reading) Some accomplished wizards once lived on the the top floor of an apartment building and passed their time in thoughtful study and studious thought. (COREY cues the WIZARDS into a “thinking” pose. Then he goes into the audience to get a new volunteer to be a NEIGHBOR.)
MORGAN. They would have been completely happy but for the numerous interruptions to their studies caused by folk who came to consult them about their troubles. Just when they were most deeply interested in their books or their bubbling cauldrons, the doorbell would ring - (The audience member rings the doorbell.)
MORGAN. - and a needy neighbor would plead, “Oh, great and powerful wizards, please help me!”
COREY and FIRST NEIGHBOR. Oh, great and powerful wizards, please help me!
MORGAN. And the wizards would stroke their wise and wizardly chins and say, “NO!”
WIZARDS.
NO! (COREY seats the NEIGHBOR and gets another volunteer to be a second one.)
MORGAN. But just as the wizards were getting back to their studious thought and their books and their bubbling cauldrons, the doorbell would ring - (The audience member rings the doorbell.)
MORGAN. - and another needy neighbor would plead, “Oh, great and powerful wizards, please help me!”
COREY and SECOND NEIGHBOR. Oh, great and powerful wizards, please help me!
MORGAN. And the wizards would stroke their wise and wizardly chins and say, “NO!”
WIZARDS. NO! (COREY seats the audience member.)
MORGAN. And this would go on and on all day until the wizards had lost their trains of thought and were unable to get any magical work done. It was very frustrating. They needed a way to keep their neighbors from coming to their door. One day, the wizards said to each other, “We should get a dog!”
WIZARDS. We should get a dog!
MORGAN. But then they looked at each other and said, “Where do we find a dog?”
WIZARDS. Where do we find a dog? (If desired, MORGAN is welcome to ad lib at this point...variations of “I don’t know, man, I thought you knew!”.)
MORGAN. So they decided to visit their next door neighbor, the poor glassmaker. (COREY jumps up and puts on his GLASSMAKER costume.)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Why, hello there, Wizards. What can I do for you today?
MORGAN. And the wizards all said, “Where can we find a dog?”
WIZARDS. Where can we find a dog?
COREY/GLASSMAKER. What sort of dog?
MORGAN. And the first wizard said, “One that will bark at people!”
FIRST WIZARD. One that will bark at people!
MORGAN. And the second wizard said, “One that won’t expect to be fed!”
SECOND WIZARD. One that won’t expect to be fed!”
MORGAN. And the third wizard said, “One that has no fleas!”
THIRD WIZARD. “One that has no fleas!”
MORGAN. And all the wizards said, “A good dog!”
WIZARDS. “A good dog!”
COREY/GLASSMAKER.. Such a dog is hard to find. I could make you each a dog out of glass, but they would not bark, you know.
MORGAN. And the wizards said, “Leave that to us!”
WIZARDS. Leave that to us!
MORGAN. “If we could not make a glass dog bark -”
WIZARDS. If we could not make a glass dog bark -
MORGAN.
“ - we would not be very good wizards!”
WIZARDS. We would not be very good wizards!
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Very well; if you can use glass dogs I’ll be pleased to make some for you. Only, you must pay me for my work.
MORGAN. But the wizards had never cared for money, so they didn’t have any to pay the glassmaker. (to the WIZARDS) Well, that’s awkward. Check your pockets, guys. Nothing? (They give the WIZARDS a moment to check, then:)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. I’ll make you a bargain, Wizards. I’ve had a bad head cold for some time. I’ll make your glass dogs if you make me a magic potion that will cure my illness.
MORGAN. And the wizards all said, “Deal!”
WIZARDS. Deal!
MORGAN. And so the glassmaker created glass dogs for the wizards.
COREY. Would anyone like to be a dog? I am looking for friends who are sitting in their seats, with their voices off, and who can show me their best dog poses! (MORGAN and COREY select volunteers from the audience and prep them in a dog costume piece. As this happens, MORGAN hands a bottle to one of the WIZARDS.)
