The Chopping Block Burger

Extract from previous issue of the Ratpack The Chopping Block Burger

Death row inmates’ final meal requests make for fascinating internet reading, writes David Shaw.

1 ‘So, Shaw, if you were going to die tomorrow morning, what would you want for dinner tonight?’

2 Friends who are alternatively amused and appalled by my obsession with eating well have asked that question and I’ve never known how to answer. But some people do. They’re on death row, and, according to long-standing tradition on death rows almost everywhere, they can ask for virtually anything they want for dinner on the night before their execution – and, within reason, they’re likely to get it.

3 Morbid though it might seem, people are so interested in convicts’ last meals that, until last month, the Texas Department of Criminal Justice listed its inmates’ requests on its website – every item requested for every final dinner since Texas resumed capital punishment in 1982.

4 When the department redesigned its website in mid-December, officials decided to delete the last-meal listings.

5 “We had some complaints from people who thought it was in poor taste,” says Michelle Lyons, a department spokesman. “Of course, new people are complaining that the last meals are missing from our site.”

6 But why had the state listed the final meals for so long? I always thought it was because Texas was proud of its record of being, by far, the nation’s leading official killer, having executed 314 people since 1982. But Lyons said the last-meal information was listed solely because “that was the No 1 inquiry from the public” about death row inmates.

7 Other states report similar curiosity about inmates’ final meals, and at least two – California and Arizona – continue to list those requests on their websites.

8 Before it was discontinued, the Texas list of last meals provided fascinating if macabre reading. Brian Price, who prepared 220 final meals in the Huntsville, Texas, prison kitchen while an inmate himself before he was paroled last year, has written a book featuring recipes for some of those last bites before oblivion. Meals to Die For, scheduled for publication next month, will have 42 recipes, including those with jarring names such as “post-mortem potato soup”, “uh-oh I’m dead meat loaf” and “rice rigor mortis”.

9 The 504-page book will contain Price’s personal recollections of the execution day for each of the 220 killers whose last meals he cooked, as well as his accounts of the cases that led to 42 of the executions.

10 Although I often buy cookbooks for my wife, I don’t expect Meals to Die For to be on my shopping list; Lucy’s taste runs more to salmon with red wine mushroom sauce than to Price’s “last-wish fish with time’s-up tartar sauce.”

11 Not that fish was a death row favourite. What was? I guessed steak as the top choice. I was wrong. It’s French fries. Of the 314 inmates, 111 asked for fries. (Apparently, one’s last meal is not an occasion to worry about government studies that say fries are one of the most unhealthful foods on the planet.)

12 Hamburgers were the second-most-popular food, with 85 requests. Price’s cookbook calls the inmates’ favourite final meal “chopping block cheeseburger and firing squad French fries”. (I guess killers in Texas aren’t completely different from the rest of us; according to two- thirds of the respondents in a nation-wide poll by Food & Wine magazine last year, a burger and fries is seen as the “quintessential American food”.)

Glossary: capital punishment n. the legally authorized killing of someone as punishment for a crime. death row n. a prison block or section for those sentenced to death.

Supplied by © Macrat Publishing May 2020 Extract from previous issue of the Ratpack The Chopping Block Burger

COMPREHENSION AND LANGUAGE

Read the article ‘The Chopping Block Burger’ and answer the following questions.

Questions: Refer to the lead paragraph. 1. Account for (give a reason) for the apostrophe after inmates in ‘Death row inmates’ final meal …’ (1)

Refer to paragraph 1. 2. Rewrite the first sentence, “So, Shaw … dinner tonight” in reported speech. Start your sentence: Shaw was asked … (3)

Refer to paragraph 2. 3. Provide a synonym for ‘appalled’. (1) GRUESOME? 4. Explain the expression ‘they’re on death row’. (2)

5. Name the part of speech for ‘long-standing’. (1)

Refer to paragraph 3. 6. Why, do you think, are people so interested in the last meals of convicts? (2)

7. ‘… since Texas resumed capital punishment …’ Explain what the word ‘resumed’ indicates about Texan punishment of criminals. (2)

