There’s more to Kevin Elms than meets the eye. He was the longest-serving club trainer in League history and was, among other things, a villainous professional wrestler, a competitive weightlifter, a trainer in various sports around the world and a wharfie who knew how to handle himself. BEN COLLINS AFL RECORD THE LION TRAINER

evin Elms got far more LASTING LOYALTY: from football Kevin Elms with a Lions’ Team of the than he ever Century guernsey. imagined, and the AFL Record got far more than we imagined when we interviewed him. We sought out the 82-year-old because he is believed to have been the longest-serving club trainer in League history, logging 57 consecutive years spread over three clubs: Richmond (1960-61), Fitzroy (1962-96) and the (1997-2017). When we visit Elms at his home in Heidelberg Heights, in ’s north-east, we learn that the oracle of football trainers has been, and seen, much more than the average footy trainer. Small, stocky and cheerful, the lovable larrikin affectionately known as ‘Kevvy’ or ‘Elmsy’, greets us with a question of his own. “Tell me, son – why would you want to interview me?” he asks. “Nuthin’ special about me.” He then makes a mockery of his own words by telling rollicking yarns from an at-times tough and often eventful life. The old brick house Elms shares with his wife Alice displays many PHOTO: ADAM TRAFFORD/AFL PHOTOS mementoes from decades spent with Fitzroy and the Brisbane Lions. A lounge room wall is dominated Elms had forcefully intervened. Fire Brigade chief Jack Patterson, by a framed tribute to Lions great This provoked a menacing visit arrived at Elms’ house in “a flash car” Jonathan Brown, whose inscription from the volatile gunman, who with a proposal. The rotund reads: “To Elmsy, Happy 80th mate. in turn was threatened by Bill, a ‘Big Jack’, a Fitzroy fan, asked Elms Thanks for all your support over the formidable fist-fighter. That was to take the Lions for weight training, years. You’re a Lions legend …” Soon after, feared gangster Fred which was coming into vogue. At a Lions function, Brown ‘The Frog’ Harrison approached my lot for A few weeks later, Elms filled in put a black Texta to work again, Kevin Elms in a Richmond pub and as a trainer when some regulars writing on the back of Elms’s advised him to be more gentle were ill. white dress shirt: “To Kev, My with the thuggish older man the next “And that was my lot for the next best mate. Love you …” in future. 50-odd years!” Elms chortles. Of Brown, Elms says: “I also “Yes, Mr Harrison,” Elms replied. 50-odd Soon after joining Fitzroy, Elms’s looked after his father Brian He recalls: “That was the only reputation as a strongman led to a (a former Fitzroy player), so young time we ever spoke, but whenever years! stunning career change. ‘Browny’ and I go back a long way. he saw me in the pub he’d just nod KEVIN ELMS ON BECOMING The Record had heard that Elms Super player, super bloke and a his head. He had these frightening, A TRAINER WITH THE LIONS might have been an amateur bloody tough bugger.” steel-blue eyes.” wrestler, but he corrects us: “Pro Elms is a tough bugger, too. Elms only ever played football wrestler. Yeah, for a few years He had to be. The sixth born of at school – “not very well, either,” back in the ’60s.” 12 children in 1935 – sandwiched he admits – but from a young Turns out he appeared on between the Great Depression and age he knew he had “the touch” television with fearsome customers World War II – his family soon to help athletes prepare, recover such as Killer Kowalski, Brute moved from Fitzroy to Richmond. and repair. Bernard and Skull Murphy. “It was a tough area. I knew all In 1960 he became a trainer at Completing this what-the-heck the gangsters and knockabouts,” Tigerland. He lasted only two years revelation, Elms reveals he says Elms, who was a wharfie in the before being sacked by new club performed as a villain named 1960s and ’70s and also worked in secretary Graeme Richmond. ‘Ivan The Terrible’, donning a red a meatworks and as a truckie. This was no surprise to Elms. He mask and heckling crowds with “I was never in trouble myself and ‘GR’ had been rivals in amateur a Russian accent. Hence, his but, gee, I saw some shocking weightlifting championships, and relative anonymity. things – blokes getting bashed, Elms had always beaten the future Unfortunately, Elms no longer has blokes getting shot …” Tigers powerbroker. any photographs of his wrestling Elms and his brother Bill could “We never got on. He couldn’t take days, but he retains great memories. have become victims of a notorious losing,” Elms says. Elms took centre stage at assassin. The hitman’s father had An opportunity soon presented Melbourne’s Festival Hall (where attacked a defenceless old man and itself when Elms’ uncle, Metropolitan he vividly recalls taking on Hawaiian

