Be a Good Role Model Kids Love “Slime”

May 2021 Vol. 37. No. 5

Social Skills

Be a good role model How can parents teach their chil- Children love honesty. Living dren to be responsible for their own truthfully and acting truthfully are actions? One way is by being good powerful examples. If you want your Art role models themselves. children to be able to admit mistakes, show them how to do it. • Be predictable. Children need to know the rules. In a world full of • Be dependable. As children contradictions and change, a parent grow, they need less from their parents Kids love “slime” should be predictable. and more from themselves, but one need they will always have is depend- If a child makes a mistake, he What is “slime” for? Any kid can able parents tell you it’s to play with. needs to know what to expect. Parents’ positions should be clear. A few simple They need to know they can Of course, most parents think rules, firmly enforced, are more effec- count on their parents to be on their slime is gross, and that’s probably tive than many rules loosely enforced. side; to show love and concern when the truth! things don’t go right; to forgive them • Be respectful. No one likes to for mistakes they make; to bake their But kids love to mess around be ridiculed or embarrassed. Within favorite cookies with it and sometimes play like they’re the heart of every child is the potential “sculpting.” for greatness. Don’t squelch it. Parents are the roots of a child’s changing world. Here’s how to make your own It is just as easy to take a child slime: aside and point out an error as it is • Be an example. Avoid hypoc- Start with some water in a bowl to make fun of him for a mistake in risy. If you tell a child not to smoke or plastic container. Slowly add corn- front of his friends. or use drugs but you smoke and use starch, mixing it with your hand. drugs, what behavior can you expect? • Respect the opinions of Add enough cornstarch so that the children and recognize their intel- With children, one living example slime looks wet when you’re pouring ligence. When making plans involv- is worth 10,000 empty words. Children it, but feels dry when it is touched. ing them, ask for their views and give mirror their parents. See them and you o Children can do the mixing with consideration to their preferences, see yourself. some supervision. when possible. Color can also be added. The Treat children as though they are best way is to add powdered tempera important because they really are. to the cornstarch before mixing. Or • When you’re wrong, say so. you can add food color to the water Just because children are smaller before mixing. doesn’t mean they can be easily fooled. Is this stuff really art? Who knows, You earn their respect when you say, but the kids enjoy it enormously! o “I goofed. You’re right.” Infants & Toddlers Parenting

Dance with your baby? Hang on! Why not? A baby learns from the Most parents know what it is to constantly ask yourself, “Is she doing movement she experiences as she is worry about how well their children all right?” being lifted, held, carried and cared are doing. Most parents also know Don’t pressure your child into for as well as from the movements of how good it is to enjoy and savor their performing at an ever-higher level. her own body. children’s growing up experiences. Don't make her feel that you love her An infant’s nervous system is not In every child’s growing up, there only if she performs well. She should yet completely developed and she are ups and downs. One day you think know that you love her because she startles easily. A loud noise, a sudden she’ll surely be President. The next day is your child. movement or loss of support can be you think you’ll be lucky if your child Above all, let your child know frightening to her. manages to stay out of jail! in a hundred different ways that you These swings between good and However, gentle rhythmic motion love her. The knowledge that she bad feelings about your child are all is soothing. That’s why babies respond matters, that she is loved for herself part of the business of being a parent. alone, is the greatest gift you can give to being rocked or walked when they o are uncomfortable or wakeful. Being a parent is a truly great your child. experience, but at times, it can cause But dancing? Yes, dancing! you exasperation! Be assured that such Discipline Remember, babies learn from be- wild swings in feelings are perfectly ing moved as well as moving. A very normal. Like most other parents, you young baby cannot yet learn from probably also wonder sometimes if rapid or jerky movements but she can you’re doing the right thing. Reward vs. bribe learn from smooth, rhythmic changes In fact, it may encourage you to of position. know that: (1) Almost every parent What’s the difference between a reward and a bribe? So, if you enjoy moving to music, has felt what you are feeling now; (2) your baby will enjoy it, too. Find some There are so many good things about A reward is offered ahead of time, music that is soft and rhythmic. Hold your child’s growth and development before a child is asked to do something. your baby gently but firmly so that which can give you pleasure; and (3) For example, a child may be promised a she feels secure. Then sway from side One or two problems now won’t af- reward if he helps his parent bag leaves to side, move forward and backward, fect your child forever. or put away groceries. For the child, the twist and turn in time to the music. You can get from this stage in your reward reinforces his good behavior. lives to the next stage by: (1) Living A bribe, on the other hand, is used Your movements will stimulate with your child’s development prob- to encourage a child to do something the sense organs deep within the lems from day-to-day; (2) Enjoying he has already refused to do. A parent baby’s ears. The sensations she ex- her, laughing with her, holding her might offer a candy bar to the child periences will help her develop the close when the dark moments close who has refused to clean up his room, position sense and balance she will in upon both of you; and (3) Simply for example. need when she tries to sit, stand, and getting through the ordinary routines walk later on. Bribes tend to teach a child that of each day. he can get what he wants by refusing If you hum along with the music, If you ever feel being a parent is to cooperate. your baby will get additional stimula- getting too difficult for you, talk to a Fortunately, for many young chil- tion from the vibration of your chest. close friend or other parents who can dren, the best reward for a job well If you enjoy moving to music, share their experiences. done is an adult’s praise. And the more your pleasure will communicate itself Whatever you do, don’t mentally attention and praise you dispense for to your baby as you hold her. Sweet bite your fingernails or waste your good behavior, the more good behavior music and gentle movements while emotional energy in wondering if you’ll see. holding your baby securely are the you are a “perfect parent,” whatever Save the rewards for special occa- ingredients for some happy moments that might be. sions. By thinking ahead, you can do for both of you. o Don't hover over your child, or- away with bribes altogether. o Science & Nature Behavior