MORGAN. And so the glassmaker created a glass dog for each wizard. The wizards were very thankful, and as promised, they gave the glassmaker a potion that could cure any illness. (COREY/GLASSMAKER takes the bottle.)
MORGAN. And the wizards said, “Guard this potion well.”
WIZARDS. Guard this potion well.
MORGAN. They said, “This is the only potion of its kind.”
WIZARDS. This is the only potion of its kind.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Thank you, Wizards. (COREY/GLASSMAKER leaves for another part of the stage.)
MORGAN. Then the wizards cast a wizzy spell and mumbled several very learned words in the wizardese language over their glass dogs. The wizards said, “Abra Cadabra!”
WIZARDS. Abra Cadabra!
MORGAN. “Alla Kazoo!”
WIZARDS. Alla Kazoo!
MORGAN. “Bibbity Boppity Boo!” (Or, depending on the age of your wizards, “Expecto Patronum!”)
WIZARDS. Bibbity Boppity Boo!
MORGAN. Thank you, Wizards. Everyone give the wizards a round of applause! (During the applause, MORGAN seats them. COREY might have to assist. For the time being, they can hang onto their costume pieces.)
MORGAN. After the wizards had cast their spell, the little glass dogs began to wag their tails from side to side. (The DOGS do this. COREY might be needed for some side coaching.)
MORGAN. They winked their left eyes - (The DOGS do.)
MORGAN. And they gave three loud barks!
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK!
MORGAN.
And all day, whenever a needy neighbor would come and ring the doorbell - (Audience member rings the bell.)
MORGAN. The dogs would scare them off by giving three loud barks.
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK!
MORGAN. Upon returning to his room, the glassmaker decided not to use the potion the wizards had given him.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. My head cold is better today. I will save my potion for a time when I am very ill. (He puts it in his pocket and starts to leave.)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. I wonder if magical potion can spoil. I had better ask the wizards. (He approaches the DOGS.)
MORGAN. But when he got to the wizards’ door, their glass dogs let out three loud barks -
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK!
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Excuse me, Glass Dogs, I’m just trying to see the wizards -
MORGAN. But the dogs let out three loud barks!
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK! (COREY/GLASSMAKER looks for a way around the dogs.)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Well...ah...I guess I’ll try later. (MORGAN cues the DOGS to sit in their places onstage as COREY/GLASSMAKER gets out a newspaper at a different part of the stage.)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. The next morning, as he read his newspaper, the glassmaker noticed an article stating that Miss Mydas, the richest young lady in town, was very ill, and the doctors had given up hope of her recovery. (as GLASSMAKER)
Hmmm...suddenly I have a plan to make a great deal of money, so I won’t have to be a poor glassmaker anymore! I must go and visit Miss Mydas!
MORGAN. And so the glassmaker travelled to the home of Miss Mydas. Her home was filled with family and friends who were mourning her illness. (Under the following, MORGAN puts on her MISS MYDAS costume and sets up her bed/blankets.)
COREY. (to the audience) Can you guys be the family and friends for this part? Okay, mourning means we’re really sad that Miss Mydas is sick. So when I say go, you’re going to make your best sad faces for three seconds. Ready? Go! (If necessary to facilitate MORGAN’s change, COREY can repeat adding sad sounds.)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Good! Thanks for helping! So then the glassmaker went to see Miss Mydas in her room. (as GLASSMAKER) Miss Mydas?
MORGAN/MYDAS. (coughing) Yeeees?
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Is it true that you are very very ill?
MORGAN/MYDAS. (coughing) Yeeees.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Is it also true that you are the richest woman in town?
MORGAN/MYDAS. (coughing) Yeeees!
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Well, I may appear to be but a poor glassmaker, but - (getting out bottle from his pocket) - I have a magical potion that will cure your illness!
MORGAN/MYDAS. (coughing) Yeeees? (She reaches for the bottle, but he pulls it back.)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. But - seeing as how this is the only magical potion of its kind - if I give it to you, you must agree to let me be your business partner and give me half of your fortune! (A moment as she mulls it over. More coughing and wheezing.)
