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The Vagina Monologues sponsored by QuantUM March 11-12, 8 p.m. The Rock FREE!

An unnuanced parody of the original novel

BY GABE HABASH place teetering on the brink of nuclear ar- dom starts to set in. SENIOR EDGE WRITER mageddon. Richard Nixon is well into his The film is technically stellar and the fifth term as president and the Cold War is opening credits sequence is incredible. While The film adaptation of , dangerously close to turning hot. Costumed the central issues of morality and responsi- one of the most famous graphic novels heroes, once mainstays in the United States, bility are included, the film tries to include ever, comes with much anticipation to have been banned and chaos reigns in the too much in too little time for the result not see if the supposedly unfilmable novel streets. If that’s not bad enough, someone to become muddled. can somehow work. Though it looks begins knocking off the retired heroes as Watchmen may please diehard fans, but great and retains some of the novel’s the Doomsday Clock (meant to estimate it’s very unlikely to make new ones. Pick up essence, it feels misguided and, even humanity’s proximity to total annihilation) the novel instead; it’s one of the best books worse, boring. ticks closer to midnight. one could read. Set in an alternate-universe 1980s, This is an unfair distillation of the rich the world of Watchmen is an unstable and deep source material, but the film pro- vides just that. It’s unreasonable to expect all the nuances to translate to the screen be- cause the novel itself is so dense and thrives 1.5 out of 4 stars on ambiguity. The film makes a noble effort to cover most of the bases, but when a movie tries to summarize and remains nearly three hours long, the result tends to be confusing. Gabe Habash may be contacted at ghabash@ And, because the mind’s not engaged, bore- themiamihurricane.com. ‘Watchmen’ soundtrack thrills, even if film doesn’t

BY SARAH B. PILCHICK in the movie itself, Massive Attack’s stun- OF THE STAFF ning “Angel” was featured in television ad- vertisements, which, sadly, were one of the In the case of Watchmen, the sound- best things about Watchmen. Unfortunately, track is far superior to the film itself. While the movie is forever tainted by awkwardly Watchmen had a great concept that translat- using Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” as ed poorly, the eclectic and mostly brilliant background music while II and the musical choices seemed to fill the gaps of get it on. the boring film. The Watchmen soundtrack also loses Watchmen’s soundtrack is reminiscent serious points for including My Chemical of Children of Men, in which Donovan Romance’s abysmal cover of “Desolation and the Rolling Stones cover were paired Row,” a song that sounds so utterly out of with songs by the Libertines and John Len- place in the company of Dylan, Joplin and non. Here, KC & the Sunshine Band stands Simone. Perhaps it was a play for the young- alongside songs by Nat King Cole and Nina er age bracket that did not grow up obsessing Simone. over the original graphic novel, but it was The best-utilized songs are Simon and simply a poor choice for the coveted spot of Garfunkel’s “The Sound of Silence” and the last song of the film. Janis Joplin’s “Me & Bobby McGee.” Bob Dylan’s “The Times, They Are A-Changin’” Sarah B. Pilchick may be contacted at is part of the most outstanding opening se- [email protected]. quence in recent memory. While not heard

March 9 - 11, 2009 THE MIAMI HURRICANE EDGE 9