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wrestler Professor Tanaka) and at Sydney venues, along with ‘tent shows’ around the country. “I wrestled to survive. It was hard work, but it was never boring,” Nine times he says. There was always the danger out of 10 Fitzroy endured many hardships, have a light massage and then he’d of injury (despite the moves being but Elms did his best to lift morale. just sit there and put a ball against choreographed), but Elms emerged “There was a time to be serious the wall and focus,” Elms says. relatively unscathed, aside from I was right and a time for fun, and when “Leon Harris upset the applecart some fractured ribs. KEVIN ELMS ON it came to fun I was the worst one day by arriving before Bernie. His wrestling background ASSESSING INJURIES instigator. I was a villain,” he says. I said, ‘What are you doing?’ Leon helped his standing among the He also was exceptional at the said he wanted to get ready. I said, Fitzroy players. serious stuff, and eventually plied his ‘No, you’ve got to wait for Bernie.’ “Some players were actually MEMORIES: (Above trade at two Olympic Games and four But Leon was determined to get frightened of me, even though they right) Former Fitzroy Australian Open tennis tournaments, ready, so I strapped him. captain and for the Australian women’s “In walks Bernie and he’s not would’ve done me over. I had ’em and Elms embrace after bluffed,” he says. the club’s last game, hockey team and the touring happy. He said, ‘You know I’ve got to “If a player gave me cheek, I in front of Lions legend Swedish Davis Cup tennis team. be first.’ He was upset all day and he might put his bag in the freezer. Kevin Murray; while Fitzroy star John Murphy hardly got a kick. Then he had his Elms has a special wouldn’t go to anyone else for shower and just left. That usually gave him some bond with Hawthorn manners. But he might say, ‘I’ll get great Dermott Brereton treatment after Elms – under “The committee told Leon: ‘For that Kevvy,’ and he’d be warned, (above) through a direction from club doctor and goodness sake, don’t do that again.’ ‘Oh, don’t do that – Kevvy used to be mutual love of wrestling. former Wimbledon doubles I knew not to do it again, too.” a wrestler. He’ll body-slam you.’ But champion John Fraser – healed At times Elms would realign really, I wouldn’t have been able to a thigh injury that should have players’ attitudes, including then lift them.” sidelined him. captain Paul Roos. Elms’s time in the squared circle “I’ve just got a feel for it,” Elms Elms and Roos have a good also helped forge a bond with explains. “I can pick injuries, even relationship. Noting Elms’s running Hawthorn champion Dermott watching the telly. I had a lot of gait, Roos called him ‘Shuffles’. Brereton, who Elms got to know blues with physios, and nine times One training night, Roos tried as a trainer for the Victorian team out of 10 I was right.” to go straight to the front of the in the 1980s. Occasionally he got it wrong in strapping queue, bypassing four “Dermie is a mad wrestling fan other ways, as illustrated by a story under-19s who were ahead of him. and during the warm-up a few he shares about Fitzroy superstar Elms sent the skipper to the back of times when we played Hawthorn, Bernie Quinlan. the line and Roos cuddled him and he’d put me in a headlock and throw “Bernie would get to games very apologised to all present. me down. Everyone thought it was early – before the seconds ran out. Elms served under 23 senior fair dinkum!” He’d be the first to be strapped, he’d coaches. Only one –