Nature for the very Tips for getting kids to bed young Here are some ideas that may help forting and can come to rely on its A young child learns best from at bedtime: repetition each evening. direct, personal experience. • Have a set bedtime. “When the • If necessary, provide a small A toddler may be able to point to big hand is on the seven, it’s time to night light, a quiet radio, or a trusted a picture-book duck and say “Quack! get ready for bed,” or “When the companion, like a favorite stuffed Quack!” But until she encounters a clock says these numbers” ... can be animal. real waddling, swimming duck, her un- part of the routine. derstanding of a duck will be limited. • If your child doesn’t fall asleep In this way the clock, not the If nature learning makes you think at once, there’s no harm in reading or parent, is announcing the time to go only of forests and seashores, remem- playing quietly in bed, even if after to bed. ber that many valuable, first-hand bedtime. A child can’t go to sleep on demand any more than an adult can. experiences can easily be provided A warning of “ten minutes until close to home. bath time” is also useful so that fun Adults know that by lying quietly With a plastic squirt bottle, a child isn’t suddenly interrupted. This helps in bed long enough, sleep will come. can mist a spider’s web, instantly creat- children get used to the idea that there Children haven’t had this much ex- ing the beauty of early morning dew will be a change in the action soon. perience, and have to “learn” how to go to sleep. — and an opportunity to marvel at • Minimize television, media and the spider’s unique talent for creating rowdy activities close to sleeping time. A slow-paced environment, an engineering marvel. As bedtime nears, it’s a good idea to soothing bedtime routine — which A child can rub baby oil onto fa- slow down, reduce activities and noise may include a bath, a bedtime story, vorite stones, deepening their colors in preparation for sleep. and ritual goodnight — and quiet and making them shine. conversation sets the stage for a good • A nighttime routine can work night’s sleep. Sit down carefully and watch the wonders. For instance, start with a busy work of ants as they scurry to warm, calm bath, followed by a ritual If you tiptoe in ten or fifteen and fro. And you can wonder out goodnight to the dog, the piano, the minutes later, you’ll probably find loud about where they’re going and moon, grandma and grandpa in a your youngster was overtaken by the what they’re going to do when they picture, the refrigerator … sandman. get there. Once you find a routine that works Then just switch off the light and Why not set up a bird feeder near well, stay with it. Children find this whisper, “Sweet dreams …” o a window? Even young babies enjoy kind of activity soothing and com- the sight of fluttering wings. An older child can help prepare a peanut butter and birdseed ball for the feathered Growing Together is published by Growing Child, Inc., visitors. FREE! P.O. Box 2505 W. Lafayette, IN 47996 Even the idea of a bath can be ©2021 Growing Child, Inc. “Grandma Says” is a twice-monthly Telephone: (765) 464-0920. made fun by considering how other email that includes general parenting Customer Service:1-800-927-7289. creatures take a bath— the robin who tips, words of encouragement, and Growing Child also publishes: jumps into the outside birdbath, and children's book reviews. Growing Child (birth-six years), and the cat who patiently and carefully Issues are free of advertisements; Growing Up (grades K-12). email addresses are shared with no one. Growing Together issues may be reproduced washes her face each morning with in part or in full by participating organizations. her paws. Get the next issue by signing up at: Articles in Growing Together refer Most parents know more about https://growingchild.com/grandma-says to both boys and girls. For simplicity, the pro- nouns “he” and “she” are used nature than they think they do — and Written by a very wise grandmother; interchangeably unless otherwise noted. the child in your house is just waiting From the publishers of Growing Child www.growingchild.com to hear the fascinating stories you and Growing Together have to tell. o May 2021 Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

1 May Day!

Put together a basket of flowers for a friend.

Kentucky Derby today.

2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Waffles for breakfast! Ask Mom and Dad what Practice hugging. Cinco de Mayo Read a story about Eat something good for Put banana halves on they used to wear to bedtime before you go you today. popsicle sticks. school. In what country is this day to bed. Dip in yogurt and celebrated? granola. Freeze. Eat.

9 10 11 12 13 14 15 Mother's Day. Bananas, crackers and Find a small cardboard Find out the names of Use the flat side of Select some toys and sort Everybody dance peanut butter for a snack. box with a lid. Decorate flowers you see in bloom crayons to create an them into threee different it with craons, markers, now. ourdoor scene. piles. THE TWIST! sticks and glitter. WOW! LARGE Medium Small Put your name on top.

16 17 18 19 20 21 22 Spend some time at a Find two things that are How many thumbs do Count the number of Just for fun: Which would Pretend your bed is a ship Play "Dress Up." park today. blue in the kitchenl. you have? Why is that? ears in your house. (Don't you rather be: a horse or a and go for a sail! forget Fluffy and Ruff.) monkey? Why?

23 24 25 26 27 28 29 Have a cook- Name 5 Today is Tuesday. Count all the chairs in Look outside and count Use plastic containers to Talk about ways to show out dinner. 30 words that What is tomorrow? your house. the birds you see. stack and play with. kindness to others. rhyme Big race day ... Memorial Day. with 9,451? Indy 500!! "toe." Remember those who served our country.