MORGAN/MYDAS. Yeees! (She grabs the potion and gulps it down. Suddenly, she springs from her bed in a burst of energy and begins to dance around the room.)
MORGAN/MYDAS. Woohoo! I feel fantastic! And just in time for the Fritters’ party tonight. I’ll just cancel my funeral flowers, and then I’m off! (As she starts to go -)
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Um, Miss Mydas! Aren’t you forgetting something?
MORGAN/MYDAS. (freezing suddenly) What’s that?
COREY/GLASSMAKER. You promised I’d be your business partner! And that you’d give me half of your fortune!
MORGAN/MYDAS. Ah. Right. Well...we must have time to draw up the proper paperwork. Come by tomorrow and we’ll talk it over.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Very well, then. I’ll see you tomorrow! (COREY/GLASSMAKER exits behind the wall.)
MORGAN. The glassmaker had not impressed Miss Mydas very much as a business partner, and besides, she did not want to miss the Fritter’s party! When the glassmaker got home, the first thing he did was destroy all of his glass-making tools and throw them out the window. (There’s a lot of crashing and noise as we hear COREY/GLASSMAKER doing these things.) Then he sat down to figure out how to spend Miss Mydas’s money.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. (re-entering) I’ll buy diamonds and rubies and a fancy house… (to an audience member) What would you buy? (He takes a suggestion or two from the audience.) Excellent ideas. Once Miss Mydas makes me her business partner, I’ll have them all!
(He laughs and crosses back to where MORGAN is waiting for him.)
MORGAN. The following day he called upon Miss Mydas, who was reading a novel and eating chocolate creams as happily as if she had never been ill in her life. (as MISS MYDAS) Where did you get the magical potion that cured me?
COREY/GLASSMAKER. From some learned wizards. They gave it to me as payment for making glass dogs that bark and keep everyone from bothering them!
MORGAN/MYDAS. How delightful! I’ve always wanted glass dogs that can bark! You must buy them for me.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. But the wizards don’t care about money!
MORGAN/MYDAS. Then you must steal them for me. I could never take on a new business partner unless I have glass dogs that can bark!
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Uh...I’ll see what I can do… (He goes to get the leash as MORGAN cues the DOGS to stand.)
MORGAN. And on his way home, the glassmaker bought a very sturdy leash. When he arrived at the wizards’ door, their glass dogs gave three loud barks.
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK!
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Ugh. Come on, Glass Dogs, let’s go. (He hands each of them a section of the leash and leads them across the stage.)
COREY. And so the glassmaker put the glass dogs on the leash and led them to Miss Mydas’s door. The next day, he went to visit Miss Mydas again, sure he would be thanked for stealing the dogs she so greatly desired. But when he arrived at her door, the glass dogs gave three loud barks!
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK!
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Uh...Miss Mydas! Miss Mydas? Are you home? Call off your dogs!
MORGAN. But the glass dogs had been ordered that whenever someone came to Miss Mydas’s door, they were to give three loud barks.
DOGS. BARK! BARK! BARK! (MORGAN cues the DOGS to sit as COREY crosses to a different part of the stage.)
COREY. Unable to get past the glass dogs, the glassmaker went home and called Miss Mydas instead. (COREY and MORGAN both pick up phones.)
MORGAN/MYDAS. Hello?
COREY/GLASSMAKER. Why have you treated me so cruelly and set your glass dogs on me?
MORGAN/MYDAS. Well, to tell the truth, I don’t like the look of you. You don’t seem smart enough to take half my fortune.
COREY/GLASSMAKER. But you promised!
MORGAN/MYDAS. If you were smarter I’d keep my promise, but under the circumstances you are no fit partner for me. Unless you keep away from my mansion, I shall set my glass dogs on you! (MORGAN hangs up and goes to gather the WIZARDS. As she does, she hands one of the WIZARDS a new bottle. COREY/GLASSMAKER is devastated.)