Refer to paragraph 6. 8. The impression of Texas conveyed at the beginning of this paragraph is A. bloodthirsty and vengeful B. efficient and organised C. law-abiding and disciplined D. friendly and supportive Select one and write down the letter of your choice. (1)

Refer to paragraph 8. 9. Is the following statement true or false? The word ‘macabre’ means ‘horrible’ or ‘gruesome’. (1)

Refer to paragraph 9. 10. How appropriate is the title of the book, Meals to Die For, in your opinion? Do you find it amusing or objectionable? Supply a reason for your answer. (2)

Refer to paragraph 8 and 10. 11. In these paragraphs the author mentions a number of dishes. Use your imagination to re-name any ONE of the following along similar lines: A. Shepherd’s Pie B. Spaghetti Bolognaise C. Meat balls (2)

Supplied by © Macrat Publishing May 2020 Extract from previous issue of the Ratpack

Refer to paragraph 11. 12. The tone of ‘Apparently, one’s last meal is not an occasion to worry about …’ is tongue-in-cheek. Explain why this statement is humorous. (1)

13. Provide the correct version of the word ‘unhealthful’ in ‘… one of the most unhealthful foods …’ (2)

Refer to paragraph 12. 14. Hamburgers are the ‘quintessential American food’. What is the South African equivalent? (Provide one example.) (1)

Refer to the title. 15. The journalist, the late David Shaw, has deliberately used ambiguity in the title, ‘Chopping Block’. (Ambiguity occurs when there are two different interpretations to an expression, sentence or word). Explain why the ambiguity here is appropriate. (3)

25 MARKS

Suggested answers: 1. possession  (1) 2. Shaw was asked if he  was going  to die the next day (the following morning) , what he  would  like for dinner that night.  ½ x 6 (3) 3. dismayed / disheartened / disgusted / horrified (accept appropriate response)  (1) 4. They are in the section of a prison reserved for inmates who are awaiting execution.  (Accept: The special area in prison where prisoners await their executions.)  (2) 5. (compound) adjective  (1) 6. Perhaps people have a morbid fascination with death  and they might believe that convicts’ last meal choices might tell them about the personalities of these convicts.  (Accept appropriate responses.) (2) 7. It means that they stopped capital punishment / the death penalty for a time  but brought it back again.  (2) 8. A (1) 9. True  (1) 10. Amusing because there is a pun on the words ‘to die for’ i.e. an expression describing something amazing/worth dying for and the last meals chosen by prisoners about to die. OR Objectionable because it is tasteless to make money from cheap puns relating to people facing execution. (2) 11. Sharp-shooter Shepherd’s Pie; Mafia Boss Bolognaise; Morbid Meat Balls (Accept appropriate responses which show some imagination combined with some clear link to the dish.) (2) 12. It is humorous because the author is making a sarcastic comment about the very unhealthy meal choices of the convicts on death row.  The author points out the very obvious fact that health is no longer a concern for these convicts as they are soon going to be unhealthy in the extreme i.e. dead.  (2) 13. unhealthy  (1) 14. Boerewors and pap; Chakalaka and pap; Bobotie (Accept a number of variations due to the vast cultural differences in South Africa.) (1) 15. In the title, the ‘chopping block’ could be a board on which food is chopped (literal meaning) or it could refer to the expression ‘to be on the chopping block’ (figurative meaning) which means to be awaiting your death or in grave trouble.  The title is therefore appropriate as the article is about the choices and preparation of the last meals for inmates on death row.  (3)

Supplied by © Macrat Publishing May 2020 Extract from previous issue of the Ratpack

PUNNY figure of speech

Figures of speech make language more interesting. For example, when we say that the face of the sea was stormy, we know that the sea does not really have a face! We are not using the word ‘face’ literally, but ‘figuratively’.

A clever play on words is a figure of speech called a PUN. Humour or nuance is added by using words that sound the same but have different meanings. Puns are often used in headlines of newspapers and magazines or in jokes. For example:

Newspaper headings

Cricketers chirp about bad playing conditions

(Play on the word: ‘cricket’ – an insect that chirps and a person who plays the game of cricket.)

Plumber in hot water over charging too much!