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– had a specific pre-game form the Brisbane Lions, the new requirement for him. LION KINGS: Elms’s entity was keen to engage Fitzroy No. 1 fan, Jonathan “I had to have a Mars Bar ready Brown, and the signed people and Elms was approached. for ‘Wallsy’ before a game,” Elms Brown guernsey that “The thing that swayed me was says. “Thankfully, I never forgot.” hangs proudly in that Brisbane took on the Fitzroy During the Walls era, Elms did the veteran trainer’s song, they recognised our honour lounge room. forget something, and he still board, there was a Fitzroy look to giggles about his punishment. the jumper and they took on the After Sunday morning training Lions name,” he says. sessions he was to ensure there The Lions initially flew Elms to were two dozen bottles of beer each game before deciding it was and $100 of fish and chips on offer. more practical for him to just work One time he forgot the food, so he at their Melbourne games. was dragged across the muddy Son Bill also became a Lions oval and his car was covered in trainer and then the driver of the shaving cream. team bus. Elms soon exacted revenge. It wasn’t until Elms’s 42nd He got permission from Walls to season that he finally experienced leave training early for a family a premiership, in 2001 – the first birthday and, before departing, leg of a hat-trick. he filled the baths with cold water It had been a remarkable and clothes from the lockers. “It change of fortunes given that only caused mayhem,” he says. five years earlier he’d feared for There were numerous larks. In his life, let alone whether he’d the 1989 reserves Grand Final, a return to football. group of Geelong fans taunted “When we won the first Elms, but when Fitzroy won, after premiership, I kissed the ground, an amazing comeback, he threw and I cried. I was just so proud to a bucket of water over them. be involved,” Elms says. “They gave me a bucketin’, so I The worst injury Elms saw gave them one!” was when Fitzroy’s Darryl Cox Elms actually played a reserves suffered a horribly dislocated game when the Lions were short collarbone (“I felt sick looking in the 1970s. “With a minute to go at it, so imagine how bad he they put me in the forward pocket. felt”) and the player he deemed I could’ve taken a mark, but the ball best at playing with pain was bounced off my chest.” I was just Brisbane star Nigel Lappin, He and Alice, now proud who famously starred in the great-grandparents, have three 2003 Grand Final against offspring – Tracey, Bill and so proud Collingwood with broken ribs Kevin jnr, who was once a and a punctured lung. Fitzroy prospect. to be Before the Lions’ 2004 Grand Elms was so dedicated to Fitzroy Final loss to Port Adelaide, Elms that when Tracey was planning her involved sensed they had run their race. wedding, he warned her: “Don’t KEVIN ELMS ON THE FIRST “The players had nothing left – get married in the footy season or I OF THREE LIONS’ FLAGS mentally or physically. You could won’t be coming.” feel it in the rooms – it was dead,” He recalls: “They got married he says. the same day we had a practice “You could feel it when you match, and I forgot my good socks massaged their muscles. Hawthorn so I had to wear my Fitzroy ones also found it too tough to win four under my suit.” in a row.” Fitzroy’s demise shattered Elms. Elms and fellow trainer Lance After the club’s last game against Upton were farewelled by the Lions Fremantle, a photograph was taken earlier this year. in the middle of Subiaco Oval of “I’d planned to retire when a tearful Elms embracing former Browny did (in 2014), but I loved it Fitzroy captain Ron Alexander. too much to stop,” Elms says. Elms almost died with his club. “Football makes boys better “It destroyed me,” he says, his men, and it helps men enjoy the eyes moistening. “The stress of it camaraderie and fellowship of all hurt my health. I had a bad skin each other.” cancer. I was touch and go. It slowed Elms still isn’t finished. For some my recovery too. years he has helped out local club “I’ve never gotten over losing my North Heidelberg in the Northern club. I laid awake at night thinking Football League, where AFL games about it.” record-holder Brent Harvey and his Elms had more skin cancer brother Shane play. removed earlier this year. “I need “The Harvey boys call me Mr my own trainer to keep me going,” Elms. The others call me ‘The he says. Guru’,” he says. Elms kept going as a trainer “I want to die at the football. when he least expected it. When Just not yet!” Fitzroy merged with Brisbane to @bencollocollins

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