COREY. The miserable glassmaker sat at home with a heart bursting with disappointment. (dramatic sigh) Well, thanks to everyone who helped tell this story. Let’s give them a round of -
MORGAN. Wait a second. Does it really have to be over?
COREY. Morgan, we’ve been over this. We have to stick to the story that we practiced. This is what happens in the book!
MORGAN. I know, I know, but, BUT - you said that all stories have a beginning, a middle, and an end, right?
COREY. Right.
MORGAN. Well, no offense to Mr. Boom, but that ending is SO. SAD. Can’t we do something to fix it? Sometimes when we make a play, the story changes a little. That’s called an adaptation, right Big Brother?
COREY. Well, yeah, adaptations can happen. But Morgan, just because you don’t like the ending doesn’t mean it’s a bad one. Good stories have conflict, or a problem, that happens during them. And the story can end when the problem is resolved - for better or for worse.
MORGAN. Ugh. That sounds like something Mrs. Englewood would say.
COREY. It was! (to the audience) Thank you to everyone who helped tell the story of The Glass Dogs. Let’s give them a round of applause! (During the applause, MORGAN and COREY collect the costume pieces and send their volunteers back to their seats.)
MORGAN. Well, you know...we could try to tell another story.
COREY. But we haven’t practiced another one!
MORGAN. I know, but you can help us find the structure, and I’ll help make the rest!
COREY. Well, maybe… (opening the book) We’re going to need a lot of characters.
MORGAN. (looking over his shoulder) Well, I’ll play this character...and you play this character…
COREY. And our friends can do the rest!
(to the audience) You guys will help, right?
MORGAN. Yep yep yep! Got it. Let’s try.
COREY. Okay! Let’s see what happens! (MORGAN runs off to find a costume as COREY starts to read.)
SCENE FOUR. The Enchanted Types
COREY. (reading) “The Enchanted Types. One time a knook named Popopo became tired of his beautiful life -” (MORGAN enters, in an attempt to start the story, but immediately gets stuck.)
MORGAN. Um, Corey? What’s a knook?
COREY. Oh, it’s a made-up creature with magical powers, kind of like an elf or a sprite.
MORGAN. Got it. Let’s try again. (She circles back as COREY starts over.)
COREY. (reading) “One time a knook named Popopo became tired of his beautiful life and longed for something new to do.”
MORGAN/POPOPO. You know, I have heard of earth people who live in cities. I should like to visit them and see how they live. That would surely be a fine amusement!
COREY. And so Popopo set out for the city where the earth people lived. But Popopo had never visited a city before, and he was shocked by the town’s roaring noise. (MORGAN makes a shocked pose, but is underwhelmed by the silence.)
MORGAN. I don’t think that sounds very shocking. (to the audience) I’m going to need your help to show this story’s setting. Can you guys help us make the sounds of the city?
(indicating part of the audience) This half is going to help me first. When I say go, you’re going to make your best car sounds for three seconds. Ready? Go! (After car sounds:)
COREY. (indicating the other half of the audience) And this half is going to help make construction sounds. Think of what it would sound like if we were building lots of big things with tools. When I say go, let me hear your best construction sounds for three seconds. Ready? Go! (After construction sounds:)
MORGAN. These sound great! (Note: If you’re really daring, you could substitute these city sounds for suggestions from the audience instead.)
COREY. Okay, this time we’re going to use those sounds in the scene. When I say “roaring noise”, we’re all going to make our city sounds for three seconds. Ready? (reading) But Popopo had never visited a city before, and he was shocked by the town’s roaring noise. (MORGAN reacts, horrified, as the audience supplies city sounds.)
COREY. Great job, guys! Thanks for helping!
MORGAN/POPOPO. My goodness! I had not counted on cities being so lively! I shall wait to explore until nighttime, when all the earth people are asleep!
COREY. And so that night, Popopo started exploring the city. He peered through the window of a hat shop, where he saw a great number of women’s hats.
MORGAN/POPOPO. (looking around) These hats all have wide brims, and many feathers, and...birds sitting on them!