(Pun based on the expression: ‘in hot water’, which means ‘in trouble’, and the actual hot water a plumber works with when he fixes taps etc.)

Jokes

Why is a river rich? Because it has two banks. What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike? The pavement! (Pun on the word: ‘banks’ – of a river and where one (Play on the double meaning of ‘hardest thing’ – gets money.) most difficult / feels hard when you fall.)

Now it’s your turn!

Provide written explanations for the puns in the following examples.

1. Why was the Because he was

crab arrested? always pinching things!

2. What happened to the man who listened to a match? He burned his ear.

3. Where were chips first fried? In Greece.

4. Butcher, have you got a sheep’s head? No, it’s just the way I part my hair.

5. What makes a tree noisy? Its bark.

6. A ghost walks into a bar at midnight and asks the barman for a whisky. “Sorry,” the barman says, “we don’t serve spirits after 11.”

7. “No, no!” said the businessman to the salesman. “I cannot see you today!” “That’s fine,” said the salesman, “I’m selling spectacles.”

8. Newsflash: Forty pedigree dogs stolen from kennels. Police say they have no leads.

9. Why is it so hot after a rugby match? Because all the fans leave. Suggested answers on last page 10. Pizza shop slogan: Seven days without pizza makes one weak.

Supplied by © Macrat Publishing May 2020 Extract from previous issue of the Ratpack POETRY QUEST

If possible, watch or listen to a reading of the poem ‘The Highwayman’ before you start the set assignment.

The Highwayman By Alfred Noyes PART ONE 1 The wind was a torrent of darkness among the gusty trees. 2 The moon was a ghostly galleon tossed upon cloudy seas. 3 The road was a ribbon of moonlight over the purple moor, 4 And the highwayman came riding— 5 Riding—riding— 6 The highwayman came riding, up to the old inn-door.

7 He’d a French cocked-hat on his forehead, a bunch of lace at his chin, 8 A coat of the claret velvet, and breeches of brown doe-skin. 9 They fitted with never a wrinkle. His boots were up to the thigh. 10 And he rode with a jewelled twinkle, 11 His pistol butts a-twinkle, 12 His rapier hilt a-twinkle, under the jewelled sky.

13 Over the cobbles he clattered and clashed in the dark inn-yard. 14 He tapped with his whip on the shutters, but all was locked and barred. 15 He whistled a tune to the window, and who should be waiting there 16 But the landlord’s black-eyed daughter, 17 Bess, the landlord’s daughter, 18 Plaiting a dark red love-knot into her long black hair.

19 And dark in the dark old inn-yard a stable-wicket creaked 20 Where Tim the ostler listened. His face was white and peaked. 21 His eyes were hollows of madness, his hair like mouldy hay, 22 But he loved the landlord’s daughter, 23 The landlord’s red-lipped daughter. 24 Dumb as a dog he listened, and he heard the robber say—

25 “One kiss, my bonny sweetheart, I’m after a prize to-night, 26 But I shall be back with the yellow gold before the morning light; 27 Yet, if they press me sharply, and harry me through the day, 28 Then look for me by moonlight, 29 Watch for me by moonlight, 30 I’ll come to thee by moonlight, though hell should bar the way.”

31 He rose upright in the stirrups. He scarce could reach her hand, 32 But she loosened her hair in the casement. His face burnt like a brand 33 As the black cascade of perfume came tumbling over his breast; 34 And he kissed its waves in the moonlight, 35 (O, sweet black waves in the moonlight!) 36 Then he tugged at his rein in the moonlight, and galloped away to the west.

You can read the rest of the story (PART TWO) on https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems-and- poets/poems/detail/43187 OR watch the video on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryu1JZiSbHo

(Both accessed 10/07/2017)

Supplied by © Macrat Publishing May 2020 Extract from previous issue of the Ratpack

POETRY QUEST

WORD QUEST

A. In the poem, ‘The Highwayman’, the poet uses old-fashioned language. Match the following words from the poem with the descriptions of their meanings in this context.