COREY. Of course they did, for this was the fashion of the time. But Popopo had never seen such hats before, so he did not know that the birds were not real, but were in fact stuffed.
MORGAN/POPOPO. Knooks are guardians of birds, and love them dearly. To see so many of my little friends shut in a hat shop annoys and grieves me!
COREY.
And so, using his magical knook powers, Popopo brought all of the stuffed birds to life. (to half the audience) This section of the audience, can you be the birds? Let me hear your best bird sounds. (The audience chirps and tweets accordingly.) Good!
MORGAN/POPOPO. (to the birds) Poor dears! You must long to be in the fields and forests again!
COREY. And with a wave of his hand, Popopo opened the hat shop window.
MORGAN/POPOPO. Off with you! Fly away, my beauties, and be happy again! (as MORGAN) Okay, birds, staying in your seats, show me how you would use your bodies to fly! (After they do:) Great! Thanks for helping!
COREY. The astonished birds obeyed, and when they had soared away into the night air the knook closed the window and continued his wandering through the streets. (COREY slips away to put on his MILLINER costume.)
MORGAN. The next night, when Popopo returned to the hat shop, he noticed a light on within. He found the milliner inside -
COREY. A milliner is a person who makes hats!
MORGAN. He found the milliner inside - weeping and sobbing bitterly.
COREY/MILLINER. (weeping and sobbing bitterly) Alas! My pretty birds have been stolen! No one will buy my hats partly trimmed, for the fashion is to wear birds upon them. And if I cannot sell my goods I shall be utterly ruined!
MORGAN/POPOPO. Oh, no! In my love for the birds, I have accidentally wronged one of the earth people and made her unhappy. I want, in some way, to replace the birds upon the hats so the poor milliner might be happy again.
COREY. So he searched until he came upon a nearby cellar full of little gray mice.
MORGAN/POPOPO. Here are just the creatures to place upon the hats! (as MORGAN) Okay, this section of the audience is going to be the mice. Can I hear your best mouse sounds? Staying in your seats, can you show me how you’d use your body as a mouse? Great!
COREY. So Popopo exercised a charm that drew all the mice from the cellar and placed them on the hats in the hat shop.
MORGAN/POPOPO. Okay, mice, when I say go you’re going to freeze like you’re sitting on a lovely hat. Ready? Go! Excellent! Stay right there! I am so pleased with my work, I think I’ll remain in the hat shop and witness the delight of the milliner when he sees how I have trimmed the hats!
COREY/MILLINER. And so Popopo waited until the morning. (COREY acts out the following as the MILLINER while MORGAN/POPOPO waits impatiently.) When the milliner arrived, he swept the shop, and dusted the shelves, and washed the windows, and checked the mailbox...
MORGAN/POPOPO. Would you look at the hats already?!
COREY/MILLINER. Oh! (He scampers over to where the MICE are posed in the audience. Upon seeing them, he begins to shriek.)
COREY/MILLINER. Ew! Ew! Mice! There are mice! Ew! (COREY/MILLINER runs behind the wall, continuing to yelp.)
MORGAN/POPOPO. I now realize that mice are especially disagreeable to human beings, and that I have made a grave mistake in placing them upon the hats. I no longer need to charm these mice. (to the MICE) When I say go, you can unfreeze and make your mice sounds again. Go! (As the MICE unfreeze, COREY/MILLINER reappears. Upon seeing the MICE, he exits again shrieking.)
MORGAN/POPOPO. Thank you, mice. You can rest now. I cannot help but feel responsible for the milliner’s unhappiness. I need to seek advice from the King of the Knooks! (With great fanfare, COREY enters as KING OF THE KNOOKS.)
COREY/KING.
Well, Popopo, you’ve really done it this time. This should teach you not to interfere with the earth people! Since you have caused all this trouble, it is your duty to remedy it.
MORGAN/POPOPO. I know, oh King of the Knooks. How shall I do it? It is the fashion for women to wear birds upon their hats. So the milliner’s wares are worthless without the birds upon them!
COREY/KING. (deep in thought) Since you have changed the birds, you must also change the fashions, so it will no longer be stylish for women to wear birds upon their hats.