1. torrent A. Short trousers fastened just below the knee

2. gusty B. A thin, light sharp-pointed sword

3. galleon C. A man who works in a stable looking after the horses of people staying at an inn

4. moor D. Leather made from the skin of a female deer

5. claret E. Archaic or dialect form of ‘you’

6. breeches F. Blowing hard

7. doe-skin G. Round stones used to cover road surfaces

8. rapier H. A sailing ship used from the 15th to the 18th centuries

9. cobbles I. A pouring out

10. ostler J. A tract of open uncultivated land, typically covered with heather

11. peaked K. Persistently carry out attacks on an enemy

12. harry L. A window

13. thee M. An identifying mark made with a special iron

14. casement N. Dark red

15. brand O. Sickly-looking

16. cascade P. A surge

B. Make a chart like the one below and list the adjectives which Alfred Noyes uses to describe the characters and the background in the poem.

Adjectives used to describe:

Bess The highwayman Tim, the ostler The inn The weather

Adjectives can be used to create more drama or to add meaning to your writing. But, don’t over-use them or your writing may seem silly and unrealistic.

SOUND DEVICE QUEST Discuss: C. Read lines 1-12 What effect does the poet create by 1. Quote THREE examples of alliteration. using so many sound devices? 2. Quote TWO examples of assonance. How does the rhythm and rhyme D. Read lines 13-18 contribute to the overall effect? Find and quote an example of onomatopoeia.

FOLLOW-UP ACTIVITY:  This type of poem is called a ballad. Find other examples of ballads to read together in class. Write a modern parody of a ballad based on a topical event / news story.

 Prepare a storyboard for a film version of ‘The Highwayman’.

Suggested answers: A. 1. P 2. F 3. H 4. J 5. N 6. A 7. D 8. B 9. G 10. C 11. O 12. K 13. E 14. L 15. M 16. I B. Bess The highwayman Tim, the ostler The inn The weather black-eyed French (cocked-hat) white (face) old (inn-door) gusty (trees) (daughter) long, black (hair) brown (doe-skin peaked (face) dark (inn-yard) ghostly (galleon – breeches) moon) bonny (sweetheart) claret (velvet coat) mouldy (hay – hair) locked cloudy (seas) red-lipped jewelled (twinkle – (Also adverb: dumb) barred jewelled (sky) (daughter)) the way he rode) sweet black (waves of hair) C. 1. ‘ghostly galleon’; ‘coat of the claret’; ‘breeches of brown’; ‘moonight over the purple moor’ 2. ‘moonlight over the purple moor’; ‘Riding – riding – / The highwayman came riding …’ / ‘jewelled’ ‘twinkle … jewelled sky’ / ‘wrinkle … twinkle’ D. ‘Over the cobbles he clattered and clashed …’ / ‘stable-wicket creake

Punny Figures of Speech

Suggested answers for questions on p.6: 1. Play on the words ‘pinching things’ – ‘pinching things’ with its pincers, or ‘pinching things’ meaning stealing things. The humour is in the fact that the second meaning fits in with the crab being arrested. 2. The pun is on the word ‘match’ – he is listening to a ‘match’ as in a soccer match, or contest or a ‘match’ as in something you strike to light a fire (thus burning his ear). 3. The pun is on the word ‘Greece’ – a country in Europe and ‘grease’ which sounds the same but has a different meaning i.e. animal fat used to cook chips. 4. The pun is on the word ‘sheep’s head’ – the person wants to buy a ‘sheep’s head’ to eat but the butcher thinks he is referring to his head as looking like a sheep’s. (Ok, not so funny!) 5. The pun is on the word ‘bark’ – the covering of the tree, or the noise made by dogs. 6. The pun is on the word ‘spirits’ – ghostly apparitions, or alcoholic drinks. 7. The play on words is on ‘I cannot see you today’ – the salesman is selling spectacles so his understanding is that the man cannot see at all instead of not being able to meet with him. 8. The pun is on the word ‘leads’ – ‘leads’ used to walk dogs, or ‘leads’ as in possible clues for the police to follow in the investigation. 9. The pun is on the word ‘fans’ – ‘fans’ as in the rugby supporters, or ‘fans’ which provide wind to cool people down. 10. The pun is on the word ‘weak’ – ‘weak’ as in having no strength, or ‘week’ (with a different spelling but the same sound) making up seven days.

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