MORGAN/POPOPO. How do I do that?
COREY/KING. Easily enough. Fashions often change among the earth people, who tire quickly of any one thing. When they read in their magazines that the style is so-and-so, they never question it. So you must visit the magazines and enchant the types.
MORGAN/POPOPO. Enchant the types! (as MORGAN) Okay, so here’s how this worked. A long time ago, before there were computers and printers, when people wanted magazines or newspapers they used types.
COREY. Types were letters and symbols made out of metal. To print something, you had to line up the letters in the right order to spell out your words.
MORGAN. Then you’d spread ink over it -
COREY. - and press down the paper on top -
MORGAN. And that’s how you’d print your magazine! It took a long time - it’s a good thing we don’t print that way any more!
COREY. So when Popopo went to visit the magazine offices, he found the types already set and ready to print. Can some of our friends come up to help show the types? (MORGAN and COREY take ten volunteers and line them up across the stage. Each volunteer receives a sign intended to look like a printing press type. They form the sentence “Go out in fashion with a bird on your hat!”)
MORGAN/POPOPO.
(reading) “Go out in fashion with a bird on your hat!” That’s going to be the headline in this magazine. I need to rearrange these words to make it seem like birds are out of fashion. I think I can do it by moving only one word. Does anyone see which word I should move? (MORGAN starts to take suggestions from the audience. Whatever the volunteer guesses, have that person get up and move the word. Then together, see if that changes the meaning of the sentence. The sentence still has to make sense grammatically. Ideally, someone will suggest moving the word “out” so the sentence becomes “Go in fashion without a bird on your hat!”.)
MORGAN/POPOPO. I think that should be enough to change the fashion! Let’s give a round of applause to everyone who helped enchant the types. (During the applause, MORGAN collects the type props and seats the volunteers. COREY enters as the MILLINER, reading a newspaper.)
MORGAN/POPOPO. And so, after Popopo enchanted the types, the magazines were printed with his message about the changing fashions.
COREY/MILLINER. Oh, my! “Go in fashion without a bird on your hat!” My business is saved!
MORGAN/POPOPO. Once all the milliners in town read about the latest fashions, they threw away their old stuffed birds. Popopo found much enjoyment in visiting every hat shop and bringing all of the stuffed birds to life.
COREY. I have an idea for this part! What if the birds celebrate getting to fly away?
MORGAN. That’s a great idea! Let’s try it!
COREY. (to the audience) We’re going to need everyone’s help. Let’s all stand up. Without touching our neighbors, let’s try to move like birds.
MORGAN. I know! Everyone try to move like this! (She demonstrates a bird movement, which everyone copies.)
COREY. That looks great. Would one of our friends like to show everyone how a bird might dance? (They select a volunteer to demonstrate bird dance moves. If possible, they play celebratory music while this happens. Continue with more volunteers for an amount of time that feels appropriate.)
COREY. What a great story! Let’s give a round of applause to everyone who helped. (During the applause, MORGAN and COREY take off their costume pieces.)
SCENE FIVE. Epilogue
MORGAN. That was a lot of fun, Big Brother.
COREY. I think so, too. Thanks for helping me, Morgan.
MORGAN. Will Mrs. Englewood think this was a very serious fifth grade project?
COREY. I don’t know. But she’ll think we told some good stories. (to the audience) Thank you, everyone, for helping us today.
MORGAN. Yeah, you were like super mega cool and we liked getting to play with you guys. We’re definitely going to need your help next time.
COREY. (to MORGAN) About next time...I was thinking… (He produces toys from his pockets to demonstrate.) We could do a story where you’re all like arrrrrrrgh and I’m like hey and then we both go “say what now?” (He stops. MORGAN, for once, is stunned into silence.)
MORGAN. That. Is. AWESOME. I can’t wait!
COREY. Cool. (to the audience) We’ll see you next time, then! Thanks, everybody!
MORGAN. Bye! (They exit, plotting their next story with their toys. End of Play.)